Gomen gomen gomen!!! It's a long story, but I've been busy with school and then my harddrive crashed and we spent weeks trying to get it back up. When we finally did get it working again I lost ALL my files, including all my writing, my fanfiction, my manuscripts, my schoolwork, everything! So…needless to say I was a little disheartened about writing for awhile. But, I'm back and hope to be finishing this fanfiction relatively soon. Sorry again, and I hope you like this chapter. Thanks for the reviews too, I've gotten one almost every day since I got my computer back and that's what convinced me to keep writing. I probably would have just given up otherwise, you guys are the best!
Chapter Eight Stop Fourteen: Paris, France
Since that first night in Beijing, Mitsuki had been more careful about the songs she chose and consequently, more distant with Takuto. They had been on tour for three and a half months and still saw every city together. After Mitsuki had told a Polish woman in Warsaw her body guards were harassing her, they'd simply stopped following the two, so they were free to go where they wanted. Of all the cities they'd seen so far though, Mitsuki was most excited about Paris.
"Come on!" she whined at Takuto's door early the first morning of their week in France. "There's so much to do!"
A few minutes later, the door swung open, and Takuto emerged, wiping sleep from his eyes, "What could there possibly be to do at seven o'clock in the morning?"
She laughed and took his arm, "There's the Eiffel Tower, the Louvre, Notre Dame, Sacre Coeur, L'Arc de Triomphe-"
"Okay, I know," he sighed, "you win."
"I always win," she laughed triumphantly.
"Well, I wasn't trying," Takuto retorted.
"Sure sure," she rolled her eyes as they head out.
Once on the streets of Paris, Mitsuki grabbed a tax, "Le Tour D'Eiffel s'il vous plaît," she told the driver in choppy French.
"D'accord."
"Where'd you learn that?" Takuto inquired.
"Ooshige-san taught me a little," she replied, and he nodded. Both of them had been taught how to say things to the crowd in whatever the native language of that country was, but normally it wasn't until right before show time.
"So you had this planned," he joked.
"Yep, basically," she replied as the taxi stopped. She handed the man his faire plus a tip, and they got out to stop and stare at the beauty of the tower. "Wow," Mitsuki whispered like she had so many times in the last three and a half months. Each country had taken her breath away; it was something she was sure she'd never get used to.
"Shall we go up?" Takuto asked gently, and she nodded. They headed across the street, but someone ripped Mitsuki away from Takuto in a sea of people, and the two were separated.
"Mitsuki?" Takuto called when he had crossed and found she was missing, "Mitsuki!" his heart was racing, where was she? He jogged back across the rue and searched the crowds of people for his lost partner, but it was all to no avail, "She'll know to come back here," he assured himself as he spotted a nearby café. Resolving to wait for her, he headed to the café, purchased a cup of coffee (with some trouble) then sat at a table facing the street.
"Takuto?" she cocked her head to view her surroundings.
"He's fine," Jonathan laughed at her, and she spun, glaring viciously.
"Where is he?" she started to walk from the alley, but Jonathan pushed a large dumpster in her path.
"He's in good Parisian hands," he promised, chuckling sadistically.
Mitsuki's eyes narrowed, "And what is that supposed to mean, mm?"
"Oh, I'm sure you'll find out eventually. For now, how about you be a nice little girl and stay put?" with her trapped like a rat in a maze, he disappeared.
"Wanna make a few euros?" Izumi inquired in fluent French.
The girl smile and poked her head out of the dumpster.
"If I fix you up do you think you can seduce the man over there?" he pointed to Takuto, and she nodded eagerly. "There's a catch though," his eyes twinkled maliciously, "you need to do it without speaking."
She sized the man up, without speaking it would be challenging, yet…he seemed worth his money. His clothes were new and good; his nails clean and his hair slicked back. Deciding he would pay, she nodded again and held out a hand.
He grinned and slapped one hundred euros into her palm, "Excellent," he whispered, pulling a bag from behind his back and giving it to her. "Put this on and be back here in fifteen minutes," he ordered as she snatched the bag from his hands, "Oh, and I would highly suggest not running."
She smiled and agreed; a man that was worth his money was also worth his threats. She had no idea why he wanted this from her, but she didn't care as long as she got paid. Humming softly to herself, she skipped away.
"Mitsuki! There you are!" Takuto cried when he saw her walking across the street. The girl's eyes creased when she realized he didn't speak French. Muttering to herself, she walked toward him, smiling, "I was so worried."
Instead of responding, she slipped a cool hand down his cheek, and his eyes widened in response. This was odd…
"What's gotten into you?" he pulled her hand down after a self-debate. "Why aren't y-?"
She put a finger to his lips, silencing him. Slowly, tauntingly, she reached up and replaced her finger with her lips.
He seemed to sigh inwardly, so long he'd been waiting for this moment and finally…His body screamed with the feel of her under his fingers, and Izumi grinned from nearby. The illusion never failed. Once, it had worked in Mitsuki's favor, now it worked against her, but so was life.
"Voulez vous couchez avec moi?" she murmured against his ear.
He laughed, "You've gotten good Mitsuki-chan, or have you just been practicing that one? I bet Ooshige didn't teach you that."
She pouted softly, reminding him of her words and what they meant. His head was screaming no, but his body had long since won this battle. He'd been without her for too long. He took her hand and led her back to their hotel, or what he thought was their hotel.
Izumi gave Jonathan a nod, and he grinned and flew back to let Mitsuki out.
"What's the meaning of this?" Mitsuki demanded irritably as Jonathan removed the dumpster barrier. She'd tried to scale it to no avail, so she was caged until Jonathan came to her aid.
"You'll see, Izumi and I have a surprise for you."
Her face paled as she began to run after the Shinigami, Ooshige!
She ran harder and faster than she'd run in her life, breaking through crowds of people, not listening to the insults that were thrown at her, not that she'd be able to understand them anyway. Finally, out of breath, she reached her hotel half a mile away and followed Jonathan inside warily. Her heart was gripped in fear. What was she to expect?
She was led to Takuto's door where Izumi awaited her, "I thought you should see this Mi-ki, the barrier was to keep you from preventing it. Clearly, he wanted it."
"What are you talking about?"
"Look for yourself," he challenged, motioning to the door.
She eyed him suspiciously and gripped the doorknob with clammy hands as he unlocked it for her, watching eagerly. Taking a deep breath, she pushed it open and let her eyes fall in and onto one of the most heart wrenching scenes of her life.
Takuto was shirtless on top of a pretty French girl whose hair was disheveled. The girl had deep brown hair and matching eyes, and her black dress was wrinkled and slightly torn at the shoulder. Takuto must have heard her soul-shattering gasp because he turned around and looked at her, horrified, "Mitsuki?"
She couldn't take hearing her name on his lips, so she turned and ran from the room. Tears cascaded heavily down her cheeks as she forced weary legs on. He was supposed to be different! She was forced to slow for her sobs, and he caught her shoulder gently, "Mitsuki, I don't understand."
She spun viciously to face him. With all her anger, she reached out and smacked him hard across the face, "Takuto no baka!" she hissed, and he recoiled.
There was that desert again, and that little girl screaming those very same words at him…
The tears from his watering eyes cleared it up as he winced from her impact.
"Mitsuki, I can explain. Well, no, but…we got separated, so I decided to wait for you at this café right near the Tower," he began.
"Oh, and she waltzed in to take your mind off losing me?" she asked angrily.
"No," he protested. "You walked in. Only, it wasn't you- I guess, but it-it looked like you. It didn't speak, only acted. I thought she was you; she was you, only-not so much."
She threw her head back and laughed maliciously, "Well, that's the best story I've heard all year!" then suddenly, she got dangerously quiet. "And even if you were somehow magically deceived, you should have known it wasn't mean," she lowered her head, suddenly interested in the ground.
"How was I supposed to know? She looked just like you!"
"Oh, I don't know," she whispered sarcastically, "maybe because she speaks French for starters."
"She never spoke except for once and then I thought she was you being a tease."
"Even if that were the highly unbelievable case, and she were me, or just like me, you still shouldn't have taken advantage of her or me or whoever!"
"She came onto me!"
"Would I do that?" Mitsuki shouted furiously, and he backed away from her rage. "How long have you known me Takuto? And you don't know me at all. You should have been able to know us apart," by this time she knew the girl had been hired and hidden by Izumi, but that still didn't excuse Takuto. She thought he knew her better than that.
"No, I-I didn't think th-"
"No, you didn't think," she whispered, but her whisper was more dangerous than her cries could ever be.
His head spun, what had happened? There was absolutely no way he could mistake the girl he was with for Mitsuki, so how…? She had looked like her. Or maybe that was just my excuse, his mind pondered glumly. But she had! He was sure of it, "Mitsuki, I'm so sorry," he begged forgiveness, unable to think of anything else to do.
"I know," she muttered. "I know, so am I," she turned and walked away, but he found his feet were frozen. His heart seized; she was walking out of his life forever.
"Mitsuki!"
Is there no way for my words to reach you? His head reeled. So many things were wrong here. Where had his sanity gone to?
Their emotions never reached Paris, and everyone saw it. Everyone was sure that it was going to be the end of the tour, but Mitsuki's closing song struck romantic hearts like an arrow whether or not they spoke Japanese. It was all they needed to see her sing her broken hear to them all, and it was more than Takuto could bear.
"I'm sorry I loved you; I'll not try that again. I'm sorry I ran; in a race I couldn't win. This time will truly be the end.
"I saw your eyes; the words were plain. I smiled and died, cut through the pain. It wasn't what I wanted, not what I needed. She was right when she taunted, but I never heeded. Maybe I'll cry, maybe this time. Maybe I'll sigh, maybe this time."
"God, I wish I didn't speak Japanese," he wished softly, which caused Izumi to grin wickedly and Omori to give him an encouraging smile.
"I'm sorry I loved you; I'll not try that again. I'm sorry I ran, in a race I couldn't win. This time will truly be the end.
"I'm tired of wishing, down on my knees; I'm tired of praying, bleeding with ease. Maybe you'll love me, maybe you'll miss me. Maybe you'll hate me, but don't-leave me hanging here."
She seemed to put all her anguish into a single song, and the crowd was moved as tears began to slip down her cheeks.
"Mitsuki-chan," he whispered, desperately wanting to run onstage and pull her into his arms. The only thing that stopped him was him knowing that she would only push him away.
"In this realm of my darkness, it's you I truly fear. In this endless hallway, silent starkness, you and your quiet leer. I will never be alone again!"
The anger that snapped in her eyes made a few people gasp and caused Takuto's heart to crumble further, all because of him…
"The dark and his blankets, will wrap up their friend. Words are of the past…" she lowered her head. Eichi-kun, you wouldn't have done this to me… "I'm sorry I loved you; I'll not try that again. I'm sorry I ran, in a race I couldn't win. This time will truly be the end. Truly be the end…"
"Merci toute la monde!" Mitsuki waved a weary hand through their cheering. "Merci beaucoup!"
"Je t'aime Mitsuki!"
"Encore! Encore!"
Mitsuki smiled softly, and Takuto entered to give them their encore. But "Same Rhyme" was a poor job as Takuto tried his best to communicate his love through their music, but it was nothing without her smile, and the cheers were weaker when they finished.
"Where are we headed next?" Mitsuki asked Ooshige, hanging onto her cheer by her pinky nails.
"Next?" Ooshige seemed surprised, "You mean…you want to continue?"
"Of course. I have to get my message out," Mitsuki answered softly, "with or without Takuto."
"Yes, but Mistuki-chan-" Ooshige faltered. How could she tell Mitsuki that her performance in Paris hadn't gotten her message across? She didn't want to hurt her.
"Without Ta-kun your message means nothing," Izumi solved Ooshige's problem.
"That's no-" but Mitsuki knew she couldn't finish her protest; Izumi was absolutely right. Takuto and his love were her message. But now, but now… "I still have to go on though; people are expecting me to go on."
Ooshige smiled, "You amaze me with your determination Mitsuki-chan."
Mitsuki grinned and hugged her manager close. She would go on; it might ruin her live career, but she had to go on. She had promised to keep singing, Takuto and Meroko; she'd promised them, and she wouldn't break the promise.
It was in Dublin that Takuto sang for her, "I wrote this song for a friend," he mumbled in rough English. "And…uh…I think I broke her heart, but, this is for her."
Mitsuki couldn't help but be touched by his words as he turned to meet her eyes for the first time in a week and a half. She was surprised neither of them shied from the gaze but found herself falling again, all the same. She had explored Paris and Dublin alone, and it stung awfully. Now, seeing those eyes, she didn't feel so alone.
He let her look through him as his fingers found the chords on his guitar easily. It wasn't until the intro was over that he tore his eyes away and faced his fans with an open, bleeding heart, "No more rain checks, no more sidesteps, just where do we stand, when you're holding my hand? I haven't slept since we met."
His fingers hit the notes ruthlessly as the music picked up, "And I hate you, and I love you; somehow they're all the same. I opened my arms to jump and flew, only to come crashing down, totally lame.
"The nights are cold when I'm all alone (I promise you.) You haven't called, are you home? Why can't I just focus? Maybe I've completely lost it (lost it all to you)" His pleading eyes met hers as everything she loved in him came flying back to her…
"Full Moon is the dream that you and I created," she whispered softly, and his eyes smiled.
"Whenever I was with you, somehow, it felt like I was making music along with you," his eyes hid all that she wanted to find, and her heart clutched tightly…
"I'm going to protect you. I'm not going to let you die"…
"I'm enragèd with your love, are our feelings matched? Or am I in constant mourning, 'cause I've come so…attached? But I'm sick of your stories! They're starting to bore me! While our smiles stay on, the stage lights are on. Don't frown, never frown, you might let somebody down," he turned and smiled weakly at her, such passion lighting in his eyes, passion that burned her heart. How much longer could she hold this grudge? She felt her heart crumbling.
"I wanna push you away, but I want you to spend the night. I wanna block out all that you say and kiss you till it's all all right. I wanna make you cry, but I never wanna see you cry, I just don't want another lie; I think I'm ready to lie down and die."
Mitsuki's eyes widened. He was that hurt?
Izumi heard a soft voice screaming angrily, "No!"
"Me-chan?" he searched desperately but could find no one.
"And the morning sun rises; I'm tired and sick. But I'm not any wiser and less able to think (what a nice little trick).
"I'm enragèd with your love, are our feelings matched? Or am I in constant mourning, 'cause I've come so…attached? But I'm sick of your stories! They're starting to bore me! While our smiles stay on, the stage lights are on. Don't frown, never frown, you might let somebody down.
"I love you, but I hate you; I hate you and then I love you. You're crying, you're smiling; somehow it's all the same. We're flying, we're dying; it's all the same. Everything is just the same…" Even when the crowd started screaming he didn't break away from her eyes, "Mitsuki, I love you," he whispered into the microphone, and her eyes flew open as the crowd stilled…
"I know that telling you this won't accomplish anything; you're a human, I'm a Shinigami. It's just something I have to do. I love you, Mitsuki…"
Her eyes welled with tears, not again; she would not lose him again.
"Go Mitsuki-chan," Ooshige handed her her microphone, and she walked onstage, "So you're far away," she sang a cappella, and Takuto laughed, relieved.
"So I have nothing left to say."
"But my smile still melts away."
"And the rain comes down this day."
The band was able to catch up as the crowd roared their approval, even though most of them didn't understand what had taken place. Their message was clear again.
"But at night I thought of you."
"Thought of what we couldn't be."
"And your heart fades from blue."
"I know why there was no we."
She walked forward and took his hand, blushing softly. He kissed her cheek to be rewarded with a deafening approval from the crowd. They sang as one that night.
Izumi sighed miserably; he was running out of ideas, "She just will not give up," he muttered.
"It's called love."
He spun and shook his head, pushing his fluttering heart downward, "You're wrong Me-chan."
"No," she shook her head, and her short pink hair whipped behind her, "You are. Haven't you seen her around him enough to realize you underestimate love?"
"I-she's just stubborn."
"The only stubborn one I see around here is you Izumi-kun," she laughed lightly. "But again I see-"
"Please don't leave Me-chan," he found himself pleading, "I miss you."
She looked down at him with sadness that tore through him, "You can't; you don't believe in love," and she faded away.
His heart felt strange; he felt…no his duty hissed. You have other things to worry about. He nodded resolutely and jumped from the steeple he was on, off to relieve Jonathan.
"You know," Takuto pulled her chin up, so her eyes met his, "I was serious out there."
"I know," Mitsuki answered, "but I-"
"Can't forgive me that easily?"
She nodded, and he sighed and dropped his hold on her as they continued their nighttime stroll. Of all the places they'd traveled they knew this was the most dangerous. Still, in the city they felt safe enough to walk at night.
"It's funny, to think that this country is war-torn and tattered, but they manage to find something to smile about, anything. It's like you said; it's easy to appreciate everything when you think of having nothing. That's how I've felt the last week and a half. Without you, I was able to take in everything; your strength, that resilient smile you always wear, compassion, your unrelenting determination. I'd loved them before, but now I can see myself without them, and Mitsuki-" she faced him as he spoke to her soul, "I don't ever want to be without them again."
"Takuto…" but she could think of nothing to say into those eyes, so she said just that- nothing. Instead, she turned her eyes toward the moon and thought of all she'd lost in her short sixteen years. Her mother, her father, Eichi, Meroko, even Takuto to some extent. Then she thought of all she stood to lose, Wakouji, Ooshige, what was left of Takuto, even herself. So much weight had been placed on her shoulders when all she wanted to do was be at peace with the one she loved, finally. He was beside her, yet…she couldn't reach out to him. The hole in her heart increased.
He left her in her silence as they walked, afraid to upset what little peace they'd restored. For the last week and a half he'd tried to figure out what had happened in Paris. He'd fallen across the idea it was stress and, though it wasn't satisfying, he'd stuck with that. It was hard to accept, a stress that cost him everything. For so long he'd yearned to touch her, to taste her, but now the idea seemed foolish. In the past ten days he'd come to realize how precious just being around her was.
When she turned from looking at the sky, tears glittered like stars in her eyes, "God Takuto, you hurt me so badly," she whispered. "But it doesn't matter, my heart still aches when you're not around, longs to be free of so many chains. We just can't be together, not without constant sadness, but I still-"
Impulsively, he pulled her into his chest and let her cry. Her tiny fists curled around his shirt as she buried her head near his neck, crying softly. He stroked her hair like he had so many times before and begged the heavens to make her happy.
When her tears had ceased, she looked up into his eyes while he brushed away her tears with gentle fingers, "Will you sing to me?" he asked, and she smiled and nodded.
From Dublin, they headed to London where the two saw Big Ben and toured Buckingham Palace. In Nuuk they basked in hot springs surrounded by snow. In Quebec City they went shopping on cobblestone streets and in Vancouver horseback riding through the biting cold. Seattle brought them Pike's Market and the space needle while Los Angeles offered Hollywood and sun bathing. Then, finally, Mitsuki arrived in Las Vegas, the place she least wanted to be- the place that she needed to confront and finally put to rest.