My Heart Belongs to You
The Fight and Tears
Lily sighed out. Her eyes shined with tears. Why was she fighting with James? It was so hard to tell. It wasn't really her fault it wasn't his either. It was stupid and immature; it was about who else but Keri Teri and William Terret.
How that conversation came up you ask? Well quite simply.
Flashback"Lily! It wasn't me! You should've known that from the start! I wouldn't ever do something like that!" James tried to explain to Lily.
They had been in the Room of Requirement the night before. Terret and Keri had once again tried to break Lily and James up, this time their plan was working.
Keri had cornered Lily and started telling her that she had been with James the night before, and they had been making out. Though in reality, this was not true. Terret had caught James and kept him busy for the duration of an hour or so, but Lily did not know this.
"James! Don't lie to me! You were with her last night!" Lily said tears streaming down her face now. It was a river. James stepped closer to her to try and stop them. Lily was getting mad. "No James! Don't touch me! I hate you! I can't believe you could do that!" She screamed and ran out before James could react.
Later that night had spoken to Remus who told her that he was with James that whole night. He couldn't have been with Teri. That was when Lily went to apologize. When it went wrong.
End Flashback
When Lily finished Sirius gave her a curious look. He didn't seem to understand. Something wasn't quite right.
"Lily, ever think that maybe that wasn't James?" Sirius said carefully. Lily looked at him with a look of utmost confusion. It had to have been James. He was making out with Teri. End of discussion, or that's what Lily believed.
"Do explain, I would love to hear this one!" Lily said sarcastically. Sirius ignored the sarcasm in her voice and went on.
"Well you see Lily, they're so intent on getting you and James to break up that its pretty ridiculous now. They've tried everything. Maybe this was just part of their scheme." Sirius suggested. It was farfetched, but what could she expect? It did come out of Sirius' mouth so of course it was farfetched.
"Sirius, it was James. It couldn't have been anyone else." Lily said rationally. Sirius gave her a look that clearly said, 'what are you? A muggle?' Lily gave him a questioning look.
"Polyjuice Potion." Sirius said as if it was the simplest thing in the world. Lily gave a comprehending look.
"Then who was it Mr. Smart Guy?" Lily asked teasingly. She needed to laugh at something.
"Terret maybe… or Snape… or Malfoy… or someone else… I don't know!" Sirius said. Lily looked at him as if he were insane. Yet she loved the way his brain worked. That was something she would never have thought of.
"Sirius. I don't think so honestly. Though it is of course a possibility. I'm just so… hurt…" Lily confessed.
Sirius gave her a sympathetic look and put a comforting arm around her as she sobbed into his chest.
Lily hated crying, but this was the only thing she hated more. She didn't hate James, quite the opposite. She loved him, but she hated what he did to her. She was madly in love with him, and wouldn't do anything to ever hurt him, but he was hurting more. She was hurting him more than anyone ever could. Then Lily would ever let anyone before James.
James was the love of her life. She always knew that to love someone, you had to know how to hate the person first. If you can truly hate someone, but love the person at the exact same time, then you are in love. At least that was what her mother had always told her.
Only one person in the world could do that to her. James. She hated him so much right now, but still she wanted to be with him. In his arms, crying to him, and not Sirius.
"How do I get over him Sirius? I don't want to care about him anymore." Lily said, even though she knew she was lying. She couldn't take it she had to hate him; there was no way around it.
"I don't know, I don't think you can Lily. You love him, and nothing will change that." Sirius said with an airy tone. He was trying to sound calm and collected, but he was doing just as bad as she was if not worse.
"I hate this Sirius. I'm madly in love with him, and I hate him so much right now I could hex him to death." Lily said, tears running down her face. This was way to overwhelming. She didn't know what to do, how to handle it. Natalie couldn't help. Andromeda wouldn't know what to do, she was to busy with Remus.
"I know Lily, I know. It's okay it will all work out in the end." Sirius said trying to sound confident, though deep down he wasn't confident at all, he was feeling down trodden, and hurt, just like Lily was.
This was turning out to be a horrible mistake. She was going to die without James. She couldn't stand being without him, and she couldn't stand being with him. It was a no win situation, and she knew it all too well. She had to decide soon, did she want James, or did she not want him?
It was turning out quite hard hating him. She couldn't do it; she couldn't let herself hate him. She wanted to though, and that was the problem. She wanted to hate him with a burning passion, but she wanted to love him with that same passion, but right now, he had to believe she hated him.
Like it or not, she had to hate him. The more she hated him, the quicker he'd realize he loved her more than the wizarding world. She would become a muggle all over again if that's what it would take to have James, she didn't care. She would go to the end of the world and back, but the question now is would he?
A/N: So sorry for the lack of updating this week, it's been hectic. Practice till 7monday and tuesday... wendsday same thing, except my siister injured her knee at practice adn strained the ligements and is out of the water for atleast 3weeks... so im upset about that. So after that, I had to wait on her hand and foot, cuz she is in a full leg cast, and can't bend her leg... then on top of that thursday i had a swim meet,and we won, and did really well, but i was upset... then 2night i had to play at the football game after practice. So I got home like an hour ago, and finished writing this chapter... which i apologize cuz its so short! but it's the best i could do this week... I have to go now, so review! thanks to all who did! I'll trie and post again this week-end, but i wont gaurentee it cuz i gots a lotta home work!
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Crazy Lily