Disclaimer

I do not own Naruto.

Summary

It all began with a harmless joke on an unsuspecting chunin. Nothing bad was supposed to happen, really, and Kakashi was supposed to go scot-free. Instead, he got saddled with the finished problem: One super-cute Iruka chibi.

Author's Notes

I'm surprised that I actually got reviews for this. Thanks for all the help and such on my spelling and junk, I usually read it over so you might see an edited version in a few days. feels proud of self Wait, that means I have to continue. … Procrastination can no longer help me if people are reading this. Curses, foiled again!

I might not be able to post this as quickly considering that this is my "bad" month. Meaning that plays, exams, sports and schoolwork are going to get in the way of my computer time and me. You might find chapter three on the way quickly but four and the rest are going to be in the workings for a while.

Thank you and enjoy the cuteness.

Plastic Ponies

Kakashi grumbled as he continued to sit in the hard, wooden chair. The minutes ticked by slower and slower after the hokage left with Iruka. He sighed and pulled a kunai from its holster, beginning a simple game of throwing the weapon upwards and catching as it fell. He often used this when he had to think or was tired of something very current.

The sun was setting even tough the day seemed half done. 'Boring.' The ninja thought as he glanced out the wide windows, "I could be torturing my students right about now instead of just being…" He searched vainly for a word to convey his feelings, "Bored!" He moaned, dragging both hands down his face.

"Very witty." The elder said as he walked into the room, "I can tell you would have good comebacks." He chuckled, closing the door and walking over to his desk. The older man sat down in his chair and shuffled his papers into a pile again so the ones that had moved were back in the stack.

They both turned to look out the window to watch the last rays fade from the sky. "So… Where's the brat?"

The hokage looked up from signing a sheet; pipe already clamped in his mouth. "Oh, playing hide and seek." The look of disbelief on Kakashi's face made the other finish, "Nothing bad. Iruka played it when he was younger, went by a different name though."

Sighing, Kakashi watched the stars come out, wishing he was somewhere else. Acting on this impulse he began to stand, tuning out the chatting of the other man. He stopped when the door he was reaching for opened of its own accord.

Iruka looked up at the taller ninja with one eye, his other covered and being rubbed by his fist. The child yawned, almost falling over from the action. "Found you." He whispered, grinning slightly as he stumbled forward to tag his opponent and finish playing.

One half of Kakashi's brain screamed, 'don't do it!' while the other half was numb from the pure cuteness. Since being numb is always a plus from pain, he bent down to pick up the child. The small body was warm and moved so he was closer to the ninja.

"I see you two are getting along. Of course, children get along with everyone pretty well around that age." The hokage mused, "I should just be thankful you both aren't killing each other."

"Why's that?" The younger man asked, narrowing his eye in question and suspicion of the older man.

The elder's face broke into a smile, "Because you're going to be looking after him for the rest of the week! That jutsu should wear of by then." Snickering to himself, he went back to work and left Kakashi to think over what just happened. "It'll be easy, I swear!" He said, waving at the shocked, angry expression on his ninja's face.

"I've filled him in on the details he needs the most. Who you are." He began to tick the information off his fingers, "Where he is going to be staying and what you are. The last part was the hardest. He just didn't seem to understand what a jounin was, only that it's a type of ninja."

The hokage shrugged and changed his pen for a match to light his pipe, "His memories should be coming back in the next few days. Body will most likely change back on the last day." He grinned while throwing his match into a wastebasket, "That means you're going to be having a mini-Iruka running around your house with all the training of a chunin. Lucky you."

The little boy inhaled deeply and sighed into his caretaker's neck, trying to fight off the lull of sleep. Unintentionally, the scarecrow shifted his weight so that Iruka was more comfortable against his vest-covered chest. "How am I supposed to live through this?" He moaned out loud.

"Simple. Just make sure you keep your eyes on him at all times." The hokage said without looking up, now intent on his ignored work, "Can you leave now Kakashi? I have a lot of work to complete by tomorrow. Or do I have to escort you out?" He finished with a chuckle.

Grumbling, the copy ninja turned to the still slightly ajar door. A sound made him look and almost get smacked in the face by a small key. Figuring that it was the other teacher's house key, he pocketed it quickly to avoid dropping the sleeping child.

Half way out the door, a sudden thought hit Kakashi. "Um, hokage-sama?" A grunt made the ninja know he was being heard, "You said that Iruka played the game by different name when he was younger."

"Yes, yes…" The older man said, remembering long ago, again disregarding his paperwork, "His father hated it whenever he played it but his mother always laughed at the end. The results always were amusing." He tapped his chin and smiled wistfully at the memories of the good old days.

Kakashi rolled his one eye, wondering why the elder cared so much about this subject, "What did he call it?" He asked, frustration leaking through his voice. 'Maybe I can use this to lose the kid when he gets to be to much of a nerve-racker.' He thought, listening intently for the other man to answer.

The hokage stopped his work and looked up, pen still poised to sign a report. "I believe he called it, 'search and destroy.'" He said simply and then went back to writing, trusting his elite ninja to find his own way home.

Kakashi growled as he walked down the road with his new charge in hand. He looked quickly around to make sure no one was out on the road this early in the night. 'Damn kids…' he thought, ignoring the one in his arms, 'damn them and their stupid cuteness.' He shuddered when that word somehow formed in his mind.

A single street lamp illuminated the direction he traveled on. Few people were walking around, this being the time that most families ate dinner. A couple passed the ninja, the woman 'awing' at the child in Kakashi's arms and the lover struggling to pull her into the restaurant.

Hearing the fighting of the two, and fully refreshed from his short ten-minute nap, Iruka awoke to find himself staring into green eyes, "You are such a cute little boy!" The woman said; pinching a cheek to make sure the child was real. "Is he your daddy?" She asked, standing up so she could glance Kakashi over, flicking away her date with a free hand.

Iruka cocked his head to the side at the question before breaking into small peals of laughter. "Him?" He pointed to Kakashi and received an eager nod from the female, "No!" The child laughed out breathily and rubbed his head against the jounin's vest. "He's just here to make sure I am good." He finished while looking out of eyes narrowed from his current smile.

The woman almost melted at the simple words, only saved by her boyfriend who grabbed her as she fell. Kakashi watched them in amazement, wondering why he was never informed that children could talk at three and hold such sway over adults. He thought that both changes came at the age of nine, at least, for both.

Snapping out of his thoughts, he found Iruka tugging on his vest. The man from the couple was staring at said brown haired boy, the woman staring intently at Kakashi. Cursing himself, the copy ninja noticed that something important had to have happened in the split second he was off guard. The two other people were nearer with a hungry look in both their eyes and Iruka was squirming in an effort to put more space between them.

"You were saying?" He asked, both eyes open to gather his wits as quickly as possible. The body in his arms pushed itself even closer. The ninja wondered why as he watched the figure seem to shrink and struggle to become smaller against his vest, or even try and become one with the article of clothing.

The former teacher whimpered when the people followed his movements. "They're monsters." He whispered; the words muffled from the fabric near his face. Neither seemed to hear him, still moving closer. "Go away!" He shrieked suddenly, jolting the couple from their stupor.

They both blinked, this being the first time they were told off by a child, before the boyfriend pulled out his watch. His eyes bugging, he turned to his date, "Shoot. Honey, we're late for our reservations now." The man said frantically, hooking arms with his companion to attempt to drag her into dinner and the dimly lit restaurant.

The lady sighed, "Fine." She turned to Iruka, patting him on the head as if he was a cute puppy, "I hope that we see you again!" She frowned when the child whined and moved away from her hand.

Kakashi watched them go through the doors to the Italian bistro with mild interest. He looked down to see Iruka staring at the spot where the woman was standing a moment ago. The scarecrow bounced the child to get a reaction, "What's up?" He asked, regretting it the moment he finished.

Large, glassy eyes shone in the light, the fear still gleaming clear in them. "I don't want to be taken away." He murmured, shivering slightly at the memory and tightening his hold on the older man.

Noticing this change, Kakashi started again his walk home. "What made you think she was going to take you away Iruka?" His feet carried them closer and closer to his house.

Instead of answering, like most obedient children would do, the child just looked into the night. Silence surrounded both like a cloak as neither continued the conversation. Another couple passed but didn't note the kawaii Iruka, to engrossed with each other to bother with the two, who were becoming cloaked by the darkness by proper ninja.

Arriving on his doorstep, Kakashi sighed. Opening the door and placing Iruka on the ground, he slipped his shoes off at the straw mat and stretched, successfully popping a few bones back into place. Then when he looked up, the child was gone.

"Shit." He muttered under his breath as he shrugged his vest onto a peg near the door. "Iruka, where are you?" He said, his voice carrying easily through the house. The sound of something being chewed made the ninja smile. "I know he isn't in the kitchen eating my food." He announced, making his way to the kitchen stealthily.

The chewing stopped.

Knowing this was his chance; the scarecrow ran into the room with his known deadly speed. Confusion marred his excited features under his mask when the only thing he found in the area was a box of open cereal and a bowl, in spite of everything, still spinning on the table. Placing his hand on the porcelain to halt the noisy motion, he searched intently for clues.

"This is too easy." He said as he looked at the small shapes scattered on the ground, forming a trail. Stepping on a few by accident, the pieces of puffed rice with marshmallows let off the dry crack they were known for. "Maybe Iruka's in the living room?" He questioned himself, loud enough for the other to hear as he followed the breakfast food.

The sound of laughter made Kakashi grin under his mask, stepping through the doorway to the room. It seemed normal enough, a couch positioned in front of a television that was on. Frowning, the man flicked the screen off as the cereal bits went past it. 'Where can that little imp be?' Kakashi thought, frustrated that he hadn't found the thing of his current frustrations yet.

There weren't many places for a three year old to hide in this room, he noted. The table in the center of the room was out, it being glass and easily seen through; after all the 'Come Come Paradise' books were moved to the floor, of course. The only other objects in the room that could be used to hide a small child were the two tall bookcases and a large potted plant in the corner.

Kakashi smirked as he walked over to the said plant, "Hello, my large potted plant. Your foliage looks exceptionally healthy today." He tilted his head to the side as if listening to the woes of the flora, searching the leaves and spying a large blotch of darkness under the leaves.

"I have you now!" Kakashi yelled as he struck forward to grab the shadowed figure. His eyebrow was threatening to disappear into his gray hairline from the shock of what he found. "What the…" The thing gripped in his hands was definitely not a small child filled with energy. Instead, a large rubber fire hydrant, the type a dog would chew on happily, had been captured by the elite jounin.

Muttering, the scarecrow threw his jutsu dog's toy over his shoulder carelessly, the faint squeak bringing him no pleasure. "Just keep your eyes on him at all times." He quoted the hokage, thoroughly pissed off. He sauntered over to his leather coach and collapsed onto it, "It'll be easy!" He proclaimed sarcastically, lifting his arms to the ceiling to ask for divine intervention.

Kakashi rubbed the bridge of his nose in an effort to fight off the oncoming migraine, it didn't work but it was worth a try. The man sighed as his muscles relaxed, going into a sleeplike trance on the futon. His eye fluttered shut, tightly closed and never detecting the motion coming from the top of his bookshelf since he was already tired from the day's events that had passed so quickly by.

The child, who he was searching for, currently perched up and to the side, watched as his caretaker fell asleep. Crawling from the bookcase's top shelf and down to the back of the couch in a fluent movement, the boy made sure that he was balanced on the piece of wood before looking down. Iruka stared at the man in confusion, wondering why the game was all of a sudden over, continuing to chew on his cereal pieces pensively.

Something falling on Kakashi's face and into his hair made him awake to see chocolate eyes regarding him from above. The words 'search and destroy' echoed through the ninja's mind and he was immediately on guard, jumping into a crouched position on the glass table and almost slipping from his magazines littered over the surface.

Iruka watched with mild enjoyment, pointing at Kakashi with the one hand that wasn't in his mouth. "You were asleep! Go back!" He frowned when the taller man almost fell from the surface in surprise. The past teacher huffed, his eyes rolling to the ceiling as if asking the gods why he deserved this, mirroring the action of the ninja a few moments before. "Can we go to sleep now?" He asked, only now struggling to keep his eyes open, rubbing them with both eyes as if to punctuate his point.

Kakashi nodded and picked up Iruka, being careful to pick up the entire chunin outfit that the child was still wearing even though it huge off his petite body. "You'll be staying in my room. I'll see if I can't find you something to wear that might fit you." He dropped the child onto the plush bed and turned to the closet to look for a pair of pajamas or an extremely small shirt.

'This wouldn't be so hard if the kid wasn't so small. I'd probably have better luck buying clothes from a toy shop than an actual children's store.' He thought looking back at Iruka, who was currently throwing a pillow at the wall. 'Really destructive though. Maybe I should make a note of that…' Shaking his head, he shrugged, 'Nah, he's just working out his teenage hormones.' The ninja paused in his searching, bewilderment seeping into his thoughts, 'But he's not a teenager, only a little kid. Oh great, that means a lot of energy for me to have fun with.' He sighed and dug back into the pile of clothing in the closet.

Iruka yawned as he looked around, bored stiff and legs swinging while his hand covered his mouth in a more polite manner as he yawned again. Seeing that Kakashi was slowing down in his search, the child took off his chunin vest, shrugging most of it off by simply standing, and laboring intensely with the zipper when the neck opening was to small for his waist. Deciding to work on his headband next, he tugged frantically and pouted when it didn't move from its position.

The copy ninja turned around at this moment, smiling but catching himself at the last second at the child's predicament. "Can you help me?" The young boy asked, turning around so the older man saw the knot and batting large eyes at him. "Please, Kakashi?" The simple question with the name that had no title made Kakashi briefly halt in his approach before continuing.

His pale fingers undid the tied ends fluently, also pulling out the thin hair tie as an afterthought. Iruka giggled when a hand raked through his auburn strands, actually purring when the other ninja scratched behind his neck. Kakashi stopped; the thought of what he was doing making him rethink his actions.

'When Iruka changes back he's going to remember this.' He thought, grimacing at what the other teacher would do to him when he got bigger and could hold heavy, blunt objects. Shuddering, he pulled away and headed to the door.

"Kakashi-san!" Iruka cried, hands reaching out the older man. "I still need help!" He whined, trying to stomp his foot on the bed but only getting his foot stuck in the pillow he had thrown. The child sighed and held out his borrowed shirt, one of the jounin's few t-shirts, silently asking for it to be put on.

Backtracking, the tall man lifted the top and slid the boy into it quickly, his brain screaming for sleep. "Do you need any more help?" He expected a yes from the usually agreeable chunin, at least when he was an adult anyway.

Iruka shook his head rapidly, almost falling over because of the dizzying action. "I don't need your assistance." He said proudly, pushing the grown-up away with his hand while the other pushed a strand of hair behind an ear hastily. "I can do it myself."

Kakashi wondered if this meant that Iruka was changing back, he'd never heard any adolescent say something like that at the age of three. Of course, this esteemed ninja was never at the kiddy zone in most amusement parks so he had nothing to work on. "Well, just in case you need my 'assistance' on anything else I'll be down in the living room." He explained, receiving a distracted nod from the child as he pulled back the covers on the bed.

Speaking a muted 'good night' with a grin at the toddler's actions, Kakashi walked back to the living room, leaving Iruka to change into the rest of the clothing he left behind. Lying down on the couch in a more dignified way then before, he stared out the window near his head. Not even bothering to remove the wraps from his legs or his headband, which would only bring back the incident, the jounin soon fell into a fitful sleep. His last thoughts troublesome and all involving the little boy only a few strides away.

'I'm not going to make it through the week…' was his last thought accompanied by a sigh, his third tonight, as he closed his eyes under a tri-quarter moon.

To be continued…

Previews

Shadow attacks; strawberries are problematic and shopping!