Title: The Basket
Pairing: McKay/Cadman
Spoilers: Through Duet
A/N: Not beta'd, just a silly little ficlet. It falls into my McKay/Cadman 'verse. Probably falls at the end of the timeline.


Rodney walked into his quarters after a long day of yelling at the incompetents who worked for him. All he wanted to do was sit back, relax, and watch some DVDs.

He setting his jacket down on his bed when he noticed a big basket on the table. He was almost to the table to look in the basket when the door open and Laura walked in.

"Rodney! You're home early; I – uh – wasn't expecting you home for another hour." Laura looked really nervous as she walked over to the table and stood between Rodney and the basket.

"Hi to you too. What's in the basket?" Rodney tried to look around Laura and into the basket but every time he moved, she moved. He moved left, she moved left. He moved right, she moved right. Back and forth.

This continued for about five minutes until Rodney wrapped his arms around Laura's waist, picked her up and moved her aside. Laura obviously wasn't expecting this move because she didn't make any counter moves. With Laura out of the way, Rodney walked up to the basket and looked in. He started sputtering when he saw the contents.

"Those are ORANGES and that's a LEMON, and oh-my-god is that a LIME!" Rodney backed away from the basket and stared at Laura in shock.

Laura walked up to Rodney and tried to put her hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it off. "It's not what you think Rodney, I was hoping to have them gone before you got home, you were never supposed know."

"Know what? That you're having a secret affair with CITRUS FRUIT?" Rodney started pacing back and fourth. He didn't really know how to feel about the fact his, whatever she was, had brought one of the things that could kill him into his home.

"Rodney, I'm sorry. The basket was here earlier when I came home. I only ran out for a few minutes to find a place to take it." Laura walked over to the bed and sat down.

"So you're telling me that it was just here when you got home? Citrus fruit just magically appeared in our quarters?" Rodney stopped pacing and stared at Laura. "Someone is trying kill me! We have to call John, and Carson, and Elizabeth. There is a killer on the loose!" Rodney was reaching up to tap his communication device when Laura stopped him.

"Rodney, I don't think someone is trying to kill you. There was a card, the basket was for me." Laura walked over to the table, picked up the card, and handed it to Rodney.

Rodney quickly scanned the card and set it back down. "It doesn't matter who it was for, it's still a death threat. I kiss you. People know I kiss you. You eat citrus, you kiss me, I die."

"Did you even notice who the basket was from?"

Rodney looked at the card again, this time reading the entire thing. When he got to the signature line he started fuming.

"That scheming little grey . . . I knew he didn't like me. I oughta – wait a second – he sent a basket of citrus fruit to YOU. He probably doesn't even know I'm allergic, well I don't know how he wouldn't know, but oh-my-god, he LIKES you!" Rodney set the card down and started laughing.

"Shut up Rodney! He does not like me. What are you? Twelve. We're friends. I think he just wanted to do something nice for me." Laura crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Rodney.

Rodney couldn't stop laughing. "I can just see it now, a nice summer wedding in gate room, the bride will wear white, and the groom, well the groom will be naked. The first Atlantean wedding. I'm sure it will be lovely. In fact, seeing as it will be the first human-asgard wedding I bet we could get a lot of brass to show up. Maybe even Supreme Commander Thor. I wonder how he is in –" Rodney was unable to finish his sentence because Laura tackled him.

Laura pinned Rodney to the ground by sitting on him. "He. Does. Not. Like. Me." She emphasized each word by poking Rodney in the chest. Rodney stopped laughing but he couldn't keep the smirk off his face.

"Okay, you just keep telling yourself that, and I'll just sit here, being crushed, and picture the beautiful children you two would produce."

Rodney could tell from the look on Laura's face that the absurdity of the situation was finally sinking in. She slumped down on him and started giggling. Rodney wrapped his arms around her and started laughing again.

They would have to deal with the crushing Asgard later but for now they both seemed content to lay on the floor of their room giggling and laughing about the situation.