Title: Just a Friend (part 2 of 5)
Author: the Black Rose
Pairing: Athrun x Lacus
Fandom: Gundam Seed
Theme: #17, kHz
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed. This fanfiction has no commercial value and I am not making any kind of profit or income off of this story, or the use of characters owned by Sunrise and Bandai.
AN: This story is in an "alternate universe", aka, it does not take place in the regular, Seed timeline. Rather, it takes place in our own, regular world, and explores the possibility of Athrun and Lacus as two people in today's day and age going to the same college, meeting, and becoming friends (Athrun is a year ahead of Lacus in terms of grade level - he was a sophomore when she was a freshman).
Thank you so much to those that will read it. Much love, Rose
Just a Friend - Part 2
"Will you really tutor me?" She asked with a weird sort of smile. One that I thought meant she was really laughing at me on the inside.
"I, uh…I can't—"
She looked down, and I saw lines appear in her forehead. I was afraid that if she glanced back up, I'd cave.
She didn't look up.
I think that was worse.
"I mean. Yeah, sure."
-
That's how we met. And that's how a quiet engineering major who'd never had a girlfriend made best friends with one of the most beautiful girls in school.
I taught her math, physics, astronomy…you name it. Well, except for English. She was a psychology major, on track to go to medical school. Lacus really was intelligent, she just lacked focus when it came to studying.
In return, she taught me how to match my shirt with my socks, how to buy stain-resistant slacks that looked pressed right out of the dryer, and she taught me that short jackets, not lab coats, worked better with jeans. By my junior year, I had a fairly large circle of friends – mostly thanks to Lacus's efforts. I had several girl…friends. As in, I was always "Just a friend".
But. I wanted something more with Lacus. I wanted her to wake up one day and realize that she loved me – as something more than a friend.
She'd told me she loved me on many occasions. I remember the first time…
-
We sat on the floor of my off-campus apartment (one of the perks of having a decent-paying fulltime job and being an only child of fairly wealthy parents), our books spread all over the cheap veneer coffee table; mugs of instant hot chocolate sat in the center of the mess, piping steam into the room. Lacus sat close to me, peering over my shoulder as I worked out one of the equations. Her breath on my neck brought non-mathematical images to my mind.
Did I mention we were alone in my apartment?
When I finished showing her…ahem…how to work out the problem, she grinned up at me and leaned her cheek on my arm. Her smiles were infectious, and I probably grinned back as I reached for my hot chocolate.
"I love you."
I almost dropped the mug of cocoa on my lap. "Lacus?"
"You really are the best friend I've ever had, Athrun. I'm so glad we met."
Friend…
"You're…so patient with me. And kind. The first time…Well, you were so strange that first time you spoke to me." She giggled, and brought one hand up to her mouth like she was trying to hold in her laughter.
"And that professor. Oh my, Athrun, that was funny."
-
To think of that incident now made me cringe something awful, but I laughed with her anyway. She told me she loved me. And I knew she meant it. But, I was Athrun, that quiet guy that was 'sweet' but 'just a friend'.
The first time she said it, I was elated. Then, it made me happy to hear her tell me she loved me, but it also made me ache for a time when she would say it and mean it as more than 'just a friend'. But, after another year went by…
I began to hate those words.
The way I hated every time she introduced me to another girl.
The way I hated every boyfriend she'd ever had.
I hated being trapped. Trapped by my own feelings. Trapped because I couldn't find a way to express them to her.
I wanted to be her friend, if that was all I was allowed to be.
But, I couldn't help it.
I always wanted something more.
Lacus has this 'way' about her. I think the only person in the world that has it is her. And there's just no way to describe it unless you've met her. It's who she is…
It's the way she enters the room. Light clings to her, swept in, maybe, with a sweep of her long, pinkish hair.
She has a way of moving… That, I admit, it makes me think of sex (ok, I'd probably be thinking of sex anyway). It's not like she wears provocative clothing – nothing too tight or too low cut.
And yet…
She's sexy (there, I said it).
It's the natural flow of her body, her eyes when she looks at you…er me.
Her vulnerability…makes me want to hold her, naked, in my arms.
Her anger makes me want to try kissing her senseless and then taking her to my bed.
Her tears… Ok, this is that poetic thing, isn't it? Fuck. Dearka was right (I hate it when he's right). The only look she has that doesn't make me think of sex is the one she gave me today.
The same one she's been giving me for the last month: that look like she was hurt or wounded. It makes me want to take the bastard outside and rip him limb from limb. There's only one problem.
The bastard is me.