Disclaimer: This is based on the work of Tamora Pierce.
Chapter 23 - Emotions
Alanna, Harailt and Numair were all taken to the infirmary at Duke Baird's orders and though Alanna assured him she was fine, he fixed her with that stern look that told her she would not be considered fine until he had declared it so. She and Harailt supported Numair as they walked. Numair was completely drained and exhausted. Alanna saw him searching for Daine, but she had left. Numair became withdrawn and never uttered a single word throughout the walk.
Alanna couldn't imagine why Daine had left. She found herself irritated with the girl. She waited impatiently for Duke Baird to give his declaration of her perfectly healthy state so that she could go. The Duke's attentions were focused on Numair though, and since he was clearly in the worst shape, that was how it should be. Alanna stepped up slyly when Duke Baird had his back turned and touched Numair with her magic. He was in terrible shape with more fresh scars from nearly being pulled apart from the force of the window and damaged heart and lungs that showed signs of a slow healing spell from Duke Baird.
The Duke turned and fixed her with a somewhat amused expression. "Questioning my healing talents, Lioness?" he asked.
"Never. I just wanted to know what you weren't sharing." She realized with a start that Numair was awake. He had been so silent that she thought he would be sleeping. "What happened down there? I thought you would connect with Daine to keep this from happening."
He merely looked at her with eyes that pleaded to be left alone. He clearly didn't want to be questioned.
Duke Baird laid a hand on Numair's head and sleep overcame him abruptly. She could see him try to fight it. But he blinked five times and drifted away. Then Duke Baird turned his attentions to her. After a moment of probing magic, he said, "You're fine."
"I could have told you that," she snipped in a sassy manner.
"If you're wondering, he wouldn't tell me either," the Duke remarked, indicating Numair. "If he hadn't had the presence of mind to put some of his essence in those aquamarines before it was tainted with the other magic, I doubt he would be around at all. He amazes me really. So much power – and yet he's just as fragile as you and me. I cannot imagine. But I wouldn't trade my healing gift for what he has. The big magic would scare me senseless."
Alanna grinned at his candor. "We all carry the sword we were meant to," she advised sagely.
"I had wanted to check all the survivors too, but I'm missing one. Any guess where Miss Sarrasri went to?"
"Maybe I should go hunt for her," she said a little coldly.
"I get the feeling I have missed something here and it might be something important to my patient. Care to fill me in?"
"It's not my secret," she answered.
"Depression is not conducive to healing," he commented slyly. "Maybe you could fix that."
He turned and walked to Harailt, leaving Alanna to stare after him. Sometimes he's so wise it scares me, Alanna thought. She decided her first obligation was to go give news to Jon though.
She walked into the corridor where Thayet and Buri were passing through. Thayet was beaming at the return of her closest friend and confidant. "Alanna!" Buri and Thayet said together and laughed at the coincidence.
"How are you?" Alanna asked Buri.
"I'm good thanks to the rescue. That was some – wow – I have not seen anything like that before. Hope I don't have to again."
"I've never worked with power quite like it before either. I think I'll stick to sword-fighting," Alanna replied.
"Did you – did the elemental magic give you knowledge of spells or just more power?" Thayet asked.
"Too much power. I didn't suddenly have knowledge I didn't have before, although I've not studied as much about elemental magic as the others. Harailt really knew what he was doing. I imagine Numair would be much the same."
"He did some frightening stuff in the cavern – melted the monsters to nothing," Buri revealed.
"I know you and Harailt looked frightening. Were you aware of the height change?" Thayet questioned.
"Yes, but I didn't pay much attention to anything else," Alanna returned. "I was more focused on what I had to do."
"Your eyes had green rings in them," Thayet stated. "There were also green streaks in your hair. Harailt too."
"Numair looked like that. The added height on him made him seem giant. And the weird eyes and hair didn't help. I've never seen Daine shrink from him before," Buri observed. "But weirdest was the voice – like two people instead of one." She shuddered visibly.
"You know, we were worried about the possibility that a few immortals would come charging out of there. That must have been decided on the spur of the moment," Alanna remarked.
"I couldn't say," Buri told her. "How is he?"
"He will be alright. I was just going to go contact Jon if you'd like to come."
Thayet smiled broadly. "Yes, very much."
Once they had contacted Jon, he was eager for as many details as she could give. "I can see Buri. Did everyone else get out alright?" Gary was at his side obviously eager for news of his nephew.
"Yes, everyone made it home."
"How is Numair?"
"Resting. Baird says he will be down for a couple of days."
"How bad was it?"
"Well you know Numair. Sometimes I think he gets a thrill from testing how much he can pound on the Black God's door without getting invited in." Jon, Gary, Thayet and Buri all laughed.
"When he's rested, I think I'm going to need him, Daine and Tkaa to head south. As for you, Alanna, how long do you think you'll need before I can dispatch you somewhere?"
"Why?" she asked alarmed. "What has happened?"
"The northern commander, Sir Tennemen, is dead. The Scanrans attacked along the border in four places. I need someone I can trust to pull them together, someone better able to think on their feet. I think that's got to be you."
"If that's what you need, give me a day to rest and I'll go. I guess I'll be saying goodbye to George by fire again," she added regretfully.
"I'm sorry, Alanna. No one wants it this way."
After she left the room so that Thayet could chat with her husband, Alanna stood outside the infirmary door, trying to decide how to find Daine. She wasn't completely sure what she'd say when she did. She was angry that Daine would leave Numair when he was hurt like that, but sympathetic that Daine had been so frightened. She also tried to remember how tangled her own emotions had been at 16. That maybe wasn't the best example. In her 30s now, it was easy to look back and see that she never belonged with Jon, and yet she would never regret that time they had. She could vaguely remember how confused thoughts of love made her in her teen years. Could she really expect Daine to grow up faster than she had herself? To herself and to George, Daine and Numair seemed so perfectly matched that she found it hard to understand why they weren't already together. But then maybe others thought that about her and George back then. She was sure Eleni had known they would end up happily married.
Also, she knew that Daine could choose another path. She had heard rumors about the breakup between Daine and Perin, but had never actually confirmed any of it with the parties involved. Maybe there was good reason for Numair to hesitate in sharing his feelings with Daine. It would be wrong of her to unleash her temper on a girl who was probably behaving appropriately for her age. Daine tended to be so level-headed that it was easy to forget that she was barely sixteen.
She had stood in the hallway irresolute for nearly a quarter of an hour when a disheveled Daine slipped silently into the hallway. She was still dirty and still wearing Numair's cloak. She seemed to be walking in her own world, barely aware of her surroundings. She almost walked straight in to Alanna.
"Sorry," Daine mumbled. Her face was tear-streaked and her hair was badly tangled.
"Youngling, Duke Baird won't let you in his infirmary looking like that. Let's go get you washed up. The room I'm staying in is not far at all." Daine merely nodded.
They walked in silence. The only words spoken came when Alanna asked a servant to prepare a bath for Daine and to fetch some clothes from her room. Once she had walked into the sitting area, Alanna asked, "Where's Kit?"
"Tkaa took her," Daine responded distantly.
"You're a wreck. Want to tell me about it?"
"Did you see him? I thought …" she stopped mid-sentence, eyes wide and skin pale.
"You thought he was dead?"
The girl began to sob uncontrollably. "I was too cowardly to help and I let him – why would he do that to himself over and over? Does he want to die? I was so – so glad that he didn't leave me there. I wanted so much to be rescued that I never thought – I never imagined what he would have to do."
Alanna wrapped her arms around the girl and rocked her until the sobs subsided. Internally she chastised herself for every bad thought she had entertained earlier. "Daine, honey, we're at war. Bad things happen during wars. Numair takes chances and pushes the limits of his magic all the time. But he doesn't want to die. He just wanted you all to come home. And he didn't want to destroy some one else's home. That's why he was in the cavern to fix the displacement. He always considers the big picture and he walks the edge of danger. But he's not going to get himself killed if he can help it. In fact I have proof."
Daine wiped her eyes and looked at Alanna searchingly. "What proof?"
"Did you see what was in his hand when Duke Baird was reviving him?" Daine shook her head. "Aquamarines. He realized his essence would be tainted with the foreign magic, so he stored some in the stones before he absorbed the elemental magic. When the Duke saw, he nearly laughed. Until then, we thought he was too far gone to save. But you see? He always intended to survive. He won't leave if he can help it."
Daine looked at Alanna a little hopefully and Alanna kissed the top of her curly head. "Go get cleaned up and I'll take you to him."
She was amazed at how fast Daine scrubbed and dressed. The two women walked to the infirmary together and entered quietly. Numair was still lying on the same pallet, sleeping soundly. Alanna saw Daine slip a small hand into his large one and he opened his eyes groggily and smiled at her. "There you are, Magelet. I missed you." He closed his eyes again and drifted back to sleep. Daine settled in as if she intended to stay for awhile.
Alanna looked up and saw Duke Baird smile at her and wink. He knew somehow and like herself he didn't intend to interfere. Love would lead these two together at some point. Some things are just meant to be and this was one of them.