Konnichiwa Minnasan!!!
Sorry for the long wait but last week was ultra busy and don't even ask me about the weekend. Now then...hmmm...I'm kinda' feeling strange today and not even in a writing mood really but at the same time I realy want to do something special with my story. I don't know why but somewhere along the line this stopped feeling like a fanfiction and began to feel more like my own story. Silly isn't it...I'm just kinda' weird like that...
I'm so happy that I hit 300 reviews and me, being so thickheaded, forgot to mention anything when I hit 200, oh eons ago. "BAKA, BAKA,..." :smacks self repeatedly:
You guys are probably thinking that Sesshy's out of character right? Sorry about that. I concentrated so much in portraying him as a meanie in the beginning that I wanted to show the effects of Rin's association with him and it looks like he did a personallity flip-flop. I know you probably thought that his reason for trying to commit suicide was somewhat anti-climactic but there's more the story that I'm going put in this chapter and I just might add a few twists.
Don't worry about Sesshoumaru turning into a mush pot of fuzzy sentiments. I won't let that happen. He's still the same old grouch, but he's slowly learning how to care about Rin, although I don't know about him and the rest of the world.
Enough ranting now.
Thanks to: evil squeede, Peanut Gallery-Alaska's Own, Yuki Haitani, dragoin's lair, The J-Man (:P I did the advertising, now you HAVE to update. :P), lyerial, Naoko2 (I agree that it is a little plain but I was planning on fleshing that out in this chapter. Thanks for the feed-back though it really means a lot), hm, wolfite, chandra16, Kerichi (yes, he is. I wouldn't want you to think that he's going soft for love of Rin now. Really, actually make me think a little bit of how it is between me and my sister :sigh: it's so hard being the youngest), New Fan (Good observation. Yes, he is offering her more, but the question is "will Rin accept it?" I plan on writing plenty more elements to the story, Hiten plays another part in the story as well. A very important one.), RosieB, Tsume Yamagata (I've noticed that too. No one is updating and I'm like "what gives?". I've said it once and I'll say again, I'm not THAT good but it makes me sooooooooo happy :hugs self: when I hear you say that. Thank you thank you thank you.), UgLyDaRkFaErIe547 (whew that name is fun to type and I like it lots. Thanks 'cause I was worried that I was doing a sucky job. Writing about the way they flirt is fun), aishiteru-inu (I can't say I went through the same kind of problem, it was more of an unreqited love thing for me, but I do understand the pain of being hurt by someone you love. I'm glad though that you were able make it through a bad situation and I thank you for feeling comfortable enough to tell me such a thing. It is true that beating something or someone up is terrific stress relief, but if you don't get the chance then you have to let it ebb away otherwise you wind up carrying a lot of pain. Hope you are feeling much better now and thank you for always reviewing and sharing your thoughts.), Haruya (Funny you should say that because the previous chapter was my longest yet. You sound just like me and don't worry about having too much free time because that's when some of the best memories are made), Moonglow gal, drake220 (it was fun to write and he was asking for it anyways.), Jade Summers (NO!!! Say it isn't so...No more Inu?!!! Don't worry, I know you'll find a way to watch it. There are few anime girls that I really like but my favorites are definitely Rin, Kagome, Yuya (from an awsome manga/anime called Samurai deeper Kyo), and Lum (from a really old anime called "Urusei Yatsura" by Rumiko Takahashi who is also the creator for Inuyasha), KitKat07 (meow puuuuuurrrrrrrrr I am one happy kitty right now and it's all because you are so kind. :sniffle: We really do think alike because just the day you updated and reviewed is the exact same day that I typed up my story. Makes me sooooo happy :more purring: You know what they say, great minds think alike and I feel like your greatness is rubbing off on me. :purring to the tenth power: I'm so happy that you like this story and so happy that we have some of the same interests :coughcoughsess/rincoughcough: Anyhoo, here's a sunbeam smile for you and I'll send you the medical bill :P cause I'm sure my face is gonna split in half from this big 'ol smile :purring until she passes out form happiness:.), and thanks to Mitsuki-kun (I was wondering where you were but I'm glad to see that you haven't totally lost interest in this weird fic of mine. Thanks for correcting me, it helps me to keep up with my Japanese even though I'm sure this chapter has mistakes as well. Doomo Arigatoo. :hope I said it right, I'm so rusty: Oh, and Naraku is more of a minor character in this story -he's Rin's boss by the way, y'know "Mr. Kagewaki". I actually kinda' like him for being so completely evil and opted to make Kagura the main bad guy 'cause it's more dramatic that way.), TinkerBell, choco-coco (Don't worry, Sesshy will get his time to shine, but he hasn't completely broken out of his shell yet. I don't really have a warm up, but if I want a chapter with some action in it I listen to fast paced music and romantic or dramatic chaps get calm music.), RangerDo'Urden (Awwww, I'm so proud to be your first. )
Special thanks to: Rikou Suiyou, thank you as always for helping me with my terrible grammar and constant whining. It makes me really happy to have someone that I can trust to do a good job on this story with regards to BETAing. Thank always for reviewing too. Love n' Peace.
Mumble, mumble, on to the fic. Oh, and aishiteru means "I love you." Nii-chan is an affectionate term for big brother.
Thread Bound
Chapter Thirteen
The Journey To Sanctuary
"I ask you then, mother," said the boy.
"Yes, my son."
"Suppose the bird decides to stay with the person and he begins to feel happy. Is that the end? If he chooses to be happy with what he has, then will the story end at last?"
"Perhaps, but alas my child, a bird is still an animal and there are those who will hunt him. Those who would hurt him. Those who would seek to possess him because he has found something that they have not."
"If that happens will they have to run? To run forever and ever...?"
"Sanctuary..."
"Sanctuary?"
"Yes, a sanctuary would have to be found. A place where others cannot follow. A place that may take lifetimes to find."
"Then is there no hope, mother? Will they never be happy because their time is so limited?"
"Silly boy, do you not know that time is a tapestry with threads that touch for eternity? The threads that bind things together are not so easily broken, not even by the passage of the centuries. If in this world or this time they can never properly connect, then they will wind ever tighter until they are so entangled that not even fate could pull them apart."
"I do not understand, mother."
"Humans aren't meant to know everything, but they can learn through their mistakes, same as with every animal moving across the face of the world. Sanctuary is a strong word because, in the end, that is where hearts of a like will always meet."
"So the human and the bird will always meet, mother?"
"Yes, for neither will ever forget the other."
"Sesshoumaru-sama..."
He stopped, feeling his kimono billow slightly before settling back against his tall frame. He didn't turn to face her because he knew very well that he would be lost to the sight of her soft curves..., her shining hair..., her full lips that were the only ones in his long life that smiled at him genuinely..., and those eyes that saw right through him—those soft brown eyes that had haunted him every night since he realized that she was a grown woman now.
"What do you want?" He could keep a monotone voice as long as he didn't look at her. Why was it that a human made him feel this way? Why couldn't it be one of his own kind?
It was so easy to pretend to be indifferent; at least it was until she circled those thin arms around him, something that he would have killed anyone else for doing, but not her. Never her.
"What do you want to tell me?"
"Sesshoumaru-sama." She was in front of him then, hands, those ever gentle, caring hands clasping the claws that he had used to spill a countless amount of blood, claws that had soothed and killed in the same breath. She pressed them firmly against her chest and caught his gaze, brown eyes turned fathomless in the torchlight, drawing him in.
"Aishiteru..., Sesshoumaru-sama."
He stopped breathing altogether.
Soft lips grazed his knuckles, her eyes never leaving his.
"Aishiteru, Sesshoumaru."
The sound of his name being spoken so informally caused the dead lump in his chest—the one that counted as a heart—to warm with something unfamiliar. It was as if a chapter in his life had come to a close while a new one began.
Sesshoumaru's eyes snapped open and he sat up swiftly, hand flying to his face to make sure that it was normal, that his nose wasn't as narrow as his counterpart's in the dream, that his ears weren't so pointed, and his nails weren't actually claws for tearing his prey apart.
Running a hand through hair that wasn't quite as long as the dream Sesshoumaru's had been, he blinked in the morning light and looked around in mild surprise. He was in his room, and a frown crawled across his handsome features as he tried to recall getting there in the first place.
A brief image of Rin entered his cloudy thoughts, saying something about going inside and the lingering impression of her soft hair touching his arm as she helped him out of the car, then removed the house keys from his pocket.
A slight sting on his cheek reminded him of his half-conscious ruminations concerning the shape of her softly rounded bottom and subsequent satisfaction at discovering that it was indeed as soft as it looked, followed by a swift slap from his new housemate.
I had to have been really tired to actually act on the attraction I feel toward her, he thought ruefully, rubbing his sore cheek. It came as a surprise how easily he admitted to being attracted to the girl. Young Woman, he corrected himself, sliding his feet over the edge of the bed and making his way to the bathroom.
"Doesn't matter," he muttered, turning the faucet on after checking to make sure there weren't any stripes or crescent moons on his face. "I doubt suicidal men who are ten years her senior, are her type." Again a mild surprise at how easily he admitted that he wanted her to like him back in the same way he cared for her. Then again, he had been aware for some time that she found him attractive and hoped that it wasn't going to be the same with her as it had been with a good number of other girls. Stupid thought. Comparing Rin with those fools is like comparing a rose to weeds or a butterfly to common moths.
Splashing water on his face, he took a moment to close his eyes and think about his dream. Why did it feel as if the Sesshoumaru in his dream and the girl who loved him so much...was a memory instead of something fanciful? He had gotten the idea for his current story from those dreams, intending to make a semi-fictional autobiography about his life, but the more he wrote the more he felt as if everything in the book had happed to him or someone just like him.
He frowned for the second time that morning. Speaking of books... He still hadn't told Rin that he was the author of her favorite books. There wasn't really a reason to keep it a secret anymore because he was certain that she no longer hated him; but...how would she react? Would she get mad? Would she withdraw from him? He had already worked so hard to get her to agree to stay with him. I should just surprise her when I publish this book.
"I would be honored to illustrate the cover of one of his books." He remembered the bright smile on her face as she said that and the corners of his own mouth tugged up in response. Always so happy. He decided to see as soon as possible just how well she could draw and maybe, just maybe he could find a way to make her wish come true.
He noticed that his shirt and shoes had been removed and shrugged as he exited his room bare-foot. She'd seen him in less, and it was hot right now since it was summer. Besides—his smile turned slightly evil—he loved the way she got all embarrassed and speechless when confronted with half dressed men.
The smell of food cooking teased his senses as he made his way down to the kitchen, searching for the little flower that seemed to be the only light in his life. Where are you Rin?
"I'm sorry Miss, but we've never had a Hattori Rin attending this school. I'm sure that you're mistaken," the calm way in which those terrible words were spoken did nothing to sooth her temper and she hung up the phone in disgust.
Rin let out a loud frustrated sound and sat back in her chair, arms folded so that she could brood properly.
"What's wrong?" came a somewhat welcome voice and she turned, doing a fair job of not blushing when she saw her employer-turned-benefactor standing there shirtless.
"You just live to see me suffer don't you, Sessh," she ground out.
A less than innocent smile graced his lips and for some reason she was annoyed by the natural perfection of that face. What am I thinking? He's so beyond me, she thought feeling a little helpless and outclassed.
His gaze narrowed at her for a moment before he said in a slightly peeved tone, "Don't look at me like that—like I'm some kind of god."
"Hmph, you might as well be since I'm stuck relying on you. And," she added in an undertone, "you're good-looking enough to pass for one."
He caught the whispered words and a long, satisfied, highly disconcerting smirk spread slowly across his face.
"Believe me, Rin," he fairly purred, "If I were God then Kagura would be dead after being tortured for every day of the nightmarish five years I spent with her. And you...you would be far more developed, little Ms. Hattori," he sent a critical glance toward her less than average bust so that she couldn't possibly miss his meaning and she turned beet red.
"You idiotic little brat," she spat.
"Ah, ah, ah, that's sexy, idiotic brat to you. I don't think you've looked straight at my face since I came down."
If possible she turned even redder and said nothing, opting to turn away with a pout that he found to be rather cute.
Sighing, he took a seat and ran a hand through his silver hair again, catching her attention form the corner of her eye. "Ohh, shiny! I want to touch!" a tiny voice said inside and she swiftly pushed it down before she embarrassed herself further.
"Now tell me what's bothering you, Rin." He leaned in close and lifted a lock of hair away from the nape of her neck, twirling it around his finger.
She blinked at the intimacy of the gesture before remembering that she was mad at the witch who insisted that she was Sesshoumaru's wife.
Her eyes flashed as she spat out angrily, "That insufferable woman screwed me over! I called the school and supposedly I never attended. I called work and they said my services were no longer needed, I even talked to that jerk, Naraku, and he said that I had never really been one of his employees. I couldn't say anything and get Kagome in trouble so I hung up on him."
He nodded sagely before saying quietly, "I don't doubt her using money and connections to ruin your life." It was said so nonchalantly that she found herself getting angry with him again.
"Forgive me,Mr. Toyotomi, I don't know what possessed me to think that you would care," she said sarcastically.
"I don't know either. Maybe beating Hiten up scrambled what little brains you have."
She shook with anger and just when she was about ready to do a repeat performance of what she did to Hiten, he raised the lock of hair that he had stolen from the safety of her neck to his lips, dancing them lightly across the silken strands while keeping his eyes trained on her.
Rin was so dumbstruck that she completely missed the symbolic way he pressed the same lock to her lips in imitation of a kiss.
"Are you ready to go with me to a safe place Rin?"
'I'll go with you anywhere!" she nearly blurted out before compressing her lips and nodding, eyes widening as the smell of burning food reached her nostrils.
"I suggest you go and attend to that. I don't want you burning my house down in retaliation."
She quickly moved to the kitchen, grabbing a pan off of the stove and running water over it, causing steam to fill the room. Nose wrinkling, she dumped the blackened lump into the trashcan.
"Remind me to order out instead of having you cook," Sesshoumaru said, coming up behind her.
"It only burned because I was distracted," she muttered.
"Sure, get ready to go while I pack a few things," he said before disappearing upstairs.
"Baka," she muttered relocating to the living room to call Kagome. She still needed to pick up her things from the locker at work.
"Make it fast," Sesshoumaru growled, hands tightening on the steering wheel.
"Okay, okay, keep your shirt on," she replied crossly, quickly shutting the car door when she saw the lascivious smile teasing his lips.
He waited for ten minutes while she did whatever it was she had to do at her former job.
She was much quieter when she got back into the car, clutching something rectangular to her chest.
"What's that," he asked as he pulled away from the curb.
"A painting that I did in high school. It's how I won the award that got me a scholarship. Fat lot of good it did me though, now that I can't even go to school."
"I'd like to see it, sometime."
"You're just saying that, Sessh."
He looked at her out of the corner of his eye before answering mildly, "Do I ever just 'say' anything Rin? Shouldn't you know me better by now?"
"I doubt anyone really knows the 'true you' because you lock everything up inside all the time. Sometimes..." she trailed off before turning her attention back to the trees rushing past the window.
"Sometimes...?" he prompted but she shook her head, indicating that the sentence would probably never be finished.
"Silly girl," he muttered quietly before turning his attention back to the road.
"Rin..."
She nodded slightly to indicate that she was listening.
"What would you say if you could skip school altogether and start a career?"
"I'd say that it's impossible because I don't know anyone famous enough to employ me."
"Don't be so hasty."
"I can't help it because who am I really in the grand scheme of things? Who wants a penniless girl with no home, no clothes, nothing but a portrait of a woman long dead?" she looked at him and he saw pain shining very clearly in her eyes.
"What's wrong Rin?" he asked, feeling a faint vibration of alarm go through him. I really hope she doesn't cry again. "What happened at your job? Who hurt you?"
"No one, just...I waxed a little nostalgic that's all."
"I didn't know that nostalgic was part of your vocabulary." He looked at the way she clutched the picture to her chest and said softly, "It has something to do with that picture, doesn't it?"
He nearly jumped when her head moved to rest on his shoulder, a slender arm coming to wrap around his. It reminded him disturbingly of the dream, but he pushed down the natural inclination to pull away and allowed her to remain as she was. It was okay to be touched as long as it was her. It was okay because it was his Rin doing it. Never did it occur to him to question the possessive bent to his thoughts at the moment.
"I'm just...I just remembered that she's gone that's all. What would she think about me and the terrible way I acted last night? What would she think of you? Why is it that the only thing I have left of her is a silly painting?"
"Who is she?"
"My, mother. She died a few years back."
He winced. This was something he had no words for. His real mother had died a long time ago but he hadn't been especially close to her. He remembered being ignored for the most part while she played around with his dad, both never really paying any attention to their only child.
"You were a mistake!" he would never forget those spiteful words coming from her when he climbed into her lap to try and find some warmth, to see if he could be like the other children were with their parents. It got worse after she was diagnosed with cancer in the womb and he was blamed. "I never should have had you. You shouldn't exist." That was what she said on her deathbed. She rejected him until her last breath and he never forgave his father for coming to him then and only then after she was dead and after neglecting him for so long.
"I don't know what to say, Rin," he admitted honestly. Often he would hear people say "I'm sorry" when told about the death of a loved one but he couldn't be sincere because he felt nothing. He wasn't the type to care about the problems of others, except...except he felt...something twist slightly when it was Rin telling him her problems. A tiny voice said quietly, "Poor Rin," while a larger, angry voice said, "May you burn and rot, Hiten."
Sesshoumaru hadn't told her the full story behind his suicide attempt. He hadn't told her about Hiten casually sauntering up to his door with an ever present, belittling smile on his face. Nor did he tell her about the conversation that followed where he was given the blank paper that should have come back with her signature on it and informed that he no longer had a writing career. Something that turned out to be a lie...after the fact.
He remembered clearly what Hiten had said: "No one wants you, Sesshoumaru, and what else could there possibly be for you?" Then hands were touching his and a plastic bottle filled with something that rattled when he shook it was placed into his palm, fingers automatically closing around the sleeping pills.
"You know what to do, don't you Sesshoumaru." The voice was hypnotic in his ear almost sympathetic. "You should finish what you started, poor, helpless Sesshoumaru. Always alone and never understood. Isn't it time to end it?" he was vaguely aware of Hiten leaving after saying those words, his mental toe nudging at the fine line that separated genius from insanity.
For hours he sat, staring at the bottle on his desk and remembering the faces of people that he wished could care about him, before coming to a decision at last and sliding the cap free...
Hiten has his own agenda, he had concluded after Kagura's visit because she apparently didn't know why he tried to die so suddenly. And now he wants to hurt Rin.
"Where are we going Sessh?" Rin's voice interrupted his thoughts and he remembered the warmth emanating from her, soothing and pulling him away from the dark thoughts that usually plagued his conscious whenever she was away.
He looked down to meet her soft eyes and replied, "We're taking a trip to the house I grew up in. Kagura won't look for us there, at least not yet."
"Oh? Why wouldn't she?"
"Because I hate it."
"...Sessh."
"Mmhm...?"
"Why are you doing this for me? I'm grateful and all..., but why? And what exactly do you do for a living that you can afford to take care of me?"
He knew the latter question was going to crop up sometime and answered with a carefully crafted response. "I specialize in creative brainstorming which I transfer into written word."
"In other words you're an author." He could hear the smile in her voice. "What do you write?"
"As for why I help you...I find you interesting." He ignored her question. "You are one of the select few people that I can stand to be around, and I actually value that, as strange as it may seem. I am not what you call a... 'people person.'"
"Coulda' fooled me," she replied with a hint of sarcasm before a finger tapped him lightly on the nose. "You dodged my question again. Really Sessh, one of these days I'm going to get a straight answer from you."
"By any chance did you hear a pig fly overhead?"
"No, but I heard hell froze over just a few minutes ago and it's a wonderful time for ice skating."
He chuckled; she could be such a clever little thing sometimes, and he found that quite endearing.
"How long will it be until we reach the house?"
"About an hour."
"Well then, let's play a little game to pass the time."
He groaned inwardly and tightened his hands on the steering wheel.
Hiten surveyed the damage done to his lovely face and torso. There were bruises on each cheek and a definite hand-shaped print on the back of his neck where that little skank gripped him in order to keep him upright and continue her abuse.
Yes, he referred to it as abuse because he hadn't struck the first blow or any others for that matter. His pride refused to let him think that she actually had the upper hand in that more or less one sided fight, although not for lack of trying on his part.
His chest had a few bruises and he loosed his belt to ease the pressure on the regions below his waist. He was very fortunate that the family jewels hadn't been permanently injured by her disabling kick, but he was still very, very sore.
Buttoning the dress shirt he wore, he pulled on his suit jacket and wished that he was a woman so that he could wear some kind of cover-up for the horrendous marks that marred the perfection of his body.
"She beat you good, didn't she nii-chan?" came a rather annoying voice and he turned to glare at his brother, who was doing a poor job of restraining his laughter.
Manten was every bit as ugly as Hiten was beautiful, yet he still cared deeply for his little brother, although his love was being severely tried by the lack of sympathy for 'Nii-chan's' predicament.
"Care to tell me what you find so amusing?" His glare went from normal to 'I'm going to kill you if you don't stop' within seconds, effectively cowing his sibling.
"Nothing, nii-chan. I just came to tell you that Mrs. Toyotomi requests your presence."
He growled, why that annoying woman insisted on his presence constantly mystified him. Actually, it didn't because she divided his duties between doing her dirty work and making sure she never slept alone. He had heard her refer to him on various occasions as her pet and it became a struggle sometimes to hide the contempt she felt for him.
Just remember that this is but a temporary thing, he told himself as he exited the bathroom and headed for Kagura's office.
"What happened to you?" were the first words that came out of her mouth and he refrained from pulling the hair out of her supercilious head, pasting a charming smile on his face instead.
"I ran into a little problem, Miss Kagura."
"Sesshy poo's little girl trounced his prissy butt," Manten said crudely, and Hiten made a mental note to reintroduce him to the unique pains of being 'Nii-chan's pretzel.'
A smile graced the red lips that he absolutely despised and she said mockingly, "Couldn't even take care of one little girl, Hiten? Are you sure you're a man?"
You are going to die slowly for this, woman, he said mentally as his smile turned indolent and he blew lightly on his fingernails. "It was but a minor set back."
"Whatever. I want you to fetch that girl here. It's about time I had a heart to heart talk with her in person, isn't it, love?"
"Of course." He bowed deeply to hide the grimace on his face. Enjoy it while you can, insufferable wench. We'll see who has the last laugh and then everything you own will be mine.
Ohh, ohh DEVELOPMENT!!! This is the longest chapter yet. Now tell me honestly, how many people thought that Hiten had his own agenda? How many people wish that Sesshoumaru and Rin would just kiss already? Who actually connected Hiten to Sesshy's suicide attempt? Hmmmmmmmmmmm, more story coming up in the next episode titled!!! "Thread Bound Episode Fourteen: The Phantom Hiten!!!" Lol, just kidding, but lots more on the way and Sesshy's step-mom just might make an entrance. Please read and review, minna.