Truth over the Table

"Thanks for dinner," Beclam said politely as he rose from the table in Paine and Baralai's backyard.

"Thanks for coming," Paine replied, standing and saluting the commander. "Always nice to see you."

An eyebrow twitched, but otherwise he did not react. Paine had reached an understanding with Beclam since his clashes with Yuna and the Gullwings, but it would be pushing it to say that they were friendly. Pleasantries over the occasional dinner were the best they could manage.

Beclam turned to his fellow commanders, who were both still seated and chatting with Baralai. The general and the High Councilor had retired some time ago, pleading morning meetings. Since so many people came into town for the tournament, the days immediately following were usually crowded with government and military business. "Elma, Kal? You ready?"

Elma, who had been leaning forward on her elbows, a glass of wine in her hands, sat up straight. "Yep, sure." She finished her drink and set down the glass as she got to her feet. "Great meal as always, Baralai."

"Thank you, Commander," he said with a smile of genuine gratitude at the praise.

Kal also sat up but did not stand. "I'll be along in a few minutes. See you both in the barracks later."

Beclam shrugged. "As you like. You're the one who has to teach tomorrow."

"Oh, you're leading the advanced machina weapons class?" Elma shrugged on her coat. "That'll be great for the cadets, learning from the best shot in the Force."

"You flatter me, Elma," Kal said, laughing. "I've picked it up well enough, but the Al Bhed sharpshooters who've used machina all their lives are far better than I."

"You were an archer in the warrior monks, yes? Do you ever regret switching to guns?" Baralai asked.

Kal shook his head. "Nah. Bullets are superior to arrows in so many ways. Progress is a good thing. Still, I do sometimes miss the feel of catgut and feathers in my fingers -- archery is a lot more tactile than gunnery. I still take out my old bow for occasional target practice, just so I won't forget."

"Useless nostalgia." Beclam snorted. "Anyway, I should be going. Elma?"

"See you guys!" Salutes and handshakes were exchanged, and Beclam and Elma headed for the Academy, where they were staying in guest quarters for the night, along with other military officers who had come to see the games.

Paine sat back down at the table, across from Kal. "You must hear this all the time," he said, "but you two really know how to throw a party. Your cooking skills, Councilor... going back to Mushroom Rock after dinner here is always a trial."

"It's not that bad, is it?" said Baralai. "Certainly better than it used to be in the temples."

Kal laughed. "No joke. You were Bevelle-trained, right? Food didn't get worse than that. Well, almost never, I lived through a couple of really awful years in Kilika. But for pure consistency of terribleness, Bevelle won hands down."

"That's why I decided to learn to cook, you know." Baralai leaned back in his chair. "I was a temple orphan, then trained as a priest, followed by a short time in the military and two years in New Yevon. As soon as I was a free man, I swore that I would never, ever eat bad food again. Learning how to cook properly for myself seemed safest."

"But I get the ultimate benefit," said Paine, feeling smug. "All the meals, none of the work."

"Only because I won't let you within ten feet of the kitchen." Baralai smiled fondly at her, then looked at Kal. "My wife is a talented woman in many respects, but cooking? Let's just say she'd fit right in with the Bevelle chefs."

"Hey." But she still laughed.

Kal smiled, too, then leaned over to Paine. "I had a very pleasant lunch with your cousin," he said.

"Good, I'm glad." Paine took a sip of wine. "Liss is always so hungry for real information about her father, and it sounds like you're the best source she's discovered in a long time. I must admit, I'm rather curious myself."

"But you must know something about him, if he was your uncle." Kal looked more closely at Paine. "Hey, wait a minute! Did you grow up in that same village?"

Paine nodded. "Yeah, Tzeki Village. Born there, lived there until I was fifteen, except for two years in Luca. Why?"

Kal sat up straighter in his chair. "I met you, Paine! When you were a kid. Do you remember the day that your village was attacked by Sinspawn?"

She shuddered a little. Baralai reached over the table and rubbed her hand lightly. "I was playing outside when they came. Mom hustled me into the house, so we were safe at first, but then we thought they were gone so we went back out. But there was a second wave. I remember a huge gray bug leaping on my face, then nothing until I woke up with my mom sobbing over me. One of the most terrifying days of my life."

"I was there, fighting that second wave! Auron's girl -- what was her name again? Liss's mom -- anyway, he and I held off the Sinspawn while she treated you with potions."

"Huh." Paine thought hard, then shook her head. "Nope, sorry, I don't recall. I remember my uncle being there, not much else. But I was only five, and I was pretty traumatized at the time."

"Sure, I'm not surprised. But still, small world."

"I remember you," said Baralai abruptly.

Kal turned to him in surprise. "You do?"

The younger man nodded. "From St. Bevelle, when you were in Maester Brac's personal guard. I'd see you walking with great purpose somewhere or another, sometimes with the Maester or with Sir Auron, sometimes your whole squadron together. I thought you were all impossibly heroic."

Kal chuckled. "Are you serious? How old were you?"

"Oh, six or seven," Baralai answered, grinning. "Occasionally I would sneak away from the nuns and watch you all train, dream about being one of you someday."

Paine squeezed Baralai's hand, smiling at the thought of the boy he once was. Then she leaned forward and rested her cheek on her free hand. "So, what stories did you tell Liss?"

"Oh, a little of everything." Kal smiled with memory. "Our days as trainees, the years we served together in Kilika and Bevelle. We had a lot of good times. Not all good times, though. I guess Liss just found out about the incident with the marriage offer?"

"Yes. So did I. We ran into our grandfather a couple of weeks ago. He dropped a lot of hints, and Liss got frustrated with only knowing bits and pieces of the story. So she asked Arelle flat out what had happened, and got a lot more truth than she bargained for." She sighed. "It was an ugly business, as I'm sure you know, and it tore our family apart."

Kal nodded slowly. "Did a real number on the warrior monks, too."

"Really?" Baralai asked. "How so?"

"Oh, you know, the usual Bevelle political crap." The commander let out a sharp breath. "Auron had many allies as well as his share of enemies, not to mention the enemies who he thought were allies. People taking sides and falling from favor, Kinoc growing so powerful that nothing could bring him down, not even when his involvement in the affair became common knowledge."

Baralai's hand stiffened in Paine's at the mention of the late Maester. "Kinoc?" he asked, his voice deceptively calm. "What has he to do with this?"

Raising his eyebrows, Kal turned to look at his host. "How can you ask that? He had everything to do with it."

Paine interrupted as she grew cold with dread. "Kal, he doesn't know the whole story."

Baralai turned a dangerous look to his wife -- he was still outwardly placid, but Paine knew that he was seething. "So it would seem." He withdrew his hand and crossed his arms. "Perhaps you would care to enlighten me, Commander?"

As Kal explained the facts of Kinoc's hideous betrayal, Paine watched her husband's face carefully. The mask never cracked, but she saw the anger boiling beneath. And she worried.

Baralai lowered his head when Kal had finished. "The atrocities that can be laid at that man's feet," he said, voice low. He rose to his feet and turned around, walking into the house without another word.

"Wow," Kal said. "I struck a nerve."

"Not your fault," said Paine quietly. "Auron's was not the only life poisoned by Kinoc -- he tainted ours, too. Twice, in my case. I've gotten past it, but Baralai still takes it personally. That's why I didn't tell him about Kinoc's role in this. But I think I made the wrong decision." She looked at Kal. "Sorry the night ended on such a down note."

"Me too." Kal stood up. "Thanks again for dinner; see you tomorrow?"

"Yes. The Highroad, eight AM?" He nodded, then went on his way.

Once he had gone, Paine gathered up dirty plates in her arms and carried them into the house for the second night in a row. But this time, she feared what she might find inside.

Our party stopped at the travelers' hut on the Thunder Plains that night. Jecht built the fire and started water boiling; I pulled out the basket that Relle had prepared for us and started laying the food out on the table in the center of the room.

Relle. I paused in my task, holding a loaf of her bread in my hand, staring into the distance. I wondered what she was doing right now, and when I would see her again. Or if.

Stop that, I told myself sternly. I could not go down that path; it would be madness. I had to let her go for the time being. If I survived, she would be there, waiting. Otherwise, we would meet again on the Farplane. Not my first choice, but if my death meant Braska's success and the end of Sin? Yes. It was a trade I was willing to make.

I set the loaf down on the table and finished setting out the meal, pouring sake for Braska and myself, water for Jecht, then sat. Braska took the chair next to me and lifted his drink. "To your marriage," he said seriously. "May Arelle bring as much joy to you as Tessa brought to me."

I touched the rim of my glass to his. "Thank you, my lord. If we are half as happy as you were, I will be satisfied." We both drank deeply.

He set down his glass and then filled it up again. "And another toast." He stood with a smile. "Happy birthday, Auron."

I looked at the floor, embarrassed, then back up at Braska. "She told you?"

He nodded. "Why didn't you tell us it was coming?"

"Because I forgot." A sheepish grin made its way to my face. "Relle had to remind me this morning."

"So, birthday boy," Jecht called from the fireplace, "how old're you?"

I had to think for a moment. "Twenty-four." Was that really possible? I thought about my twenty-third birthday, which I'd celebrated with Gray Squad. Jass and Kal had gotten the men all together and taken me out to my favorite bar. Kinoc had come into town for the occasion, and Braska had also dropped by. I caught his eye and saw that he was remembering that carefree evening as well. Had it only been a year? So much had happened in that time; it seemed more like ten.

"Twenty-four!" Jecht walked over to the table and dropped into a chair. "You're just a kid!"

I turned to him with a rather indignant glare. "At least I don't act like one."

"Well, that's sure true." He shook his head. "I think this morning was the first time I ever saw you actually, y'know, relax."

Braska chuckled quietly and shook his head as he sat. "This 'kid', as you call him, was a respected military officer before he was nineteen. Spira's not an easy place to live -- we all grew up pretty fast."

"Whatever you say." He took a swig of his water, then started to eat. "Damn!" he said, mouth still full of a meat pastry. "This stuff is good! No wonder you married her, Auron."

I smiled, absurdly pleased by the compliment.

"One thing, though," he continued after he had swallowed. "Why did you rush into it like that?"

I raised an eyebrow. "We were unofficially engaged for seven years. I'd hardly say we rushed into marriage. If anything, we were far overdue."

"No, no," he said. "I mean, why did Braska have to do it right then and there? Sure, it's a risky journey and all, but we'll make it, right? Why couldn't ya have waited until afterwards, do it all formal-like in the temple with friends and family and all that? Seems more your style."

I looked at Braska, who would not meet my gaze. Then I looked to Jecht, who leaned back and folded his arms. He stared at Braska, then me, then Braska again. "Is there somethin' you ain't telling me?"

I touched Braska's shoulder. "My lord. He has to know."

My summoner breathed very deeply, then let the air out, slow and shuddering. "It's past time, isn't it." He looked across the table at Jecht, resolved blue eyes staring into confused and angry brown ones, and the tension in the room became nearly unbearable.

I stood. "I'll leave you alone," I said. This was Braska's truth to tell; best for me to stay out of the way. Pushing my left arm through its coat sleeve, I stepped through the door and into the rain.

Despite its loudness, I found something almost peaceful about the racket of the Thunder Plains. The patter of the never-ceasing raindrops, each flash of lightning followed by its satisfying rumble. I wouldn't want to live here, but it was rather pleasant to be part of the storm for a time, especially when I knew a hot fire and dry bed waited for me inside.

Besides, the noise of the thunder helped blot out what was surely a loud and emotional discussion going on inside.

I'd been leaning against the wall of the hut for about half an hour when the door flew open and Jecht stormed out. "Damn you, Auron!" he shouted, thrusting his face an inch from mine. "You knew about this, didn't you!"

"Of course I did," I said mildly. "I've known what calling the Final Aeon does to the summoner for as long as I can remember."

He flung his arms up in the air as he leaned back from me. "Then why the hell didn't you stop him? Why're you goin' along with this? I thought he was your friend!"

"He is! Why else would I be here?" I straightened up. "I did try to talk him out of it, when he first asked me to be his guardian. But once my lord's mind is set on a course of action, there's no swaying him. So I chose to come along and ensure his success as best I could. Better that than letting him go off to die alone, for nothing."

"But--"

"Would you rather I had tied him to a chair in Bevelle? Because that would have been the only way to keep him there."

Jecht brought his hands back down and covered his face for a moment. Then he dropped them entirely and shook his head. "This whole thing is crazy," he muttered. "Why didn't you say something?"

"It wasn't my place. Lord Braska asked that he be allowed to tell you personally, and I respected his wishes."

"Ah..." He dropped his head and turned away. "Dammit."

"So. Now that you understand what Lord Braska must do, do you still want to journey with us?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Don't see what choice I got. He's determined, right? Someone's gotta beat Sin. Like you said, if he's gonna die, it might as well be for a reason." Then he let out a sigh. "And there's still Zanarkand, whatever's really there. Yeah. I gotta see this thing through."

"He will be glad to hear it." I clapped a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Come, let's get out of the storm and finish our supper."

"In a while," he said.

I nodded and dropped my hand. As I started to open the door, I turned back to look at him. He had raised his face to the sky, cool raindrops falling on his cheeks, dripping down as if they were tears. I watched for a minute, then left him.