One heart's darkness

Disclaimer: I still don't own them... (cries) Erik, I need a hug!

Erik: (hugs author) She's a little delicate. Take no offense!

Me: (sniffles) Right... what was I going to say? Oh yes!

THANKS to my reviewers!

Harlequinny: Exactely my point! I'd tell them both to go to hell, well, I would if I weren't so hopelessly in love with Erik. The question is: Would Christine be strong enough for that? Can she just let them BOTH go?

As always, dear readers, REVIEW (please), makes me write faster!

Chapter Two

Madeleine had run back to an empty dressing room in which the passage to the underground house could be found behind a mirror. To her surprise, she found her father already waiting for her, on a chair in front of the little table.

When she entered, looking thoroughly flustered, Erik got up and pulled her into his arms without further comment.

"Papa," she sobbed and buried her face in his black dress shirt.

He lightly caressed her silken curls, that were so much like her mother's.

"I heard your little exchange with Christine," he said softly after awhile.

"Don't be angry, please," came her whispered reply.

"No, I'm not angry," he said with a smile. "I knew she would notice us sometime. They've been here a lot lately, and one Phantom could hide, but two? I'm only sorry you hurt so much, chérie, I wish I could make up for you missing your mother, but I can't."

Madeleine pulled back and gave him a watery smile. "It's fine. Let's go home, papa!"

They had just passed through the mirror when Christine barged into the room, managing to catch the secret door before it closed all the way.

She strained her ears, but couldn't hear anything, not even footfalls. A shiver passed down her spine as she entered the dark passage. Countless memories came flooding back to her. She ran, as fast as her heavy ball gown would allow her and luck was with her, for she reached the shore of the underground lake just as Erik was assisting Madeleine into the boat. Again, her heart gave a painful jolt as she saw the man again, whom she had deemed long dead. Those feelings for him she had kept locked up assaulted her and she wanted nothing more than to drop to her knees and beg him for forgiveness.

"Wait!" she cried and two masked faces turned towards her. "Please," she panted, "let me explain. I never abandoned Madeleine, I never would have!"

There was a brief silence in which father and daughter exchanged a glance, then Erik cleared his throat and decided, mostly to take his and his daughter's minds off any murderous thoughts they might have, "Such matters should be discussed somewhere comfortable. Christine?" He held out his hand, which she took without hesitation, and helped her into the boat as well.

He came last and poled them across the water. Madeleine got out first on the opposite shore, unlocked the door and, for the first time in eighteen years, Christine set foot in the underground house again. It felt like coming home, hardly anything had changed.

"Tea?" Madeleine suggested. She was still not in the least convinced that she should trust Christine de Chagny any further than she could throw her, but she was not about to forget her manners over that.

Erik, after seeing Christine nod and approving himself, reminded her, "English tea, though, my dear, your mother doesn't like our Russian tea."

Madeleine nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.

"My daughter," Christine whispered under her breath, before turning to Erik and asking, "she drinks Russian tea? Is there anything she got from me? She certainly has your temper."

Erik simply nodded at that. He was uncomfortable having Christine in his home again and began to question the wisdom of that decision. It had taken him and Madeleine two years to become used to her continued presence in the opera house and he had thought himself ready to face her again, but the old anger at her betrayal was beginning to burn in him again.

"She has your hair," he murmured absentmindedly and motioned for her to follow him as he went into the living room and sat down in a high-backed armchair.

Madeleine joined them with the tea. Her cold amber eyes were not leaving Christine's face, who became increasingly nervous between the two masked creatures.

Madeleine didn't touch her tea, but leaned back in her armchair and said coldly, "You were going to explain to us why you sent me away, madame!"

Christine winced, took a deep breath and started explaining.

"Yours was a difficult birth, Madeleine, and I fainted the moment it was over, without ever getting the chance to look at you. The doctor said, it had been exhaustion, I had been in labour for three days.

Anyway, when I awoke, Raoul told me that I had given birth to a stillborn girl and that he had already taken care of everything… the funeral and such… to spare me the pain. I was heartbroken, feeling like it was my fault. What really happened… Raoul came to look at you, Madeleine, and saw, well, he saw that you were clearly Erik's daughter…"

"I should have known the stupid boy would come into play somehow," Erik muttered under his breath. Madeleine just scoffed. "Oh please, madame, as touching as your tale is, what do you expect? My forgiveness? Never!" she spat, but waved a hand in her mother direction, "But please, finish the story!"

"There's not much left to tell. He took you away, to the shore of the lake, placing you in the boat for Erik to find and left."

"And I suspect you just forgive him for that?" Erik asked scathingly, at which Christine could only shrug helplessly.

Madeleine stood up stiffly. "Please, excuse me, papa, but I should go. I don't want to dirty the carpet with blood and I feel the desperate urge to hurt someone, so I should leave before I do just that!" Hatred was flaring in her eyes and she all but ran from the room. A moment later, they heard the door being wrenched open and then slammed shut.

Christine fidgeted. She was acutely aware of Erik being so close to her, although he seemed not to notice her presence at all, as he was simply staring into his cup.

Finally, the silence became unbearable to her and she cast wildly around for something to say.

"You know, I… I haven't really sung at all, since the last time we sang together… I miss our lessons," she managed with a weak smile. He looked up at her, his eyes cold. "Why did you follow us down here? Why couldn't you leave us alone?" he asked finally, not taking her offer of polite conversation.

"I had just seen my daughter, a daughter I never even knew I had, and you just expect me to ignore that?"

"What I expect you to do," he replied through gritted teeth, "is not to cause anymore hurt to my family. I raised Madeleine as best I could, but I couldn't protect her from mankind's cruelty entirely. I want to at least protect her from yours!"

"My cruelty?" Christine gasped, "YOU sent me away! I would have stayed! You made me go, convinced me you were dying… I loved you back then! But I went, as you said, hoping that I would come to love Raoul just as much after a while. Well, it has been eighteen years and I still don't love him as much as I love you!"

"Spare me, Christine! I don't have the strength to go through this again! Finding Madeleine that night, thinking you had abandoned her, that made it so easy to start hating you again. I liked that feeling. I didn't have to envy Raoul for the pleasure of holding you in his arms each night, for seeing your sweet face all the time…" he turned away again, "You're still beautiful, you know? But you're also someone I don't know anymore."

Tears were streaming down Christine's face now. She stood up and went to Erik, who had also gotten to his feet and was standing rigidly next to the fireplace. He ignored her, even when she placed a hand tentatively on his shoulder. "I have already broken my marriage vows," she whispered, "I cannot love and cherish Raoul for as long as I live… not after what he did and not with you back in my life!"

Erik faced her again. "What are you saying?" Amber eyes were full of disbelieve as Christine slipped the mask off his face to expose his deformity.

She stood on tiptoe and lightly, hesitantly, pressed her lips against his. He didn't react at first, then he shoved her away from him with a feral snarl.

"Not again, Christine," he growled, "or do you want to destroy me utterly this time? Are you trying to prove to yourself that you can still hurt me?"

"No," she whispered, tears flowing again, "I wanted to see if I could still feel like I did all those years ago. But we are both…very different people now. And I want your forgiveness… although I should have known that even the most forgiving person could not excuse all the mistakes I have made anymore. Madeleine… she should not have grown up imagining that her mother hates her." She was biting her lower lip until she tasted blood. She had dropped down to sit on the floor, her hands squeezing her silk handkerchief. Erik knelt down in front of her, a sudden softness in his eyes. "Now, my dear," he said gently, "now you know what it feels like to be in the hell that is my life!" And finally, he drew her into his arms and allowed her to cry.

A/N: I know this chapter is pretty short, but I've got more coming, I promise! I'm still not sure which way this fic is going to turn, but either way, it will be a tough struggle. Erik is not the most forgiving person, although he might appear a bit soft at the end of this chapter. More of Raoul coming up! Next chapter he meets Madeleine and Erik. Can you guess what will happen?

I remain your obedient servant

P.F.A.