Authors Note: No, I but cannot, do not, will not ever own thou, my dearest Inu-Yasha
If you're wondering about the weird fancy stuff up above it's because I'm watching some historic movie called Amadeus… It's about the life of Wolfgang Mozart. It's funny, they all have the big white hair and stuff…and its three hours and a half XP. Two hours to go… anyways, I'm reviewing my outline and according to the outline we should have at the least 5 more chapters. Now this chapter won't be entirely what you were thinking of, and now that Inu-Yasha has helped Kagome discover she is hiding herself she is about to become the Kagome we love and know.
I am really excited with this chapter, I don't know, but I've been writing while watching the movie and my writing, has a more mature outlook. It seems I have suddenly learned how to write this way. I cannot say that it will be this way every chapter because I'm pretty sure it's just the movie. But I'd really like to know what you think of the writing.
Oh yes, and I was wondering if you believe there should be less kissing? Just tell me in the review. Oh and this chapter is actually a tiny bit longer then usual.
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Chapter 21: Incomprehensible Betrayal and Lust
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Kagome yawned as the morning sun tattooed across her face. Her eyes slowly fluttered open. She turned to the clock at her bedside table to see it was 6. It was July and the sun was warm, warning to bring storms from the heat. But the sky was clear. Kagome lazily got ready in the white kimono to show her pure, blissful mood. She soon went to Rin's room where she helped her get ready. Shortly afterwards she and the girl were heading down to the Dining room.
"Good morning Sesshomaru-Sama." Kagome said in a light voice, not a playful 'Lord Sesshomaru', but just her simple Sesshomaru-Sama. That was something Sesshomaru would notice.
"Good morning Miss Kagome-San" Sesshomaru responded back for the first time. Everyone looked up from the table to look at him. Kagome smiled.
"Arigato Gozaimasu… my Lord." Kagome said joyously and good-naturedly.
Jaken rolled his eyes and went back to eating while Rin beamed at Sesshomaru and Kagome before eating again. Kagome and Sesshomaru just stared at each other from different ends of the table.
"Kagome-San… May I see you in my office after breakfast?" Sesshomaru said almost as an afterthought. Kagome kept on smiling though. Maybe in her first few days she would have been nervous, even last week she would have assumed the worst. But now, there was trust between the two. And now, Kagome could tell Sesshomaru's mood, and she wasn't the least bit worried at the moment. Sesshomaru was in fact, in his own way, happy and just as blissful as Kagome herself.
"Yes my Lord." Kagome nodded and went back to eating, as did Sesshomaru.
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Kagome got up as Jaken escorted Rin to Kyoko. Sesshomaru walked up to her and with a calm 'Come.' Kagome followed Sesshomaru down to his office. Sesshomaru went to sit at his desk as Kagome bowed. Sesshomaru was surprised that considering they're new found equality Kagome would still bow before him.
"You may sit." Sesshomaru said elegantly.
"Thank you, Sesshomaru-Sama, now you have something to talk to me about?"
"Yes, last night… when you came back from your quarters with your friends… you had been crying… why?"
Kagome looked surprised, she looked down nervously.
"You knew… I had gotten in a fight with Inu-Yasha. He brought up why I am where I am. Though I am not ashamed of where I am I finally realized that through Inu-Yasha's decision to be with Kikyou, my fate had been decided. My hate of Inu-Yasha's decision led me to you, to where I am."
"I see… you should not allow my brothers stupid actions affect you."
Kagome looked up, hurt by Sesshomaru's words.
"How could you say such a thing? Inu-Yasha is my friend."
"A friend who let you down. A friend who allowed you to suffer for his own foolish desires, I do not think this is the kind of person who could be called a friend."
Kagome got up, totally angered with Sesshomaru.
"I cannot agree with you."
Sesshomaru got up, not ready to back down from anything.
"But you will." He said, not liking to be defied. He showed a hint of anger. "Didn't you hear the compliments last night? All the men at that party yearn you for. To them you are beautiful, smart, modest and kind. To them you are perfect. Someone such as yourself deserve better friends then people like Inu-Yasha… Hanyou's."
Kagome squinted in anger finally realizing what Sesshomaru thought of her.
"So that's it? You say how all the men believe so… and what about you? I can now see that the only reason you took me was to show me off. To show that you had in your possession the perfect woman. But I won't be anyone's possession. I am not a trophy. And as for Hanyou's… I could be considered as one. I was a human, remember?"
Kagome was so mad she started to pick up things from around the room and throwing them at Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru was taking it all calmly, easily dodging the flying objects. She was right, he did think about her that way, beautiful, smart, modest and kind. And she was right, that was what he was how he thought of her in the begging she was the perfect mate. She was a trophy, but that was before, not now. Now, she was beautiful. Not only on the outside but also on the inside. He liked Kagome for who she was. Once he had grown fed up with Kagome's tantrum he grabbed the last book as she had gotten tired and in the blink of an eye was now holding her wrist to stop her from throwing the other book in her hand. His other hand was at her waist. He pulled her close. He knew her weakness, he knew she was in love with him, and maybe he could use that to his advantage.
'How could only you make me shiver at your touch?'
He held her. He held her until her breath regulated into normal heart beats. As soon as this happened her heart soon quickened again. In fear. Kagome had just finally realized what she had done. The book in her hand dropped to the royal blue carpet. Nothing but silence surrounded the two of them. Kagome started to cry and fell back into Sesshomaru. Her hand slowly lowered while Sesshomaru's own hand stayed at her wrist. Sesshomaru could smell her fear; he could smell her uncertainty and remorse. Kagome started to shake as she cried.
"I… I am unworthy to work for you. I am so sorry." Kagome said between sobs. "I am so unworthy."
"Miss Higurashi." Sesshomaru said stiffly only making Kagome quiver even more. "I cannot see how you can get so upset about someone like my brother. But I can see how you may get upset about being seen as an object. I want to assure you that… I do not think of you as an object." He said, his voice softening as he went on. His hand slowly moved from her wrist to her waist. He leaned down and breathed into her ear. "You are not to be kept as an item, though I shall not allow any other man to have you except me."
Sesshomaru moved his lips from her ear to her neck where they made contact with her bare skin. Using his mouth Sesshomaru slowly massaged Kagome's neck, noticing her tears were gone and the tenseness in her muscles were now also gone. Kagome just stood there, helpless in the hold of the one she cared about. Kagome was surprised that Sesshomaru could turn her rage to fear and then to calm desire. No one could ever do that, no one had ever shown her the line and no one had ever calmed her down or pacified her needs. But Sesshomaru knew, how to appease her. This made Kagome realize, that Inu-Yasha was wrong. He was so very wrong. True, Sesshomaru might not have known how angry Kagome could get, but Kagome wasn't holding in any anger. She was not angry with Sesshomaru. Only once had she ever been angry with him. And she had vented that anger. No, she respected him, Sesshomaru knew her. He knew what would make her mad and what to do to sooth her. He knew her, and yet he still kept her around. He did care for her. And Kagome could now believe Sesshomaru's acclamations. He did not see her as an object.
Kagome slowly leaned her head back to where Sesshomaru was kissing her neck. Sesshomaru's mouth glided to Kagome's lips where his tongue sought Kagome's own tongue. Kagome suddenly pulled away with a gleam in her eye. Sesshomaru stared at Kagome confused by her actions.
"Sesshomaru-Sama! You are always in this office, why don't we… just go outside?"
Sesshomaru stared at Kagome bewildered at her statement.
"I guess we could, I could get Kyoko to watch Rin." Sesshomaru said uncertainly.
"Come then!" Kagome said smiling. "Let's go!"
Kagome grabbed Sesshomaru's hand and led him out into the hall where Sesshomaru met up with Kyoko, informing her that she would be taking care of Rin the rest of the day. Kagome then grabbed him again and led him outside into the light. Kagome let go, ran ahead, and turned back to look at him.
"Follow me…there's a place I have found with Rin that I think you'll enjoy!"
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Inu-Yasha walked into Kaede's hut smiling. Kaede smiled back at him.
"So ye have seen Kagome?" Kaede asked as she fixed some herbs.
"Yeah, she's doing great, she seems happy. She was actually Sesshomaru's escort."
"And this does not upset ye?"
"No, I am actually surprised. I dunno. I just think that Kagome and me are just good friends. I want what's best for her, and she seems happy. Besides. I chose Kikyou and Kagome should have a chance to do what makes her happy… So where's Kikyou? Is she around?"
"That is very good of you Inu-Yasha, I think you are actually becoming a man. But I am sorry to say I havn't heard from my sister since you left. She has been leaving and coming whenever she pleases."
"Hmmm, that's odd."
"Aye, indeed."
"Well I guess I'll go and find out if I can find her."
"Aye." Kaede said knowingly, nodding her head.
Inu-Yasha just headed outside. Sango was off somewhere with Shippou while Miroku was up to his evil deeds with the women in the village. Inu-Yasha just couldn't see how the women did not weary of the same lines and propositions. Inu-Yasha pricked up his ears when he caught a whiff of Kikyou; he smiled and ran off to the direction of the scent. Unfortunately, when he got closer another smell that he knew caught his nose. As he approached the scene he noticed Kikyou talking to someone. Inu-Yasha looked closer to notice the person she was talking to was none other then the evil incarnation hanyou Naraku.
"Naraku, I do not care for Inu-Yasha. Inu-Yasha was a mere little girl's dream. I am alive again and do not wish to play around any more. Inu-Yasha has changed and so has my taste. Naraku, your power is so appealing. I have spent my life taking care of the greatest power known and yet I was never able to use it for myself." Kikyou said practically bowing before Naraku. Naraku smiled and lifted her face.
"You can help me. You can kill Inu-Yasha. And then your power will be more then you can dream of. I can help you achieve that power." Naraku sneered almost knowing Inu-Yasha was there and was mocking him.
Inu-Yasha watched helplessly as Naraku leaned down and kissed Kikyou.
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Kagome knelt down by the small stream she had led Sesshomaru to. She dipped her hand in the water and smiled as the water cooled her hand. Sesshomaru sat near her merely watching her.
"Sesshomaru? Why do you never express your emotions? Not that you have to… I can see past your façade. I know how you feel at the different times so you don't need to try and hide it from me. I know when you're happy… or mad or sad." Kagome said curiously. Sesshomaru stared at her thoughtfully, her question amazing him. No one had ever tried to ask him anything. He had never talked to anyone.
"Because emotions get you killed. Take my brother for example. He doesn't think. He lets his emotions cloud his judgment. Emotions are a weakness. You either choose emotions or life. That's where you divide humans and demons. Humans would rather die for the people they love then keep themselves alive. It's stupid."
Kagome stared at him attentively, shaking her head slowly. She crawled over to him slowly until she was right in front of him. She was right by his face and she looked him in the eye before smiling.
"It is better to die sooner after loving, then to die later, never to have loved or been loved before." She whispered, like a secret for only his ears and her own. Sesshomaru let out a small grin, the only smile Kagome had ever seen that had not been caused by the love of almost killing his brother.
Sesshomaru stared into her honey brown eyes, only to see the pure innocence of a young woman. She was right. Her words were truthful. Could it mean… that he, Lord Sesshomaru of the Western Lands… was falling in love? Was this love that he was feeling worth dieing over? He thought about it for a moment before running his hand through Kagome hair and letting his hand rest on her cheek. Kagome rubbed her head into his palm and began to purr, her tail swaying gracefully. Kagome actions only made Sesshomaru grin even more. Kagome eyes danced, appeased with her work. She had gotten the young Lord to smile. She closed her eyes as Sesshomaru leaned forward to whisper into her ear.
"If you know my emotions… I don't think there would be anyone else that would need to know I have any. And I guess you are right, I could die right now, and it wouldn't matter. Because I have lived."
As he pulled away Sesshomaru's cheek brushed against Kagome's. He went to kiss her but he was interrupted by a loud thunder and a crash of lightning. Kagome laughed as she and Sesshomaru both looked up into the sky and the rain came down. The sky had clouded over when they weren't paying attention and the clouds had brought gentle summer rain. Kagome closed her eyes, holding out her palms and lifting her head to the sky, not noticing her white kimono turning opaque. But she didn't care. She was caught off guard when the hand in her hair came back and she was pulled into another one of her and Sesshomaru's passionate kisses. Once Kagome pulled away she noticed that she wasn't the only one wearing a new opaque kimono. Sesshomaru's top was soaked and sticking to his chiseled abs. She watched as Sesshomaru stood up and held out his hand to help Kagome up. Kagome took his hand and was quickly on her feet, face to face with Sesshomaru, and pretty close at that. Kagome stared into Sesshomaru's two golden orbs, which seemed to be glowing, though it must have be the flash of the lightning she supposed. Kagome's lips were once again close to Sesshomaru's, but Sesshomaru had had enough for one day and being out in the rain didn't appease him. He would have liked to kiss her again; in fact he'd love to. But he was afraid. He was afraid he'd shown too much of himself that day so far. Though it was true what Kagome said. He would not die for love. He couldn't. He couldn't just die.
"Come on, we wouldn't want you to get sick. Now would we?" He said putting up another wall around himself. The same boring tone coming back. Kagome nodded, and once he turned his back she frowned.
'Oh, Sesshomaru why can't you trust me? Why can't you trust me not to break your heart? I would never let you die… of a broken heart…"
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Authors note:
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Wee! OMG! That was the COOLEST chapter EVER! I'm so excited about this one and I can't wait until you guys review.
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Quotes of the Chapter
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Ok, I have quite a few this time around… forgive me! But they are the best!
How could only you make me shiver at your touch?' (Okay, this was a flashback from last chapter where Kagome was talking to herself about how she felt about Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru had overheard. I think it's sweet to have this in here.)
"You are not to be kept as an item, though I shall not allow any other man to have you except me." (It's so cute! I can't breathe it's so cute…I just want to scream but I can't XD it's 2:00am and my rents are sleeping upstairs…)
"It is better to die sooner after loving, then to die later, never to have loved or been loved before." She whispered, like a secret for only his ears and her own. (I don't know who came up with a similar quote that this is loosely based upon but anyways I put the words together on my own, the story inspired me.)
"If you know my emotions… I don't think there would be anyone else that would need to know I have any. And I guess you are right, I could die right now, and it wouldn't matter. Because I have lived." (I think this is so sweet. If you don't understand it I won't say the meaning in the story I'll tell you here. He feels he has loved so he could die and it wouldn't matter because he'd die but he has already loved. Also at the beginning he's saying that Kagome is the only one who he really wants to know his emotions.)
"…And the clouds had brought gentle summer rain." (AHAHAHA! Nivea commercial XD)