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Chapter Three
Fandessa knelt in the temple of the goddess and folded her hands, assuming the outward pose of one deep in prayer. Inwardly, however, was a different story. Four years, and still she couldn't form a thought to offer the goddess at times like this. She stayed on her knees, silent and still, until they hurt and she could no longer feel her feet. She then rose and made her way out of the temple and back to her company.
"Hey, Aris!" a voice called to her. She turned to find Jaxon, a fellow guardsman, pushing his way through the crowds towards her. "What do you know?" he asked as he drew near, a huge smile on his face. "The queen has finally delivered! A baby girl it is, named Elspeth!"
Fandessa returned the smile and heaved a sigh of relief. Queen Magra had been in labor for more than two days, and the Healers were beginning to worry. "That's great news, Jax," she replied. "Shall we go down to the Sword and Thistle to celebrate?"
"If we can get there," he said, struggling to find a path through the people. "All of Haven will be out to celebrate tonight—we may have to settle for the first tavern we can find!"
While the Sword and Thistle was the favorite haunt of the Haven Guard, they were in a decent part of the city, and Fandessa knew that any tavern in the local area would be suitable. And knowing the local area, most tavernkeeps would be offering free drinks in honor of the new princess.
"Sounds good to me," Fandessa shouted over the general noise of the crowds. They'd started to gather once word of the queen's impending delivery was made earlier that day. She looked about herself. Even after two years, she still couldn't get used to all the people and noise of the capital city.
She'd fled Langen Keep and signed up with the army at the first station she'd come to. She'd toyed with the idea of offering herself as a temple servant, but knew that there was too much fire in her to ever really enjoy that profession. And besides, her father would certainly have looked there first for her. The army, she knew, would provide her food and shelter and an outlet for all her pent-up anger. And given her love for music and pretty gowns, she'd thrown herself on the hope that it would be the last place Lord Dane would ever look for her. She'd even taken on her sister's name to help ensure that, and so far, as much as she'd been able to determine, Fandessa Langen was officially considered dead by all who knew her.
After her training, she'd done a stint on the border with Karse and one near Lake Evendim before transferring to the Road Guard and being assigned to the streets of Haven.
It had been a difficult choice, leaving the army for the Road Guard, but with the option of being assigned to Haven, she knew it was too tempting an offer to pass up. Still, it was a double-edged sword. On the one hand, she could keep an ear out for news of Lord Dane, and know when he was in the city, thus enabling her to send letters to her mother without fear of his knowing. On the other hand, however, she ran the risk of encountering Sahm.
She hadn't been able to forget him, even after four years. Vague, discreet inquiries had told her that he hadn't Chosen another, and since she'd been assigned to Haven, she hadn't seen his name on the list of Companions who'd gone out on Search. Granted, most Chosen found their way to Haven, but she kept close enough tabs on him to know that he was still unbonded.
She couldn't help but wonder if he still thought of her. Even so, she did her best to stay away from the palace area—which wasn't difficult, since it was such a coveted assignment. If he had been able to find her all the way up at Langen Keep, he could easily have found her at a Road Guard station in Haven. The fact that he hadn't come looking for her told her that her rejection of his Choice had been for all time. He would not come for her again.
"Hey, Jax!" Fandessa called, touching his arm to get his attention. "I've got to stop by the station first!" According to the information her station had just received from the northern gate, her father had recently arrived in Haven for the upcoming celebration for the princess, and Fandessa wanted to send a letter to her mother as soon as possible. There was a Herald scheduled to head north the next morning on a circuit that would take him right to Langen Keep, and Fandessa wanted to see if he would take her letter. It would arrive so much sooner by Companion than by horse.
"Okay!" Jaxon called back. "I'll see you at the Sword!"
Fandessa nodded, and turned down a side street, one that lacked the coveted taverns, and thus, most of the crowds. It didn't take her long to reach her station, and was pleased to find it nearly deserted. She needed a few moments of peace and quiet.
She took her sealed letter out of her beltpouch and approached the captain. "Sir," she said, "I have a request to make."
"Aris?" he asked, looking up from his paperwork. "I thought you'd gone long ago."
"I did, sir," she replied, "but there's something I wanted to ask you."
He laid aside his papers, giving her his full attention. "Of course."
She held out the letter. "If it's possible, I'd like to give this to Herald Karnat before he leaves tomorrow morning on his circuit. It's for a friend up north, and the Herald's circuit takes him straight to her hometown. I've got the first duty shift tomorrow, though—"
The captain dismissed the presented obstacle with a wave of his hand. "No one will be up at that hour, anyway. I'm sure you can be back before anyone even notices you're gone."
Fandessa smiled broadly. "Thank you, sir!" She turned to leave, but his voice prevented her.
"Aris, wait," he said. There's something I wanted to ask you, too." He gestured to a chair. "Pull it up."
Fandessa did as she was bid and then sat down. "What is it?"
The captain leaned back in his chair. "I've just gotten word from the palace that the northern border is in danger of being compromised by the summer raiders. The king is calling up the army to go help the Heralds there, and he also sent word to the Road Guard, asking for anyone with army experience to join them." He sat up and caught Fandessa's eyes. "I know you left the army, Aris, but they could really use your help right now."
Fandessa blinked in surprise, never having thought of returning to the army. But after all it had done for her, how could she refuse?
"Of course," she replied. "When do I leave?"
"Tomorrow afternoon," the captain said. "And thank you. This has been a bad year up there."
"It's my honor," she replied, rising. "I'll see you in the morning, sir."
The captain nodded. "Enjoy yourself tonight, Aris." He sighed heavily and turned his attention back to his paperwork. "One of us should."
With a smile, Fandessa left the station and slowly made her way to the Sword. The army, she thought. Well, it was summer, so it shouldn't be all that bad, and she'd done border stints before, so she knew what to expect.
She patted her beltpouch, feeling the bulge of the letter to her mother. Hopefully, by week's end, it would be in her mother's hands. She tried to write as often as possible to assure her mother that she was still alive and well. She never signed the letters, and made them as vague as possible, never hinting at her profession or her location. And just to be safe, she wrote with the special ink of the Guard, the kind that faded soon after they were opened. It was meant to be used for sensitive messages, but Fandessa had purchased her own bottle. She didn't want to take any chances that Lord Dane might find her, and even instructed her mother to burn the letters once she'd read them. Best to be safe.
Unfortunately, all of this meant that Lady Thena had no way of getting a letter back to her, especially since Fandessa had changed her name—another fact that she hadn't mentioned to her mother. Still, she considered herself fortunate to be able to send letters at all. She made a mental note to add another, short letter to the one she had, telling her mother that she would be unable to write until the end of summer. That should be enough time to deal with the raiders and get back to Haven and find out where Lord Dane was.
Her plans set, Fandessa pressed her way through the crowds, determined to enjoy her last evening in Haven.