Chapter Six: In Which A Totally Rockin' Epolouge Is Written
SAM AND MERRY continued to live inside Bob's tummy. Since they could not be fully digested, they passed the next few decades playing solitaire and learning ballet, which always gave Bob an upset stomach.
FRODO AND GANDALF kept on making prank phone calls. Their most frequent victims were Legolas and Gimli, were were living together in San Fransisco. Frodo later became an actor and starred in the movie "The Amazing Adventures of Elijah Wood"
Gandalf went on to play Dumbledore in the Harry Potter movies and Obi Wan Kanobi in the Star Wars Trilogy.
LEGOLAS AND GIMLI continued living in San Fransisco. Their hobbies include gay pride parades and making out. They're still waiting for gay marriages to be legalized so that they can be forever united in freaky love.
PENELOPE ended up married to Donald Trump as his 73rd wife. But, she was later dumped for J-Lo. She is currently dating the Pilsbury Dough Boy.
BigMamaOrc, LilOrcBro, OrcPotato, and SuperSexySuruman never got off their computers, even after death.
BILLY AND THE DRUNK ELF remained dead.
RALPH THE CHIHUAHUA AND FRANK THE ORC also remained dead.
BERT THE ORC is sort of pointless to have an epilogue for, because I already told you what happened to him in Chapter Four.
HARRY POTTER AND LUKE SKYWALKER eventually got jobs as underwear models.
They call themselves "The Super Dooper Sexy Underwear Trio," despite the fact that there's only two of them.
THE OTHER HOBBITS continued being confused, stupid, and short.
PIPPIN got a paternity test done, and it turned out that his real father was Mr. T. He is currently married to four super models and a horse. He became the manager of Taco Bell and the supreme ruler of the whole world, but he decided to quit and become a professional Elvis impersonator.
BOB kept on being weak, stupid, and butt ugly. That is, till he discovered steroids, his brain, and plastic surgery. He was later named the sexiest man alive, despite the fact that he's technically an Orc. But, one thing has stayed the same about our humble hero:
he's still hungry and likes Chihuahua stew.
THE END!