The door opened and Sheppard instantly went into military mode, sweeping his legs from under the covers and reaching under his bed for his gear, all the while feeling utterly sleepy and somewhat confused, "What's going on? Is the city okay?" he asked rubbing at his eyes and standing to stretch.

The silhouette in the door walked in and sat down onto the bed beside him, "Nothing's wrong, don't worry."

Sheppard looked down at Mckay and shook his head, he dropped the vest that was in one hand and realised in his confusion he had picked up his lamp in the other, which led to him to ask, how in the hell had he got that mixed up with his earpiece?

He chose to sit on the chair next to his bed and leant his head against his hand, "Its like…..two in the morning," he said sleepily.

Mckay looked up at him through the dark and reached over to turn on the lamp. Sheppard shielded his eyes and spoke whilst his hands were still over them, "Spill it."

"You just left it there," said Mckay wringing his hands, "Okay so I've come to the conclusion that you didn't save them. Not in the conventional sense right? They were dead when you bought them back?"

Sheppard lowered his hands and was silent for a moment before clapping his hands together and leaning forward, "Well done Mckay."

Mckay scowled at him and raised a finger, "This isn't a game."

"I know that Rodney."

"So what happened then? You couldn't save them right? Or they died in the Helicopter on the way back."

Sheppard was tired and he was in no mood to tackle this whole event with Mckay, especially in the early hours of the morning. He was still feeling unwell on the tablets he was taking and Mckay's non stop talking was beginning to hurt his head.

"Get me on this mission tomorrow," said Sheppard.

"What?" asked Mckay looking over to the man opposite him. He was starting to feel a bit bad about waking him. However, it had been funny to see him scramble around like that in response to a likely threat.

"Look, tell Beckett and Elizabeth tomorrow I'm good to go on this mission and then….I might be more inclined to tell you something."

"You're kidding, right?" asked Mckay. It was rather unusual that Sheppard was asking him this but he figured that he knew Beckett would say no.

"Look, Its an easy mission. We're just finalising the negotiations with the Ethurians," he said as he stood up, "I need some space. I need to get off Atlantis, get some downtime away from Beckett and his mini penlight and all of the questions about the chair."

"And then you'll talk?" asked Mckay.

"I said then I'd be more inclined to talk. Look these pills are working. I haven't had another seizure and I feel well enough to go on this mission."

Mckay stood, joining him in his pace, "Are you sure you're up to it?"

Sheppard gave him a look which told him he was.

Of course it was a cleverly concealed lie.

"At the morning de-briefing I'll ask," he said as he went over to the door, "But I wont promise anything. And if you do go, then I want you to tell me what this is all about."

Sheppard got back into his bed and pulled the covers over his head whilst waving a hand dismissively.

"You hear me Sheppard?"

"Yes," the mumbled reply came, "Then you'll find out. There, you happy, now go, goodnight."

------------------

Mckay walked into the debriefing room and found Elizabeth and Beckett sat together in deep thought.

"What's going on here?" asked Mckay coming to sit beside them.

Beckett looked up from a file in front of him but it was Elizabeth who spoke first, "Beckett was going over the information regarding the chair." She sat back and let her hands dance across the table whilst she thought, "Its disturbing stuff."

"Certainly is," said Beckett with a shake of his head. He skimmed through the pages of the file which was obviously Sheppard's.

"We're just beginning to scratch the surface," said Mckay reaching into his pocket for a power bar and opening it up. When he was nervous he ate and today he was going to eat a lot, "The ancients really believed they could use it for a higher purpose, it's a shame they were obviously misguided."

"Obviously Rodney," said Beckett closing the file, "But its still going to be the only way Sheppard will get better."

"How so?" asked Elizabeth leaning forward.

"Neurologically the chair has messed with his brain chemistry. He must let the chair extract the whole image so his mind and the chair can reconcile themselves."

"It's a matter of balance really," said Mckay, "As with anything," he threw in for good measure, "The chair only has half the information and Sheppard only gave half the information, so ergo, he has to get back in."

"Will it hurt him?" asked Elizabeth her eyes going between the two men.

"It might cause him some discomfort," said Beckett, "but I believe it will be for the best. At the moment the medication is suppressing the seizures, but when he finally has a seizure, either through default or through him missing a dose the results could be catastrophic."

Elizabeth nodded and looked up when Teyla entered the room, "Hi Teyla."

"Doctor Weir," she said looking at all three of them. Curiosity sparked in her eyes, "Am I late?"

"No," said Elizabeth, "We're early."

"So about this mission today," started Mckay, taking another nervous bite into his power bar, "Its just finalising the minor details of the negotiations right?" He glanced up quickly.

"Yes," said Elizabeth with a nod.

"Is Sheppard going to take us?" asked Mckay again keeping his eyes down and chewing even more furiously, "Because I think he should…take us..that is."

"Beckett?" asked Elizabeth.

"I'm not sure that would be a good idea right now."

"And you think having him cooped here will be any better, he just wants to go off world for a bit of space," blurted out Mckay.

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes, "You've already spoken to him?"

"I just…I," stuttered Mckay, "Look," he said dejectedly, "He just wants to go off world for some air."

"We have air here," said Beckett prodding a finger down onto the file.

"Different non Atlantis air," Mckay said rolling his eyes, "And the medication has stopped the seizures."

"I'm not sure Rodney," said Beckett.

They all looked up when Sheppard swaggered into the room and shoving his hands into his pockets he tried to look as innocent as possible on seeing them all there, "Hey," he said and his eyes immediately locked with Mckay's.

Mckay's eyes were telling him…abort…abort!

"So the mission?" he asked.

"We already know," said Elizabeth.

Sheppard tried to keep his face neutral, "What are you talking about?" he tried.

"We know you want to go on the mission and we know you tried to get Mckay to do your bidding," said Elizabeth.

"You make me sound like some kind of evil genius," said Sheppard pulling out a seat and sitting down.

"Evil yes, genius, not so much," muttered Mckay.

"Look," said Sheppard smiling at them all, "I'm perfectly capable of going on this mission. I've been dealing with Atreu personally so he will be expecting me and I'm feeling good. The pills are doing their job Doc."

He stared at them all and tried to look confident and calm. His insides were screaming out, he wanted, needed, to get away from Atlantis for a while.

Beckett seemed to consider it, "I'm not happy about it."

Sheppard sat forward, "Is that a yes?" He was smiling fully now, beaming at the prospect of a bit of freedom.

"You cant stay on the medication forever," said Beckett.

"Why can he not?" asked Teyla finally voicing an opinion.

"Yeah, why not?" asked Sheppard.

"We don't know how long they might be effective for, not to mention the long term side effects they might have on your body. We need to seek alternative-"

Sheppard held a hand up, "Look, when I get back we'll talk about my options. Whilst the pills are working I want to keep taking them. Its my choice right?"

Beckett nodded.

"So?" he asked waggling his eyebrows.

Elizabeth had to admit, that the prospect of him going off world had made him more Sheppard like. Gone was the solemn smile and gone were the bags under his eyes. She figured him going was for the good of his sanity and after a minutes silence, she said, "You can go."
"Yes," said Sheppard a bit too loudly.

"But, you check in every few hours and no overnight stays. I want you back as soon as possible."

Sheppard stood, "Okay guys, gear up we set off in an hour." He watched as Mckay trudged passed him and Teyla gave him a tap on the shoulder as she passed, "Thank you," he said to Beckett and Elizabeth before practically skipping out the door.

----------------

The trip off world had been exactly what Sheppard had needed and although he was still feeling rotten on the pills he had managed to hide that fact fairly well.

As they approached the village Mckay had started his one may crusade to wind him up again, "So?"

Sheppard turned to Teyla and gave her a smile, "How are you today?"

Mckay knew he was being ignored and waited patiently whilst Sheppard talked to Teyla about the Athosians and the mainland. He knew he was doing it so he couldn't talk to him, but he had other plans and promptly jabbed Sheppard in the side with a finger.

Sheppard let out a grunt and turned to him, "What?"

"I was asking you a question?"

Sheppard turned to Teyla, "Can you believe this?"

"Major, are we going to ignore the real reason you want to get off Atlantis?" Mckay said nearly tripping over a fallen log in his path.

Sheppard grabbed his elbow before he went down, "No."

"You'd rather take pills the rest of your life?"

Sheppard was having a hard time controlling his anger and moved to the right just as they approached a tree, forcing Mckay to stop or walk into it, "You did that on purpose," he shouted as Sheppard walked on.

"Yes, yes I did," said Sheppard with a smile.

"Why are you aggravating Doctor Mckay?" asked Teyla.

"Oh you know Mckay and me. We just like to wind each other up."

"There is some merit to his words," she said looking up at him with brown eyes.

Sheppard readjusted the P90 at his vest and kept his voice low, "Everyone has an opinion huh?"

"If the chair will cure you," she started.

"The chairs a damn joke. Nobody seems to care that I don't want to get back in the thing, so would you leave it. Both of you," he said turning back to Mckay and pointing a finger at him.

They had arrived at the village just as it was getting dark there and had been welcomed into a wooden hut of sorts for a meal.

Sheppard had started to feel his stomach roll as soon as he had smelt the rich food that they had prepared and he knew he would have to be polite and eat it. The three of them were all sat near the head of the table, with Teyla to his left and Mckay to his right.

Sheppard managed to eat a bit of food and came up with the cunning plan of placing bits of his food onto Mckay's plate. The weird thing was that Mckay never noticed and Sheppard surmised that he was just a greedy bastard. Sheppard managed to stow away a bread roll in his vest pocket when nobody was looking and was considering putting a kind of mashed potato into his pocket when Atreu addressed him directly, "You are enjoying the food?" he asked indicating to Sheppard's near clean plate.

"Yes, you really have put out a spread for us," said Sheppard taking a bite into some of the meat just for show. His stomach did a flop at the thought of digesting it and Sheppard just continued to smile whilst he chewed.

His watch beeped and he looked at the display. It was time for his dose of his medication and fishing into his pocket he took the pill with a glass of water.

"That your meds?" asked Mckay from beside him.

Sheppard swallowed hard against the nausea he had begun to feel and nodded weakly.

"Do you think this is lemon?"Mckay asked thrusting a piece of unidentifiable food under Sheppard's nose. Sheppard fought the sensation to throw up and felt himself go a bit green but managed to push his hand away, "I don't know, it looks like potato."

"But its yellow," said Mckay eyeing it suspiciously.

"So everything yellow is lemon," snorted Sheppard.

"I believe it is a spice of some kind," said Teyla, "Like this," she said and pushed another plateful of food right under Sheppard's nose.

Mckay was looking at the plate and nodding, "Yes that is yellow. I think its safe."

Sheppard swiped away at the food and went to stand.

"Where are you going?" asked Mckay.

Sheppard was just about to tell him he was going to go outside for some air when Atreu stood up and grabbed him by the arm, dragging him to the head of the very crowded table.

Sheppard's head was now spinning and he tried to keep everything in perspective. That was difficult when everything moved around.

"Major Sheppard, you have made a good deal with my people. A deal which has been brokered on peace." He held up a glass and handed one to Sheppard. He took it gingerly and held it in the air, forcing a smile onto his pallid face.

"Now to bind the agreement, we must eat the kolas."

"Kolas?" asked Sheppard and he turned to Atreu for an answer.

He watched as one of Atreu's men bought around a dish and took off a cloth covering it. Underneath it was some kind of slimy, green mushy substance which looked a bit like baby vomit. Not that he had ever looked at baby vomit closely.

"That," said Atreu proudly.

"And I have to eat that?" said Sheppard bringing a hand up to his stomach as it rolled notably.

Sheppard's eyes found Mckay and he could see that he was smiling. Teyla was also trying to hide her apparent amusement at the situation.

Atreu pushed his hand into the substance and scooped out some, dipping his fingers into his mouth and swallowing the stuff in one move. "Now you," he said pushing Sheppard's hand towards the bowl.

Sheppard was swallowing every second now, trying to keep the rising bile at bay. He plunged his hands into the substance and found an unpleasant smell come towards his nostrils. He bought it up to his mouth and said, "Here goes," before putting it into his mouth and mentally forcing himself to swallow it.

Atreu clapped him on the back and said, "The deal is done. Now eat."

Sheppard nodded and pointed to outside, "I'm just going to…I'll uh be right back," he said and practically ran out of the door.

As soon as the door closed behind him he heaved up his stomach contents next to the doorway and immediately felt better for it. That stuff had been gross and enough to send anybody over the edge.

The door opened and Mckay stormed out, nearly slipping on the mess on the floor and he seemed to back away from Sheppard immediately, "Oh god, did you have to do that there?" he said looking down at his feet, "Now its on my shoes."

Sheppard leant against the outside of the hit, his head against the wood and spitting the bile from his mouth, "That was disgusting," he murmured, "It was like……." He pointed at the floor, "Like that."

Mckay shook his head and maintained a distance from the Major, "Well at least you waited till you were out here."

"Oh you have eaten that?" he asked.

"Well you wanted to come here," said Mckay. "How long have you been unwell?"

Sheppard looked over to him, "Since I ate that crap," he shuddered.

"No, before that. How long?"

"You noticed?" asked Sheppard walking over to him and sitting down on a tree stump nearby.

"Well you've been green all day," said Mckay shoving him aside and sitting next to him, "You still convinced these pills are the way to go?"

Sheppard took his head form his hands long enough to glance at him, "No."

"So you'll go in the chair?"

Sheppard seemed to think about it, "It's difficult," he said as he leant forward.

"We'll all be there, it doesn't have to be."

"You'll all be there. That's the problem." Said Sheppard, "You ever have secrets, things you'd rather not have people know?"

Mckay rubbed at his chin whilst he thought, "I guess."

"Exactly."

Mckay stood up and patted him on the shoulder, "Well you've agreed now. Its binding so in the chair you go."

"As long as there's no Kolas involved," he said clapping a hand over his mouth.

"Not near me," said Mckay turning away.

Sheppard groaned.

"We have to get out of here," Mckay said looking at his watch.

Sheppard looked up at him, his face sweating and asked, "Why?"

"You just took your meds and no doubt threw them up again. We need to get back to Beckett and get your next dose. We wont get the chair up and working and ready till at least tomorrow."

Sheppard stood up, "We just need to finish this food process and then we'll be good to go."

----------

It turned out the meal went on for a lot longer than they had anticipated and all in the vain of not offending Atreu and his people.

Sheppard had managed to nod his way through a number of conversations and Mckay had been purposely keeping an eye on him.

Within the last hour he had noticed Sheppard's eyes had become glassy and he had seemed vacant.

"Its time to go," he said standing up and grabbing Sheppard by the elbow.

He was surprised by his lack of protest and seemed to stand up without saying a word.

Atreu held up his hands, "Yes we have kept you here long enough."

"Well thank you and all that, for the food," said Mckay, "Say thank you Sheppard."

Sheppard seemed to snap out of his personal reverie and held his hand out, "Thank you," he said before a puzzled expression came over his face.

Mckay grabbed him and ushered Teyla out of the door but Atreu and his men followed them out to the village.

"Do you need escorts to the gate?" Atreu asked.

"No no, we're fine," said Mckay pushing on Sheppard. He had noticed a similar look on Sheppard's face a few days ago and knew something was going on in there. Beckett had warned against his missing a dose and that the effects could be devastating.

He was too late though and suddenly Sheppard grabbed his 9mil from his calf holster and held it up in front of him at some unseen enemy.

Atreu and his men all ducked, as did Teyla and Mckay stood between them all, panicking, "Sheppard, put the gun down."

Sheppard couldn't see him. He was lost in his own visual nightmare and he could see events in front of him, playing out beyond his control. "No," he said and Mckay watched as he fired off a shot from his weapon.

"Stop him," shouted Atreu, panic lacing his voice.

"Sheppard," Teyla shouted looking over to Mckay.

"He's seeing something which isnt there," said Mckay, "He's hallucinating," he said to Atreu.

Sheppard's eyes were unfocused and he was staring beyond him. There was no reaching him.

One of Atreu's people moved first and he dove at Sheppard and pushed him to the ground. He grabbed Sheppard's wrists and slammed them down onto the ground repeatedly until he dropped the weapon. Mckay could see Sheppard's knuckles had become bloodied from the savage pounding and he stepped forward.

"Stop, "said Mckay trying to reach Sheppard but he found himself restrained.

Atreu stepped forward, "Put him in a cell," he said sadly, "I do not know what is going on but this is unacceptable."

Sheppard was still moving and Mckay watched as Sheppard's hand was stamped on to prevent him from reaching out for his gun. His P90 had already been stripped off him and he was still moving around on the floor in obvious discomfort.

"He's not well," said Mckay, "You have to let us take him back."

"He will stay here till we decide what to do with him." Said Atreu angrily.

"Please," said McKay, "He needs help."

Sheppard was groaning as he was dragged away to a cell. The cell was outside and consisted of wooden branches laced together.

Mckay followed them as Sheppard was shoved into the cell. He dropped to the ground and didnt move.

"You may go," said Atreu with a flick of his hand.

Mckay stood helplessly and looked to Teyla, "Go back to the gate and let Atlantis know what's going on. I'll stay here and see if I can talk to them."

"Are you sure?"

Mckay looked back at Sheppard's prone body, "Somebody has to stay here with him in case he has a seizure. Tell Beckett he missed his last dose."

Teyla nodded and set off for the trees.

TBC

NEXT CHAP I PROMISE…keep those reviews coming.