Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
13, October
Dear Diary,
The world has been falling down around me. For some reason I can't sleep tonight. The castle is quiet, everyone else is asleep. I have never seen the common room so empty.
There is great tension between Ginny and Harry. Since last year, since they revealed how they felt about each other, nothing has been the same. There is this space between them, filled by this quiet, this long, lingering, hard quiet. I can't get them to break it.
"Talk to her," I tell Harry.
"I can't. I won't put her in danger, Hermione. I will not do that to her."
Sometimes I think that Harry really is a fool. Ginny doesn't care about the danger. She loves him! She has loved him since she was eleven years old and she will love him until she dies. I am sure of it.
Yes, she did pretend that she was okay with him not wanting to be with her during the war, but how could he believe that she was telling the truth when she told him that? Girls hardly ever say what they mean, but even after all this time of being my friend, he still has no clue what a girl thinks like.
I suppose I can't blame Harry for being a little worried. We all are lately. Nothing has been the same since...well, since last year. Since Dumbledore...died.
I admit I was foolish. I trusted Snape just as much as the professors did. I even believed that Malfoy wasn't evil, wasn't against us. I was wrong. Or maybe...I don't know. Something tells me, some kind of a nagging voice in the back of my head tells me that maybe I wasn't so wrong. Maybe I was right and maybe, just maybe they weren't so evil. And if that's true, then maybe there is hope that Snape is really on our side. And maybe Malfoy can be as well.
14, October
Dear Diary,
Professor McGonagall made the best choice she could, I think, rehiring Professor Lupin to be out Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. Many parents protested, stating that they didn't want a werewolf to be teaching their children, but she merely reminded them that she was now in charge of Hogwarts.
Of course that meant that she could no longer be in charge of Gryffindor house, which was fine, because she appointed Professor Lupin to that duty as well. I think having him here is a small comfort to Harry. Since Dumbledore's death he seems almost in a fog. Now he has someone here who he trusts.
True, he is no Dumbledore, and he is no Sirius, but he is someone who Harry trusts. That is something.
Ron got a letter from his mum today. Apparently Bill is doing better everyday, and Molly is even becoming more use to the idea that Fleur will soon be a member of the family. I don't know how I feel about that, but I'm not a member of their family. I just think that Fleur is a brainless prat. And I know I'm not alone.
Molly seems to like Fleur now though. Or at least, she doesn't bother her as much as she use to. It's most likely because Fleur was so nonchalant about Bill being attacked by a werewolf. I guess she really does love him.
Ron however has been totally nutter lately. He has been acting so strange around me lately. He sat down next to me in the common room and just kept fidgeting, kept looking at me. I dropped my quill. "Is there something the matter, Ron?"
"Um...um..no."
"Then would you please tell me why you are sitting there, looking at me as though I have grown an extra head?"
"I...um." He cleared his throat. "Well, Hermione, I just-"
"Excuse me, but could you two please stop talking? Some of us are trying to work."
Lavender has hated me since last year, since I had gotten so upset about her dating Ron. I don't even think dating is the right word. They were sucking each other's faces off to be honest. Either way she treats me as though I have the plague or something.
So much has changed since last year. People are no longer here, there are some of use who rarely speak anymore as well.
Some things never change though: Ron still asks me for help with our assignments all the time.
15, October
Dear Diary,
Mrs. Weasley sent us an owl to tell us the ministry heard from Malfoy through an owl. He told nothing about where he is or what he is doing, but he told us that he is sorry for what happened here last year. He claimed he never wanted to kill Dumbledore but was told he had to. That he couldn't so it.
"He's bloody lying!" Ron roared. "He doesn't give a damn about what happened here! He wishes we had all died!"
"But he didn't kill Dumbledore," I reminded him.
"Because he didn't get the chance to," Ron said. "He was beaten to it by Snape."
I decided not to talk to them about this anymore. What was the point? All it would do was get us into an argument and I didn't need us fighting like that. We had done so much fighting in the past that now, if we were to go at it, I don't know if our friendship could handle it. And if it couldn't I would lose one of my best friends.
I don't think I could live with that.
16, October
Dear Diary,
Do you ever get that feeling that something big is going to happen? One of those feelings that you just can't explain, but it's there? Like something is just around the corner that is going to change your world forever?
Last night I dreamt about Snape and Malfoy. They were standing on the edge of the Dark Forest. There was something so sad in Malfoy's eyes. I can't explain what it was. I wish I could but there was this fear that no one would forgive him for what happened, that he would be hated for the rest of his life, and I remember thinking, that he was a Malfoy and wouldn't care about that.
"Granger, you have to listen to me," he whispered into the dark. "Something horrible is going to happen here. Hogwarts..its not safe."
I stood there looking at him. "Like before? Like when you betrayed us all?"
Maybe it was my imagination, but I could have sworn he flinched. "Listen to me, if you hate me, I understand that, but you have to believe me. If you stay here, you'll die, Granger."
"Even if that were true, why would you tell me? Why would you care?"
Snape sneered at me. "Stupid girl. Not as smart as you think you are, are you Miss Granger? If you cannot understand, then people gave you too much credit."
"Listen to me Granger, this is not about who you are. This is about what you can do," Draco told me. "You have to get out of here."
"What are you talking about? What can I do?"
"You can be the turning point in so many things. You will be able to do so much, Granger. You have to leave this place before you die."
"But-"
"Just leave, Granger. Leave Hogwarts!"
I woke up in a cold sweat. I wish I knew what this dream was about. I wish I could talk to someone about it, but I can't. Harry and Ron would go completely nutter if they knew.