A/N: I took a break from finals to whip this up. I was on the edge of my seat, really not knowing where I was going until I got there. I still have one Statistics take home final and then I am free from school for 29 days. Just working full time is going to feel like a vacation. Thanks for your words of encouragement. They mean a great deal to me.

Sheila

Heart Cancer

Chapter 13

The man frowned over the films for a few minutes, moving them to view at different angles. Chase caught himself holding his breath. Cameron moved toward, but Foreman put a hand on her arm and shook his head slightly. She folded her arms in frustration and leaned against the counter.

The man looked up and made a face, "I don't know."

Foreman took in a deep breath, attempting to keep his composure. "We've been over this, Ben. It's pretty clear cut. A risk? Yes, but that's why we came to the best."

The surgeon looked around the room, his eyes not meeting anyone's. "I just don't know. One minute I see it and then I don't."

Chase's head dropped back, and he stared at the ceiling, his mouth open. Cameron imagined him willing himself to stay calm.

"Cuddy said you'd have no liability. We'll cover you completely."

Cameron heard a distinctive shuffle, and saw House slip into the room, dropping into the nearest chair. Exhaustion was deeply etched into his features.

"I am cleared of all liability up front plus everyone signs a confidentiality agreement if this bombs." The surgeon eyed Foreman warily.

"Agreed."

The man slapped the films on the table. "I'll do it."

Everyone seemed to relax where they stood with the exception of House. He turned his head slowly to the surgeon, his eyes burning, and said, "No."

He cocked his head, "Excuse me. What are you saying no to? I just agreed to do the surgery."

House worried his lower lip while he stared at the surgeon. "You're not getting liability and you are not getting confidentiality. If you screw this up, I will scream it from the highest rooftop."

"House!" Chase shouted.

"I mean it. You're going to do this surgery as if your life depended on it. Hell, who knows? Maybe it does."

The surgeon looked around for his coat. "I don't have to listen to this."

"Please. Wait!" Foreman took him by the arm. "Let's sit down and talk about this."

The man calmed some, and was coaxed into a chair. He looked at House, and was met with the older man's electric glare. House leaned in. "No free passes. Do the surgery the way it should be done."

The surgeon shook his head and chuckled. "Why am I being lectured to by a diagnostician?"

"Because as a rule, surgeons are an insufferable bunch, and I wouldn't give ten cents for the best one in this hospital right now. But Dr. Wilson needs one, and the last thing he's getting is some prima donna who won't get his hands dirty."

"Hey, it's your call." The man grabbed his coat and threw it over his shoulder. "I can just go back to Mount Sinai and try and salvage the rest of my day."

"Aw geez, Ben. Come on. I told you about House. He's like this." Foreman said, trying to head him off.

"Knock it off, Foreman. The man has a job to go back to." House leaned back, his arms folded, and he became interested in picking at a piece of dried food on his shirt sleeve.

Before the surgeon got out of the room, House cleared his head and spoke, "Before you go, I want you to know that I see you for what you are."

His back stiffened and he turned.

House smirked. "Wilson's not getting second best. So come to the table prepared to risk everything or don't come at all. Just know that I see you."

He shook his head. "What in God's name do you mean?'

House sighed. "You're afraid to take a risk, really put your heart into this case. It's game day, and you come here acting like a plate of lukewarm leftovers. So I see you. And I won't forget this. When it got tough, when you were faced with the big case, you choked. It's good for us to know, and it's good for you to know as well."

"You're telling me I have no nerve?" The man stepped forward as if to threaten House.

Not moving an inch, House looked at him and nodded slowly, "Yeah."

"I'm outta here." He brushed past Chase who got up to stop him and then realized that there was nothing he could really do. The man pushed past him.

"One more thing," the man stopped at the door and turned to hear House have the last word. "I will always remember that you walked out on an opportunity to save a good man because you were afraid to test yourself. I will always know that, and you will know that I know that."

The man took a deep breath as if to speak, and then shook his head before disappearing out the door.

Cameron hit him in the shoulder in frustration. "What's wrong with you!"

House grimaced and rubbed his shoulder. "I'm not at all opposed to our relationship moving in this direction, but let's at least work out a safe word."

She moaned in frustration, and stalked off to the other end of the room. Foreman narrowed his eyes at House. "I thought Wilson was your friend." Without waiting for a response, he shook his head and left the room.

Chase took Cameron by the elbow and steered her out the door in front of him, leaving House alone. House waited until he knew they were gone, then he stabbed his cane into the floor, cursing loudly.

……………………………………………………………………………

Wilson couldn't separate one voice from another. Cameron, Chase, and Foreman were talking on top on one another at Cuddy who had come in for one last visit before they prepped. Cuddy shouted them down until she could make sense of it all. She pointed at Foreman, and let him tell the sad tale. As he was finishing, House came in quietly. He winced at the spectacle, found a chair in the corner, and slumped into it darkly.

Foreman finished and Cuddy turned to him, her mouth hanging open. She seemed unable to form words. She advanced on him, and he winced in anticipation of another physical assault from one of the women in his life. She stopped short and hissed at him, "If anything happens to him, I will never let you step foot in this hospital again. I don't care what you can do. Do you understand me?"

House blinked, but didn't even try to defend himself. He just sat there like a petulant child, unable to meet her eyes. A gloomy silence descended as they all stared at House. Then, with some effort, Wilson sat up, "Hey, everybody, let's all just relax a little."

Heads turned in his direction. He managed a grin. "Come on. If anyone should be pissed, it should be me."

Cameron shook her head. "Don't you understand what he did to you?'

Wilson gestured with his head at House. "Let's give him a chance to explain."

House craned his neck around Cuddy's angry form, and gave his friend a grateful nod.

Wilson's eyebrows shot up. "So! Explain already! You're the one that talked me into this damn thing in the first place."

Cuddy moved aside and all of them stood, arms folded, watching him. House took a deep breath. "It wasn't right."

Chase threw his arms up in the air. "Beautiful. I know I'm clear now."

House rolled his eyes, and Wilson looked away.

House looked at Cuddy. "You were serving Wilson up on a platter. No liability? A confidentiality agreement? This is experimental, and we gotta drag the guy into it. You can't convince me that he was going to put his heart into it."

"Who was trying to convince you? This was not about you." Foreman barked at him.

House leaned forward, his eyes shooting. "This is about Wilson, and I'm not going to let that idiot come in here with nothing at stake, and take a stab it."

"We can get him back," Cuddy listened and shook her head. "Give me his cell phone number. I'll talk to him."

"No."

She turned to find Wilson, his face gaunt with weight loss and pain. "I trust him. If House says this guy isn't right, then he isn't right."

"James," Cuddy began.

"No. I don't have control over much right now, but I have control over this. If House says it's not going to work, then I don't want him." Wilson turned to Foreman. "You have to find me someone else."

"Don't worry. He's still here." House whispered.

"How do you know?" Chase asked.

"Just call him. He's a surgeon. They're all competitive idiots. He is not going to let me get the last word."

Wilson screwed up his face. "Hold up. You just said he's not the right one."

House cocked his head. "He wasn't the right one when he didn't have something to prove."

Foreman blinked at him for a moment, and then began punching numbers into his phone. In a couple of seconds, he reached a voice so loud he had to pull the phone away from his ear. He pulled the phone back in as he headed for the door. "It's okay. Listen. No, I'll meet you in the cafeteria. Yes, he's definitely an ass. You want to sue? Great idea. I can promise you three good witnesses." His voice faded as he ran down the hall.

House looked at Cuddy, Cameron, and Chase. "Why are you standing here? He needs an ego massage and he doesn't need to see me again. Just don't give away the store."

Cuddy turned and headed for the door, Chase and Cameron trailing after her.

Wilson slid back down onto his pillow. "Jesus, House, what are you doing to me?"

"You always said I was nothing but trouble."

Wilson smiled. "So you owe me already. Get it right. Okay?'

House nodded and got up to leave. Wilson turned in his bed. "Greg, in case I don't…I thought..."

"Don't," House shook his head softly.

"I don't miss my brother when I'm with you." Wilson grasped his hand and squeezed. House stood there silently, blinking hard, his eyes growing soft and red.

Wilson nodded and swallowed hard. Then he took a breath and said, "You're such a faker. Get out of here so I can get a few minutes of rest before they shave my head." He let go of House and turned his head to the wall. House stared at him for a moment, unable to speak. Then he dropped his head and left the room.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

The first half of the surgery went smoothly. House fussed at Foreman all the way to the door to the operating room. Foreman slipped in the door as quickly as possible. He was going to observe the surgery, and keep the surgeon focused.

They gathered in the theatre to observe the surgery. Cuddy compulsively chewed on her lip. Chase paced until House tripped him with his cane. He stumbled into a chair and stayed there. Cameron stood at the window like a kid at a toy store, her eyes never leaving the action. House stood next to her, leaning on his cane, the pain in his leg shooting up into his stomach. He didn't think to reach for a Vicodin.

Chase and Cameron left before the surgery hit the halfway mark. They were going to have to stabilize him, and get him ready for the second half of the surgery. House let them go. He was only going to get in the way, and he didn't think he could handle seeing an unconscious Wilson.

When the break finally came, House pushed away from the glass without a word to Cuddy and headed for the door. It was 2 a.m. and the hallways were empty. He thought about heading to his office, but there was an office next to it that he couldn't bear to pass. Slowly, he wandered into a waiting room. He headed for a couch along the wall, and dropped into it. He would close his eyes for a few minutes, and then go back to the theatre. He was starting to settle when he heard a voice.

"I know you're exhausted, but please tell me something before you rest."

His eyes popped open, and he saw her sitting in a chair opposite of him. She wore a scarf on her head, and her skin looked very pale. She was thin and tired, but the intensity of her dark eyes was not lost on him.

He sat up slowly. "I thought you were going to stay with your mother in San Juan."

She shrugged. "I had to stay and make sure that he was all right. He did so much for me."

House nodded. "It's a nice gesture, but you should go, be where your family needs you. You don't have much time."

She clasped her hands together tightly. "I just want to see him make it."

"Let me tell you a story," House began. "Wilson told me about this. Happened a few years ago. A woman came in with breast cancer. We'll call her…Kathy. She needed a complete mastectomy. She was young, and she got really depressed. Wilson was worried that she wouldn't survive. He had a brainstorm and put her in chemo with another woman named Stella. Now Stella was an old veteran of tumors. Hers had grown back three times. There was no doubt it was going to get her, but she was going to go down fighting. So Kathy started doing chemo next to Stella, and of course, Stella charmed her, and within a month, Kathy was looking at her cancer in a whole new way. She got very attached to Stella, and started driving here and home. After a few months, Stella got a bad report. Her tumor had metastasized everywhere. She only had about a month. Well, Stella was sad, but she knew the odds and had been preparing for this for somewhere around five years. Kathy really struggled. She stopped going in for treatment. Instead, she hung around with Stella. Stella talked to her. Wilson talked to her, but she was really depressed. When Stella died, Kathy stopped taking care of herself which is not good for a woman with no active immune system. She got pneumomia and then complications. She died six months later."

Conni looked down at the carpet for a long time. "You think that Wilson won't get better as long as I'm here."

House sighed. "I think Wilson didn't have a reason to go to Hawaii until you came into his life. And I do not think it's going to help his recovery if he watches you dying in front of him. I think the guilt of surviving is a very powerful thing."

She nodded, still unable to look at him.

"We'll take care of him. It's time for you to go and let your family take care of you."

Finally she looked up at him. "Let me get you some coffee. Maybe a yogurt?"

He frowned at her.

"A candy bar?" she ventured.

"Now you're talking. Can you shake me in an hour?"

He settled back onto the couch and watched her walk out of the room. The weight of her sadness descended on him, and he wondered if he should have told her how intimately he was feeling survivor's guilt this very minute.

…………………………………………………………………………………….

Chase and Cameron came back into the theatre a few minutes after the second part of the surgery began. They both looked like hell, and he dreaded asking them how it went. It was enough to know that he had a pulse and was back on the table. Cuddy dragged a chair in and pushed it under him without a word. He dropped into it, but his eyes never left his best friend.

The surgery was getting dicey, and the anesthesiologist was making noises about dropping blood pressure. The surgeon wanted to stop, but Foreman went face to face with him for a few minutes, and sent him back at Wilson.

House started murmuring encouragement under his breath like he was at a little league game. Cameron came up behind and put her hands on his shoulder, and didn't move them when he tried to shrug them off. Instead she held on, gently massaging the back of his neck, and whispering positive thoughts.

Half an hour later, the surgeon was closing. Wilson had hung on, but his vitals stunk, and it was clear that the next 24 hours was going to make or break the success of the surgery.

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TBC