54) When did you last let your heart decide?

As glad as Erik was about Christine and the boy getting together, he couldn´t help being a little sad as well. Now it was certain that the girl would leave his house soon, maybe even today after the performance. She´d move in with her Vicomte, and they´d be happy. And he? He´d be alone again, free to ponder over his destroyed relationship with Meg. As if he hadn´t done so often enough in the last weeks!

The opera came to its end slowly, but steadily. Having come back from outside the Tin Soldier was searching for his beloved between the mass of other toys. Approaching the chorus girls who played the Ballerina´s friends Erik thought bitterly that he should better enjoy the physical contact he´d have with Meg while squeezing through the rows of dancers. It would probably be the closest he´d ever get to her again.

He looked at the blond girl pleadingly. The other girls didn´t seem to notice anything, but during the last months Meg had learned to tell his mood from his eyes and mouth only. His silent message was clear: ´Please, Meg! Forgive me what I´ve done! I love you.´. It became incredibly hard to remain indifferent while there was a complete chaos of emotions inside her.

Finally their bodies touched, and they both jumped slightly. "Erik…", Meg breathed barely audibly. Yet he had heard her even over the sound of the orchestra. "Meg, I-" He couldn´t go on for in this moment he received a discreet nudge in the back from a terrified-looking Marie, who tried to remind the Opera Ghost that he was supposed to keep moving.

With a soundless sigh he went to the rest of the girls, pretending to search for his Princess. What a pointless task! He had already found his princess; she was standing over there, just as he had described it in his song "Heart of Tin". Yet it still remained to be seen whether she wanted him back. Apparently being together that closely had affected her as much as him. But what if it had been in a negative way? What if she had truly meant to say: ´Erik, leave me in peace.´?

Unfortunately this annoying Marie had been right: He didn´t have time for thinking now; first he had to be burnt in the fireplace. Holding each other by the hands Christine and he sang their last duet. He knew that singing made the girl happy. After all, it had the same effect on him. But he had never seen her eyes sparkle like in these minutes. He wondered whether true happiness looked like that.

When the song was over they let themselves fall to the ground and vanished through a trapdoor while flames plunged the stage into an unreal light and the last scene was performed. Leaving the room they had ended up in to get back in time for the curtain calls Christine and Erik had a moment for talking. "She still loves you." were the girl´s first words. "How can you tell?", he asked, a little puzzled. If Meg had told her so earlier, she´d surely have said something by now.

Christine smiled. "She´s my best friend. I can see it in her eyes.", she explained. But that didn´t seem to be a satisfying answer for Erik. "Even if that´s true, what does it change? This isn´t about love, but about trust. Can Meg trust me or does she have to be afraid that I do violence to her the moment she turns around?" "These are questions I can´t answer for her.", Christine said sensibly. "If she listens to her heart, it´ll lead her straight to you." "And if she listens to her mind, it´ll make her run away as quickly as possible.", he gave back, entering the stage after the girl.

The curtain calls were a noisy and tumultuous affair. Erik only caught a brief glimpse of Meg before people coming onto the stage to congratulate the singers and dancers blocked his vision. Since crowds of people horribly reminded him of the spectators visiting his cage in the gypsy camp he tried to leave. Yet overhearing the first bits of what could develop into a very interesting conversation between the managers and an elderly lady he decided to stay.

"What lovely costumes I´ve seen tonight!", the woman just exclaimed, clapping her hands in a delighted way. "And what an excellent idea is was to have all Tin Soldiers wear masks! It was meant to symbolise their uniformity, wasn´t it?" "Well… yes! Yes, of course!", M.Firmin said, glad about the explanation. After all, he couldn´t tell her that one of the Soldiers had certain difficulties in showing his face in public. Erik chuckled softly.

While Erik continued to eavesdrop the managers making up excuse after excuse Meg had been cornered by Pierre at the other side of the stage. "How nice to see you again after all those days, my darling.", he drawled. "Unfortunately work kept me busy, so that I was unable to come to the opera for a while. And you never answered my letters." "I was busy as well.", Meg replied quickly. "The new production, you know…"

This seemed to have been the right answer for Pierre smiled. "The only important thing is that we´re together now, isn´t it? And I intend to spend much more time with you in the future." The mere thought made Meg cringe. Not having to endure this man had been the best aspect of the last two weeks. If it had been for her, he could have been busy for the rest of his life.

He leaned closer. "We´ve known each other for such a long time.", he whispered, patting her head as if she was a little dog. "I´ll talk to your mother and persuade her to let you stay with me a few nights a week. Then we´ll finally get something we both enjoy. I´ve waited far too long…" When his hand wandered down her cheek and into the unmistakable direction of her cleavage Meg frantically looked around for help. Yet she couldn´t spot anyone, not her mother, not Christine… nobody.

Summoning up all the strength she could muster she hissed: "Take your fingers off me at once!". Pierre was so astonished that he complied. Encouraged by his behaviour Meg went on: "You make me sick, Pierre Devoiraux! You think you can buy everything with your family´s money? That´s wrong. You can´t buy my love. I´ve never even liked you.".

For a moment he was speechless. Then his face spilt into an ugly grin. "There´s someone else, isn´t there?", he asked. "I was hardly allowed to touch you while another man was taking you every night. Who is it? One of the stage hands? Or maybe a musician?" "No!", the girl called. She had rarely been that angry. Would Erik ever talk to her as if she was a common harlot? Of course the answer was ´no´. He only had done one thing wrong, and it was about time that she forgave him.

"You want to know the identity of the man I love?", she cried shrilly. "He is it!" Her arm shook violently as she pointed directly at Erik. Suddenly everyone else as very quiet.