Thanks to justawriter, Me, midheaven, Kennedy Leigh Morgan, LanaJoy, Meesh26, Kate, and Severis.
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Chapter 9 – Feminine
Scully sat quietly on the balustrade, the crisp wind rushing against her face, which was no longer protected by her now-long hair. This was now pulled back tightly and covered with a cap. The makeup was gone, along with the jewelry and the luxurious dress, replaced with sackcloth and the tight bindings that cut into her skin.
She sighed heavily. Somehow, I saw last night ending slightly differently.
As she and Mulder had been walking back to her room, she had allowed wild fantasies to take hold. She has imagined getting to their room, locking the door, turning to face him, and feeling him take her in his arms and…
But that was not to be. Instead, she has spent the night caring for Lady Rochester. The lady had not, in fact, been bewitched. She had just come down with a particularly bad case of dysentery. But Scully, being a doctor, hadn't been able to bring herself to leave the kindly older woman to suffer. So, she had done the best she could to make Lady Rochester company, and insisted that Mulder go back to the dormitory and get some rest.
Which was how she had arrived at this point, alone, as dusk once again claimed the land. She watched the people she had grown familiar with walk slowly past her, on their way to a late supper. Lord Weatherby. Sir Caret, Duke Rockland… all the men with whom she had danced the previous night. All the men who had showed her such admiration, who had treated her as someone special and beautiful. They now passed her buy with barely a curt nod.
Scully bit her lip and shut her eyes to the tears that suddenly threatened to spill over. As foolish as she felt for the sentiment, she missed that attention. She was no supermodel, she knew, but back home, she had grown accustomed to being noticed by men. It was perhaps a flaw in human society, but it was the truth - far more attention is paid a beautiful woman then a short, effeminate man. Mulder noticed her, of course, but she couldn't shake the recollection that he only acted when she had worn that dress.
Am I that repulsive to all of them like this? Not that it matters. I repulse myself. Being what I'm not, living a lie day in and day out. I need to get home.
"Sir Scully, are you quite alright?" Lady Rochester's maid ambled out onto the terrace, but Sir Scully was already gone.
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Mulder found her sitting down on her bed in their room when he got in from dinner in the mess hall.
He sat down next to her on the bed, taking in her sad face with concern. "What's wrong, Scully?"
She sighed and decided to not pretend everything was fine for once. "I just feel so… unlike myself. Like a fraud, which I am, but worse… like I'm lying to myself along with the world."
"About what?"
She looked at him in disbelief. "Are you kidding?"
He flushed and looked down. "I get that part. I mean, about the lying to yourself. You know you're a woman, so…"
She shook her head in annoyance. "Men. You just don't get it. I guess I expected differently from you, but… Sometimes it seems like none of you see anything beneath the surface. 'I know I'm a woman, so I'm perfectly fine.' Right. You think it's that simple…"
"Maybe that's not always a bad thing. Maybe sometimes you look too deep into something. Maybe it is that simple."
"I just feel so unlike myself. I feel ugly and unfeminine…"
He smiled and took her face in his hands. "You could never be ugly. And, trust me, you are very feminine…"
"But…"
He leaned down to kiss her gently, silencing her protest. She froze for a moment before responding and letting herself become lost in the feel and the taste of him.
His hands slid along her body, pulling at her loose shirt. She broke the kiss and stood up hurriedly.
He looked abashed. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to go too quickly…"
She smiled softly, and blushed a little. "No, it's not that at all. Just, we should probably lock the door…"
"Good idea," he said breathily, returning her smile.
Once the door was locked and bolted, she uneasily made her way back to the bed where her lover was waiting. He held her as she insinuated herself between his legs, leaning in for another long kiss. She began to unlace the strings on his shirt, gently stroking his chest, stopping only to lean back and remove her own shirt.
She raised her arms and allowed him to slowly unwrap the bindings from her chest. When this was done, he gave her a long look, then pulled her close to him again.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked.
She looked him straight in the eye. "Yes. I think this is finally our time…"
She pushed him back onto the bed and for a moment they just lay there, enjoying the warmth of each other's skin.
Mulder gazed up into Scully's eyes, and knew that everything they had been through in the past month was worth it, if just for that one wonderful instant.
He lifted his head to kiss her again and she glided her hands through his hair, then lower. As they finished undressing each other, he gently rolled her over onto her back and began kissing a path down her neckline. Scully leaned into the pillows, her breath becoming shallow, and she ran her fingers along his muscular arms. Mulder felt his pulse quicken and he knew that this was exactly where he wanted to be. Scully couldn't agree more.
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Outside, the moon shone and the stars twinkled brightly. The little pool in the clearing bubbled and shimmered, as if aware that this night was one of transformations.
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Next Chapter: Kerrilyn is determined to get to the bottom of Sir Mulder and Sir Scully's newfound closeness.
This was on the short side, I know, but important nonetheless. The next chap will be lengthier.
I'd been planning this chapter for awhile. Please review and let me know how you think it turned out!