IIIA, 3019, January 12

Today was a day of triumphs, mostly because I have discovered that some things do not change between worlds. Much of what I am skilled at at home, I learned today, is applicable here with a few modifications. Skills seem to travel across worlds; it is just the rules on how they work that change. But simply finding a bit of home here so far away is nice, especially since it has assured my place among the Riders. I don't think they have had the feminist revolution here yet, so my not turning out to be some token Mary has made me legitimate, in both their eyes and mine. Once again, I ramble. I apologize, dear reader, but my malevolent muse loves to wander.

The first thing I discovered was that meetings everywhere are boring. We all gathered around a rough-hewn rock table, laid our swords on the table, and sat down to listen to reports. The reports were rather dull, although Rider Number Seven did manage to spice up his presentation on the current size of the army with a pictorial graph with little orc heads.

Aside from learning that Nazgul cannot draw, I also learned more about our opposition the Ten Walkers (the good guys always get the lousy transportation) and the political situation of evil here. This came from the final report by Number Two, who was keeping an eye on some wannabe evil overlord called Saruman. Apparently he had been messing with the weather again. Although the rather wild snowstorm had not been directed at us (he is not that stupid), it seemed to be following the presumed path of the Ten Walkers. Saruman, who has given some kind of allegiance to Lord S., is going to be in deep troll doodoo for trying to double cross him. But he blundered and gave us confirmation on where the elusive good guys are. The storm seems to have forced them to take a different road, one that we have many allies on. Number Four was assigned to contact them and on that happy note the meeting was adjourned.

We had a light lunch on the terrace and then headed to the stables. While the other Riders got their beasts, Angmar introduced me to mine. In keeping with the whole one-female thing, I was assigned the only female fell beast. She was the mother of all of the other beasts and had never been ridden, only breed. Angmar was not sure I could handle her, but I soon showed him wrong.

One of the reasons she had given the Nine so much trouble was probably due to the fact that they had never given her a proper name, except derogatory ones. Every animal responds better if it has its own name. Even that oaf Hagrid has a name.

"What do you call those death flowers you gave me the other day in Black Speech?" I abruptly asked as we all watched from the pen gate while Number Eight attempted to catch my mount for me.

"Matulul. Why?" Angmar replied without taking his eyes off of Eight and my fell beast. "Don't let her get past you!" he yelled at the frustrated Eight.

"You'll see." I nonchalantly climbed under the gate and walked toward the winged animal.

"What do you think you are doing, woman? That beast will chew you in two!" He moved to come restrain me, but Two held him back and said, "Wait. Let's see what she has in mind."

"I know what I'm doing," I threw back over my shoulder. I took the harness from Eight and told him to get out of the pen. Turning back to the fell beast, I looked her in the eye and bowed. From what I had seen of the breed, fell beasts did not seem that different from hippogriffs. I figured the same tricks might work on them as well.

The beast immediately stopped her raving, puzzled. Then, slowly she returned the gesture, bowing as best a fell beast can bow. I straightened and walked toward her.

"How would you like a name?"

She blinked at me.

"If I gave you a good and proper wicked name, would you be my fell beast?"

She blinked again.

"What do you think of 'Matulul'?"

At this she lowered her head and allowed me to bridle her. When the harnessing was finished, I leapt on her and away we soared. When we finally came back down, all of the Riders had gathered around to watch. My handling of Mattie, as I decided to nicknamed, had the Riders all abuzz and I knew would go a long way with making me 'one of the guys'. However, as I was unbridling her, I managed to catch a snippet of their conversation.

"So all that beauty isn't gone to waste...there is power in her after all...I wonder what else she can do..." This all made me rather uneasy, for I was still discovering the rules that governed this world and did not know if my other powers, namely magic would work here. I hadn't said anything for fear that it would make me expendable, but I hadn't tried anything for fear that I would discover I had become a squint. Mattie caught onto my unease, and when Angmar approached, she narrowed her eyes at him.

"How did you know naming her would work?"

"Just because she likes me doesn't mean she has accepted you," I snapped, then shrugged to cover up my agitation. "We have similar proud beasts in my world. I am a bit of an expert on dark creatures back home." I gave Matulul one last pat and headed out of the pen, "See you later girl."

Since they had thought it would take until dinner to teach me to ride and it was barely mid-afternoon, there was nothing else planned. I was still agitated when we got back to the tack shed, so I decided to give Mattie's harness a good rubbing. Number Two got me some saddle soap and I started in on it. The labor helped me push it all to the back of my mind and soon I was laughing at the other Rider's animal stories. I even shared some of my own. The favorite was by far the time I gave my mudblood-loving cousin a Jack-in-the-Box I had rigged with a Blast-ended Skrewt for his tenth birthday. They were still laughing when we headed to dinner. Such was my first triumph.

oooooooooooooo

A further triumph o the day is I have discovered that I can still do magic here. When I had first applied, it had not even crossed my mind that I would be without a wand once I got here. (In my world, a witch must have her wand to do controlled magic.) As can be expected, I was not allowed to keep my wand when I was sent to Azkaban, and Angmar and his fellow riders of course had no clue that I would need it. Not having it, I feared for a short time, would make my job performance disappointing to Lord S. But I am perfectly evil without it, so I decided not to say anything until I could figure something out.

How did I figure out my powers had come with me? Since I did not have my wand and the words and wands go together in all of the magic I know, I did not go around spouting spells, especially because I had not seen anyone else do that. I was not quite sure how magic worked in this world.

But at fell beast lessons today, Number Six was having particular difficulty with his mount. Stupid thing kept screaming. The exasperated Six screamed something back, and the poor thing lost its voice. It tried to scream but nothing could come out. This seemed to be a common occurrence because the other Riders kept teasing Six of hexing the brains out of his beast. I, on the other hand, almost fell off of Matulul.

We kept riding like nothing had happened, but it got me to thinking. Could I do magic here without my wand? Or was that just for people of this world? Later, I had a chance to find out. After dinner, this particular orc was really getting on my nerves. He had the whiniest voice and was most incompetent. Of course, all minions possess a certain degree of incompetence but this shriveled mongrel was definitely last in line to get brains.

As a quick side note, I am having some doubts as to the purpose of Lord S.'s campaign. My Lord V. was evil for the sake of bettering the wizarding world, but Lord S. seems to be evil simply to be evil. While there is a certain pleasure to be found in evil, I am uncertain as to whether or not that should be the only reason for evilness. Lord S. claims to have purified the elves in his orcs, but this one particular orc is doing his best to prove his master otherwise.

But that must be contemplated later, back to my story. Turtz, as he was so aptly named, had just tripped on my hem for the fiftieth time that day. When I had arrived in Middle Earth, I had been given a completely new wardrobe. (Azkaban stripes just would not do; they inspire no fear.) Tonight, I happened to be wearing Angmar's favorite jet-black satin dinner gown with warg fur trim. The twerp's feet were well on their way to wearing all of the hair off the trim. And last time I checked 'Verse Girl, torn leather trim was not coming into style anytime soon.

Point of all this being my dress was not the only thing being worn thin; my patience had had it. Without thinking, I spun around, pointed my finger at him, and shrieked my favorite curse for nincompoops (probably because it was invented by my nincompoop cousin):

"Arachnus Appendigius!"

Immediately, the orc's arms and legs disappeared and were replaced by eight spindly spider legs. Turtz squealed in fright and scuttled down the corridor as best he could with his new appendages. I did just the opposite; I stood there in shock. Then, shaking my head, I realized what had happened and would have jumped hysterically for joy had I not been a lady of evil trained in the ways of a true Overlord. So my magic had come with me even if my wand hadn't.

'I can do magic without my wand.' I thought. ' I have to tell Angmar!' I gathered up my skirts and raced off to find him.

He was on a balcony near the top of Barad-dur, looking broodingly out over the plateau, no doubt contemplating the situation of our dark forces. Slightly turned toward the door, his profile was cut out against black of Mount Doom in the distance. Had I been less excited, I probably would have taken a moment to swoon over his dark features.

"Guess what?!?!" I blurted out.

It was several moments before he turned. As I came closer, I could see he looked drawn, well, more drawn than usual. Being undead tends to have that effect on people. No, this was a drawness from the weariness of contemplation and campaigning. But my undead beauty pulled him out of it, for when he turned and saw me, the tiredness lifted and he asked, "What?"

"I can do magic like you can. Well, I don't know if it is exactly the same 'cause my spells are from my world and aren't in Black Speech, but..."

"Wait." he interrupted confusedly. "Where did you learn this magic?"

"You didn't think I was in prison just for thinking evil thoughts, did you? In my world a lucky few are born with the ability to do magic naturally, but we generally have to have a wand to do controlled magic. I was actually in prison for using what some people in my world consider the worst of spells to torture an enemy couple. But they were the enemy and we were at war, so I don't see what the problem was. But that is a different story. Anyway, what happened today during training with Six's fell beast got me thinking. That maybe, if you could do magic without a wand, so could I, even though I am from another world and all." I was speed talking, I was so excited. "I didn't get a chance to try it out because we've been so busy with training and everything until just right now, which was actually kind of an accident.'

Angmar nodded slowly, as if trying his best to understand my rambling.

I plunged ahead. "I am afraid that one of your orcs no longer has his own arms and legs." At response of a slightly raised eyebrow, I realized I might want to explain that. "It's like this...he was getting on my nerves, tripping all over my dress and being such a nuisance. I couldn't think of anything else to do, so I yelled a curse at him and replaced his arms and legs with...uhm...spider legs. Please don't be mad, but he was rather useless." I rushed to finish and finally breathed.

Angmar just agreed with me. "They all are, which is why they make good expendable minions. Now just exactly which of my prized soldiers did you curse?"

"Turtz." I grinned.

Angmar let out a guffaw. "I should thank you. That one is the bottom of the food chain, even for an orc. The tower gossips will have you turning his entire body into a spider by nightfall, but that is good. They need to learn to be subservient to you."

I was very much relieved by his reaction. I knew my magic ability would only endear me to him more, but I wasn't sure about the way I had used it. But he actually seemed to be enjoying the way it had come about.

"That was just what I needed to hear. I can't remember when hexing sounded this fun. We have had far too little spring-cleaning evil around here. I guess that is what happens when you have nine old bachelors running things. You are going to have to teach me some of your world's curses."

"All in good time," I assured him. I leaned into him and sighed. "Oh, so much excitement. First Mattie and now this. It makes me want to have a good, relaxing cuppa."

"What is a cuppa?" he replied seeming to think it was another kind of magic.

"You don't know what a cup of tea is? Deary me, I thought you were written by an English chap." I ignored his puzzled look at my last statement and went on. "Well, then. I shall have to introduce you to one of the best ways to relax in all the world." Saying this, I guided him away from the balcony railing. "Mmm...we are going to need some chairs and a little table too."

"I can have..."

"No, no, no. I have it all under control." Then, saying the right words, I conjured up two comfy leather chairs with a small table in between them. With one more spell, a tea setting for two complete with little silver spoons appeared on the table. My last move was to add steaming tea into the teapot and sugar cubes into the sugar bowl.

Angmar stared at me. "Is this all you can do?"

"No, this is rather simple. There are other spells for defense and fighting, some that are quite powerful and ugly. More on that later. Now we drink." I poured tea in the two cups, along with the fixings, and handed one to Angmar.

He held the dainty cup and saucer gingerly. His wary attitude toward such a small, albeit unusual smelling drink made him all the more endearing. I could not keep from teasing, "Don't worry...I won't tell anyone you drank something this cute."

In return, I received a dour look. "I was not worried about my eviloverlordship. I was just contemplating the odds that you slipped a love potion in here." Before I give a retort, Angmar took a sip and leaned back in his chair. "I think I am going to like this kind of magic."

And that was how the day ended, complete with two triumphs. We pulled our chairs to look out over the balcony and talked and sipped our tea. Oh, if only I could swoon, but now that I have Lord S.'s ring, I am half-dead and I don't know if we powerful, not-all-dead can do that.

oooooooooooooo

INMH—big batch of brownies for you. Yes, Erika is from Underworld.

Nobody for the death flowers? If I remember my fandoms correctly, it is from Babylon 5. I guess I will have to eat the second batch all by myself. :-P

Now, make my day and review, or I will have Angmar shall kidnap you to Arakis.