MMMM...SPAGHETTI WESTERN: Yeh, that was completely random but I just had a big heaping plate of the stuff. Yum. So, I really don't know what to say about this chapter. It just explains the whole little scenario of why Milly is different than you remember. But you know...since her past was never explored in the series, it could have been just like I say! P Except that the hit was never called and of course she had a few more siblings than this. And there is a V/M fluff passage! Woot! Again, I apologize for like the billionth time for it being unbalanced fluffage lately. But it's never anything intentional. I promise. Anyway...I think I'm gonna go sit on the roof or something and listen to the coyotes. (my new house has a trap door in the attic...awesome!)

She sat Indian style on the hotel bed staring at her hands in her lap. The sun would be coming up soon, and that would bring a whole new set of problems. But for now, all that concerned her was the thoughts of the three people surrounding her.

The short woman that had oddly enough become a surrogate big sister over time, sat with worry in her eyes in a chair by the wall. On the floor next to the woman was the man whose beliefs had earned Milly's highest respect, and he seemed just as concerned. But of course, he was always concerned for everyone. The one closest to her heart, wasn't even in her field of vision. Sitting behind her on the bed with his back against the headboard, his eyes were unreadable. Too murky to relay his current train of thought.

Milly wasn't sure where to start, how to explain, or if certain details should be skipped. She'd never been in a tell-all situation like this. Mostly because anyone she'd ever been close enough to tell had already known. She'd never thought of these things as something to hide, but that still didn't mean she liked to talk about it. Might as well start with her home. "I don't know if you noticed or not. But on the way to the cemetery, you all passed a big abandoned house. I know it looks horrible now, but it used to be much nicer." She gave a sad smile. "A two story with beautiful white columns and a balcony across the second floor. The acres behind it are just dirt now. But they used to be big fields of farmland that always had a good harvest. Me and my siblings were all born in that house, and we never had a care in the world. From oldest to youngest it was my brother Caleb, my sister Rachel, my brother Evan, my sister Jessie, and then me. Our mom and dad were kind of a young couple but they didn't mind starting a big family. I'm sure it sounds naive to say everything was perfect, but it really was."

Meryl noticed Milly's eyes darken for a moment as she paused. But the tall girl continued before she could say anything.

"It was very late one night. I was only four, but I think Caleb was nine, Rachel was eight, Evan was six, and Jess was five..." She wasn't sure why she was giving their ages. Maybe because it had a different emotional weight that way. To let her friends understand how robbed she'd felt. How they'd all been so helpless. "But anyway, me and my sisters all shared a bed and Jess woke me up because Rachel was missing. So we went downstairs to look for her. It was very dark, and a man came up behind us. A gang had broken into the house. We didn't know it, but they'd already killed Rachel." Milly didn't give her friends time to have a reaction. She was afraid that if she didn't just say it all at once, she might get too emotional thinking about it and wouldn't be able to finish. "My memory gets hazy past that point, but I remember being chased and getting split up from Jess. Getting caught and beaten. One of them kicked me down and the spur of his boot made this scar across my cheek..." It was amazing how nice it had healed for the wound it had been. Just a thin horizontal slit of a scar when that whole side of her face had been so bloodied. "I guess because I was so small they thought it'd be a waste to use a bullet on me. They just roughed me up and left me for dead. I don't know why I didn't die. I was so busted up, I should have. I didn't wake up until a few weeks later. This couple that were good friends of my parents took me in and raised me. They were like grandparents to me and I loved them for it, but I just couldn't stay here with all the bad memories. And I knew that gang had killed my family for a reason...it had something to do with my dad's past and I wanted to know why. So I ran away when I was fifteen and I've never been back." She hung her head. "I guess that makes me a pretty bad person. These people cared about me and I just abandoned them."

Surprisingly it was Vash that spoke up first. "No, it doesn't. It doesn't make you a bad person. Everyone makes mistakes. As long as you realize that, it's never too late to make it right..."

Meryl looked down at him. It always amazed her when he did that. The transition from bumbling idiot, to completely serious and wise. His voice was so absolute. You just had to believe him. She still felt heartbroken though. How could anyone do something so horrible? How could Milly be so upbeat with all those memories lingering in the back of her mind? "Milly, I had no idea...but I'm sure the people, the ones that raised you...I'm sure they'd forgive you."

"But it's just been so long. They probably still live here. But I wouldn't know what to say if I saw them tomorrow."

"Just say you're sorry and go from there. They'll likely be so happy that you're okay, they shouldn't dwell too much on the way you left..."

Milly didn't seem all that sure. "I guess..."

The Typhoon stood up, taking Meryl by the hand. It's not that he didn't care, but it'd taken a lot for Milly to say what she did and now she needed someone to comfort her. And since Wolfwood wasn't exactly the emotional type, Vash knew he and Meryl would probably need to leave the room before the preacher could really open up. "Come on, Meryl. Milly needs some time alone now."

"Wait! Vash?" She looked helplessly back as she was dragged out the door.

Milly laughed a little as it clicked shut. After the sounds of a struggle faded into the distance, she looked back down at her hands.

"Did you ever find out why?"

His voice was so calm. Any other girl might actually take offense to it. As a false sign that he didn't care. But Milly understood. She was the weak one right now, so he had to be twice as strong. He was strong for her. "Yes." Milly sighed. "They were a band of mercenaries. Some kind of elite group. My dad was one of their best assassins. He just bounty hunted on the side..."

"Until he decided to quit."

"Well, he fell in love with my mother. The leaders had so much respect for him, they actually let him slide. But years later someone else took charge. A man that'd always had a grudge against my father. He ordered the hit anyway. He's the one that left this mark on my face..." She paused. There was only one more part to the story. Milly knew he wouldn't ask, but she wanted him to know anyway. To know everything about her. "The guy's name was Victor. I don't really know why he hated my dad, I guess they just had bad blood between them over something in their pasts. But I did end up finding him." After a long pause, she wiped at her eyes, getting emotional all over again. "I just couldn't think straight, Nick. I hated him so much. I knew it was wrong, but I actually tried to kill him...I wanted him to die."

"What stopped you?"

Milly realized she wasn't really confiding in her boyfriend right now, she was confessing to her priest. He was letting her do all the talking while he simply listened. Letting her cleanse her soul. Amazing. She didn't think he had it in him. To actually be who he said he was for once. She sniffled. "I don't really know...I pulled the trigger, but the gun never went off. I still don't understand. It was loaded but the hammer never fell. The only time one of my dad's revolvers has ever acted up. So he shot me instead and got away. That was the second time I should've died, but didn't. I lost a lot of blood, but the bullet missed my heart. I was in the hospital for awhile and it gave me time to think. I realized how lucky I was that my gun really hadn't gone off. My family loved me and they wouldn't want me to turn into some killer for their sakes. They'd just want me to be happy. So that's what I've tried to do since then. I put it all behind me and spent my last double dollars on a bus ticket to December. And that's how I met Meryl, Mr.Vash, and you." She stopped, suddenly coming to a realization. That's right...she had them now. Her happiness was here with him and the others. She didn't have to look any farther. Milly smiled a little. "Should I put a quarter in the confessional now?"

The lighthearted tone re-emerged. "For such a pretty girl? Nah, it's on the house."

She cocked an eyebrow. Yeah right. For one thing, her eyes were probably so red from crying. "Sorry, Mr.Priest...even I can't believe you on that one."

"Huh?"

"Farm girls aren't that pretty. Especially ones that have been crying..."

He blinked. God, she was so innocent. She still had the mindset of youth. No one had bothered to tell her she'd become one hell of a beautiful woman. "Milly, you can't really think that." He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her to him. "Besides, you aren't just a farm girl anymore. You're a woman." She looked up at him and he took her chin in his hand. Wolfwood smiled down into those sad eyes. "You're my woman." As he leaned down to kiss her, he couldn't help but see the parallel. Was the past really trying to repeat itself? A mercenary had fallen in love with a country girl in this town before...with less than a fairy tale ending. The nightmare he'd had on the bus, returned to his mind as he laid her down on the sheets, kissing her a little harder. Was it really wrong for someone like him to pursue someone like her? Did God really punish any demon that dared to crave for an angel?

"I can't believe how strong she is...to just put something like that behind her."

Vash rubbed his itching face harder against the pillow. "I'm sure she thinks about it more than you know. But yeh, I think being super tough is just an insurance girl qualification"

Meryl couldn't stop herself from asking. "What the hell are you doing?"

"My forehead itches."

"Then scratch it dumbass!"

"I'm trying!" He moved closer, rubbing his face on her shoulder.

She tried to push him away. "Dammit! Can't you be normal for one stupid second?"

Vash smiled rubbing harder. "Behold! The power of friction!"

"You're such a freak! Get away from me!"

He grinned, snuggling in close. "But you gotta admit, you aren't sad anymore...are you?"

"Huh?" Meryl blinked. "You mean that was all a plot?"

"Well, my forehead really was itching. In fact..." His eyes went crazy. "NOW MY WHOLE HEAD ITCHES!"

She screamed as he attacked her with that broom hair of his. "What are you trying to do? Poke out my eyes?"

Vash laughed. "Now why would I want to do that? Then you couldn't be awed by my beauty. And you'd always be running into stuff. And I'd have to get you a cane, but then you'd probably just beat me with it whenever you heard me coming. So maybe we could train a Thomas to carry you around..."

Meryl's eyebrow twitched. Should she? Would it make him shut up?

"But then you'd probably poison your Thomas because you'd feed him detergent instead of grain. Because you were blind and they don't make bag labels in Braille, and..."

The short girl planted a fierce kiss, successfully ending his incessant rambling. And she had intended to stop right there, but was surprised when he didn't exactly let it. After a little more, Meryl pulled back, putting her finger over his lips. Even though they were both getting more accustomed to being a little physical every now and then, she was still doubtful of what kind of staying potential this relationship really had. "Do you care about me, Vash?"

He cocked an eyebrow. "Mmm?" She removed her finger so he could speak again. He looked confused. "Of course I do. Why?"

"Well I know you care, but I mean...not the same way you worry about our friends though, right? Do you care about me as more than that?"

She was so serious all the sudden. He could tell this was very important to her. Vash hesitated. He wished it could be that simple. To just fall in love with a woman and settle down to live out their lives together. But how could it ever really work? He'd surely outlive her. The only way Vash had been enjoying he and Meryl's closeness over the last few months was by choosing to ignore that one painful fact. He wanted her love, but then again he didn't. It wasn't fair to her. "Meryl, I haven't been this close to anyone in a long, long time. And I do want to stay with you." He put his hand against her cheek, his eyes becoming determined in what he was fixing to say. "I want to love you...but I'm afraid of what might happen."

Her stormy eyes went wide at the 'L' word. Vash thought he was falling in love? "I don't understand..."

He searched for the right words. "It's just...my life is complicated. When I open my heart to people, they only get put in danger...I've already lost so much. I don't want to lose anyone else." A few angry tears began to sting at the back of his eyes at that last thought.

"Vash, when you really care for someone...you accept all of them. The bad and the good. I want to be here for you no matter what. I can live with the risks. And if something bad did happen to me, it wouldn't be your fault. I have free will, and this is my choice." She smiled. "I want to stay by your side. And as for love..." Meryl gave a sly glance up at him. "I think I fell for you a long time ago."

He stared at her in complete awe. "You love...me?"

She smirked. "I know...I don't hide it very well do I?"

Vash grinned wide, then pulled the short girl into a celebratory kiss. There was always hope. As long as there was a future, there would always be hope for them.