A/N: WARNING: This chapter does contain a serious and intense situation. If violence upsets you do not read this!
Okay moving on, thanks once more for all the great reviews and to everyone that reads this. I have so much fun writing this and am glad that my brief moment of writers block has once again passed.
decadentserenity: I'm glad to have been of assistance! he he... more toe tingling scenes to come I promise.
Velvet Storm: May I suggest crawling into the freezer to cool off my dear? heh
Fairy of Fire and Fury: I'm glad I could put a smile on your face dear, and of course you now loathe Malfoy even more, that's the entire point! However, I do love his character almost as much as Severus, I'm sure he will be making another appearance in the not too distant future. I'm also thinking of writing a Hermione/Lucius fic too, let me know what you think.
Severus-Fan: Oh I am sure Hermione will be realizing her attraction quite soon, wink wink, and as for a punishment for interrupting Dark Lord business, well lets just say she's going to get a "time-out"
MysticSong1978: ahh yes, you do indeed have a point there. Can't have limp Hermione's wandering around can we? he he... and when it comes to Severus only hearing bad things about himself, well we all hear what we want to. Considering that he is full of so much self-hatred and pain it is not too surpising that he would twist the words of those around him to reflect his own feelings of worthlessness.
Slytherinsess: I am sad to say that this is indeed quite a serious chapter, not what you want to see I know. While I am trying to keep a certain degree of humor and light-heartedness to this story, the fact that Severus is indeed still considered a Death Eater by many and at one point did support the Master he continues to serve there is of course going to be a certain level of seriousness and unpleasantness involved. I cannot deny his past, to do so would be to betray the character I adore so much. I will try to include as much humor as possible, but I have a feeling that the next couple of chapters are going to be a little more serious and darker than the first several were. Please do continue to read though, I value your comments and suggestions.
Okay, enough rambling on my part. Again, this chapter is quite serious, and Severus does need to learn to control his temper, tsk tsk. Enjoy!
Perching on the edge of the bed Hermione stared listlessly at the closed door for several long silent minutes consumed with a choking shame at what she had just done. Squeezing her eyes shut tightly she finally let the tears that had been hanging heavily in her eyes seep out beneath her thick lashes. A hiccupping sob flowed over her lips as she began to tremble violently, quickly covering her mouth with a bandaged hand she tried desperately to muffle her wracking sobs, listening to the soft drone of voices beyond the door.
Wallowing in self pity she lost all sense of time, sobbing until her throat was raw and her cheeks dripped with tears, her chest heaving painfully as she collapsed back onto the bed curling up into a shuddering ball. The sound of the door slowly creaking open roused Hermione from her exhausted stupor, her eyes puffy and bloodshot as she slowly raised her head from the cradle of her arm, peering hesitantly over her shoulder at the dark figure standing in the doorway. The light from the now subdued fire shone at his back, ringing his head in a soft glow as it reflected upon his raven hair, his eyes glittering in the flickering candlelight. In a hoarse and strained voice she tentatively whispered,
"Is… is he… gone?" A sharp nod was the only reply she received as she watched Severus take several steps into the room leaving the door gaping open behind him. His steps were slow and measured, utterly feline and terrifying as she curled tighter into herself, her breaths growing fast and panicked. Severus stopped barely feet from the edge of the bed his gaze intense and full of a fiery fury and something that to Hermione was all too reminiscent of the way Lucius had looked at her.
Severus let his ink black eyes sweep over her in a blatantly obvious display of yearning, his lips twitching into a malicious smile as he observed the fear swell up in her eyes. The sickly sweet scent of her fear permeated the cool air, swirling around him like so many softly stroking and tempting fingers drawing him closer to her. He watched with dark delight as she pressed herself deeper into the mattress, shrinking away from him in fear and repulsion, her eyes growing large with fright. A low growl rumbled in his throat as his legs brushed against the edge of the bed, she was so close now, barely beyond his reach, all that smooth and silky skin calling out like a beacon from amongst the black towel still wrapped tightly around her and the black sheets of the bed.
So tempting his mind mused in a sinister voice, so delectable, so responsive to your touch… it was just an act, it was all an act he countered bitterly, shocked by the hurt that had settled into the pit of his stomach. Are you so sure? the dark voice within him purred, sounding too much like Lucius for his comfort. Yes… no, I can be sure of nothing these days he sighed internally, questioning his own feelings and thoughts as he resisted the need to reach out and simply run his aching fingers over her warm flesh. Touch her, seduce her, possess her… the voice continued to purr as though Lucius stood at his back whispering in his ear to egg him on. She will only scream a little, you remember that don't you? The sweet sound of their screams when you take them by force. No need to worry if she wants it, no need for her to enjoy it as long as she is yours, all yours. Severus winced at his own despicable thoughts, a wave of sickness rising in his throat, contorting his face into an expression of pain and displeasure. I will not do it! he growled mentally, swallowing hard to force the bile back down into his violently twisting and clenching stomach, a light sheen of sweat spreading across his forehead.
Hermione surveyed the emotions flickering across his sweat-dampened face, his eyes darting about frantically unseeing and unfocused as his lips twitched. Cautiously rising onto her elbows as she swept her hair back out of her face and asked in a meek and quavering voice,
"Professor… Professor are you okay?"
Her breath stuck in her throat as his fierce narrowed eyes locked onto her sharply, his lips curling back into a vicious sneer.
"You foolish, foolish girl" he hissed vehemently, his voice barely above a heated whisper. "Has the company of your pathetic counterparts addled your brain so much?" He asked, his eyes containing a ferocious anger.
"How dare you say…" she began in response, her expression quickly fading from concern to rage as her own eyes flashed darkly with baited anger.
"How dare I?" he growled, "How dare you Miss Granger! Your thoughtless actions almost quite possibly got you and I both killed, you insipid little girl. Do you have any clue as to the position you have now placed me in?" he all but bellowed, his grasp on his own anger wavering dangerously as he stared down at the girl lying trembling and terrified upon the silken sheets of his bed. "I have a right mind to simply turn you over to Lucius. You would quickly find Miss Granger, that I am a great deal more forgiving than my dear friend" he said threateningly, gaining a small amount of pleasure at the shocked look in her soft eyes, the scent of her fear closing a choking hand around his throat as she shook her head slowly in fear. "No, I did not think you would like that idea" he said callously, "I suggest then, that if you wish to avoid such a fate that you begin using that expansive intellect you claim to posses and try not to push my patience any further." Hermione could do no more than stare at him in shock, was this the same man that had touched her so intimately without really touching her? How could this possibly be the same man who despite her intense dislike of him had drawn genuine moans from her lips? She shuddered involuntarily at the memory of his fingers on her bare skin, the flesh of her thighs tingling where his expert and tender fingers had played a symphony of pleasure upon her so easily.
A blinding flare of rage flashed within Severus as he saw her shudder and a crimson blush spread across her cheeks. She is repulsed by me, humiliated by what she did. She thinks she is afraid now, I will show that insolent little whelp what real fear is he sneered to himself, his muscles suddenly buzzing and thrumming with fury. In a flash of swirling robes Severus had closed the remaining space between them, one knee placed upon the edge of the bed as he cruelly snatched her wrists, holding them tightly within an iron grip until she whimpered and squirmed pitifully.
"Please Professor… you… you are hurting me" she wailed softly, her eyes full of hurt as she pleaded with him. He snorted derisively as he glared down at her,
"You think you know pain you stupid girl?" he growled low and deep, his chest rumbling deeply. Whimpering like a wounded animal Hermione squeezed her eyes shut tight, turning her head away from him into the safety of the crook of her elbow.
"Don't you dare to turn away from me!" he bellowed menacingly. "Don't you dare cry your tears in front of me thinking that you know what it is to hurt and suffer!" Jumping at the sound of his irate voice so close, her eyes flew open and she quickly looked up to meet his obsidian gaze. "Perhaps Miss Granger it is time you had a lesson in what real pain is and how it can break a man's soul" he said in a venomous voice as he leant closer to her, stopping only when her face was mere inches from his own. Letting his eyes flutter closed for a moment in drew in a series of long breaths, rolling the scent of her fear across his tongue as though he were savoring the most sweet, delectable and rare of wines. "You reek of fear" he purred against her ear, his breath hot and heavy on her flesh.
A choked sob rolled over her lips as she once again began to turn her face away from him, his movements fast as lightening as he grasped both of her wrists in one hand pinning it forcefully to the bed so that he loomed over her. His now freed hand moved quickly to grip her face, his fingers savagely biting into her tender fresh, pressing against her teeth through her cheeks causing her to wince in pain. Eyes as black as pitch swept over her contorted face, admiring the shimmer of unshed tears in her imploring eyes. Quickly releasing her face he took a hold of the towel where it was gathered at her chest, smiling sadistically as she squirmed, vainly kicking her legs in an attempt to throw him off, all the while wailing her protests.
"No! Please Merlin no… don't do this… please Professor, no…"
For a brief moment Severus paused, suddenly consumed with a crushing guilt as what he was about to do, his hand trembling around the edge of the towel, his knuckles pressed to the warm flesh of her heaving chest. His anger wavered as he looked down at the sobbing girl beneath him, her face stained with tears, her hair forming a disheveled frame around her.
"Please, please…" she whimpered pitifully. "Please, I am so sorry…" her voice came ragged and broken between her sobs, "so sorry."
"Sorry?" he whispered as he looked down at her, feeling the heated length of her almost bare body against his own. "Sorry!" he spat vehemently, his teeth bared and gnashing dangerously as he leant ever closer to her, the fabric of his robes brushing against her pinned arms and her spread thighs. "Oh yes Miss Granger, you will indeed be sorry when I am through with you."
Without another moments thought or hesitation he hastily pulled the towel open, revealing in one swift movement her bare body as she wailed helplessly beneath him. His eyes glittered maniacally as they traveled over her young and nubile body, drinking in the sight of small pert breasts, the slight swell of her stomach, the delicious creamy expanses of her thighs and the small nest of honey-colored hair between her legs. A stifling wave of sickness suddenly rushed up from his stomach threatening to spill over his lips as he began to tremble violently. Swallowing hard he once again forced the bile back down into his stomach with a grimace of disgust, his mouth filled with the bitter and acrid taste of his own vomit. Oh Merlin what have I done? he asked in a small voice, how could I do such a thing to child in my charge, a child who needs my protection, a child who I was just about to violate so cruelly? Severus shuddered with self-hatred as he slowly released first the towel now lying open around Hermione, and then the grip upon her wrist, wincing as he saw the bruises already forming where his hand had bitten into her flesh.
Bowing his head in a shame that threatened to suffocate him he squeezed his shut eyes that suddenly felt decidedly moist with emotion. Hermione lay silent and unmoving, terrified as she felt the man above her shuddering uncontrollably, his hair brushing back and forth across her exposed chest as he shook his head slowly. Tentatively she lowered her aching arms, paying little attention to her bruised and throbbing wrists as she began gathering the towel to her once more, desperately trying to cover herself. Without a sound and as if on autopilot Severus withdrew his body from hers, rising slowly to his unsteady feet, his hair hanging limply in his face, succeeding in hiding the pain that was so obviously written across his face.
Numbly he turned and began walking slowly towards the doorway, his hands shaking at his sides as he fought to not empty the contents of his stomach right then and there. I cannot believe that I was about to… that I almost… that I… I… his mind stammered, unable even in the solitude of his own thoughts to admit the horrendous act he had been about to commit. She would have deserved it the purring voice began, rubbing against the insides of his skull like heated velvet, she might even have enjoyed it, it smirked sadistically. Impossible! She would never enjoy my touch, no one could possibly ever desire it, and I have just proven how utterly debase and vile I am he scowled in response, his anger once again flaring as self-loathing coursed through his veins like liquid fire. Unable to control his anger Severus released it in the only way he knew how, by channeling it towards someone else, namely Hermione who lay numb and silent upon the bed. Turning back towards her with a malevolent sneer he watched her tremble slightly, the towel once against covering the majority of her body.
"If you ever do something so completely mindless again, I will without hesitation and regret hand you to Lucius on a silver platter, do you understand me?" he hissed with a raw and passionate fury that threatened to ignite the world around him. She could do nothing but simply nod dumbly in response, the tears welling up in her eyes once more, precariously close to spilling down over her flushed cheeks.
A strained sigh rushed between Severus' gritted teeth as he squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration,
"And please Miss Granger, do try to save your tears for someone who gives a damn" he snapped cruelly before turning and quickly storming out of the door, letting it fall shut behind him with a resounding thud, the door and frame around it shuddering as though the entire castle would collapse at any minute. As soon as the thundering reverberations from the slamming door died away Hermione rolled onto her side, curling into a tight ball, her fingers clawing at the bed sheets as she squeezed her eyes shut, silent tears sliding down her cheeks before she broke into loud, unabashed heaving sobs.
Sinking into the wingback chair he had occupied earlier Severus rested his foot on the edge of the grate, the now almost completely dead fire reflected in the toe of his boot.. Resting his elbow upon the arm of the chair he curled a pale slender hand beneath his chin and stared with a fierce scowl at the chair opposite him. Lucius he growled heatedly as he continued to glare at the empty chair before him, his gaze so intense that the air around him shuddered and crackled. Suddenly the chair reeled backwards crashing into the far wall with a thud, wood and stuffing raining down upon the floor. Draping his hand across his eyes Severus let out a long and heavy sigh, biting back a howl of pain and frustration as guilt consumed him like a wild fire. Without looking up he mumbled under his breath in little more than a growl,
"Accio Fire Whiskey." His hand quickly snatched the bottle out of the air and without a moments pause he hastily removed the cork, casting it into the glowing embers of the fire and began to methodically drink himself into a mindless stupor as the shadows deepened around him.