'Hey Hawk!' Hawkeye opened his eyes and blinked as the tent came back into focus. Trapper was sitting on his cot with an amused expression on his now clean shaven face.

'What do you want Trapper I'm trying to sleep?' Mumbled Hawkeye before turning over and pulling the covers over his head.

'You just want to have that dream again don't you?'

Hawkeye sat bolt upright, cold fear circulating through his veins. 'How do you know what I was dreaming about Trap?' He asked trying to force the calm into his voice.

'You were mumbling in your sleep so who were you dreaming about?' Trapper smiled devilishly.

'Just a nurse I used to be in practice with.' Lied Hawk quickly but he was avoiding Trapper's eyes.

'What does she look like?' Trapper pressed his friend for details which Hawkeye eagerly supplied, anything to get Trapper off his back.

'She has this gorgeous head of curly blonde hair, eyes so warm they'd keep you cosy all night long and a figure that made you want to fall to the ground and thank God for making it.' Hawkeye was voicing what he thought of Trapper's body but made it sound like he was describing a woman. In truth, the nurse that Hawkeye worked with back home was a 35 year old brunette who was slightly overweight and married with two children.

'She sounds really nice; no wonder you were pissed at me for waking you up.' Trapper got up off Hawkeye's cot and lay down on his own. It could have been his imagination, but Hawk thought that Trapper sounded less than thrilled with his 'dream'. Could it be jealousy? No I'm not that lucky. Thought Hawk bitterly.

There was a knock on the door that made both doctors jump before simultaneously shouting 'Come in!'

Radar entered the Swamp a little apprehensively with the mail bag over his shoulder.

'Morning sirs, I brought you your mail.' Radar produced three envelopes. 'Two for you Captain McIntyre and one for you Captain Pierce.'

'Thanks Radar.' Trapper accepted the envelopes that were offered by the Corporal. Radar turned on his heel and made a very quick exit.

Hawkeye proceeded to open his letter.

Dear Hawkeye,

I regret that I have some sad news for you son. I know this won't be what you want to hear, being over in Korea and all is stressful enough but I felt that you needed to know this. Our dear dog Oscar passed away last night. I know how much you loved him Hawk; he's been in our family for 18 years after all. He's been looking ill for the past few weeks, I thought he was just missing you but apparently it was old age setting in at last. He went peacefully in his sleep and I was right by his side the whole time. I buried him in the backyard; you can say a proper good bye when you get home. I'm sorry to have to give you such terrible news in the mail.

Love Dad

Hawkeye looked up from the letter and willed the tears back. Hawk's father had bought Oscar for him a few weeks after his mother died when he was 10. He had been the most adorable mutt, a mixed breed. Neither Daniel nor Hawkeye could tell exactly what kind of a dog Oscar was. That dog had been Hawkeye's best pal; he always took Oscar for walks and when he was feeling down Oscar could always sense that Hawkeye needed cheering up and would nuzzle his nose into Hawk's palm. Hawkeye was going to miss that dog.

'Awe look Hawk, Kathy drew me a picture of a horse.' Trapper said cheerfully holding up a picture that consisted of a few colourful scribbles.

Hawkeye forced himself to look up and put on a smile. 'That's cute.'

Trapper sensed that something was wrong and went over to his friend. 'What's the matter, bad news from home?'

Hawkeye shook his head but before he could reply the loudspeaker blared across the compound. 'Attention, attention all personnel incoming wounded!'

'Let's go.' The two doctors abandoned their letters and made their way towards pre-op.

'Clamp.' Hawkeye operated with care as he always did but nagging at the back of his head was the death of his favourite companion.

'Clamp.' Margaret handed Hawkeye what he needed and eyed the doctor curiously.

'Are you okay Pierce, you look pale?'

Hawkeye turned to the Head Nurse and sighed. 'I'm fine Margaret it's just that sewing up teenagers isn't what I want to be doing with my life.'

The OR remained unusually silent after that. The staff was usually put at ease by Hawkeye's inappropriate but appreciated quips about the war. Today however he remained silent except when asking for equipment. They only had five casualties to operate on that morning so Hawkeye got out of OR relatively quick. Hawkeye didn't wait for Trapper to finish cleaning himself up. He just trudged out of post-op by himself filled with self pity. Hawk couldn't understand why he could operate on soldiers and not cry if one dies but the death of a dog, a tiny insignificant dog, could make him feel so terrible and empty. Hawk didn't know where he was heading and was quite surprised when he realised he had ended up in front of the supply tent. Hawkeye hesitated before opening the door and going into the cool dark room. Once he was alone Hawkeye let his emotions free. Warm salty tears cascaded down his cheeks as he thought of Oscar, dear Oscar who was Hawk's salvation when his mother passed away. Hawkeye's sobs filled the tent and the heart of a certain someone standing behind him.

'Hey Hawk, you okay?'

Hawkeye jumped a mile and slowly turned around. Trapper was standing next to a supply shelf still wearing his white gown.

'I'm crying, I'm actually crying over a dog.' Hawkeye sniffed. 'There's death and destruction everywhere but I'm crying about the death of a dog.'

Trapper approached his friend slowly. 'Has this got anything to do with the letter you received this morning?'

Hawkeye nodded. 'My dog Oscar died. He was 18; my father bought him for me after my mother died.'

Trapper put his arms around Hawkeye and embraced the younger man. 'Hawk, crying over a family pet doesn't make you a bad person.' Trap whispered and stroked Hawkeye's ebony locks.

'I know but it just feels so wrong.' Hawkeye whispered he felt so safe in Trapper's embrace. He could smell the older man's aftershave which was mixed with sweat and gun powder.

'It's okay Hawk, I'm always here.'

Hawkeye looked up into Trapper's warm brown eyes which bore into his own blue ones. Slowly the two men got closer and before Hawkeye could register what was going on, they were kissing. It started off tentative and slow but gradually they got braver and the kiss deepened. Tongues began to explore mouths and hands wandered to regions that were normally off limits except in the showers. However it was as though both men came to their senses at the same time and they pulled away from each other. Trapper stared at Hawkeye as though this was the first time he had ever laid eyes on the young doctor.

'What are we doing?' Trapper whispered stepping away from Hawkeye.

'Hey Trap, I know this may not be the best time to tell you this but…' Hawkeye reached out to put a hand on Trapper's shoulder but to his dismay, he stepped backwards.

Trapper shook his head and silenced Hawkeye, 'Hawk, I can't deal with this, you're upset and very vulnerable right now. We are going to walk outside like nothing ever happened. Agreed?'

Hawkeye could almost hear his heart breaking in two at these harsh words. He realised now that he loved Trapper more than anything else in the world but that love, or at least the love that Hawk wanted, would not be returned. With a great effort Hawkeye nodded and mumbled, 'Agreed, I'm sorry Trap.'

Trapper nodded gruffly and left Hawkeye in the supply tent extremely upset and dumbfounded.

TBC...