"I had not thought death had undone so many"

The morning sun had barely begun clearing away the vestiges of night when Shinji started for school. It's formidable distance from his home forced him to begin walking while dawn was barely breaking. He held no bitterness however, since it gave him time to reflect as well enjoy a few precious moments without his father's presence. It was nice to breathe the cool morning air and to savor the sounds of chattering birds. His walks were one of the few things that still gave him pleasure.

School, however, was another matter entirely. As much as he liked his little journey, the thought of its destination caused Shinji's stomach to churn. School was awful. It was the one thing he hated most about his life besides Gendo, who gave him enough grief for several lifetimes already. But unfortunately, he had the added bonus of attending the hell hole that was Class 2-A. Lucky him.

As he walked, Shinji was suddenly struck by the thought of what he was going to when he had finished school. It was rather alarming now that he considered it, since there was really nothing that he wanted to do. Or rather, there was really nothing that he could do. How he had managed to get this far without being held back was beyond him. There was obviously no sense of order in this world.

But still, he would have to do somethingor risk ending up on the streets. "Wonderful", he thought, "out of the frying pan into the fire". Going from his father's house to the dark alleyways of Tokyo did not appeal to him at all. He could just imagine the smug look on Gendo's face if he saw him scavenging around for food, the smirk that said "I knew it".

No, he would make something of himself, somehow, someway. He'd do it just to spite that arrogant bastard. The only problem was keeping his resolve long enough to do it. Being the spineless coward that he was, his dreams always fell to pieces when he was back in his father's presence. The man's abrasive nature chipped away at him constantly, never letting him have a moment's peace. Why even now...

Damn. He thought too much. It was better to be just like one of those mindless drones that surrounded him at school. Whoever said ignorance was bliss hit it right on the mark. His classmates always seemed so happy, so carefree, just like normal people. But Shinji wasn't normal. He knew it, his father knew it, and his classmates certainly knew it as well. And people who were abnormal apparently could not afford the luxury of ignorance.

The looming buildings of his high school could be seen in the distance. He was nearly there. Now it was time to prepare himself for what looked to be another long day. To think he had actually been cheerful when he had started out this morning. But enough of that. His little reflections would have to end right here before he went in. He'd learned early on that thinking wasn't something one did in class. For one, it got in the way. And two, it left him open to attack.

He entered the empty courtyard and began the familiar path to his class. Though he hated being here, it was comforting to be the first one to arrive, since there was no one around. And that meant he could already be seated when everyone arrived, which left no openings in his defense. At least, for the time being.

Silently, he slipped into the empty classroom and seated himself in the very back, his favorite spot. Now all he had to do was wait for class to begin. A good half-hour remained, but in that short time students would be coming. And sure enough, here came one now. To his great discomfort, he saw that it was Ayanami Rei.

Ayanami was perhaps the one person in all of Tokyo who was stranger than he was. And that was saying something. Her striking physical appearance was already a subject for conversation, but her personality was something else altogether. Ayanami was an albino, possessed of pure white skin and sky blue hair. But that wasn't the first thing one noticed about her. It was the eyes. Her eyes were a dark red, contrasting sharply with her pale skin. The effect of blood on white only lent to her already disconcerting presence.

But that was not all. No, Ayanami was also as taciturn as a corpse and as cheerful as a graveyard. She never smiled. Ever. She remained an island unto herself and seemed to find it not the least bit uncomfortable. Even their teacher was vaguely disturbed by Ayanami, since he never dared call on her for a question. Yes, Ayanami Rei was the only person more alone than he was, but that only gave him more cause to worry.

Ayanami didn't even glance at him as she settled into her desk near the window. He wasn't surprised. The day Ayanami showed interest in anyone else would be the day the sun came crashing down. Nevertheless, Shinji could not help feeling a bit sorry for Rei. She didn't seem like such a bad person; it was her strange appearance and even stranger personality that caused others to stand back. But she couldn't really help that, could she?

Laughter suddenly pierced the still classroom as three more people entered. One of them, a brown haired boy with glasses, was apparently recounting some humorous incident, much to the amusement of a tall, muscular boy with black hair and the dismay of a girl whose light brown hair lay bound in a pony tail.

"And she still couldn't see me filming, and so that's when,"

"Kensuke, you do know you could be sent to prison for this, don't you?"

"Aw, leave him alone, Hikari. Kensuke's not dumb enough to let himself get caught."

"Right you are, Toji. A true genius like myself can do anything he sets his mind to."

"That still doesn't make you any less of a pervert."

"Shut up. Now where was I?"

"She still couldn't see you filming."

"Oh, yeah! Right. Now, I was getting a bit nervous to tell the truth..."

Aida Kensuke. Suzuhara Toji. Horaki Hikari. They were all good friends. They were all liked or respected in their own way at school. And they all made Shinji's life a living hell.

Suzuhara was the first one to notice him, as he always did. Toji seemed to relish the fact that he, with his muscular build and coveted athletic status, could do anything he wanted to Shinji and no one would say a thing about it. It wasn't that they were too afraid, although fear surely was a factor in the mix. No, it was simply that no really cared what happened to him, the loner. And so, Toji was left free to do what he did best.

"Hey look, it's Ikari!"

Kensuke immediately stopped his little story and began to smirk when he realized what his friend had in mind. Hikari merely looked away. She was the class representative after all, she had a duty to stop these kinds of things from happening. But it was just Shinji, right? Who cared?

Toji strolled over to the back of the classroom with Kensuke in his wake. Shinji made no move to get up. Where would he go? Anyway, any move on his part to avoid this would only prolong the torture. Better to get it over with now, than to suffer even more later.

"So what's with the sour look, Ikari? You always looked pissed when I see you."

Shinji said nothing.

" Aw, come on. You're not gonna give me the silent treatment, are you?"

Still nothing.

" Look, if you're sore about that beating I gave you last Friday, then you shouldn't have insulted Hikari."

He had merely stumbled and stepped on her foot. It hadn't been intentional. Not that it mattered.

" Oh, I see. You think you're too good to speak to me, is that it?"

Shinji dimly wondered if Toji actually believed his own lies.

" I can't stand stuck-up bastards like you. Do you see what he's doing, Kensuke?"

" Yeah."

Kensuke enjoyed goading Toji into his anger, since it gave him a chance to watch the show.

" Just watching you sit here makes me sick."

"Just hurry up," thought Shinji.

It was over in less than five seconds. Toji's punches always connected, leaving Shinji with an already darkening bruise. He wondered why Suzuhara always felt the need to justify himself before doing it. It wasn't as if he needed to or anything. Strange. But then again, the mentality of people like Suzuhara was something he would never understand.

By this time, the class had filled up with the other students. As he turned to leave, Toji casually remarked, " I'll see you around, Ikari." He rejoined Hikari at the front of the class and sat down as their teacher entered the classroom. "I know you will, you bastard," thought Shinji. "In the lockers, in the yard, at lunch. You'll find me somehow, you always do."