A/N: Yo! And welcome to 'How to take over the world7' Now, how is everyone tonight? I am glad a lot of you reviewed. TO THOSE LAZY ASSES WHO DON'T REVIEW, YOU ARE THE ONES WHO WILL NEVER TAKE OVER THE WORLD!
Now I am a lot better, and less sick. I just want to say 'Get Well' to all of those who are now sick. And that goes for my non-reviewers as well. I know what its like to be in school and then suddenly get sick. I felt terrible! Well, to Queen Of The Leos, get well my friend. I promise I will never make you tomato soup again.
Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans.
Dedicated to: Drummer Grl 13 and friend. Hi! Thanks for the ideas. I will use them wisely and in crazy different ways. Well you also might have noticed that in this chapter that I kind of mix your idea around. Babies galore!
… We all know that little kids can be…how I dread to say the word…cute. Just look at them, so tiny and innocent. But looks may be deceiving. At first glance we want to say, "Awwww! What a cute little woogy, snoogy, boogy baby!" Then you pinch their fat (or skeletal) cheeks. The baby gurgles and snot runs down their noses, making them seem more cute. You 'Aww' again, pat the baby (or skeleton with skin) on the head, and leave.
But from a far off distance, something so terrible, that it makes you want to run around with your arms in the air, screaming 'Help! My pants just suddenly filled up with shit' is heard. It is screaming, but its not just screaming, it is REALLY loud screaming. The screaming is coming from the baby you just 'Aww'ed at (and probably scared it so bad when you did so.).
People cover their ears as the baby yells and kicks its legs around. This is what Dr. Phil would say is, 'very bad behavior' or crying. Think of what pain and misery these people are going through now. The screaming from this one child is causing people around it, to drop to the floor in pain.
Idea number ten hundred and nine…
Babies and/or children are considered to be really adorable. When they act REAL cute and nice, they might get what they want. But without the cuteness or adorableness, they can be EVIL. (A/N: Evil spelt backwards is live. I felt like pointing that out.)
The screaming of a child can cause you to drop down in pain. Oh the screaming! That is why, instead of using a giant army of robots, use a giant army of children. Oh yeah! No body would hurt a child, not even those pesky Teen Titans. And then when they get all cute in front of people, you make them start screaming. People will be in misery on the floor.
Once you have conquered Gothum (sp?) you may start going to other towns and conquer those too. You and your army of babies will be unstoppable. Now have fun ruling the world. Kick major teen ass if necessary. (Ha! Which I doubt it will be.)
Slade's Notes: WHAT A STUPID IDEA! All the babies did was slobber, make noise, and poop…yeah. They especially pooped. Yuck! I'm going to throw this idea away. Babies…phew, they're just like smaller titans.
A/N: NOOOO! THIS IS NOT THE END OF MY CHAPTER…. I MADE MORE BECAUSE I FELT GENEROUS!
The extras…A/N: Yes, well earlier today I had this really awesome idea. I was typing out chapter 7 when I noticed, "How is this going to help ANYBODY take over the world? (Snicker) There was no point to my chapter, so I deleted it and made a new one. But I could not let this idea go to waste, and I wasn't about to make another chapter about the same thing. So here you go…. my ultra special extra!
"Idea number ten hundred and nine…
To first learn how to take over the world using children, we must learn how they function. Get to know one first… WHAT!" Slade screamed as he read from his big book of ideas.
"That is one of the dumbest ideas, EVER!" He slammed his book shut and got up. He began to pace the small, dark room, but looked back at the book every few seconds. Slade finally gave in and dived back into his chair, opening the book back to the page before.
"Get to know children. You must befriend them, before you learn how to take over the world…" Slade finished reading.
He shut the book and sighed. "I can't go to the daycare center anymore, though. I got kicked out."
Slade recalls…
"Hello, my name is Slade. I've come here to," Slade shifted his eyes around then did the air quotes, "play. My doctor said I had to interact with people and learn to relax."
The young secretary smiled real big and stood up, "Right this way Mr?"
"Slade."
"Right. Mr. Slade! Please, come with me." the secretary led Slade to a small children's table that was piled with blocks.
"Blocks are said to be a great activity to learn from. Enjoy yourself, Mr. Slade." The secretary turned away and left.
Slade sat on the tiny chair with his knees all the way up to his elbows. He began to stack the blocks and actually seemed to like it too. Little kids stared as Slade started giggling.
Two minutes later…
The stack of blacks fell down. "ARGH! YOU DAMN BLOCKS! I CURSE YOU TO HELL! TO HELL, YOU HEAR ME?" Slade cursed at the blacks.
Children screamed and ran around the room as Slade kicked the table and blocks. He took out a large laser gun and shot at the table. He mercifully laughed with pleasure as the table was being blown to pieces, "MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Back to reality, idiot…
"And it's not like any parent is going to lend me their child." Slade said. He took a second and thought about it.
Thought…what's with this guy's brain?
Slade walks up to some random lady on the street.
"Um, excuse me miss?" He asks.
"Yes?" The woman turns around with her baby in her arms.
"Can I, uh, barrow your baby, for the day?" he asks.
The lady gives Slade a weird look, "No."
"Oh okay, thank you for your time." He responds sadly.
"Oh no problem." The lady turns back around.
Slade pretends to start walking away, the quickly turns around and grabs the gum that's sitting in the lady's purse…
End thought…freak!
Slade laughed a little. "I like gum! And, there is one place I can go to seek children function, but it would be out of desperation." Slade looked out the window and stared at the titans tower.
"Yes, it would be out of desperation!"
Titans tower…
"You're jusht jeaoloushf of my shuperior lisping shkills!" Beast boy said.
"No, really BB, cut it out. That lisping is really weird." Cyborg said as he threw out old tofu from the fridge.
"Jeoloushf!" Beast boy crossed his arms.
"Beast boy, Cyborg is right. You really need to stop that lisping. It sounds weird." Raven said as she sat at the kitchen table.
Starfire giggled, "He sounds like a grishnick."
Robin typed at his laptop, stopped, and then asked, "Hey guy's, I was going through my log for Slade's attempts to destroy the city (or take over the world), has anyone noticed his ideas are a bit…strange?"
"Like how?" Cyborg asked.
"Um, I thought nothing of in when he used 'Control Freak's' remote to make the electronic store go crazy. And I didn't really care when he made a useless manual store or the free hat and lemonade stand. But I began to wonder about him when I started getting multiple phone calls trying to sell me stuff I didn't want. Then he was just crazy when he threw a piece of paper out the window, saying that he was going to take over the ice cream stores. But then when he showed up on TV, I knew something was wrong."
Everyone shook their heads, "No!"
Robin shrugged, "Me neither."
Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Starfire stood up and shouted, "I SHALL GET THE DOOR!"
She floated to the door and opened it with one of those usual, "How are you? And may I break your spine in a hug?" smiles.
"Yes, how may I assist you?" Starfire asked.
There stood a man with the body of Slade, the face of Slade, the evilness of Slade, but he was not Slade. On this mans metal suit was a nametag. This mans name was, "Helen." Starfire knew this was not Slade, for this person was Helen.
"Um, I was wondering if I could have any of the Teen Titans DNA? It would help me out with an experiment." Helen said.
"Well what is this, 'experiment'?" Starfire asked.
"I, uh, I will use DNA to help kittens, uh, do stuff." Helen shrugged.
Starfire lit up, "KITTENS? I LOVE KITTENS! I shall help you with this task, agreed?"
"NO!" Helen shouted.
"No?" Starfire grew sad.
"No." Helen said, calmer.
"You do not wish for me to assist you with this activity?" Starfire asked.
"It will be a surprise. I'll call you, okay?" Helen asked.
Starfire beamed and grabbed Helen and shook his hand vigorously, "YES! OH YES! Please Helen, take this jar of Friends: Cyborg, Raven, Beast boy, and Robin's DNA! It contains their hair and Cyborg's dead skin and teeth. My disposable and useless parts are in there as well. Please take care of the kitten's!" Starfire waved as Helen took off with the jar.
Starfire walked back to her friends, humming happily.
"Who was that Starfire?" Robin asked.
Starfire began to say who it was when there was a knock at the door. Robin stood up and said, "I'll get it this time."
"So who was it?" Raven asked Starfire.
"Kittens!" Starfire squealed.
Robin opened the door and gasped, "Slade!"
"Robin." Slade said and smiled.
"What are you doing here?" Robin asked and began to reach for his staff/pole.
Slade laughed pleasantly, "Oh Robin, Robin, Robin…Robin, I came here for business."
Robin didn't move from his stance and glared at Slade, "What kind of business?"
Slade turned his head to the left and kicked a small stone, he mumbled something then sighed, "I need you to do me a favor."
Robin relaxed, "What kind of favor?"
Slade bit the side of his cheek, "I need you to let me 'observe' you and your friends."
Robin crossed his arms, "What's in it for me?"
… Slade's house…
"Yes, this is Starfire... Hello Helen! How are the kittens?… Marvelous!"
"Dude, Uncle Slade, I need like another diaper change…uh, I mean soda."
"Booyah! I told you Robin! You are a big, big, big, doo-doo brain!"
"WAAAA! Uh, Slade, Cyborg called me a doo-doo brain!"
"This is stupid! Why are we doing this? I'm going to my room. I hate you! Don't ever talk to me again."
Slade stared at the titans in total shock. When he said that he needed them for observation on children, this is not what he had in mind. He didn't believe that they would actually act like pre-teens and children.
"Starfire, what are you doing?" Slade asked.
Starfire gave a snotty look, "Talking to friend Helen, duh!"
"Beast boy, no! You change your own diaper if you have one and get your own soft drink. You're capable."
"Cyborg, don't call Robin a doo-doo- brain. Robin, get over your pity party."
"Raven, sweetie. What's wrong? Please don't get all moody. Come out here and talk."
That night…
Slade's notes: Remind me never to be a parent. Looking after the Titans just for today was hard enough. They expected me to do everything for them and then Raven wanted me to listen to her problems. And Starfire needed money and the car to go to her friends, and she's still out! It's 1:30 AM, does she know curfew? I'm so worried. Then Cyborg and Robin just kept fighting all night long. Now Beast boy is crying and making a mess. ARG! Help me!
A/N: Aw! Poor Slade! So there you go! You chapter and an extra! I'm sorry if they sucked. I got some friends telling me to hurry the other day, and I felt a little rushed and out of ideas. Well review to me please.
Thank you, reviewers.
Infamous one: LOL! That was awesome. I have to keep that joke in mind. LOL! But it's true, it isn't cheap. Thank you so much for reviewing. Sorry if this chapter sucked. Blea!
ChineseLookin'Gal: Your story rocks! I liked it. Just keep up writing. If you check your stats, you'll see that lots of people hit on your story. That means, some people are reading it. You have to keep up writing, even though you don't get lots of reviews. If this is something you really enjoy, you keep at it. Good work! Thanks for reviewing!
Queen of the Leos: Ha, ha, ha! I laugh at your pain. Just kidding. So I'm glad you're home safe. Update your stories. TTYL!
Umbreon13: LOL! (Sticks hands in pockets) Oops no money. (Cries) I'm sorry you're stuck on the ceiling. I'll help you down. (Holds up hand) Oh and my bronchitis is gone. But it hurt so bad, I wont forget it. I love the smiley. Thanks for reviewing!
Drummer Grl 13: You like chapter, no? I really liked your idea. It was very funny. I always kind of change peoples ideas around, so sorry if your idea wasn't used the way you might've wanted it. I dedicated the chapter to you and your friend. Thanks so much again for the idea. Hi, friend!
Tim Fortune: Thanks so much for reviewing and the concern. I feel a lot better now.
Shipping-Slob: I see you changed your name. Yeah, I knew you were a girl. So I made a typo, I make lots. So was this chapter pointless enough? I didn't like it too much. I hope you think different! Thanks.
Phantom moon: Yeah! Teletubbies scare me so bad. I really hope they go off the air. Thanks 4 the review.