A/N: Thanks a lot of to everyone that reviwed! I promise to answer the reviews once the holidays are over. But you've been so kind that I wanted to put this chapter up. I've written this story a long time ago and this is the last chapter I have. I wasn't sure about going on with this story but if you want me to I'll try to go on. Thanks a lot for reading!
A/N 2: To recap Lucas had returned to Tree Hill because Keith was getting married. Nathan is living with Dan and Haley and Nathan had broken up because Dan had blackmailed her. Peyton is having an unpleasant visitor and Brooke is at a party.
Chapter five: The reason I'm back
Lucas sighed. He knew this was coming. But he didn´t want it to come. He decided he could play dumb for a little more.
"To talk about what?"
Karen held his anger. Lucas was exaggerating his evasive way. He might have been living with Keith but she was still his mother and she deserved explanations.
"Lots of things. First why did you leave Keith so sudden?"
"Oh...so Keith called?" His first idea had been to explain everything to his mom before Keith had that chance but then, he just wasn´t in a talking mood. He hadn´t had that mood around his mom much since he had learnt about that custody thing.
"Yes...Keith called. What were you thinking...you only left him a note...you didn´t even have money to arrive here..."
Lucas hesitated, he didn´t know how to put this. His mom´s voice interrupted his thoughts.
"Keith thinks your sudden decision has to do with Gina. Is that true? Why didn´t you tell me about her?"
"Keith was planning to do that later. He wasn't sure on how to do that. He wanted someone to tell Dan, also. I took care of that"
"How?"
"I bumped into him. He gave me a ride. "
"Oh." Karen looked at his son, feeling angry. She was finding hard to read him. How could that happen?. Her baby, her little boy, he was just a stranger to her. She wanted her son back. What would it take to bring him to his old self?
"Does Dan have something to do with your attitude?"
"What attitude?"
"Luke...you are so distant...I always thought that the custody thing had a lot to do with you wanting to leave. I also thought you would understand that your home is here and you´d come back. But you are angrier than when you left."
"I just didn´t want to come back"
"And why did you?"
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AT PEYTON'S
Peyton was shaking. She didn´t know how long Nicky and her had been like this. She was sitting in a chair in her living room and Nicky was holding a gun. She hadn´t said anything in a while. She had made her remained in silence. Suddenly, Nicky hit Peyton´s chair.
"Come on, bitch! What's wrong? Your smart mouth took a vacation?"
Peyton was almost screaming.
"Put that gun down, Nicky. What are you planning to do?"
"You don't know how it feels to be a mother, bitch. I know you lost yours, you pour tortured soul...life has been so unfair to you. You have a beautiful house and great friends..and now you want my boyfriend and my girl...you took my little girl away from me"
"I didn't"
"Don't talk, bitch. Just let me watch you with your mouth shut "
Peyton didn´t talk again. She was too scared and her voice seemed to get Nicky angrier.
Nicky smiled evilly.
"So much better. Thanks to you I don´t know where my little girl is. MY baby. I went to the address Brooke gave me. I visited every person I know that is related to Jake. I made a mistake, I want my baby back. Don´t I have the right to change my mind? Doesn't my baby deserve to be with her mother? And she'll never be yours keep that in mind, bitch. I hope you can live with the guilt...if you live..look at me, Peyton. I want to see your face when I do this."
Peyton was looking at her in shock, anyway. The shot was heard all over the block.
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CHARLESTON-Keith´s house
Summer nights. She just loved them. She loved them especially if she could be in a backyard like that one. There was something in it that reminded her of her childhood in Italy. She sighed. She played with her cigarette, thinking vaguely that the smoke was ruining the beautiful nature picture. Who cared?
"Smoking again?"
Her niece interrupted her thoughts. Bella looked gorgeous that night. Well, always. At least from the outside. She didn´t want to think how broken she could look from the inside. ´She´ll get over all that..as I did when I was her age...well I guess...´ Can someone get really over turbulent relationships? Yes. Get over their consequences? Never.
"I'm always smoking, Bella. And so are you "
"I stop from time to time but you don't. It's going to kill you, you know that, don't you?"
Gina didn't bother to answer that.
"What's up to you? Why are you here?"
"I'm looking for Luke. I thought he was helping with your moving"
Bella looked really emotional. Whatever she had to say to that kid was urgent.
"I think your friend left"
"Where to?"
"Where you think, where he belongs...with his mom..."
Bella shook her head, disappointed and energetic.
"Oh..Gina you didn't. You didn't talk him into leaving cause you felt threatened. You knew Keith had a son when you met him..."
"Lucas is not his son "
Gina´s voice was weak. She never showed much emotion in her tones, not even in her faces. But Bella had known her for a long time and she knew she was upset.
"Come on..he thinks of him as his son..and Lucas thought of him at his father "
"First of all, that's what I´m trying to say. He thinks of him as Karen´s son. I can´t compete with that ghost if he sees her every time he looks at Lucas. And secondly, Lucas has a mother and a father. "
Bella opened her mouth to protest. Lucas had filled her in with the whole Dan story (skipping the Dan sleeping with Deb part) and she knew Gina couldn't really think that Lucas had to be in Tree Hill because Dan was there.
Gina saw Bella´s expression and she corrected herself.
"All right, he only has a mother. And he shouldn't be apart from her "
"And what am I doing with you, then?"
Gina gave her a weak smile. Bella and Keith were the only persons in which she let herself show some emotion.
"That's different, Cara. You really needed to get away. "
Bella almost felt like crying when she thought about all that had happened before she left Italy.
"But Gina...you don't know what returning to Tree Hill would mean to him. I have to talk to him"
"He won´t come back here. And you shouldn't drive at night"
"But..."
Just then Keith came from inside the house. He was holding a note and looking serious. Not angry, just serious.
"Bella, can I talk to you aunt?"
"Right. I have to go somewhere. "
Gina wanted to stop her but Keith´s face was worrying her. She didn´t thought Lucas would leave a note. She went inside the house with Keith and they could overhear Bella´s car leaving.
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AT TREE HILL
Nathan rolled on his bed. Summer nights. He hated them. No matter how hard he tried to keep the room cold, he was always sweating, he could never sleep.
He sat on the bed, uneasy. Dinner had been the same thing as always. Nothing. It was just time spent trying not to listen to his father while he talked next to him. He had said something about going to school tomorrow...Nathan wasn´t sure of what Dan had exactly said. He had been thinking of Haley the whole dinner.
Sometimes he felt things couldn´t be worse. And sometimes he was just...used to them Things were almost as before...before Lucas joined the team, before his family turned apart. There way of being together was pretty much the way they were now...except now they weren't pretending. He smiled. Things were as before Deb had decided to show concern for him...what a way of showing it...at least Dan was honest. All he cared was basketball and as long he played, he trained and he took all his crap things were predictably quiet..and tiring. Everything was worse with Dan when he was still dating Haley. But now he had backed off a little...he was just chasing him with training...
Haley...Dan had backed off that was the only good thing about not seeing her. The rest was just emptiness. An emptiness he had thought he had avoided, beaten. Now it was back.
Resigning to any hope of getting sleep he went to the computer. He went to Peyton´s page. If she was up, may be he could call her and asked her another time if today Haley had said something...may be told her why...he was always scared she would say Haley had met a new guy...
The web-cam was on. Peyton´s room was empty. ´May be she´s out´
But something in the picture caught his attention. Peyton had always been a freak when it came to her things while drawing scripts. After drawing she always put everything in order and she got mad if he took only one little pencil..but all her things were a mess on her a table. That wasn't like her. Especially if she wasn't at home.
He dialed her number. No answer. ¨May be it´s nothing but I´ll better check. I need to go out anyway´
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LUKE'S HOUSE
"Well...why did you leave so suddenly?" Karen was feeling tired of repeating her questions so many times.
"It's just..."
Karen shook her head with desperation.
"What's wrong with you, son?. First you want to leave, now you come back but you are just too angry to talk...was I such a terrible mother that I don´t even deserve an explanation? "
"It's not that, it's just.." His dialogue with Gina was something really hard to explain to his mother.
"Has something happened between you and Keith´s fiancé?"
Lucas hesitated.
"Well?" Karen was feeling tired again. That was like a questions-answer game. Lucas was telling with his face if she hit the truth. They weren't going anywhere. She noticed a change in his face. "What happened between you and her?"
"Not exactly between us. It would be more between you and her. "
Karen felt surprised by that statement.
"What do you mean?"
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AT CHARLESTON
Keith was showing Luke´s note to Gina. It just said
"Keith. Now that you decided to live with Gina. I think that it would be better for you and her to be alone for a while. You deserve your own family. I'm going back to mom. I´ll call you as soon as I get home. Love you
Luke"
Gina read the note cursing Luke inside her head. But she only said.
"Well if the kid felt that way...Why do you seem to be so angry with me?"
"I'm not angry. But of course you have something to do with this. "
"Why do you say that?"
"Have I ever told you about my brother?"
Gina sighed.
"Hundreds of times. He´s the father of the kid you love, the father of your great love's son, the owner of your shop...have I skipped anything? "
´The husband of the last girl I fu..but that's not something to tell her´ Keith said to himself. He just said a little angry.
"Sorry if I bored you too much with the details of my life"
Gina felt sorry. She took Keith´s hand.
"You don´t bore me, honey. I just think you have a trend of thinking too much of your brother and too little of yourself...and your life. You are here; he´s in Tree Hill...you´ll start a new life...why do you have to bring him?"
"You remind me of him. He had this ability to make people do what he wanted; even if they knew he was a jerk..."
"What do you mean when you say I remind you of him?"
"I think you can do the same thing. When I asked you to move here, you said you´d consider it if I asked Lucas to leave. I told you that wouldn't happen..."
"You make it sound as I don´t like Lucas. I do. I even let him be around Bella..."
"You´ve said lots of time that Bella can take care of herself."
"And she does. But Cesare told me to take care of her. Bella is strong but she had been through a lot and she doesn't need more troubles...especially with boys..."
"Back to you liking Lucas..."
"I never hide how I felt..but that doesn´t mean..."
"I know Lucas wouldn't leave without telling me."
"May be he didn´t want to say good bye."
"He knew he couldn't lie me about his reason to leave"
"It wasn't me, Keith. "
"So you said nothing to him..."
Gina hesitated. How much could she push it?
"He knows how I feel, I didn´t hide that when he asked me. And yes I talked to him about his mom, I asked him how he thought she was feeling and she would feel to learn he was living with a kind of step mom when his mom is alive and far away"
"What about Bella, then?"
Gina didn´t look at him.
"She's different. She needed to leave Italy"
Keith didn´t ask her why. Gina had insinuated something but he didn´t want to push it. Could Gina be saying the truth? It would be like Lucas to think about Karen´s feelings. And to avoid saying good bye to him. Still...he could sense something was wrong. The years he had spent treating Dan had given him an instinct about lies...and Gina...well Gina...
Gina smiled as he was reading his mind but wanted to leave that over.
"Keith..I want us to have a future. If you want Lucas in it we´ll ask him to come back. I feel you want him here to have Karen close in a way...and I don´t like that. I also have my ghosts and I just want to keep them away. I really would like to have kids of our own...wouldn´t you?"
Keith smiled weakly.
"I´ll talk to Lucas about this. But Gina...you´ve always knew a life with me included him."
"I did. And I can deal with that, I told you. But I can´t deal with you not being over Karen"
"I´m over Karen"
She went closer to him.
"Can you prove it?"
He took her in his arms; trying to avoid the feeling he had that something was wrong.
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FLASHBACK CHARLESTON RIGHT BEFORE LUCAS LEFT
Lucas was in the backyard waiting for Gina. Gina had told Keith she would move that day to his house. Both of them seemed to be really excited about it, Keith had asked Lucas to stay at home and help Gina with her stuff. So, he was waiting for Gina not very anxiously. He could sense how she felt about him. And in a way he couldn´t help thinking Gina was kind of right in the way she felt about Karen. Keith was clearly not over his mom. Every time Luke mentioned her by accident he seemed to be in pain. And he knew he hadn´t told Gina about Deb. In fact, Keith hadn´t said anything at all about Deb to anyone.
He was surprised when Gina joined him at the backyard. She wasn't carrying a suitcase or anything.
She smiled at him and he offered him a cigarette, while turning one on for her. Lucas couldn´t help thinking two things. One that Karen would probably kill her if she learnt that. And secondly that Keith was lucky. She was kind of hot for her age.
"So..you don´t smoke..."
He shook his head. She smiled again.
"Good for you."
She stood there in silence, making him feel even more uncomfortable. He knew she wanted to say something but as she didn´t start, he didn´t ask. They stood in silence and finally Gina broke it.
"Lucas...do you love Keith?"
"Of course" he couldn´t see where she was going. But he was sure she was going to try to make him leave. Well, she was wrong. He was there first and he had every right to be there.
"Listen..." she seemed to be thinking what she was going to say but Lucas knew she had thought it word by word...not in vain he was Dan´s son.
"Listen...I guess you know I think your uncle hadn´t forgotten his feelings for your mom"
Lucas couldn´t help thinking that the she had remarked the word uncle more than necessary. He still managed to answer.
"He seems to be happy with you and it´s dificult to get over some feelings but with your help he will. " he tried to sound nice and supportive even if he wasn´t very sure of what he was saying.
"Keith and I want the same thing " she spoke coldly, making a statement. Lucas looked at her surprised. She went on. "May be is not exactly a love story but I think I love him, and he needs someone like me and I need someone like him and we deserve to have our own family"
"I'm not trying to stop that."
"But you are. I'm not saying that that´s what you are trying to do but that's the result. He can´t stop thinking of your mom. Of what made things fail with her. How can I manage to make him forget about her if she calls every day? And it wouldn´t be fair to expect you not to talk to your mom."
"But he doesn´t even talk to her"
"That's for now. But what will happen when he starts asking you about her. Then he´ll talk to her again and then ..but that's not all Lucas. I'm sure Keith loves you, as his son. But he also loves that you are your mom´s son and that´s what he sees when he looks at you. She´ll never leave him unless you do"
Lucas felt angry.
"You can´t blame me for your own insecurity"
Gina laughed.
"That´s the least you could say about me. But think about it, you are being selfish. You are denying your mom her son...and that must hurt her believe me, I know how it feels. And you are denying Keith the opportunity to move on just because...what? You want to stay away from you father? Your mom lied once to you before leaving everything to take care of you?"
Lucas hesitated. First he hated the fact that apparently Keith had told everything to Gina. And secondly he couldn´t help wondering of what made Gina talk like this. But he answered angrily.
"Leave Dan and my mom out of this, you can´t know how she feels "
"Oh...can you?. Are you a mother? And do you think Dan will disappear just because you are not there? That he won´t be your father any more just because you live with Keith? Or perhaps is this about some girl you almost got pregnant before breaking her heart? She won´t disappear also.Your mom can´t be the strong woman Keith says she is if she told you to hide from your problems. "
Lucas didn´t know what to say. He wasn't hiding he repeated to himself. But for some reason that didn't sound as good as before.
"You just want things easier for you. "
Gina smiled quickly. "It always goes that way, Caro." she turned off the cigarette and turned to leave but before she faced Lucas "do whatever you want. But I won´t move here unless you are gone. If you don´t leave I´ll say that to Keith. He´ll probably say everything is over between us. Just think if that´s fair to him... or us..."
She left. Lucas remained outside for a while. Then he thought of Keith and how he´d been there for him his whole life. And how Keith and he had always thought Keith and his mom...
He packed as soon as he could, took all his money, wrote the note and left. Back to paradise. To Tree Hill.
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AT LUCAS'S HOUSE.
Luke finished telling Karen. Karen got immediately angry.
"We have to call Keith...that woman is.."
"What? At least she wants to be with him, she showed him he wanted to be with him and she wasn't lying". Luke had sounded more angry and upset that what had been his first intention. Karen looked hurt.
"What do you mean?"
"You broke his heart, mom. "
"That was never my intention."
"Really? And what were you thinking when you kissed him at the airport, before leaving to Italy? "
Karen couldn´t hide her surprise.
"He told you about that?"
"Mom..you don´t know what that man feels..or felt. He was happy as a puppy the day you were coming back. He was sure you two were starting a new life and you...threw sixteen years of being constantly by your side because he had had two beers? You were willing to take Dan back after he had asked you to abort me but you couldn't forgive Keith that he was too nervous to see you?"
"First, it wasn´t just the beers..I just realized..I had made a mistake. And about Dan..back then I loved him...I was never in love in Keith...I´m sorry I wasn´t but that´s the truth."
"And you didn´t mind kissing him...knowing what that meant to him..making him think even before that you two could have a future? "
Karen was getting angry. She looked at Lucas directly.
"So..when you started dating Brooke..you were just planning to hurt her. And let me remind you that you did far more than kissing with her. "
Lucas looked down. Here she had a point.
"I made a mistake. "
Karen took advantage of the hesitation in his voice. "We all make mistakes, Lucas. That´s the whole point..."
"Even Dan? "
"What do you mean?" she was expecting that, she knew Lucas wasn´t over that yet. She could almost swear that that was the reason that had made him leave.
"You were willing to take him back, but when he asked you to be my father you just couldn´t forgive him?"
"I knew this stupid custody thing was still bothering you!. Is that it? You wish you had grown up with Dan?"
"No!"
"Then, why are you so angry?"
"It's not the fact that you denied him custody. I think you were right at that. He's a jerk and he showed that over and over...especially with me. But it's the fact that I grew up thinking that he hated me...I grew up thinking that my own father hated me just because you were pissed at him...I think you could have told me..even after denying the custody just explained me that he had asked. I can't believe you thought it would be better for me to think he didn't want me"
Karen was frozen. The curious thing was that she had never thought her decision over. She knew she was right in keeping Dan apart from Luke. Nathan was a living proof of that. But at the same time she didn't want Lucas to hate Dan. She had always thought there must have been still something good in Dan. Even a shadow of the man she used to love. When she had learnt Dan had rescued him from the accident she had that feeling back. But Dan had made that feeling disappear really soon. Lucas's leaving was his fault and Karen would never forgive him that.
She sat on a chair, almost crying. Was she like Dan? Had she manipulated Keith and Lucas into thinking what she wanted? Was her son's leaving a punishment for that?
"Listen..I wasn´t just pissed. You have to put yourself in my place. I knew him, he didn´t like to lose...he wanted to abort you, he left me because I had refused. I spent all my time in labor trying to look at the door, expecting him to appear from one time or other...and he did...eight months later with a new wife and another kid..."
"And you.."
"Lucas, that´s not all...why do you think you have his name? He betrayed me twice...all that time I had been waiting for him, talking to him...Nathan was borne and he was still calling me making me think we would get married...and if he had custody...even half..Deb would have raised you... I just couldn't stand the idea. He had cheated on me with her. He had destroyed everything we had and he pretended to tell me how to raise you. And he also pretended...that he and she were your family...I just couldn't let that happen."
Lucas remained in silence. He had never thought on what his whole name thing meant. Dan sure was a great man. It takes a lot of courage to cheat on two pregnant girls.
"And why didn´t he insist?"
"I think he just wanted me apart from Deb, he was scared that if he got custody I could go and tell Deb why I had been waiting for him. They were married and he still kept his relationship with me...that couldn´t be good and I´m sure Deb still doesn´t know it. I don´t know why he kept the asking for custody in secret, maybe he´d never told Deb..he was going to tell her when he had you...that would be typical of Dan...Besides he hates losing and he had lost...so...he wouldn't talk much about it."
"So..I was just another basketball game for him"
Karen sighed. She was glad Lucas had wanted to talk about that but it was still too difficult for her.
"I guess deep inside that wasn´t all. May be he wanted to do the right thing...and that´s why I didn´t tell anyone else. There wasn´t right thing after what he´d done. The best for all of us was to be apart from him. Luke..may be I was selfish...I don´t know. I was young and scared and in love and angry...I´m sorry I didn´t let you have father...just remember it was Dan..if he had been another kind of person I would have never acted like that."
Karen was crying. Lucas hugged her.
"It´s ok, mom. I know you´ve always wanted the best for me" he pulled apart. "And may be now you understand that the best for Keith is to try to have a new life...away from us...".
Karen was feeling too emotional to argue. Besides, a part of her couldn´t help thinking that may be Lucas was right.
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SOME HOURS LATER...
The party was really boring. Brooke didn't know what was wrong with her but every boy she met seemed to be boring. Or ugly...or...god she wished she could get over Lucas. She heard the sound of a car and she saw everyone going to look at it. 'What can it be?' she wondered.
Bella parked her Ferrari and she was going to get out when a group of people surrounded it.
A guy went close to her.
"This is too much car for a girl, don't you need help driving it?"
Bella laughed. Then she looked at the boy who looked back with hope. She smiled at him.
"Sure get in.."
The guy had a hand on the car´s door when Bella added..
"But let me tell you first that the car and the girl are too much for you, jerk and I don't need any help driving it or kicking your sorry ass...so sure get in and you'll see..."
The guy looked surprised and went away. "Ímbecil (jerk) " Bella mumbled to herself. Now she didn't know what to do. She had asked Lucas a lot of questions...but not his exact address. She had hoped someone at the party could help. But now...
"Great answer!"
Bella looked up. A girl was smiling. May be she could help.
"You think so? Well, may be you can help..I'm looking for this guy..."
"If he's not a jerk then I can tell you he's not here. But give me a ride and tell me his name and I promise we'll find him. No good guy can escape from Brookie"
Bella was smiling but she stopped when Brooke said her name. Could it be? She couldn't know for sure May be it was another Brooke. And she needed the help...
"Just get in.."
Brooke smiled and got in the car.
"Who are you looking for...I know everyone that´s worth to know in Tree Hill...but with this car and being almost as gorgeous as me I would suggest you leave while you can..."
Bella laughed.
"That seems to be a good advice. But this guy..." Bella was still afraid of saying the name. This girl seemed to fit Luke´s decryptions of his Brooke. Brooke interrupted her.
"I have an idea! Let´s go to my house. May be we can call my friend Peyton, she needs to distract a little..and you can tell me why you are looking for this guy...he sure can wait... "
´Crap! Peyton was the histérica. So this Brooke IS Lucas's Brooke.´ She didn´t know what to say. But the best thing to do was to avoid telling her she was looking for Lucas. Besides, she was tired and it was really late...resting a little and talking would help her. Even if she knew the last thing Brooke could want was to talk about Lucas.
"All right, tell me where your house is"
Brooke smiled and told her. They arrived soon. Bella was hoping to rest and talk for a while when Nathan ran toward the car, not letting them get out. He didn´t even look at Bella.
"Brooke...where the hell were you? You didn´t have your cell...I´ve been looking for you everywhere..."
Nathan´s face scared Brooke.
"What´s wrong?"
"It's Peyton. "