Author's Note: I believe this is my longest chapter yet. Yaaay. Enjoy it, all. And review, eh? By the way, sorry if there are lots of mistakes, I didn't really proofread this chapter.

where-my-heart-resides: Whoa, man. I do fear your rath! Please do not say "Um" anymore. I reviewed! Lookit! Updateage.

Jade Higurashi: AH! You rule. I didn't expect anyone to catch that Crucible reference. My englsish class also just finished reading the play. A little joke we would do is to say "I saw so-and-so with the devil" and when ever anyone would say that I would always respond by saying "fuck you, man." We all thought that would definitely assure everyone that I wasn't a witch.

Chapter 25: Drunk!Hermione, ghost!Ron, and scene!Harry. They are all so good at insulting and kicking assssss.

Disclaimer: This Harry Potter thing? Not mine.

"Well, Elvis," said Hermione. "The whole world is dying to know. Are you dead?"

"Huh?" said Ron. "I'm Ron, not Elvis."

Hermione slapped her forehead with the palm of her hand in a classic internet palmface move. "Duh. But are you dead?"

If this was a movie there would be have been a dramatic zoom-in on Ron's face. "Yes!" he screamed.

"Noooo!" screamed Ginny. "My only brother is dead!" She broke into hysterical sobs and fell to the floor. "Damn you, Wal-Mart! Damn you!"

Harry sat down to comfort her. "Gin, chill out. You have five other brothers."

"Oh, yeah," she said. "I forgot about all those other people. Ugh, why couldn't Percy have died? I fucking hate that git."

"Mmm, gin. Tasty," said Hermione.

"What?" asked George.

"I am drunk!Hermione," she explained.

"Ronnie poo is dead," said Fred. "I miss Ronnie poo."

"Don't worry," said Ronnie poo. "I'm a ghost now!"

"Yaaay," cheered all the little children.

Ghost!Ron did a jig. "Dance, dance," he said.

"Oh, silly Fall Out Boy. Misery does love you," said Harry. He was still patting a crying Ginny.

Ghost!Ron slapped Harry. "You are an idiot."

"Hey," said scene!Harry. "Just because you guys haven't gotten in touch with your emo side doesn't mean I haven't."

"You are so scene," said ghost!Ron.

It looked like a fight was about to go down. Ron's fists were ready for hitting. Harry's fists were ready for hitting. Luckily, they were interrupted by George. "Hey!" George yelled as he came running down the aisle. "Snow day!" he yelled.

"What?" said Hermione.

"We are being attacked!" yelled George as he crashed into a wall as his way of stopping.

"By what?" asked a confused Fred. Everyone was confused.

"I already said, by a snow day! We are being attacked by a snow day!" yelled George.

"Oh, no!" said Ron. "We are all going to die. Well, I mean, I'm not going to. Cause I am already dead and whatnot. But you suckers are going to die like crazy."

"Damn," said Harry. "I never thought a snow day would be the death of me. I always kind of figured Voldie would kill me. Or I would die in a freak terrorist attack at a royal wedding."

Drunk!Hermione giggled to herself. "Dynasty is such crazy shit."

"Well, what are we going to do?" questioned Ginny. "How are we going to survive this?"

George sadly shook his head. "There is no possible way to survive a snow day attack." The gang felt all of their hope seep out of them. "Wait!" Everyone felt their hope make a jump to come back to life. "There might be one way we could survive this thing," said George.

"Head and Shoulders shampoo?" guessed Ron.

"Uh, no. I'm not really sure if my idea will work," explained George. "This was something I came up with for December 22, 2012 but it could work for our current situation."

"We all get naked?" guessed Harry.

"Uh, no. First thing we have to go is eat a lot of marshmallows. That part will be easy enough; there are quite a lot of marshmallows in this here store. Next we have to go up to the snow day and yell at him."

"What do we yell, George?" asked Ginny.

"Insults," he said.

"Insults?"

"Yes, Ginny. Insults."

"Well, we rule at that," said Ron.

"Fuck yeah," said his drunk lover. Then she giggled.

"Why are you giggling?" demanded Fred. "This is a serious situation."

"Fuck yeah is just such a funny expression," explained Hermione.

The rest of the gang thought about it.

The rest of the gang giggled.

Then, for once, George took charge. "Now! Let's go eat those damn marshymallows!"

Everyone ripped open all of the bags of marshmallows and started roasting them over the magical bonfire that had magically appeared.

"Let's sing a marshmallow roasting song," suggested Ginny.

"Marsh of the mallow. They are so marshy and so mallowy. Yummy in my tummy. Always so squishy. Always so tasty. They make me think of gooooooodness," sang Harry.

"Beautiful," complicated Ginny.

Harry nodded. "I kick ass," he said then bowed.

"Man, you kick so much ass you could like major in ass kicking," said Hermione. Then she fell over and she was so drunk she fell right into the bonfire!

"Oh, noes!" said Ron. "She can't die! Well, she could. But I wouldn't like that."

"Plus she would be all burny and gross," Ginny pointed out.

"Yes! She'd be really gross to kiss," said Ron.

"So, we pull her out of the fire?" asked Fred.

Ron nodded. "That sounds good," he said.

Fred and George pulled Hermione out of the fire as Ron floated above supervising. "Just a little to the left," guided Ron.

"We aren't hanging a bloody portrait," said Fred.

"Because that would be one ugly portrait," said Ginny.

"You!" Hermione drunkenly pointed at the female Weasley. "You is a bitch!"

George clapped his hands together once, trying to get everyone's attention. "Okay, guys. I think we have eaten enough marshmallows."

"Good," said Harry. "Because I feel like I am going to barf." Good thing he felt like that. That proved how in touch with his feelings he was. Because Harry did indeed barf.

"Gross!" squealed Ginny.

"Come on, guys. Let's head out, it's insult time!" directed George.

If this was a movie there would be a long shot of Fred, George, Ginny, Ron, Harry, and Hermione walking in a line, slowly and to gooood music, getting all ready to fight off the evilness.

All around them, people were going crazy. The customers were running around screaming, clearly they did not know what to do.

"Well, hello, children," said a big booming voice.

The Six turned around. "Where did that come from?" asked Fred.

"Over there." George pointed. "It's the snow day and it is trying to eat us all."

"Well, it ain't gonna eat us. Cause I am gonna eat it!" slurred Hermione.

"We can take you," said a menacing Harry.

"Yeah, bitch," added Ginny.

"Well, then," said the snow day of evilness. "Let us duel."

"Fine, I'll start." Ron stepped forward to make the first insult. "If you were a teenage girl and you weren't bulimic, I would tell you to start throwing up right away because you are just that fat."

"Ooooh. Burn," said the rest of the team.

"That was nothing," said Snow Day. "If you were a teenage girl… no one would be able to tell the difference."

Fred stepped up next. "You are stupider than Michael Kelso and not even close to being as pretty as him."

The dueling went on for hours. No one knew when the end would come or what the eventual outcome would be, but The Six knew they had to keep fighting. Snow Day was weakening, maybe he would die soon. We can only hope.

Hermione burst into drunken tears after one of Snow Day's insults and Ginny couldn't take it anymore. "You suck!" she yelled at Snow Day. There was a moment of total silence, even the hidden customers were completely silent. Everyone's eyes were on Snow Day… and he burst into tears. "I want my mommy!" he yelled as he popped away to go visit Dr. Phil.

Wal-Mart burst into cheers. "YESS!" screamed Harry. "I love you, Gin!"

Fred and George hoisted Ginny onto their shoulders and paraded her around the store. The Wal-Mart band played and the President of the world declared December 8 Ginny Day.

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Annie Note: Wellls? Don't ya love me? REVIEW, BITCHES!