Disclaimer: NOT MINE. All characters and anything else of value belong to Disney. Please don't sue. I'm not making any money on any of this.
Pairing: KP/RS
Summary: the obligatory post-"Emotion Sickness" fanfic. :D
A/N: Um, this was originally supposed to have a much higher rating than it does. I just couldn't seem to get to the sexy bits. Yeah, I know, I'm really disappointed too.
"Fireworks"
After the fireworks display, Kim and Ron decided to celebrate their triumph over evil (once again) with cotton candy. As Kim picked at the spun sugar and Ron stuffed himself with mouthfuls straight from the stick, the two walked around the fairgrounds, joking and laughing over the displays and attractions. This time, Ron gracefully accepted the stuffed pickle Kim handed over to him after winning the horseshoe tossing game. Nine o'clock found them comfortably sitting behind one of the tents with Kim perched on a crate and laughing as Ron and Rufus did over-the-top impersonations of Shego and Drakken's antics that night. Finally, Rufus ran out of steam and decided to forgo reenacting kissy-faces with Ron for sleeping in his pocket. Kim scooted over and made room on the crate.
"Y'know KP," Ron said as he hopped up on the crate, "tonight wasn't all that bad. I mean, yeah I feared for my life once or thrice a while back there—remind me never to get on your bad side again, by the way—but I'd give Middleton Days '05 a 8.6 on the Ron-scale."
"8.6?" Kim asked, raising an eyebrow and casually crossing her legs.
"Well, I'd give it a much higher score," Ron said, trying not to stare at the couple more inches of leg the slit on Kim's dress exposed as it hiked up a bit, "but I couldn't help but notice the sad lack of a Bueno Nachos stand."
Kim rolled her eyes and smiled. "Of course."
A comfortable silence settled between the two of them and for a few minutes they sat looking up at the stars, the noise of the crowd and the fair muffled by the tents behind them, giving the illusion of privacy.
"Hey Ron," Kim began, leaning back on her arms.
"Yeah KP?" Ron mumbled around a mouthful of chocolate covered raisins.
"Why did you dump me?"
"Wh-what?" Ron sputtered after Kim performed the Heimlich maneuver on him when he started choking on his candy. Kim decided that the shocked, bug-eyed look was cute rather than stupid, and wondered idly if she was experiencing some residual effects from the Moodulator-chip.
"You gotta admit, dumping a girl on the first date is a pretty scuzy thing to do." Okay, Kim thought as she found herself giving the slack-jawed boy the through-the-eyelashes look, definitely some left over microchip mojo.
She found that while she didn't have the urge to giggle and walk her fingers up Ron's arm, she was feeling flirty and sexy and didn't quite care that her target was her best friend and sidekick, just like when she was under the influence of the Moodulator. In fact, she realized that a lot of the fun came from the fact that it was Ron she was teasing, something that she hadn't noticed when caught in the grips of wild mood swings.
Ron finally appeared to snap out of it. He cautiously inched away from Kim. "Uh, are you sure that mood-whatsit is gone?"
Kim inwardly smirked and outwardly sighed, arranging her face into a look of pure exasperation. It really was a lot of fun making Ron squirm. "Yes, Ron, I'm sure." She straightened up and brushed her hair out of her face. "It's just that this is a date, and it kind of sucks that I got dumped."
Ron cleared his throat nervously. "Um, well KP, you know why I had to do it—"
"No," Kim murmured thoughtfully, "I don't think I ever gave you a chance to finish your big dump-the-girl speech."
"Oh," Ron blinked, obviously not trusting the way Kim was playing with one of her earrings. And when did Kim Possible start wearing earrings anyway? "Um, it's because we're friends…" he drifted off as Kim fixed him with a look that made brain go blank.
"Yes, go on."
"Uh, we're friends, and, you know, hey!—not just friends but the bestest buds—so, dating will, you know, ruin that and… uh," Ron nervously yanked on his collar and wondered when it started getting hot. "I don't want us to be not friends anymore, KP," he finished a little desperately.
Kim looked at Ron's earnest, anxious face and felt her heart go a little wobbly. "Oh Ron," she said, smiling tremulously, "do you honestly think anything can make us not-friends-anymore? I mean, c'mon, we've gone through time travel, switched bodies, a bazillion other really freaky end-of-all-civilization-as-we-know-it stuff—"
"Don't forget Josh Mankey."
"—and Josh Mankey," Kim finished with a grin. "What makes you think dating will do what everything else hasn't been able to?"
Ron seriously considered this. "I dunno… but—"
"Look," Kim said in her no-nonsense, let's get the world saved and the bad guys whupped voice, "if we did start dating, and I did the worst possible thing a girlfriend can do—"
Ron gasped. "Steal all my Bueno Nachos Bueno Bucks!"
"Uh, no. I was thinking more like cheat on you with another guy."
"Oh."
"So," Kim continued relentlessly, "if I did that, and you found out and we break up in a break-up to end all break-ups, would you stop talking to me forever and not come to my rescue if I got caught by some bad guys?"
Ron stilled. Kim realized that she was holding her breath. It felt like this was a huge turning point in her relationship with Ron and as the moment stretched, she wondered what she'd do if Ron said 'yes, I'd stop talking to you forever and I wouldn't care if you died and got fed to the fish.'
Finally, Ron looked at Kim and said very clearly and slowly, "no. I'd be really mad at you for a long time, but I'd still help you if you were in trouble."
Relief washed over Kim. "See," she said, smiling brilliantly, "and I'd do the same if you cheated on me. We're going to be best friends forever, Ron, no matter what." Kim reached for Ron's hand and although Ron looked a little freaked, held her hand back.
"So," Ron muttered, clearing his throat.
"So."
"So… I didn't have to break up with you."
Kim squeezed his hand and grinned. "Nope."
"Oh." Ron thought about this for a moment. "But… we're still not dating, right?"
Kim shrugged. "Right. I mean, you did dump me after all."
"Oh."
"Although, it is kind of a waste," Kim continued on blithely, picking at the hem of her skirt, "I really spent a lot of time fixing myself up for you tonight. I mean, I got the little black dress, the heels, the jewelry… even the sexy lingerie."
Ron choked on air.
"You okay Ron?" Kim asked, her face a picture of wide-eyed innocence while the inner-femme fatale that every female had laughed evilly inside her head. Hmm, okay, maybe not so much microchip mojo but plain old hormones, she thought with a smirk.
"Uh, yeah KP, fine and dandy," Ron said, his voice cracking at the last syllable. He cleared his throat and tried not to look like he was trying to spontaneously develop x-ray vision to see through Kim's dress. "Um, so, uh, luh-lingerie, huh?"
"Yeah." Kim smiled and leaned towards Ron until her lips barely brushed his ear. "They're red."
Ron's eyes bugged out comically and attached themselves to the low neckline of Kim's dress. He was rewarded with a brief flash of something red and lacy as Kim straightened before letting go of his hand and jumping off the crate.
"Let's go," Kim said briskly as she brushed invisible dirt off her dress and pulled down the hem of her skirt. "It's almost ten p.m. and I think I heard something about you and a black hole if I didn't get home by curfew."
"Luh, luh, luh."
Kim tossed a grin over her shoulder at the pole-axed boy and sashayed away. Ron spent an entire minute lost in the sway of her hips before shaking himself like a dog and hurrying up after her.
"Hey, KP, wait up!"
Kim laughed and grabbed Ron's arm when he caught up, making sure that his bicep was pressed against her chest when she linked their arms together. Ron was blushing so hard he looked like he'd eaten a hot sauce loaded naco and Kim decided that even though she was dumped, nothing could make this date any better.
Well, Kim thought slyly as she looked at Ron from the corner of her eyes, almost nothing.
000
They were able to hitch a ride with the bearded lady from the fair (who was naturally thankful to Kim for rescuing her facial hair from a potentially disastrous almost-encounter with some of the flying knives the dwarves were using), so fortunately they were able to be on the Possible's doorstep with a several minutes left to spare.
"Well," Ron said, more than a little bummed out at having realized he'd been that close to getting it on with Kim-in-her-red-lingerie and without any repercussions at that. "Here we are. Chez Possible."
"Thanks, Ron. I really had a lot of fun tonight, getting dumped notwithstanding." Kim smiled. "I kinda wish that we could spend a little more time together."
Ron took one look at Kim smiling softly, playing with her bracelets and with a gleam in her green eyes that said, 'oh if only we can spend more time together we'll get to do soooo many great things that will most likely also be really, really fun and wonderful and… wet.'
Kim always did have very expressive eyes.
Ron sighed hugely, shifting a little on his feet and feeling very grateful that his jeans were baggy and his shirt long enough to cover the semi hard-on he'd had since getting that glimpse of red lace back at the fair twenty minutes ago. Thankfully, sporting wood for extended periods of time was not unfamiliar to Ron Stoppable, faithful sidekick of the ever hot—and apparently, hot to trot—Kim Possible. He was used to feeling sexually frustrated, really, but never with the knowledge of getting actual gratification if only. He decided that this kind of horniness was easily seven times harder—haha—than the usual. He sighed again, knowing that the only gratification he'll have tonight was likely to come from his own right hand.
"Yeah, me too," he said, smiling ruefully, "I guess I'll see you tomorrow, KP." He gave her a sad little wave and began to turn towards the driveway when a hand grabbed his shirt and yanked him back and suddenly there was a mouth under his.
Oh. Oh wow. It was wet and hot and holycowsogood and Ron felt himself blacking out for a second before a loud voice in his head (that strangely sounded like Barkin) told him not to chicken out and get on with it, Stoppable! Then he was kissing Kim with all the pent up frustration that only a horny sixteen year old boy can harbor.
Kim let out a surprised little squeak that sounded really sexy and Ron's world contracted to the feel of hot, soft lips under his and a clever tongue that was apparently trying to shove itself down his throat in the best way imaginable.
Ron's hands roamed Kim's body freely; he couldn't get enough of the strong curves of her back, the slight swell of her pert breasts, and the most amazing ass. And Kim was just as busy spearing her hands through his hair, grabbing at his shoulders, and taking sexy little nips at his lips and jaw. Ron didn't even know how it happened but he abruptly found himself pinning Kim to her front door and holy shit her legs were around his waist and wow this was the best thing ever.
"Uh," Kim panted, "um, we—ah!—gotta stop."
Ron raised his head long enough from where he was sucking on Kim's neck to mutter, "nuh-uh, no stopping."
Ron vaguely heard Kim moan something about parents and black holes and them being deader than dead but that didn't matter because he had his hands under her skirt and on something hot and smooth and barely covered with freaking lace and Kim gripped him hard with her arms and legs and just… rubbed.
And that was it. Ron felt the world shake and spin around him as he ascended to a whole new plane of existence. He could hear choirs and orchestras and Kim panting and screaming—
"Mom!"
And wow, the human body just wasn't built to go from sexhotnownownow! to minus 30 degrees in the span of a nanosecond. Ron recoiled. "What the fu—"
Okay, so the world shaking and spinning wasn't so much from finding nirvana than the door opening and the two of them falling down onto the Possible foyer floor. And look, there was Mrs. Dr. P staring down at him molesting her daughter and yeah he was so dead.
"Uh," Ron whimpered, suddenly hoping the ground would open up and swallow him whole because hey, it wasn't like he was going to be able to live for much longer anyhow. "Hi, Mrs. Dr. P, uh, how's it goin'?"
"Oh, I think my evening just got a whole lot more interesting, Ronald." Mrs. Dr. P remarked blandly, raising an eyebrow.
Suddenly Ron Stoppable realized what the scariest, more terrifying thing in the whole wide world was. It wasn't laser death rays or flesh eating monsters or even Bueno Nacho declaring bankruptcy.
It was making polite conversation with Mrs. Dr. Possible while trying to surreptitiously slide his hands from her underage teenaged daughter's ass.
He just hoped there would be enough left of him to bury.
"Mom!" Kim squeaked and scooted out from under Ron, her hands pulling at the hem of her skirt and the straps of her dress and bra. The two of them hastily scrambled up and tried to look like they weren't just moments away from getting naked and sweaty one minute ago.
Ron nervously smoothed his hair and shirt. He glanced at Kim and winced; her hair was all over the place, her lips were red and bruised, and was that a hickey forming on her neck? Ron groaned. Dead, he was so dead.
"Well," Kim's mom said wryly, "it certainly is lucky that I convinced your father not to wait up, isn't it?"
"Uh, it's not what it looks like?" Kim tried feebly.
Her mom didn't even bother to respond but only crossed her arms and gave the two of them a Look.
Kim grimaced. "Am I going to get grounded?"
Ron cringed. "Am I going to die?"
Mrs. Dr. P sighed heavily and shook her head. "Ron, you can go home now. Thank you for bringing Kim back home." She turned to her daughter. "Kim, I think we need to talk."
Ron and Kim shared a look before Ron smiled weakly. "I'll see you—" he glanced at Kim's mom "—uh, sometime in the future, KP. I hope."
"Yeah, Ron. See you." Kim said quietly. She shot her mom a begging look.
Her mom rolled her eyes. "I'll be waiting in the kitchen," she said, turning away and walking to the back of the house.
Kim waited until her mom disappeared from view before going over to Ron and touching his jaw with gentle fingers. "Don't worry, my mom's a lot more rational about these things than my dad. We really were lucky."
Ron let out a strained laugh. "If you say so, KP."
"Hey," she murmured, leaning over and kissing his cheek softly. "I really had fun tonight." She grinned. "A lot of fun."
Ron was able to turn his mind from all the creative ways a brain surgeon and a rocket scientist can kill him long enough to smile wanly back. "Yeah, me too."
Then Kim pulled him down for a kiss so hot he could feel his toes curling. In what seemed like forever and no time at all, Kim took a deep breath and a couple of steps back, smoothing down her hair.
Kim put her hands on his chest and licked delicately at his still open mouth. "Something to remember tonight by." She started pushing and he walked backwards in a daze until he was just past the doorway. "Goodnight," she said with a feline smile, and gently closed the door in his face.
Ron stood there, unmoving, his eyes still as wide as saucers and his mouth gaping open. He had never been so deliriously happy and at the same time so miserably hard. It was a weird feeling.
But really, really amazingly awesome.
After a few more minutes of staring unseeingly at the Kim's front door, he finally got enough brain cells working to turn around and head for home. He grinned deliriously.
"Booyah."
END.
A/N: For those of you over the age of consent in your area, the M-rated version of this fic is at livejournal dot com, username: madwomanupthere. While it technically didn't have sex, I didn't feel comfortable putting it up here. There will be a sequel, but it will also be at least M-rated so I won't put it on and instead it will be posted in chapters in my lj.