Throwing Away II
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
A/N: 'Throwing Away' was intended to be an one-shot. But by popular demand (I love to say this! So many reviews!) I am writing to make it a multipart (probably one more chap after this one) story. Hope you like it.
Naruto looked at the Hokage monument. Today was the announcement of the finalization of Tsunade and the council's decision of Sasuke being Rokudaime Hokage and his inauguration date. There would be a transition period during which Sasuke would be gaining more and more duties and power. Once that period ends, Tsunade would step down.
Naruto remembered all his proclamations of being the best Hokage ever. Everything was coming back; all his past, his fights, his struggles; everything. He did not know why. He had long accepted his fate, his defeat. He had given up long ago. Then why? Probably for the fact that during her speech Tsunade never looked at him or because, along with everyone, Sakura was cheering enthusiastically also. He shook his head. No, that was not true. He looked back at the recent days.
'Shizune…'
It was her. Somehow, she had managed to bring some of his old self back to him. Not the I-will-protect-the-village-and-be-happy-all-the-time self, but more of the emotional self.
He was being used all his life. Standing here, now, he realized the council politics clearly. He realized why he could not bring himself to hate Sasuke. Sasuke was a puppet too, just like him. It was not Sasuke who was being Hokage, it was the council who was gaining power. Sasuke was just like a banner which would provide them the civil support. They killed two birds at the same time; by making Uchiha the Hokage, the got the support of the populace and by demoting him they got complete control over him, the demon and the weapon of Konoha.
Naruto sighed; his mind going back to Shizune, again. He did not have any other woman this close to him in his life. His relationship with Sakura was an ambiguous one and never reached to this state. Looking back at that night or rather the following morning, Shizune had left without a word. He also, did not make a fuss about it. But he had wanted to ask her to stay behind, even if just for the morning but had decided against that. She had been, after all, drunk when all that happened; so that incident did not probably mean anything to her. But he wanted to ask.
Somewhere in there, the desire of being loved was still left in his heart.
He had thought that it was nearly impossible for him being loved again, but Shizune proved that wrong. He just could not forget Shizune and the intimacy they had that night. She had given him some of his hope back. She had given him a feeling of having a family, once again. Over the next couple of moths they had grew closer and closer. More and more time was spent together and he was drawn into the relationship more. But he knew that was also temporary. She made that clear a long time ago.
It was one of those mornings when Shizune had kept his request to stay with him for a little more time. Her head was resting on his chest while he was stroking her bare back. It were mornings of this type when Naruto liked to imagine himself being the happiest man of the earth, no matter how much pain it will bring later.
"I am using you, Naruto." Her soft whisper reached his ears.
He was mildly surprised by her sudden declaration but he was not caught off guard.
"I am using you for my own needs," she continued to confess.
"So when are you planning to dump me, Shizune-chan?" He asked her with a little playfulness is his voice.
"I am serious, Naruto," she added while looking at his face from her position.
"Me too."
She again rested her head on his chest. His stroking hand never left her back.
"You are not bothered?" she inquired.
"I am used to the feeling of being used," he answered. After a brief silence he continued, "I had a family, Shizune-chan. I had a life. But now, all I have are mission-briefings. I am always used, Shizune-chan." He paused again. Embracing her tightly, he flipped their bodies so that her body was beneath him, causing her to moan. He brought his lips to her ears and whispered.
"At least you are honest."
Naruto smiled slightly. It was very unlikely that her feeling had changed over time. Even if they had, she deserved better than him. He made a decision.
He needed a fresh start.
"The time has come," declared a man named Danzou, the leader of ROOTS ANBU devision.
"Preparations are complete. The transition has begun. We have the best chance during this period of power shifting. All we need is a valid reason for the uprising. That will get up some support from the civilians and some of the shinobi population," added someone.
"I think we have a valid reason. I have a treaty going with the Hyuga. They also do not support the fact that an Uchiha is going to be Hokage. Our main agenda will be about the treason of Uchiha Sasuke. I learned from Hiashi about the trial of Uzumaki, which is the only thing that is used by the council to prove Uchiha's innocence."
"We have discussed this before, Danzou. Get to the point."
"We overlooked one main point. That is, the trial was based on one and only one witness. Only that witness knows the whole story. She also holds a top position in the current system. Should we able to break her, not only it will give us a reason but also council's bias and shadowy business will be revealed. Demon vessel or not, Uzumaki has gained some popularity among some shinobi."
"Who is she?"
"Godaime's personal apprentice and head of Konoha's medical facility; Haruno Sakura."
Shizune was lying on Naruto's bed waiting for his return. She knew Naruto would be upset today and she wanted to comfort him. After the meeting, when she arrived at his apartment, he was not there yet. So she waited for him. Why she was doing this she did not quite understand. She did not plan on getting too involved with him. She started this for her own selfish needs. She knew that Sakura still had feelings for Naruto and she wanted to give Sakura her own treatment by taking Naruto from her. But somehow, as time passed, things had changed and she was not sure now. Even if Naruto knew that she was using him, she was sure that something was not right. It was her, who did not understand whether she was using him or she needed him.
He had become a part of her barren life and she did not want to throw that away.
He once told her that he needed a family and found it in her, once again. For some reason, she felt content being in his family. It had been her need for a family too, she suspected, that triggered her feelings. And here she was, waiting for him, in his bed. She understood now, she would be there for him for a long time, may be rest of her life. And he would be there drawing her in, always. After all, Uzumaki Naruto was known for never giving up. She remembered there second meeting clearly. It had been one week since her little 'escapade' with Naruto.
Shizune found herself at the bar yet again, needing a drink badly. The reason being another 'conversation' with Haruno Sakura. She was on her second bottle and starting to fill a bit dizzy when she heard the voice.
"You are at it again, Shizune-chan," Naruto stated taking a seat beside hers.
Shizune eyed Naruto for a second and continued to sip her sake without any answer. Naruto ordered his sake and looked at her. She seemed to be in a bitter mood.
"You OK, Shizune-chan?"
She gripped her cup tightly, gritting her teeth. She wanted to be left alone right now and somehow this man kept reminding her of Sakura. On top of that, her mind kept going back to that night and she did not want to deal with that right now.
"You seem awfully concerned about me today," Shizune spat, "Your sweet Sakura-chan did not give you enough today?" her bitter mood showing clearly.
Naruto snorted. She sure knew how to shut people up. Then again, he was Uzumaki Naruto after all.
"She does not give me anything, except orders, that is," Naruto countered. "Another argument?"
Shizune was really getting irritated by now. She was here to forget things, not to be reminded. She ignored the second question and chose to close the topic by a single jab.
"She does not give anything, huh? So that's why you are here, to pick up drunken women and take advantage of them? What are you waiting for now? For me to get drunk again?"
She was right on target this time. Naruto just stared at her for sometime. He downed his cup and paid the bill. He looked at her once again. She was clearly not drunk this time.
"You know, Shizune-chan, I wanted to ask you if that night held any meaning to you." Naruto stood up. "Thanks for the answer."
Shizune stared at the exit of the bar where Naruto disappeared.
It was one hour after he got back from the bar when Naruto heard a knock at his front door. He opened it to find Shizune standing outside. She was a bit intoxicated but still had enough control. Before he could ask anything, she pushed him inside against a wall and pressed her lips against his. Naruto became confused after the passionate kiss, but Shizune cleared that up.
"This time, I want to remember everything," she said, her hands still cupping his face.
Gripping her hair by one hand, he pulled her close for another kiss. His other hand ripped the kimono off her body.
Together, they entered into the wild night.
After that, many times they had found themselves at each other door. Many nights had became wild. The obvious age difference between them did not seem to faze Naruto a bit. Before this, she never had any serious romantic or sexual relationships with anyone, mostly due to the fact that she spent most of her youth with Tsunade, away from the village and living a life of a wanderer and she was already close to thirty when she returned to Konoha. But she found her lost times in Naruto as he continued to remind her of her womanhood that she thought she had left behind. Shizune let out a small laugh. She was a medic and all that, but up till now, she had not realized the most vital thing about Naruto.
He was contagious. Once you get a test of him, you are addicted forever.
Her musings were cut short by the sound of the door opening. Naruto came in and sat on the couch looking tired. Shizune rose from his bed and went over to him. Settling herself beside him, she slowly started rubbing his shoulder. He did not look at her, neither did he respond.
"Naruto, we all knew this would happen. Don't let it get you," she cupped his face turning it towards her.
"It's hard, Shizune-chan," he whispered. "It's hard to live on when you don't have anything to live for. It's hard when you don't have anyone to go to."
He sounded broken and defeated. Shizune knew he needed help badly. He needed her badly.
"That's not true. You are not alone, Naruto." She had to tell him, now. She had to tell him before he is totally lost.
"You…" she paused for a second. She slid into his lap and kissed him tenderly.
"You have me, Naruto" she whispered.
Naruto looked at her with surprise and shock. There was raw emotion in her eyes. He could see the truth of the statement. And he was scared. She never said anything to him that may raise his hope towards a stable relationship between them, not even in an ambiguous manner. Then, why now? Why after he had made his decision? Why did she have to come after it was too late?
"Shizune-chan, you … why … Oh God!" his voice is barely whisper now. "I am sorry Shizune-chan, I am so sorry…"
"Naruto, what's wrong? Why…" she was rubbing his cheek with her hand. He looked away from her and stilled himself.
"I resigned, Shizune-chan".
She froze. He felt her body stiffen. She was still embracing him. It took her some time to recover her voice.
"What will you do now?" she did not ask him why.
He closed his eyes. "I…I am leaving the village, tomorrow morning. Obaa-chan already gave clearance," he replied, his eyes still closed.
She could not believe it. He had done an incredibly stupid thing and she was late to stop him, too late. She did not understand why this had to happen now, after she had sorted out her feelings. Just when she was about to settle down, this idiot had to do something this incredulous. Just when she had picked herself up, he had to scatter everything again.
His eyes closed, he felt her hands tighten their grip for a second and then leave his face; he felt her leaving his side. He knew he screwed up yet again. He had got his second chance and he had thrown it away again. He heard the door open.
"I wanted to give you your family, Naruto; I wanted to start our own family!" she was sobbing, "and you threw it away."
He heard the door close. He brought his hands to cover his face.
He was useless again.
Tsunade sat in her office recollecting her conversation with Naruto. She let out a defeated sigh. Her mind went back to an earlier meeting with the council.
"Your apprentice, Haruno Sakura, is getting out of hand, Tsunade."
Tsunade held a look that conveyed her irritation clearly. "No, she is not."
"You know clearly, Tsunade, if the Hyuga are to get the true story out of her, it will create a huge mess. There alliance with ROOTS clearly indicates so. Today, she was approached by several Hyuga members. We can not let that happen."
"This is a time of transition. Any kind of uprising has to be stopped by all means, Tsunade. You have to control her more."
She closed her eyes and leaned back into her seat. She had feared this for so long. She did not want to do this but Naruto's decision had left her with no choice. She was well aware of Sakura's feelings towards Naruto. This news will not go well with her and if she were to break… She sighed and called her personal messenger.
"Get Haruno Sakura to me."
She was the Hokage after all. She would do what had to be done.
It was late afternoon when a figure knocked on a wooden door before entering the cabin.
"We got a bird from Konoha. It's about Uzumaki," a male voice spoke.
No response was heard as the voice continued.
"He will be leaving tomorrow morning." He delivered a small scroll.
"Prepare to leave in half an hour," the occupant of the room spoke, "We have to intercept him before he goes too far. Be prepared for battle."
As the messenger was retreating, he heard once more.
"Kill the bird."
"Tsunade-shishou, you summoned me?" Sakura asked standing in front of the Godaime.
Tsunade handed her a scroll and a package. Sakura opened the scroll and stared at it.
"Welcome to ANBU, Sakura."
Shizune stared at the setting sun. Naruto might have thrown away his last chance but she had hers left. Then again, all she had was a lucky bird.
End A/N : There seems to be a big fuss about answering the reviews. So I would say this: My heartfelt thanks to all of you who reviewed. I really appreciate that. Please keep the reviews coming, because those are my inspiration! See you in the next (and probably final) chapter.