Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or Sailor Moon. I don't even own plushies of any of the characters…!! ;-;

It hasn't been beta-read. Nothing's been done to it. And no matter how I edit it, it has once again fallen into Asia-chan's category of "cutesy". xD Feel free to be completely and brutally honest because chances are .. I'll agree with you. :DDD

Chapter 1

Duo sighed as he snapped the top of the clipboard absentmindedly, glancing down at the audition sheets, one for each girl with plenty of room for comments. It was almost ridiculous. Not once in his life had Duo acted as a judge of any kind especially not in an audition filled with four gorgeous, blonde women at very marry-able ages.

"I don't see why this has to be so detailed and well planned! Really! There're only four of them. How long could it possibly take?" he groaned as Quatre gave the thumbs up signal and retreated back to the control room for all of the building's hidden cameras. "I mean … what's with all the security cameras? Even in that bathroom? They never put one in the bathroom! It's just gross." He snapped the top of the clipboard again and drummed out a short rhythm onto the plastic.

Wufei paused to glance at him as he carried a box of small lasers that will be hidden and manned by Quatre into the room, preparing to hide them at strategic spots. "You're even more stupid than I take you for, Maxwell."

Duo rolled his eyes and propped his feet up onto the table in front of him, leaning onto the back two legs of the chair flippantly. "Give me a break, Wu-man. It's not as if some terrorist guy would come here, dress as a hot chick, and hold us all at gunpoint."

"You'd be surprised, Duo," Trowa muttered. He grabbed a clipboard and slid into the chair beside him.

The braided pilot laughed. "Yes, yes. I'm sure there're always guys like Wufei around, willing to do that kind of thing."

He gave a loud yelp as Wufei strode up to him, grabbed his propped up legs and heaved him backwards. Trowa watched as Duo teetered precariously on the two legs of the chair before falling back with a muffled "oomph". Quatre rushed out of the control room, eyes wide.

"Is he okay?"

Wufei scowled but had to admit he was a bit worried. Duo hadn't moved for the last thirty seconds. He walked over to the quiescent man who was still sitting in the chair as if it hadn't fallen at all. He peered down at Duo and pressed two fingers onto the pulse at the braided pilot's neck. Duo's eyes flew open.

Wufei jumped and staggered back.

"Man, Wu-man, you could've broken my back."

Wufei scowled at him. "It's a pity I didn't."

Duo blinked and glanced over at him from his vantagepoint on the ground. "And then what would you have done? How could you possibly get along without," Duo paused to puff his chest up a bit but failed miserably, "the God of Death?"

"Yes, yes. Next time I'll be sure to push you harder," Wufei mumbled to himself absentmindedly before walking out, carrying the now empty box with him to discard.

…………………

"Y'know, Rei, you didn't have to drive me there simply to make sure I don't chicken out," Usagi grumbled loudly as she stared straight ahead, a distinctly annoyed expression marring her features. "I'm not a wuss."

Rei glanced over as her jaw fell. "Well, Usa, you're definitely smarter than you look."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

From the driver's seat, Rei laughed. "It means that I'm surprised you even caught on to the reason why I'm acting as your chauffeur."

Usagi crossed her arms huffily and wrinkled her nose. "What makes you think that I won't totally bomb the audition? After all, I obviously don't have Relena Darlian's political and oratory skills."

"Right. And you think anybody else does?" Rei rolled her eyes and glanced back to check her blind spot before switching lanes and exiting off of the highway. "We're almost there."

Groaning, Usagi covered her eyes with her hands and sobbed dramatically. "Please save me from this monster."

"This monster is currently in control of the car going sixty miles per hour that you're sitting in, Usa." Rei narrowed her eyes and glared at her. They pulled into the parking lot of the standard office building, completely nondescript and parked. Rei's expression brightened dramatically. "Besides, that was some pretty realistic acting, Usa. You'll be the new Relena. I'm sure of it."

This time, no sharp reply flew back. Rei glanced over to see Usagi tugging uneasily at the collar of the conservative blouse she had made her wear, staring with trepidation up at the building.

…………………

"Let's see now … what exactly are we supposed to do?" Duo cocked his head and raised an eyebrow at the evaluation sheet in front of him, turning it sideways as if trying to decipher some alien language.

Hiiro glowered at him but chose not to reply. Duo, Trowa, and Wufei sat while he remained standing.

"All three of you will be evaluating the four women to see which one fits Relena's description, appearance, and personality more. Quatre will be behind the scenes in the control room."

Trowa glanced up at him. "And you? Where are you in all of this?"

Hiiro's face twisted into a dark scowl. "You think I want to be part of finding a replacement for Relena?"

Wufei snorted. "Oh, right. So instead you choose Maxwell to pick amongst the women. Maxwell the hormone driven freak. Maxwell the-"

"Okay, okay! I get it, Wu-man!"

"Wufei has a point. You are the Perfect Soldier, aren't you? You're the one without emotions. You'll obviously be the most objective out of all of us."

Hiiro stared down at the glass table and laid both hands, palms down, onto it, leaning. "I can't choose a replacement for her. It's like admitting she's dead." His voice was still that dark and chilling monotone but it was obvious from the way that he refused to look up that this was one of the few times Hiiro was actively showing a despairing and overpowering emotion.

Duo stared at him, aghast, mouth slightly open and eyes wide, before coming up with something to say. "Well, Hiiro, we all could've done something to have prevented this disease … I mean … it's not entirely your fault."

"Yes, but that doesn't mean Yui doesn't carry most of the fault," Wufei muttered darkly. "That doesn't excuse him from being the main cause behind the woman's weakness."

Trowa jabbed Wufei in the ribs. "Don't listen to him. Wufei has never had any tact."

"I resent that."

"Then you resent the truth."

Hiiro looked up and took his hands off of the table. His steely eyes that burned with a wintry blue flame scorched all of them. "That's not the point."

Duo frowned. "That is very much so the point, Hiiro."

"You, Hiiro, must redeem yourself by finding a replacement for Miss Relena so that the ESUN can veer off the path of war. This will be your apology to Miss Relena." Trowa's clear, incisive eyes never left Hiiro's face.

Several seconds ticked by before Hiiro's tense shoulders fell and he grabbed a clipboard. Duo let out a whoop.

"All right, Hiiro! And remember, all of these girls are dying to become Relena so they can be with you 24-7! Man, sometimes I'm so jealous of you."

Hiiro didn't need to tell Duo to shut up. Wufei and Trowa did it for him.

…………………

"I don't know why I even bother to hang out with you, Rei. You get me in the worst situations and somehow, in the end, everything gets blamed on me." Usagi rolled her eyes and leaned against the mirrors that acted as the elevator's walls. The red light above them flashed from one number to the next.

Rei grinned. "Well you obviously can't live without me. For one thing, how will you ever find your way to the supermarket?"

Usagi's mouth fell open as she frowned. "T-that was only a one time deal! Besides, that map was obviously misprinted."

"Right. Just like the one at college and the one we used in Detroit, and the one of your workplace, and the-"

"I get the point," she snapped.

"Give it up, Usa. You haven't had any sense of direction since the day you were born."

The blonde sniffed and fussily straightened her blouse and skirt. The elevator door slid open. "Well then, lead the way."

Rei chuckled, strode out onto the lush carpet, and looked for the arrows directing them to the right room number.

…………………

"The appearance of the girl is on a one to ten scale, ten being the best match, one being the worst. Everything else is on a one to five scale, five being the best. You'll be grading each girl on personality, oratory skills, habits, hobbies, preferences, acting skills, and political acumen."

Duo flipped boredly through the sheets on the clipboard, barely listening to Trowa's lecture.

"Under the scale of appearance, there will be several categories based on the one to five scale. You'll have to note the details of her eyes, of her facial features, posture, bone structure, hair, and height. Other than that…" Trowa trailed off and glanced at Hiiro.

"Each girl and most friends of that girl has already been sworn to secrecy in the case that she is not chosen but don't talk too freely or feed her any information until we have decided." Hiiro stared fixedly at Duo who made a face at him. "They should be here about now."

Trowa stood up. "I'll go direct them in."

…………………

"Do you think it's wise to just stroll in like this when you're obviously hated by nearly all five of the most feared men on earth?"

Rei shrugged and made a face. "It's not as if they can do anything to me. I mean they just went public as the pilots are few months back. The entire ESUN is watching their every move, waiting for them to display violent tendencies so that the Union can tighten the noose around their necks and squeeze the life o-"

"Okay, okay! It was a yes or no question, Rei." Usagi's mildly annoyed expression softened and she glanced towards her friend. "But still. Would you mind staying outside of the room? Just to prevent complications?"

Rei's smile dropped a little and she nodded.

"Hey! Are you two also here for the audition?"

"Yeah, we're-" Usagi glanced over her shoulder before her eyes widened and she turned around completely. Rei followed her action and gazed puzzledly at the girl.

"Usagi? You okay?"

Her lips were slightly parted as she blinked rapidly. In front of her was one of the most beautiful women she had ever seen. "You don't happen to be in the modeling industry…do you?"

The other girl blinked and then quickly smiled. "I'm Minako Aino and … I've just recently entered it."

"Usagi Tsukino," she replied absentmindedly before striding up to the startled woman and walking around her, nodding and muttering to herself. Minako glanced at Rei uneasily who smiled helplessly.

Finally, Usagi stopped in front of her and grabbed both of her hands excitedly. "You have to let me take pictures of you someday, Minako!"

"S-sure…"

There was a loud smack as Rei slapped her forehead and resignedly headed towards the room.

…………………

Two girls had already arrived from the east entrance of the building, one Dorothy Catalonia and one April Winner.

"Oh, man, of all the blonde girls in the world, two of the four had to be those two!" Duo lamented softly. "What did I do to deserve this punishment?"

Trowa glanced up. "How is that a punishment?"

"Because, Maxwell can't hit on Winner's sister because Winner might get angry and Maxwell's too chicken to hit on Catalonia."

Duo shot him a reproachful glare. "So you're brave enough to flirt with her?"

"I don't flirt. It's disgraceful, just like you."

"Oh, yes, but with a certain blonde doctor it isn't?"

Wufei shot up off of his seat. "Are you insinuating that-"

Both Trowa and Duo grabbed a handful of his shirt and yanked him back down before either of the girls could notice. Wufei was still fuming by the time the door opened again and the last two possible impersonators stepped into the room.

"Usagi Tsukino and Minako Aino," Hiiro read off. "We'll begin the screening now."

"I take back everything I said earlier. This is obviously going to be one of the brightest moments of my job as a Preventer," Duo whispered reverently.

"You are going according to the first letter of your last name. Minako Aino, you're first."

The blonde sat down uncertainly in the chair opposite of them and smiled.

Trowa leaned forward over his clipboard. "First off, tell us about yourself."

…………………

Argh! I hate it so much. :x It's just so … cutesy. [Asia-chan comes up with the best adjectives. xDxD] Make it stooooopppp…!! ::dies::

Gackt Camui: Lol … Zechs is so much prettier than Relena. :x But maybe some of that could be attributed to the areas of expertise the manga artist has…? xD Hmm … try taking Relena, take the bangs, the little braids, the blonde hair, the blue eyes, the etc etc etc and getting CLAMP or Naoko Tekeuchi to draw her. I think perhaps the results would be different. xD [I feel like such a traitor saying this but some of the official pictures of any of the GW characters are a little … bleh. :x] Roflrofl … I didn't quite understand the last part of your review until after awhile … oh goodness … ::tries desperately to forget:: Lol … interesting perspective, Gackt-san … interesting perspective… xDxD

C06 aka Lady Artemis: Relena being anorexic is selfish…? o_o ::makes mental note:: [I could use that… :D] Lol … as for the pairing … I actually don't have a preference at this point [but that could very well change. :D] sooo … there's really no telling who's going to be with Hiiro. :D I'm sorry I didn't email this chapter for you to edit. I'll be sure to email the next one. :DDD

Serena Yuy: Lol … you sound sugar high. :D And I'm sure the anorexia bit would have to, at least a bit, be attributed to Hiiro. xD

Sunshine Fia: "And we all know about Minako and cute guys!" roflrofl! :DDD I'd almost forgotten. xD And I'm not so sure the choosing of Relena would have anything to do with the judges' personal preferences … though it could interfere. :D However, the one who is chosen wouldn't necessarily be the one paired with Hiiro. :D

Firefly Princess: ::blushes:: Actually … I'm not sure I have any "on" days. xDxD Scandalous is posted under Callisto6 [my lovely co-author. 3] And it's strange … the moment I mention that I often get urges to right … they kind of … urk … stopped. xDxD [maybe it's just due to the rising level of busy-ness. :x]