Chapter 4
The group of four happy stoners made their way to the cafeteria, brutally murdering Chris Jericho's "Don't You Wish You Were Me" in the process.
"You guys need to shut the hell up," The Undertaker said, coming up behind the singing group. What a weird little foursome. Quartet. Whatever.
They all turned around to face him.
"How ya livin' Deadman?"
"Wazzup?"
"Whass crack-a-lackin' my nizzle?"
"I'm a great American."
"Just trying to mentally prepare for my match against Randy Orton," Taker replied, eyeing them all curiously. Are they high? he wondered. Even this dipshit JBL?
"Randy Orton? Ha!"
"We got his number tonight!"
"As soon as we find Heidenreich!"
"Heiden-roach!" Christian corrected.
"What's Heidenreich gonna do?" Taker asked.
"We're gonna make Heiden-roach..." Christian corrected.
"Screw that little bitch Randy Orton..." Booker continued.
"Right in the ass," Batista finished.
"Ewww! Cool!" JBL exclaimed.
"That's wicked and evil," Taker said, shaking his head. "But get it on film."
"Most definitely. We're making a movie."
"Calling it One Night In Randy."
"Starring Randy Orton and Heiden-roach."
"I'm a great American."
"Maybe you should call it One Night In Randy's Fanny," Taker laughed. He shook his head and started to walk away.
"Wait!"
Taker turned back around.
"We know we're not well-liked around here..."
"But, despite our lack of popularity, you helped us out..."
"By coming up with a new title for our movie..."
"For that, we would like to..."
"Extend."
"The."
"Peace."
"Pipe."
"The Peace Pipe?" Taker asked. He raised an eyebrow. "Y'all boys around here doing crack?"
"We don't really have a pipe."
"Cuz pipes are for crackheads."
"And we're definitely..."
"...not crackheads."
"But..."
"...we..."
"...have..."
"...this..."
JBL pulled out the blunt, held it out to Taker.
"Take it, Taker," they all whispered.
"Smoke me," the blunt chimed in. "Taker, take me!"
"What's in it?" Taker wanted to know.
"Chocolate syrup."
"Easter grass."
"Wrapped with brown paper bag."
"Delicious... Take a puff if you're tough."
"Ah, what the hell?" Taker grabbed it and started puffing away. He felt the immediate dizziness wash over him.
"Let's find Heiden-roach and get this show on the road!"
And the five of them headed for the cafeteria.