So this fic is basically gonna be made up of flashbacks between Ryan and Kirsten. Well I think so for now anyway might change my mind later lol.

Thanks for the reviews I really appreciate them. Remember to review even if you don't like it but no flaming please!

Enjoy

Chapter 2

Ryan held the receiver firmly against his ear, "Hey," he said softly trying to ignore the two sets of eyes on him. The three of them sat around the kitchen island all taking turns to talk to her, "How you doing?"

"Shit." She admitted after a pause, "It's hard." Ryan nodded mutely not knowing what to say.

"Can you hold on a sec?" he asked her.

"Sure," she answered frowning. She heard him excuse himself politely and the sound of a clicking door followed, "Where are you? I only have like five minutes left. There's a queue."

"I'm in the pool house. Just wanted to talk to you alone." He said softly, "I miss you."

She sighed.

"I miss you too." She whispered, "I can't wait to get home." Ryan closed his eyes and dipped his head savouring the sound of her voice.

"I can't stop thinking about you. I mean… Kirsten… I…"

"I know. I'll be home soon though okay? I'm getting better." There was a pause and he heard Kirsten sigh heavily. He frowned. It sounded more like she was blowing her hair away from her face. Then it hit him.

"Are you smoking?" He said accusingly. Kirsten giggled.

"One addiction to another. At least it'll take longer to kill me… look Ryan I gotta go."

"Okay. I'll see you soon though right?"

"Yeah soon… bye."

Ryan flicked through Seth's latest comic book. He was bored. After a second he gave up and threw it to the floor. The dim light from his bedside table made his eyes water. Just as he reached over to switch it off he heard a soft knock at the door. He checked his alarm. Eleven thirty. He frowned knowing it was probably Seth seeking to talk about the shooting again. "Come in," he called. As the door swung open he saw Kirsten standing in the doorway, "Hey Kirsten, how was your trip?" he said surprised to find her visiting him so late. She smiled and made her way through the door.

"Yeah it was okay. Just wanted to say goodnight and to let you know I was home," she paused before settling down on the bed, "I heard about Luke. And your friend Donnie." Ryan opened his mouth to say something but she shook her head, "It's okay. Sandy told me. You work with him right?"

"Uh yeah. We weren't really friends. He crashed this party and… he had a gun."

"You were brave. Jumping in like that." As she said that she realised he must've witnessed shootings before, "I mean… weren't you scared?" Ryan curled his lip slightly.

"Yeah but you know… yeah I don't know. I guess it was just instinct." Kirsten nodded.

"Well I just wanted to make sure you were okay." She said quietly. Ryan smiled.

"Where's Sandy?" he asked noticing that the lights were out in the main house.

"Uh work. I think I managed to get about ten minutes with him before his pager went off." She said chuckling, "So you and Marissa? On or off?"

"Off I think. She was here tonight but… with Luke in the hospital I think she kinda realised…" he trailed off and dipped his head not wanting her to see his disappointment.

"Well I'm gonna go to bed. So I'll see you in the morning." She said getting up from the bed. Ryan nodded and watched as she made her way across the patio and into the house.

He tried to push his thoughts of Kirsten out of his head. Shouldn't he be thinking about Marissa? He put his feelings down to his admiration. She had taken him in, given him a home. She was the wife of his new hero and he couldn't get her out of his mind. Everything about her was stored away in his head. The way her hips swayed as she walked. How she swirled her wine glass in her left hand after dinner. The way her hair draped her face early in the morning before she had a chance to style it. He decided that was when she was at her most beautiful.

He checked his clock for the fifth time. Four twenty five. He pulled his sheet off his body and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He contemplated pulling on his sweats but it was a warm night and he knew no one would be up so he padded across the patio to the kitchen. He reached for the switch and filled the room with light. A small figure jumped startled at the kitchen table, "Ryan! You scared me!" she said clutching her chest. A glass of red wine stood in front of her.

"Sorry, I couldn't sleep." He said shielding his eyes as they adjusted to the light.

"Me either. I can't sleep if Sandy's not home." She said softly. She sat cross-legged on the chair in a pair or pink shorts and a matching vest. She unravelled her long legs and pushed her chair back allowing her enough space to step out from the table. Ryan frowned. Why wasn't Sandy home yet? "You want some juice or something?" she asked heading for the fridge.

"Yeah that'd be good." He said quietly as he watched her reach up to the top shelf. Her top rode up revealing more flesh. She stood on her tiptoes accenting the muscles in her legs. She had killer legs. She turned and found him staring at her and she blushed. Ryan took the juice box from her grip still staring. He knew she knew he was looking but he could sense she liked it. She didn't move away. She didn't try and hide or make excuses to leave. Instead she moved towards him slowly. She trailed her hand along the breakfast bar and stopped a few feet from him. Kirsten dipped her head slightly before looking back up amused as she noticed the bulge in his boxers. He should've worn his sweats. His cheeks reddened and he looked away trying to compose himself but he felt her hand trace his arm up to his bicep and he looked back at her. Her eyes were filled with lust as he swooped down to brush his lips against hers. He could smell the liquor on her breath and she ran her lips across his own. Her left hand rested on his shoulder and her right ran up and down his chest slowly. He placed both hands on her hips and pulled him toward her as she opened her mouth allowing him to slide his tongue in gradually.

She tasted nicotine and coffee. His tongue swirled with her own as she lost herself in his touch. He pressed his throbbing groin into her hip and she kissed him more harshly pulling him down by the hair. She felt his hands run down her back and under her ass where he lifted her off her feet and onto the counter. It was strangely reminiscent of her evening with Sandy earlier. Before he left for work. Before they had a chance to greet each other properly. Before she was back in the same place and same position with her foster son. She pulled away suddenly and he looked at her confused. His hair stood up from where she had ran her hands through it before and his eyes were glazed over slightly. He leaned back in and placed butterfly kisses along her collarbone pausing only to lift her top over her head. She moaned and wrapped her legs around his waist pushing her hands into his boxers. "Ryan," she said breathlessly. He groaned as she pushed his boxers to the floor, "Is this…?" she asked, "Is this okay?" He curled his lip again and pulled her forcefully toward him.

"What do you think?"

Ryan smiled at the memory. She was so careful that first night. So afraid of pushing him too far. She didn't want him to feel like he had to or that she was taking advantage. She'd even visited him a few days later and apologised while both Sandy and Seth were out collecting dinner.

That's when it happened again. They had both elicited some strange looks when Seth and Sandy came home to find Kirsten's hair a little more dishevelled than usual and Ryan's beater on inside out. He chuckled as he tried to remember their excuse but it was long forgotten. He thought of her voice on the phone. She sounded strong at times but she had little moments of weakness. Her hesitations and pauses on the phone were enough to show that she was still having a hard time of it. Her voice cracked as she said goodbye to the three people she loved the most. Ryan wasn't only missing her as a lover. He wanted her back as a part of the family. The manor was eerily empty without her presence. It was as though it could never feel full again until her return. The doctors had estimated three months. So that was five weeks to go.

Five weeks.

Thirty-five days.

Eight hundred and forty hours.

Fifty thousand four hundred minutes.

He was still missing her.

In case you didn't get that the flashback was set at the end of The Outsider.

Thanks for reading. Please review and tell me your thoughts