Me: YAY! I can't believe how long this story had gotten! Anderson: Well, if you enjoy making people doing weird things…Me: I'll drop your drawers if you keep it up with that insubordinate talk. Anderson: You're cruel. Me: And you're hot…did I just say that out loud? Anderson: GAH! Now I know why you keep threatening to do that, you loser you! Me: Dude, you're fictional, chill, and I only fantasize about you on horseback. ((sighs)) And damn it, you look hot. Anderson: I'm still scared. Me: Uh huh, you do that. Charlie: Hum, I'm bored. Me: Where did you come from? Charlie: You're mind stupid. Me: Oh yeah… Anderson: Do you fantasize about anyone else? Me: Danny Phantom. Anderson: Who the hell is that? Me: A cartoon character. Anderson: You've lost it. Charlie and Me: Yup.

So I know what you must be thinking, my god they can't be on vacation again already, right? Well, the first two terms of a school year pass that fast. And yes, we were heading out to vacation again. Today, however, I wasn't standing alone to wait. Everyone was there. I was laughing with Sabs when my car pulled into view. But there was something wrong, very wrong.

Theo was in the car, as was my mother, and everyone was dressed nice. I could smell holiday party. Damn. But they were occupied, so I kept yakking away with my friends. Then Rob had to make a bit of an announcement.

"Uh, my parents are doing this dumb Christmas party thing and you're all invited I guess." He said guiltily.

"Who cares?" said Anderson, "If you've only just told us that now, then obviously we can't go."

"Yeah, about that…"

"What?"

"You're parents were informed about a month ago." There was a collective groan all around. Rob continued. "But it's only you three, Neil, Sabrina and Charlie."

The remaining three were them happy; us other three moaned as the parental transport units pulled up.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

"I am not wearing that!" I told my mother as she presented me with the most embarrassing dress I'd ever seen. "No, absolutely not."

"Charlotte Dalton, put it on. I don't want you walking around in that uniform." Mom said.

"And what is wrong with it?" I asked.

"Charlie, put it on."

"No!"

"Charlie, please, just put the dress on."

"You know what? Sure. As soon as you answer one question. Would you wear that thing?"

No reply.

"I didn't think so." I said. "I'm wearing my uniform."

"Please, Charlie, put on the dress."

"No!"

"CHARLOTTE DALTON, YOU HAVE UNTIL THE COUNT OF TEN TO PUT THE DRESS ON!" Rar…

"No!"

"CHARLOTTE DALTON!"

"NO!" By now I was trying to escape the Overstreet's bathroom. Yeah, that's where we were, is that a problem? Whatever, anyway, back to trying to escape the evil dress. I had bolted out of the bathroom (yes, I know, I'm SO mature), and into the scattered guests that had already arrived. This is Avoiding Tactic #9: Run directly into a crowd of people your mother will be embarrassed in front of if she has to fight with you, and it almost always works. It also help that an unidentified person (Sabrina, as I learned later) made snide remark at the dress my mom was still holding in her hand. And thank the gods, I didn't have to wear it. So I resumed a position at the back of the party as plenty of people I didn't know came in. Neil was the last of my friends to arrive and he was turned out in very neat suit that made him look as if he was about forty. Sabs and I had a very good time of laughing at him, loudly, cruelly and for a long time.

Rob wasn't being a very good host, as he kept to his neighborhood friends, until, that is I bombed in on them. Katie remembered me and she didn't look pleased as she pursed he lips into a tight line. Rob was embarrassed, I was having a good time making him embarrassed, as was Anderson and Sabrina was having a very nice conversation with a equally smart looking boy. Life was good, as was Mrs. Overstreet's cooking and whoever brought that cheesecake, mm! Then, it happened…the gift exchange.

We (meaning all of us in the Society) had figured we were exempt from this holiday ritual having settled the matter earlier. But no, the parents had conspired to make us do this thing. And what an exchange it was. Rob's parents handed him something small and looking like a book to him for me. Sabrina was handed something that also looked to be a book for Anderson. I was given something for Sabrina that appeared to be a book, Anderson, well it was for Rob and you get the idea by now. Our parents and assembled peoples watched as we handed off the parcels. I unwrapped mine in a flurry of wrapping paper.

Artists of the Era was the title. I opened it slowly. It wasn't just art, it was also a poetry volume, for a poem accompanied nearly every illustration. Anderson received a battered copy of A Midsummer Night's Dream, Rob a copy of Romeo and Juliet and Sabrina a tome of literary terms and some of more modern greats. We all just sort of stared at the stuff, unsure of what to make of it. The dad's were exiting stage right for cigars.

"Let's go." I said to the others. Well, ok, just Sabrina and Anderson, Rob had gone back to his quote "normal" friends. "Let's find out what's up."

"Eavesdropping?" Sabs exclaimed. I exchanged glances with Anderson. Ah, the innocent.

"It's only eavesdropping if you get caught." I told her. "Now let's go."

It wasn't much work to find a hiding spot. We went out of the front door and wound our way around back. The dads, as you may have guessed by now, consisted of Overstreet, Dalton, Anderson and Meeks, were smoking out on the patio. We three huddled up.

"Think they'll get it?" Dad asked.

"I think they will." Mr. Anderson answered. "After all, I know I've told Neil that story about a thousand times."

"Same here." Chorused around the group.

"So, Nuwanda, did 'Charlie' Dalton really think she could slip up the original bad boy of Hellton?"

"I don't know." Dad answered, exhaling smoke. "Maybe, maybe not."

"Well, if that doesn't mess with their heads…"

"No kidding! A copy of Neil's play for the new Neil."

"Romeo and Juliet for the kid of the hopeless romantic."

"Modern artists and poets for the rebel."

"The rules for the goody two shoes!" Dad rounded off.

"I resent that. I'll have you know Sabrina is a well rounded and well behaved young lady. Which I hear is less than you can say for your daughter, Nuwanda."

"Well rounded and behaved my ass. Well, this is only recent development." Sabrina hissed.

"What can I say? She's too much of me and not enough of Liz."

I snorted with laughter. That was a little way too true. I mean, come on, how many girls you know run around in the middle of the night and have shared a room with a guy? Not too many, I'll bet.

"Too true."

"And what of your son, Todd? Seems he's a hell raiser too."

"Damn straight." Neil whispered in my ear. I elbowed his chest.

"Ah, he's all talk." Mr. Anderson swore.

"I am most certainly not!" Neil said indignantly. "I've gone through with plenty of things-

I elbowed him in the stomach before he blew our cover. Sabrina was wading nervously in the shadows, it disturbed her, this out right invasion of privacy.

"How about Robert, Knox, seems he's a good little boy like his daddy."

"He's good, behaves himself, wants a car, your average kid."

"Average is good enough for you? C'mon the kid's got to be good at something."

"He can play a little bit of baseball…"

"Too damn bad Hellton hasn't got a team."

"Yeah, but he wants to be an accountant."

"An accountant!" Anderson and I nearly fell backwards with laughter. Lord, we knew Rob was a stiff, but this was taking it to a whole new level.

"At sixteen? Yeah right."

Good old Dad, nature's natural contradictor at work.

"Yes, at sixteen, he wants to be an accountant."

"Nah, the Society will fix that."

"We don't even have proof they started it."

"With us telling them stories since day one? Yeah right, they probably started up long before Charlie got her hands on that book."

"You let her have it?"

"Of course."

"I guess we can only pray they don't get caught then."

"Yup."

"That would be a catastrophe if they got caught."

"No kidding."

Then there was silence and they spoke no more. So we crept back into the house, where it was warm. Anderson gave me a light slap upside the head. "Neat job you did there, Charlie. Real secret!"

"Oh shut up, at least no one else needs to know."

"Screw you."

"Thanks buddy."

"At least our cover isn't blown."

"Way to think positive."

"Neah." Anderson stuck out his tongue at me. I laughed at his suit. As the party went on, things loosened up and us private school students were integrated with the local population. And some idiot decided that we should play spin the bottle with parents in plain view. The mistletoe, they pointed out, was only right there and you would have to sneak beneath it. I declined but somehow got sucked in. And guess who I had the luck of getting stuck with.

If you thought Neil Anderson, yeah, you thought right. Rob and his girl had that luck. Sabrina just did it fast and with her eyes closed. The parents up to this time hadn't noticed us. But on my turn, hell, Anderson decided to make thing interesting. God damn hormones. As platonic as our relationship was, he grabbed me and kissed me hard as payback for his suit. There was cheering from the kids. I tried to protest as Anderson tried to play tonsil touchdown, but he wasn't listening. Now, of course, everyone was watching as 'that Anderson child' tried to make out with 'the Dalton girl'. I fixed the situation.

I finally freed myself, hauled off and slapped Anderson across his face to try to wipe that smirk off it. It didn't work and Theo screeching, "OO! Look at Charlie! I thought she was supposed to stay away from the boys!", didn't help either. My Dad was near rolling on the ground with laughter, Mr. Anderson was looking mortified. Needless to say, the game was broken up quickly and I was left pissed. Some of the locals were still making fun of me. They needed their asses kicked I decided. It took Anderson and Rob to keep me from jumping them.

"It wouldn't be a fair fight for them." Anderson had said with a laugh later as he loosed his tie. I was really ready to slap him again. I really was. It was getting late, but it seemed the adults were getting a little rowdy. The youngest kid there was Theo, and he was knocked out on the couch on a sugar crash. So the kids were getting a little out of line as well. Some of them were sipping from the wine when the they thought their parents weren't looking. Of course, there were those who preferred to take a tamer route: Rob and Katie had curled up in front of the fire. Anderson was sneaking drinks, Sabrina was being pressured into a shot, lord, I hoped she wouldn't do it, and I was staying out on the fringe activity. Some lead, some follow, I laugh. Makes sense doesn't it?

So, anyway, what happened was that Anderson and Sabrina wound up (ok, Anderson more than Sabrina), drunk, or slightly so. They were talking loudly.

"Ah, god dis friend, she call 'erself Chah-lie." Anderson slurred. "An' she's a gahl, ain't that funny?"

"Hm yeah! And we all do stuff together, like-

I clamped my hand over Sabrina's mouth, shit, I had no way of knowing what she was going to say. Anderson (I'm less severe about this as he was drunk) was trying to pull me away from Sabs. I kept swatting him away, again and again, as Sabrina began to complain of a hurting head. I moved her off to the quieter regions near the fire place. I fit her in a corner were there wasn't an amorous couple going at it. Ok, fine, making out, there are you happy? Aren't you wondering what Neil did? I know you are, but as I've mentioned earlier, I'm not one to give away the ending and then tell you the rest of the story.

So I was reclining with Sabrina near the warm fire. I was being lulled asleep by the thick warmth and was being deprived of my normally very sharp mind. Neil was wandering in this direction, he reeked of wine and maybe something a little stronger. I yawned and stretched. "You don't look so good." I said to him drowsily.

"I feel like shit." He mumbled.

"That would be your fault." I reminded him.

"I'm sleepy." Anderson was rocking on his feet and his eyes went unfocused. He pitched forward. Neil landed in an unceremonious heap across Sabrina and my laps. She woke with a start and sat up in a flash that sent her glasses sailing from her face. We couldn't move the unconscious Anderson off of us, it didn't help that he'd wrapped his arms around our waists and held them tight. We pushed and strained; Sabrina eventually freed herself. I, on the other hand, was stuck being Anderson's teddy bear. But I was a very unwilling teddy bear. All the same, I fell asleep after about twenty minutes.

At about one in the morning, (what a party!) my dad woke me up and, with Mr. Anderson's help, prized Neil off of me. They wanted to know what we'd been doing, and what the hell do you say to that? Sabs was able to validate my story, as her lap had suffered injury as well. So, my family was heading to the car when my mother said, "Why do you have that lampshade on your head?"

"Huh?" My dad replied, a hand flying up to feel the white lampshade on his head. Theo and I giggled. Dad grinned, spun around and jogged back to the house, tripping wildly as he did. He rang the bell and a confused Knox answered.

"I think this is yours." Charlie said, trying to hand the object over. Knox took it and squinted at it.

"What the hell happened?"

"I dunno."

Mom had gotten into the car already and was fast asleep. And Dad was looking a little too tipsy. I ran up to door and yelled, "Chris!"

Mrs. Overstreet appeared and, praise to the gods, she was sober. "I don't think my parents can drive." I said motioning to the men in their forties playing with a lampshade and my mother knocked out in the car.

"You're going to have to stay here, I guess. Can't you drive?"

"Not at night, and I don't know the highway well enough."

"I think you'd better stay here, go get your Mom and brother."

"Thanks Chris."

"Way I see it, this is saving you lives." She said.

I laughed and went to rouse the rest of my family. I was way too out of it when she led me to a room to crash for the night. I just knew I was handed a blanket and a pillow. Then the rest is history…

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

The next morning sun was knifing through neat curtains, reminding me where I was. I sat up, I was on the floor, and blinked. Things and shapes were emerging from the blinding light. It was a fairly spacious room, with an occupied bed and another two bodies on the floor besides my own. Whoa, that was really one helluva party. I tried to find my feet and I tripped on a body. It grunted and uncovered its head. It was Rob.

"Charlie?" he said, sounding perplexed, "What the hell?"

I had woken up everyone else. Sabrina was in the bed, the other body sat up and identified himself as Anderson. We all sort of gaped at each other before Rob asked, "WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING IN MY BEDROOM?" It wasn't going to be easy to explain…

So Rob's mom explained it to him. We were all gathered around the kitchen table and it was becoming more and more apparent that there was no food in the house. What with three teenaged vacuum cleaners hanging around, there was no way on earth we weren't hungry. The parents were only just emerging. Dad and Mr. Overstreet, both sporting lampshades, came from the living room. Mr. Meeks, sans his pants, (I don't want to know, I don't want to know! Happy place, happy place!) came from down the hall. Mr. Anderson, hair sticking straight up and looking bewildered, appeared from the basement. I was still in my rumpled uniform, as was Sabrina and Rob. Anderson had retained his pants, although he was mysteriously missing his shirt and when he did find it, all of the buttons had somehow popped off. There was also a red smear at the collar. He stared at it, dumfounded.

"What did I do…and why can't I remember it?" he cried.

"You, my friend, were very drunk." I said, putting an arm around his shoulders, "Very, very drunk."

Charlie: … Anderson: Oh my god… Rob: Oh this is too funny. Charlie: … Me: Are you guys ok? Charlie: You were supposed to embarrass Rob. Me: I did, you all woke up I his bedroom and freaked him out… Anderson: That is SO wrong. Me: I need to go get my camera, the look on your faces is just too good, a real Kodak moment! ((runs off)) Charlie: Should we kill her? Anderson: I don't think that's legal. Charlie: WHO CARES! Anderson: OO, touchy aren't we? Rob: Tee hee, that was just too funny… Me: Ok, hold still. ((snaps photo)) Charlie: You are a bad person, a very, very bad person. Anderson: Well… Charlie: What? Anderson: You are actually a very good kisser. Rob and Me: HA HA HA! Charlie: RAR! Me: Ok, ok, ok! We'll lay off already! Has anyone seen Danny and Sabrina? Charlie, Rob, Anderson, Sean and Geoff: Have you checked the closet? Me: Damn! Not again! ((runs over to the closet and throws it open)) They're not here! Danny and Sabrina: We weren't doing anything! Me: Yeah right! Like I trust you two! Danny: Oh, that hurts. Me: The puppy dog look isn't going to help you. Danny: ((puppy dog look)) Me: It's not working! Danny: Why not? Me: I'm immune to it! Nah, nah! Anderson: Oh, hangover… Me: Your own damn fault. Anderson: Oh shut up already, annoying little bitch. Me: What? Say that again, please, so everyone can hear you. Anderson: No thanks… Me: I need more couples votes! Please, please, please, it's so much easier if I don't have to decide who to pair up, you know?