Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Meh.
Hazardous Sanity
Chapter Fourteen: Questions And Answers
Gaze into her killing jar I'd sometimes stare for hours.
She even poked the holes so I can breathe.
She bought the last line.
I'm just the worst kind.
Of guy to argue.
With what you might find.
And for the last night I lie.
Could I lie with you?
The JetSet Life Is Gonna Kill You by My Chemical Romance
--..--..--
Dumbledore smiled at her gently. His eyes were not twinkling. "Ms. Weasley, perhaps you can tell me the story from the very beginning?"
Ginny inhaled deeply and nodded. "You see, sir, it all started with Parvati Patil showing off her new bracelet…" She continued on, describing the jealousy and anger that had pounded in her veins. When she got to her first dreamless- yet terrifying- night, the Headmaster stopped her.
"So it was your fury and envy that renewed the connection… Go on."
Ginny continued on, detailing the rage that followed her and never seemed to waver. The guiltless stealing and lying. She spoke about the continuous dreamless nights and when she heard of the murders from the Headmaster's speech, she flinched when she heard the name "Lana Gwen". She told him about the nights she woke up screaming.
Ginny recalled waking up to shrieks of horror from her dorm mates and seeing Amber Rodger's body. She recalled thinking about Fred without George and shuddering. She remembered her ex-girlfriend dying and telling Hermione she was gay. She remembered Harry, looking so depressed and so small.
All the while she talked the Headmaster nodded and seemed deep in thought. Sometimes he gave her an encouraging smile, sometimes he didn't. It really didn't matter anyway. Ginny was just glad to be able to finally get it out to someone.
Ginevra finally got to the part of her strange, but real, dream and Dumbledore was looking, if possible, even fiercer with interest. She could imagine the wheels turning in his great mind and she felt the need to tell him every detail of every event- with the exception of sex with George and Parvati. Ginny couldn't bring herself to tell him that after the difficulty of telling him her sexual preference.
She told him of Harry. How Harry knew all that was going on and told her things that even she hadn't realized. When Harry came up, so did the Headmaster's head so quickly she was surprised it hadn't fell from his elderly shoulders.
"Then Hermione attacked Pansy Parkinson for insulting me and threatening Harry and Snape took her away…"
"Yes, yes," the Headmaster said, not unkindly. "I remember that day with Ms. Granger."
Ginny nodded and continued. She related to him the discussions soon after, along with her brother's suicide and running in the corridors after having a row with Hermione. Which wasn't much of a lie, really.
"… and Pansy tripped me in the hall and began threatening me…"
Ginny then told him about Draco Malfoy showing up and explained in detail every single word he said. She didn't like Malfoy. She didn't trust him. But she continued on with the boring and stressful day until she fell asleep in her own dorm room (which was now fit for human habitation).
"Then," Ginevra said in a soft voice, shuddering softly, "I was in the dark."
"The dark?" Dumbledore inquired in an equally soft voice. It was soothing and consoling.
"Yes…" she whispered. "I was in the dark. Then I wasn't. There was a screen in front of me and I couldn't move. It showed me… horrible things."
"What kinds of things, Ginny?"
She hadn't even registered the use of her first name. Her eyes were glazed over in remembrance of the terrifying moment.
"It was Hermione, lying in a pool of blood. Then… a voice came up behind me and told me… bad things were going to happen to me."
The room was buzzing in silence until she next spoke.
"More pictures came. Fast, but not too fast. I saw myself being chucked into an Azkaban cell. I saw my family being scorned at Hermione's funeral and being turned away. Then I saw…"
Dumbledore, for the first time in their meeting, sounded urgent. "What did you see, Ms. Weasley?"
Ginny shuddered with a sob. She hadn't realized she was crying. "I saw Harry."
"He had his wand to my head. There were dark marks everywhere behind him. There was blood and death and silent screams…" Ginny sobbed again, willing herself not to throw up.
"And then what happened, Ms. Weasley?" Dumbledore prompted, sounding now more urgent than ever.
Ginny's eyes opened wide. "And then the picture moved."
"Harry had a white mask in his hand and I watched it before the picture blew up."
"Blew up?"
"The screams and blood blew up from the picture. Blood was raining down everywhere and people were screaming and yelling and laughing and crying. They were fighting. Harry spoke to me. He was holding a wand to my head and speaking to me."
"He said that I ruined his life. A tear fell from his eye. His eyes… They were like a cat's eyes. They looked almost normal except for the shape and… they shone red. He said- he said that it was my fault and that I would understand. Then he- he put his wand his head and-" Ginny let out a strange, cat like sound. It was sad, almost unearthly.
"He- he killed himself!"
Then Ginny broke down completely.
I never used to cry. Before this I was so much stronger…
As if hearing her thoughts, Dumbledore said "War weakens us in some places, but strengthens us in others. Some people find that they are stronger than they themselves have ever guessed."
Ginny knew she had to continue. She had no other choice. She took a deep breath.
"All right. Then everything broke apart. It felt like I was falling and being spun and pulled and pushed… Then I fell into reality, I guess."
Ginny was suddenly feeling very exhausted.
"I was in a carpeted room. I didn't need to look around to know I was in Hermione's dorm room. I was afraid, Headmaster. I was so afraid to look around… So I got up and left without turning back. There was somebody trying to get up the girl's tower, but kept falling down the slide. It was Harry."
"I surmised as much," he said, encouraging her to continue.
"Well, he asked me to levitate him up and I did. Then…" Ginny cast her thoughts back but nothing came up. "I don't remember," she announced, feeling slightly panic-stricken.
Dumbledore sighed. "I thought that that might be the case. When Harry brought you to the Hospital Wing, he filled us in however."
Ginny waited.
"In short, it seems that you- or Lana- cut themselves on their arms creating deep gashes of the deadly sort. They then continued to stun Hermione Granger while she slept and let the blood pour all over her, creating the illusion that she died silently in the middle of the night in her bed."
"I believe Lana has done this to trick Lord Voldemort into thinking she has killed Ms. Granger when she has merely spilt her blood on her. It was a short distraction. She has succeeded in pushing him out of your mind and saving one of your best friends in the process."
Ginny was confused and shocked. "How did Lana push him from my mind?"
"When you were at the point of near death, Voldemort felt it and fled. If he would have stayed and you would have died… he could have lost his mind. He would have been a shell of his former self with no brain control what-so-ever."
"So it's… over?" Ginny asked, hardly daring to hope.
Dumbledore smiled sadly. "It is never over, not even now. Voldemort may be gone from your mind, but Lana isn't. She was, as Harry said, yours all along. But she is so mutated and contorted by Voldemort that she simply doesn't fit in your body anymore. We're currently trying to find a way to reverse the effects…"
Ginny swallowed. "I'll go mad, won't I?"
He looked her in the eye. "If we do not find what we need to help you, then yes, Ms. Weasley, you will."
Ginny, who wasn't expecting such a straight forward answer, started.
"Why did he choose me?" she asked him in sorrow.
"Because you, Ms. Weasley, have been hiding a part of you that was uncovered by Lord Voldemort some time ago. He already had a weak connection with you from the diary, he decided to use it." The Headmaster looked apologetic. "It is my theory that he used you as an experiment."
Ginny replied thickly. "…Experiment?"
He nodded and continued. "He wanted to see how he was able to possess someone with a weak, but definite connection. He wasn't supposed to go this far with you at all. He was supposed to leave you to die or go insane, but his plan worked too well. It was a good opportunity. But now he failed and I fear he will go back to his original plan now that he has the information he needs."
"What original plans?" Ginny asked, trying to get over the fact that she was used by one of the darkest wizards of all time.
"To use Harry Potter instead."
They stared at each other for a few moments, Ginny's heart beating wildly.
He motioned to the battle raging behind him. "It's your fault." Then he shook away his sleeve and showed her his dark mark.
"I-I don't understand," the other Ginny whispered shakily.
"You will," he whispered back.
The door to the infirmary burst open and Hermione ran in with Ron at her heals. There were tears in her eyes and Ron looked white.
"Headmaster," she screamed desperately. "Harry's gone missing!"
Dumbledore got up, his light blue robes swirling around his thin body. "What?" he asked loudly.
"Harry," Ron panted. "This morning when I woke up he wasn't in his bed. We've looked everywhere but we can't find him. Then I found this under his pillow." He brandished a note in the Headmaster's direction.
Dumbledore took it and his eyes zoomed over the lines quickly. "Oh, Harry…" he sighed, sounding old and defeated.
"What?" Ginny asked, a feeling of foreboding overwhelming her.
He looked at her. "He's left the school."
"You will," he whispered back.
A/N: Ah, I was supposed to finish writing this a few days ago, but I've been way to tired to be coherent regulary, it seems ;) I hope you like the cliffie! -cackles evilly- New update soon, but first I need to start the new chapter for S.o.a.D. Also, if you have any questions you want answered in this fic before it ends, now's the time to do it! Ask in a review, and I'll try to answer it in the next chapter, or the one after that if necessary. Now, as always, reviews feed my muse and make me update faster! . And sorry about the no Draco in this chapter, I was going to add him at the end, but that would ruin the dramatic ending I had -lol-