Chapter 9 – Compromises and Coffee Grinds

Shannon sat in the dark apartment, keys jangling, a sleepy Jake lying on the floor at the end. Andy really had been so nice! He was so laid back at first… but Shannon realized now that it had just been a show.

She had been sitting here since eleven, and now it was close to midnight. Where was he? Shannon's fingers traced the bruise on her shoulder. In some sick, twisted way, she was oddly proud of it- now she would be taken seriously. She wondered what Andy was doing right now – was he partying it up with a bunch of playboy bunnies, doing so many shots he couldn't count? Or was he wallowing in self-pity, watching reruns, vodka held in appropriate hand? No matter what he was doing, Shannon was sure it had something to do with alcohol. But no big deal, it was only, you know, their friggin' wedding night.

More importantly, where was Boone? Probably off with the so cute (!) Emily, being all polite and lovesick over dinner. Ick. How could Boone even claim to be in love with Emily? He was supposed to be in love with her! But she wasn't jealous, no, not jealous at all.

Shannon wondered what Boone's reaction would be when he found her there. He'd probably be upset at first, but then he would – oh shit, this wasn't how it was supposed to be! She was supposed to knock on his door, and he would see her forlorn expression and let her in, no questions asked. Then he'd hug her and tell her he loved her and she deserved so much better… who the fuck had she been kidding?

Suddenly, Jake stirred. Shannon heard a key fumbling with the lock, and two (two!) voices.

"Wanna come in?" He was saying. Say no, say no! Emily giggled.

"Of course!" More giggling. Oh shit, they were probably making out now.

"Let me open the door!" He said good-naturedly.

"Yeah, sorry!" What was he going to say? The door opened and Shannon sat up. Jake stood up, wagging his tail and making excited- dog noises. "Well, hewo, liddle puppy!" Stupid Emily. Shannon noticed with triumph that Jake didn't seem to like Emily very much. They still didn't see her, he hadn't turned on the lights yet. Oh, gross! They were kissing again! This was so fucking awkward. Shannon coughed.

"What was that!" said Emily. He turned on the light and looked at her – his expression purely disgusted. It made Shannon want to shrivel up and die. "Shannon! Wow! I didn't expect to see you here! Gave me quite a fright! What are you… why are you here!" Emily squealed.

"Shannon, what are you doing here?" He asked, glaring. She looked at the floor.

"Um…"

"How did you get in?" Shannon held up the key weakly. "You took my keys?" Oh, how stupid was he?

"No, you gave them to me."

"Oh." He said. "You were supposed to give them back!"

"What!" Said Emily, confused.

"You never told me to give them back!"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Why would it be – "

"Well, after we…. After we…"

"What is going on!" Exclaimed Emily, confused. "After you what?"

"Emily, I –"

"Don't tell her!" Shannon yelled.

"Don't tell me what?" Said Emily suspiciously. Shannon could tell that she was getting annoyed by the lack of exclamation points in her sentence.

"Never mind." Said Boone. "Shannon, why did you come?"

"It was Andy, he…"

"Wasn't tonight your wedding night?"

"Yes! I told him I didn't want to have sex because he was so drunk and he hit me!" This wasn't even a lie. "He's always so drunk…"

"Oh, my god!" Exclaimed Emily.

"So I left him, and I didn't want to go stay with your mother because I hate your mother, so I came here!" She cried.

"Wait," said Emily. "Your mother? What do you mean?"

"Shannon and I are step-siblings," said Boone. "Her dad married my mom and her dad is dead now."

"Oh." Emily said. "You could have told me that before."

"So can I stay?"

"I guess," said Boone, looking apologetically at Emily. Shannon headed towards his bedroom.

"Um," said Boone, "You're going to have to sleep on the couch."

"Okay! You know what!" Emily suddenly squealed, "Can somebody please tell me what's going on! I am just so confused, but if it's what I'm thinking, that is just – ew, but I know, it's not that because you're too normal, so I'm not right, right?" Emily blabbered, looking at them. Each of their expressions were extremely guilty.

"Emily – " Started Boone.

"It is true! That's gross! I don't want to talk to you!"

"I can explain –"

"I'm just going to go now!" Emily backed away warily, as if she was afraid of them.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Shannon suddenly said. "Are you scared of us?"

"This is like 'Cruel Intentions' or some – "

"Are you honestly about to make a movie reference right now?" Shannon said disbelievingly.

"You are such a Kathryn!"

"You're really stupid, you know that?" Said Shannon.

"At least I'm not insectual!"

"Insectual? What the fuck does that – "

"Incestual! Whatever!" Emily started crying.

"Emily, just – "

"Shut up, Boone! I'm leaving!" And with that, she slammed the door behind her.

"I'm sorry." Said Shannon in a little voice.

"It's okay." He said through gritted teeth.

"Do you think she'll tell anyone?"

"All that matters is what happens to you, huh?"

"It's true what I said, you know, about Andy."

"Why wouldn't it be true?" Right, he didn't know she had lied about Jean. "Shannon, you really should be more careful with – "

"I don't want to talk about it." She said firmly. "Do you want to get some sheets for the sofa bed for me?"

"No, it's fine, you can stay with me."

"Okay."

"Okay." Suddenly, something in Shannon's mind clicked. "Boone, we're getting too old for this. We can't - I mean, we've got to stop messing around!" Sure, it was fun to make out and stuff, but if it got anymore serious, their feelings would get too serious. Like they hadn't already.

"Yeah." He said. Oh god, the look he had in his eyes was heartbreaking. He really had it bad. And Shannon didn't quite understand how anyone could truly believe she was that special. But somehow, she knew that he did, and he probably wouldn't ever stop. Now Shannon had a power – maybe she had been a little bit in love with him in July, maybe she had been in love ten minutes ago, but she wasn't anymore, she claimed, and swore to herself that she never would be again.

"I mean, we were just messing around, right?" She said, but she was really just trying to convince herself that it hadn't been anything more.

"Yeah." He said, looking thoroughly unconvinced.

"It's not like we're in love."

"No!" He said quickly, too quickly. He was in love, but she wasn't. And she could totally use that to her advantage. "I guess I'll just set up the couch bed, then?"

"Yeah." She sighed. It wasn't supposed to be this way.

Boone and his damn coffee grinder woke up Shannon the next morning at the ungodly hour of 7:30 AM. She rolled out of bed and walked into the kitchen, reached over him arm, and shut off the grinder.

"What the fuck?" He said.

"I'm trying to sleep!"

"I'm trying to make coffee!"

"Jesus!" She exclaimed.

"Oh my god, this is so horrible!" He said sarcastically.

"Shut the hell up!"

"Shannon, you are pissing me off! I have class in an hour, and you can't just come in like you own the place and – "

"I can do whatever I want." They were interrupted by the condescending ding of the doorbell.

"I'll get that," Said Boone, headed for the door. Shannon stood in the kitchen, and, indifferent to who it was, probably a Jehovah Witness or whatever, poured herself a glass of orange juice.

"Hi," she heard Boone say.

"Um, I'm looking for Shannon." Said a guy. Andy! Fuck!

"Are you Andy, by any chance?"

"Yeah… look dude, you probably hate me, but – "

"Shannon's not here."

"Oh." Screw Boone for assuming her reaction!

"I'm here. Jesus, Boone, let me speak for myself, would you? I want to speak with Andy alone."

"Okay," he said.

Shannon was suddenly very aware that her hair was a mess and that she was clad in only a t-shirt and boy shorts. "Look Andy," she said emphatically. "I want to –"

"Shannon, just listen to me, please! I was up all night because I felt so guilty for what I did! It was inexcusable, and I swear it'll never happen again."

"You were drunk."

"I love you, Shannon!"

"You're always drunk. You always want to do it when I don't want to you, you – "

"It won't happen again!"

"I don't think you love me at all, Andy. I think you love, you know fucking me, but I don't think you like anything else."

"That's not – "

"I think you should give me some time, Andy."

"But –"

"I'll see you." She said icily, closing the door.

Two days later, on Wednesday, Andy came back, unannounced. That was when Boone paid him to leave.

"So," said Shannon after he left. "What did he say?"

"He said that he loved you and he wasn't going to take the money because it wasn't 'honorable'. I had to beg him to take it."

"Did he sound guilty?"

"Yeah." Sighed Boone. "But you have to remember, he hit you. Don't forgive him, Shannon."

"I wasn't going to!" She snapped.

When Shannon went to check the mail on Friday, there was an envelope from Andy. In it was a check for 20 thousand dollars. A note fluttered from the envelope, and in sloppy, drunken letters, it read, "I am fucking scum. Couldn't take the $."

Shannon could barely contain herself from running through the house waving the check in Boone's face. She practically skipped inside, and exclaimed, "I'm going to buy an apartment!" to a perplexed looking Boone, who was eating cereal in the kitchen. She sat down, carefully hiding the check in her pocket. "Or maybe Anna and I will be roommates!" Ha. It would be highly amusing to invite Anna over to talk about it while he was in class. She imagined the look on Boone's face when he saw her. Yes, that would make her day just a little.