Gone In… 1,123 Seconds
It had been a startling thing, really, to come to the next town and find Gourry's face plastered on about a billion WANTED posters outside the city walls. Luckily, Lina had spotted the posters before they'd reached the main gate, grabbed one, and the group disappeared back into the grove of trees plopped down outside of the city's protective wall.
"This is insane!"
The four of them, Lina, Gourry, Amelia, and Zelgadis, sat in a small clearing. They were circled around the WANTED poster Lina had uncrumpled as soon as they felt it safe to stop. Sure enough, the picture there was an exact image of the blonde swordsman, though there was something a bit fishy about the picture itself. None of them could quite put a finger on it. Amelia noticed that there were no other details on the posted besides the words WANTED, Gourry's artfully drawn face, and the words 'Dead or Alive' under the reward amount. The numbers alone elicited a low whistle from Amelia. "Miss Lina, look! Three million… Even when you were wanted in Seyruun, you, Mr. Gourry, and Mr. Zelgadis together weren't that much!"
Lina started twitching and making incomprehensible noises. One might've guessed they were sounds of utter disbelief. Amelia's attention was off of the poster now. Still studying the poster, Zel spared a glance at Lina out of the corner of his eye and murmured, "Don't mind her, Amelia. She's just miffed that she's not 'wanted'."
THONK
Zelgadis rolled away from the trio, clutching at the throbbing lump on his stony forehead. Lina glared loftily at the chimera and clenched her right fist again, cracking the knuckles. The small woman turned back to the poster, scowling at it now. After a moment, she admitted, "This is bizarre. Gourry, are you sure you've never been here before?"
"Absolutely positive," he assured her, right hand plastered firmly to his chest and his left hand up in the three-finger salute of a Scout. Lina sighed and ran a hand through her bright hair, scratching her scalp. "Well, we need the supplies badly. I wanted to check for news, too, and see if any more bandits are in the area." She clasped her hands together and looked innocently joyous about her next though, "And to see if there's a bounty I can collect on that group I fried a few days ago!"
Amelia sighed and sweat-dropped, "Miss Lina, you're—" "This isn't me!" Gourry's shout had interrupted the princess. No one really expect Gourry to move so fast, but he did. And suddenly Lina found herself product to close scrutiny. Very uncomfortably close scrutiny. Gourry's face was within a handspan of her undersized chest, and one hand was gripping one of Lina's shoulder guards as his free hand's fingers poked at his forehead. Everyone one was frozen for a moment. What the hell was he doing?
Suffice it to say, once Lina got hold of herself, much pain followed in the form of a very solid knee to the swordsman's groin. Her face as red as her hair, Lina shrieked, "What's the big idea, huh'?"
Blue in the face and curled up tightly on the cool green grass, Gourry could not answer. Zelgadis determinedly avoided looking either Lina or Gourry as he cast a healing spell on himself. Amelia was wondering whether or not to try and placate the steaming sorceress.
Not happy that she wasn't getting an answer from him, Lina stomped over and turned him over (none to gently, either) with her foot. "Come on, Dung-for-brains, what the hell possessed you? I'm and innocent girl and you have no business doing that!"
Gourry came out strained and squeaky, "Not… you… Reflection. Scar."
"Reflection?" Lina snapped. She sifted her stance and happened to move into a beam of sunlight that penetrated the leaves. A bright, reflective glare caught her eyes. She looked down at her cloak's clasp: mirror-bright brass beads and a bar. She saw herself looking up at herself seven times from those surfaces. Oh, well, that explained it. The blush still didn't leave. Okay, so, that part was cleared up. Still something left, though, "Scar?" she demanded. "What scar? You don't have a scar."
"Poster," wheezed the still tightly curled-up man. Lina didn't budge. Amelia, however, brought the rumpled poster over to the sorceress and tried to smooth it out. After another moment's study, it became clear. Sure enough, Poster Gourry sported a long scar across his forehead, giving it the vague semblance of a unibrow. Lina pursed her lips in a frown. "Well, I doubt the city's guard would bother catching that little detail if we didn't. Who the hell is this guy, anyways? And whaddid he do to have THAT big of price on his head? If I could catch him..." Amelia caught her friend's conspiratory grin and immediately went into Justice-mode, "No, Miss Lina! In the name of Justice, I refuse to let you use Mr. Gourry as bait for your own selfish monetarygains!"
Lina cast the princess a withering look and was about to say something along the lines of I do that anyways, but rather, stated stubbornly, "We still need supplies though…"
She thought for a moment, eyes traveling from Amelia to Gourry to Zelgadis. Finally, she said, "Alright. Zel and I will go into town and see what we can find. Amelia Stay here with…" She shrugged. The sorceress had actually considered apologizing to Gourry… but decided against it. "C'mon Zel, it's still morning. Maybe if we get back in time we can travel a little ways before we camp, so we don't risk being found by sentries or something."
Hauling himself to his feet, he looked back one last time at Amelia and still curled-up Gourry before following Lina out of the trees.
oOoOoOoOoOoOo
Some hours later, Lina and Zelgadis returned. Both of them had odd looks on their faces. "Change of plans!" Lina caroled out. Gourry, who'd recovered and then decided to take a nap, woke with a start. Amelia stopped mending a small rip she'd found in her cloak to look up. Zelgadis was laden with brown paper-wrapped packages as well as a paper bag labeled 'PRODUCE'. Lina carried nothing.
"Change of plans, Miss Lina? What's this about?" Amelia broke of her thread and stuffed the needle back into her pincushion. The sorceress nodded as she directed Zel to drop the packages behind the thick trunk of a gnarlsome oak at the edge of their small clearing. "Yup. The Clothier's we were at, the one who sold us all this," she gestured to the pile of packages Zelgadis was now dusting his hands of, "he told us that the city has a temple—a really old one. And there's underground ruins underneath it that haven't been touched in years, so…" "So Mr. Zelgadis wants to check it out and see if there's anything there for him." Amelia finished logically for her. "That's wonderful! I could use a good hot bath, too… Oh, wait. What about Mr. Gourry?"
"Yeah, what about me, Lina? I don't want to be arrested for something I didn't do because I look like some guy on a poster with a uniscar, and you blowing up the town would be bad. And what's a Clothier?"
As soon as the blonde saw the cat-like grin forming on his much shorter friend, a thrill of dread welled up in him. This couldn't be good…
oOoOoOoOoOoOo
It took exactly 1,123 seconds to get Gourry garbed and ready for their entrance into town. Really, the dress Lina had picked out this time wasn't as bad as the one he'd been in during his… encounter… with Volun. This one was a dusty shade of a dark rose pink, and the collar was a high one, nearly reaching his chin. The high collar also helped to hide the fact the ample addition to his chest he now sported was fake. The skirts of the dress, though a bit voluminous, were blessedly long and covered up the fact that his new shoes (white dress boots with hundreds of little pearly buttons running up the sides) were a tad bit too small. His hair had been brush luxuriously and treated with some sprays and lotions Lina had purchased in town. A large pink bow held it back from his made-up face. The shade of lipstick Lina used actually did look quite lovely on him.
Giving off the vibes of a sickened, miserable blonde puppy, Gourry tugged the flowery cloak his diminutive sorceress provided him with around himself tighter as he followed Zelgadis down the road leading to the walled city. Amelia and Lina were right behind him, not letting him lag in the least. Lina was looking quite smug and Amelia was quietly ordering Gourry improvements.
"Stand up straighter Miss Lala! Be proud of your sexy, blonde bombshell body! Or else no one will buy the act." The last part was muttered, however. With every word Gourry flinched and turned one shade greener. Up front, thought he was trying to ignore what was happening behind him, Zelgadis blushed faintly and was most heartily thankful his face appeared on none of the posters.
Gourry thought with fierce resolution that he would not leave his inn-room until they left the city. At all. For anything.
Exhibit D.) Gourry's Remaining Dignity -- gone in 1,123 seconds.
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A/N: It's been years since I myself've been a Girl Scout, so if I got the salute for Boys wrong...I don't really care.xD And… sorry for the wait! I went out of town for the holidays (no computer for almost three weeks! I had to hand-write this one at first... so many crossing-outs on the original draft!), and I meant to be able to have this up some two weeks ago when I DID have brief computer-access… but it didn't happen. The next one will come sooner, hopefully!
A Happy Decemberween Holiday Season to everyone!