A/N: Sorry for the short chapter! The next one will be longer I promise!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything HP related.
Emma: No Snape huh? I might use him eventually but ah, you know. Depends on my cards. Yeah, my penname comes from the Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky. It's like my absolute favorite thing ever. It's a book written through anonymous letters from a boy named 'Charlie.' If you haven't read it I highly suggest it. My profile quotes always come from there. I've really picked up a lot of my writing style from Chbosky. Anyways, I'm glad someone appreciates the fact I'm making all my fics romance free. And the whole left side is something I'm really into. I've always had that mind set because of the artistic history behind left sides. Thanks so much for the review!
LadyButtercup: Yo Megan! You're a sucky reviewer. I haven't cut up your pictures yet. I can't believe you aren't coming to my birthday gathering. God, what kind of friend are you? Thanks for reviewing!
Stinky Stan: Thanks so much! In this chapter Sirius will definitely show more flipflopsity. I made that word up. Totally. Anyways, I'm glad you like it. Thanks for reviewing!
Steelsings (x3): Wow. You're amazing at reviewing. You're like my hero. Anyways, my head is like huge now. The parts you specifically indicated in your reviews are the parts that I'm really ify on you know. The whole werewolf part I thought was pretty stupid and the beginning of the first chapter seemed really corny to me. You know I'm making this up as I go, and Sirius especially I haven't really thought much about. You guys have him pinned down and I'm like 'Yeah well I guess he is.' Like you guys know him better than I do. I'm not amazing at this and eventually I'll be in a rut when I get further along, but thanks so much anyways for reviewing!
Mooncheese: I loved the little P.S. included there haha. Harry's dead now huh? Like I've mentioned before I'm just writing, not thinking too much about what I am doing so I hadn't exactly thought of him as dead. I'm glad you're enjoying it! Thanks so much for reviewing!
Ladyfyre: I figured people would be open more to this rather than a slash. Sirry is kind of hard to wrap your mind around at first anyways. Even I, as a somewhat established fan of Sirry, prefer a bonding fic. I guess this fic is about fighting demons. Honestly I'm just writing. I have no idea how the fighting will take place so hold on, it's going to be a bumpy ride. Thanks for reviewing!
Asleep
Chapter 4
Sirius Black walked in his animagus form next to his childhood enemy, Severus Snape, whom he hated, and his childhood friend and comrade, Remus Lupin, whom he also hated. At the moment. He couldn't quite trace the source of all his hatred or resentment at the time, but he was too panic stricken at the fact they were approaching number four Privet Drive. Number four Privet Drive as in the Dursley's number four Privet Drive. The Dursley's number four Privet Drive as in Harry's number four Privet Drive.
Sirius had spent the last hour ignoring Remus as if the plague. Since his friend had stumbled into his work room, he had been bombarded with useless questions and different looks of horror and panic...and sympathy. And if there was one thing he hated, it was sympathy. He had spent twelve years being wrongly accused of his best friend's murder. His best friend's murder.
Ironically enough, Sirius would have killed one of his best friends that same night. In all context though, a person should really only have one best friend, kind of like a person should only have one true love, and without a doubt his best friend had been James.
In Azkaban, Sirius was not only pegged with the guilt of indirectly killing his best friend, but for wishing it had been someone else. The person that came to mind most often had been Remus. He knew it was terrible, but Peter was already the traitor and James was like his brother. This line of thought usually only came when he was at his lowest but nevertheless the anger washed up on him so quickly at both himself and Remus that he had broken his fingers and wrist many times from the punches the inflicted on the cold stone walls.
James had hated sympathy too. No marauder needed sympathy. Except for Pettigrew. He needed all the help he could get now that he was loose.
No marauder's son needed sympathy. Harry was a tough kid. Not just tough, strong too. Sirius knew he hated being in the spotlight. He didn't need the sympathy. Or the help, for that matter. He was a tough kid. (A/N: This is Sirius' own denial of not being able to help. I know in the last chapter he was going crazy at not being able to help Harry so I thought I'd clear that up now. Sirius is going to be really flip floppy on emotions and worries because after twelve years in Azkaban I don't think he'd be able to interact too great with others)
It was then that the big black dog realized where he was standing. On the doorstep of number four Privet Drive. Maybe a year ago when he had first escaped Sirius would have found this immensely joyous, standing next to his best friend ready to see his godson. Now, however, Sirius found it amusing. He was standing next to Severus Snape dressed as a muggle for one thing. The more he tried to pull out what he was feeling the more he realized just how much Azkaban had done to him.
He wasn't dead or even emotionally dead or whatever tragic label you wanted to put to him. That night in the Shrieking Shack had proved just how much emotion he had left. Then again thinking about it now the only true emotion he'd shown to anyone was anger. And realizing he'd shown his only true emotion since Azkaban to someone who didn't deserve it made him almost want to see Harry, just to somehow show him how much he loved him...Almost.
And now standing there as Severus irritably pounded on the door and even as that giant bear of a man Lily's only sister had married answered the door Sirius was lost and devoid of any emotion proving to him again how much he had changed.
The grim like dog could see Snape's hand tensed in his pocket ready to swipe out his wand already if the muggle refused to let them in. Truthfully Sirius almost expected it from him as he remembered the inside jokes between Harry and Ron about them, however, the man who Sirius vaguely drew a name to...Vernon. Vernon and Petunia Dursley. So the names that were sent out on a wedding invitation to Lily. Either ways the muggle let in almost immediately as if he was expecting them.
Harry better be alright, Sirius thought as his worries and concerns came back ten fold. He could feel his fur bristle as he quickly stalked in before Vernon could shut him out. The man gave him a few reproachful looks but didn't voice any complaints. Out of the corner of his eye, Sirius could visibly see Remus stiffen. It only took him a few more seconds to realized why.
The whole house reeked of an extremely bloody smell mixed in with perspiration. The hackles on the bear like dog suddenly rose as it bared its teeth growling. It would have bombarded the whale of a man right then if not for a hand securing itself deep in its fur.
"Where's the Potter boy now?" Snape asked calmly, only slightly amused by the other two visitors' sudden aggressive behavior. Damn canine senses.
"He's up in his room, he-" Dursley started, cut off by the dog sprinting up the stairs followed closely by a ragged looking man. Shuffling his feet uselessly, Vernon made to call out after them, but was cut off by the greasy Potions master.
"Yes, well when find Mr. Potter, he better be in one piece," he warmed, eyes swimming in a cold streak. "Quite a crowd would be made unfit if they were to find out the boy was not well, just because of his muggle relatives."
"B-but I already ex-explained in the letter," Dursley gulped nervously, "the boy is consistent on mindlessly sitting around. We can't even get him to eat or take a bloody shower-"
"Letter? What letter?" Snape spat venomously.
"To that Bumbledee. That's where my wife said to send it. Sent if off with that ruddy owl of his yesterday."
"And I assume the reason for this letter to Dumbledore was Mr. Potter's health, or lack of?"
Turning from sour to interested quite promptly, Snape's mind sprang into action. So, the little Golden Boy isn't doing too well. After all, that Hufflepuff's death surely weighs heavily on his head now. I wonder if he's snapped. I do hope so, if just for the fact I wouldn't have to see him waste my potions supplies weekly.
"See the boy for yourself; he looks like he's nearly finished off already. He doesn't eat and hardly sleeps. He just slips into these unconscious states, but he's still somehow awake."
"I think it's time I see this for myself," Snape replied, his sneer just barely covering a frown. Using swift, graceful steps he made his way up the stairs and around the dark upper part of the house.
Honestly, it wasn't hard to tell Potter's room from the rest. There was only one door open and there was a large quantity of forlorn characteristics creeping out of it. Walking towards it, the closer Severus got to the room the darker his surroundings became. Even without heightened senses he could literally smell Potter's despair from where he was and as he turned hastily into the room he stopped in his tracks.
Snape regretted saying anything of the sort about Potter snapping, as the reality hit too close to home now looking at him, and at the same time his childhood nemesis was thinking the same thing when he had said no marauder's son needed sympathy.
A/N: Sorry it's such a short chapter, but Wednesday is my birthday, so uh, forgive me? For my birthday present everyone should review! Thanks for reading! Next chapter will (finally) have some Sirius/Harry interaction!