Disclaimer: I do not receive any profit for my fanfictions, nor do I own Supernatural or Sam and Dean Winchester... I want them! Grabs Sam and Dean and runs off laughing like a maniac.

Title: Thoughtless Memories

Chapter Title: Chapter Six: Memories

Set After: Asylum

Summary: Dean thought Sam hated him. What better way to say 'I love you' like rock salt in the chest, right? He thought he couldn't feel any worse pain than he had when his brother spat those words at him, then shot him... But one day Sam was attacked while Dean went out for coffee... And he found something worse than that pain. "Sam? You okay?" "Um... Do I know you?" Now Dean's fighting to save his only brother... and his memories... But will he make it in time?

Warnings: Fluff... major fluff... And Dean crying! x.x

"A girl?" Dean asked, furrowing his brow. "Who?"

"Her name was Jess," John said, looking over at Sam for a moment before looking back to Dean.

Dean shook his head. "No, Dad, that's not possible. Jess was Sam's girlfriend. She died. I saw her die the way Mom died. It couldn't have been her."

"It was," John said, shrugging. "And she seemed perfectly alive to me."

"Hey, guys," Jess said, walking down the hallway. "Dropped a few things off in one of the guest rooms. Don't mind if I steal Sam from you do you, Dean?" She smiled.

Dean turned to Jess. "Me, you, kitchen now."

"What's up?" Jess asked as they sat down next to the kitchen table. "You know, Dean, it's probably not smart to leave Sam alone in a strange house at a time like this."

"Kyle's with him. Don't change the subject." Dean narrowed his eyes at Jessica. "Why are you back? How are you back?"

Jess sighed, looking down at the table for a moment. I'm here to protect Sam, Jessica thought. But, no, she couldn't tell Dean. Not yet. He'd freak out. Majorly. Jess looked up at Dean and nodded. "Fine. I was brought back. To help Sam at this time."

"Why? Who brought you back?" Dean asked. He didn't know if he could trust her... but he'd have to... in order for Sam to trust him. Because Sam loved Jessica, and he could remember her at the moment, not him. Damn, the irony.

"I'm sorry, Dean, that's all I can tell you," Jess said, standing up. "Just know that if Sam dies his soul will be in the hands of the Devil. And I want to keep that from happening." She walked back into the living room, leaving Dean to think about what she had just said.

Dean pulled off his shirt and sat down on his bed, sighing. Well, it was a good thing Jessica brought some memories back, right? That proved that she could help. But there was just something about her that didn't feel right... Like she had been brought back for all the wrong reasons. Dean stood up. No, Sam couldn't stay with her. He'd be damned if he let her do something to him.

Dean opened his door and walked down the dark hall, only to run into something.

"Ow. Dean?" Sam asked, backing up a bit.

"Yeah," Dean said, rubbing his head where it had come into contact with Sam's. "Wait a minute. You spent all day with Jess. She told you who I am?"

"No," Sam said, walking over to Dean's door and opening it. Dean followed his brother and watched as he sat down in the bed he had occupied before. "I remember a lot. Jess... she gave me something. Said I wouldn't forget in the morning, either."

Dean nodded, sitting down on his own bed. "Good."

"Dean, I'm sorry about what I said... I'm sorry for pointing a gun at you and I'm sorry for leaving and threatening you when all you were trying to do was tell it to me straight and look out for me," Sam said, looking over at his brother, who seemed to be refusing to look at Sam.

Dean nodded, taking off his socks. "It's fine, Sam. I understand."

"No, Dean --"

"Yes, it is," Dean said, looking over at his brother. "Sam, it's not your fault you didn't remember anything. Hell, if it had been me I would've been freaking out, too. So, really, Sam, it's fine. Don't dwell on it."

"Well, back at the asylum --"

Dean rolled his eyes. "Hey, Sam, when that shapeshifter turned into me back in your friend Rebecca's town... it said some pretty bad stuff to you. I acted like I didn't hear it, but I did. And it was all true. So, you know what? It told you plain and simple what I was thinking, so it's only fair that you told me plain and simple what you were thinking. We're even now."

Sam nodded slightly. "Dean, I'm sorry that I left."

"Sam, I already told you. You didn't remember, so --"

"No... When I left for college," Sam said, looking down at the floor. "I'm sorry that I left you. You were always there, no matter what. And you promised me that you always would be... And you were. But I... I abandoned you. And I'm sorry."

Dean sighed slightly. He walked over to Sam's bed and sat down next to him. "Geez, man, what's with the increase of Chick Flick moments?"

Sam smiled slightly, looking over at his brother. "I remember, right after the creature attacked, when I asked you who you were. I remember your eyes, Dean. I remember the heart break... I remember seeing you soul shattered into a million pieces... I guess I'm just trying to make up for it."

Dean sighed, nodding. "Well, it's over now. You remember. Now all we have to do is figure out how the hell we're going to save you from dying." He stood up and just stood there for a moment. He was silent, then Sam heard a small sniffle. Something he had never heard from his brother before.

"Dean?" Sam asked quietly, standing up. He put a hand on his brother's shoulder.

Dean turned around, a there were a few tears on his face. "Sammy, it did hurt. You not knowing me... you pointing that gun at me... me having to convince you who you were and who I was and that you could trust me... But what hurt worst of all was when you left last night... I searched for you for hours... but I couldn't find you. And I was just so scared. You couldn't remember anything, you couldn't defend yourself, and something was obviously hunting you... Sammy, I actually prayed last night. I prayed that nothing would happen to you, and you'd return to me safe and sound... And now you're back, and you have the woman you love, and you're so happy, and that makes me really happy..."

"But?" Sam asked, raising his eyebrows. He was watching his brother break down in front of him, and all he could do was listen. It broke his heart.

"But I don't know how to save you. I don't know what to do," Dean said, looking away from Sam as more tears fell. He walked over to the other side of the room, shaking his head. "I researched and researched... and I couldn't find anything... Nothing. And your headaches have already started... Which means you're gonna die soon. And I can't do anything to stop it. And it scares me. I'm scared because I have no control over it, and I'm gonna lose you... I lost you before, but I knew we'd talk again. I wasn't worried about that, Sam... But this time... it'll be so.. so final. I won't see you again. And if you die, if you leave me, I don't think I'll be able to go on anymore."

Sam swallowed back a lump that had formed in his throat. He walked over to his brother and turned him around, hugging him tightly.

Dean sniffled again, hugging Sam back. "Don't leave me, Sammy. Please. I've got no one else."

"I'm not gonna leave you, Dean. I promise. I'd never do that... Never again. You're stuck with me," Sam said, smiling slightly.

Dean laughed slightly and pulled away from Sam. "God, look at me, crying like a little girl."

"Dean?" Sam asked, sitting back down on his bed.

"Yeah?" Dean asked, drying his face with the back of his hand.

"I love you." Sam smiled at his brother slightly before laying back on the bed.

"You too," Dean said, sitting down on his own bed. He smiled slightly, then shook his head. "I love you too."

Sam looked over at Dean, a little shocked. Wow, Dean never said those four words. It was always like what he had said: 'you too.' What an... odd... change. Nice, but odd.

Sam awoke the next morning, looking around. He sat up, and smiled slightly when he noticed Dean still asleep, snoring. He remembered the dream he had had... Well, the memory.

"Jessica!" Sam yelled, staring up at the burning body of his girlfriend.

"Sam?" Dean yelled, running into the room. His eyes went wide as it fell on Jessica on the ceiling. He looked down at this brother, trying to shield his eyes from the flames, still yelling for his girlfriend. "Sam!" Dean ran over to his brother and grabbed him, pulling him out the door. He continued yelling her name, and struggled against Dean as he pulled him out of the room.

"No!" Sam yelled as they started through the living room. "No, Dean, we have to go back for her!"

"We can't!" Dean yelled back, pulling Sam through the doorway. He had kicked open the door to get in the house before.

Dean dragged Sam out next to the car, the tears already streaming down Sam's face.

"No! Jessica!" Sam yelled, starting to stand up.

"No, Sam, no!" Dean yelled, pushing him back down. "No."

"But I have to go get her..." Sam whispered, looking at his brother.

Dean shook his head. "You can't, Sam... I'm sorry."

Sam put his head in his hands, a sob escaping his lips.

Dean looked at Sam with sad eyes. He had seen Sam break down before, yes, but that was when they were kids. Sam had grown stronger since then. A lot stronger. Dean couldn't remember ever seeing Sam cry, except for the night he left to go to college...

Dean pulled his brother close, rubbing his back. "Shhh..."

"Jess..." Sam whispered.

"We'll avenge her, Sammy... I promise." Dean whispered, pulling his brother even closer. He closed his eyes tightly. "I promise."

Dean turned around and looked at Sam, yawning widely. "Dude, why are you staring at me?"

Sam smiled slightly. "I remembered something last night... And I know I never told you... but thanks."

"For what?" Dean asked, sitting up in his bed.

"For pulling me out of the fire the night Jessica died... For not letting me go back in."

"You just remembered that last night?" Dean asked, looking a bit worried.

"Don't worry, I remembered Jess dying yesterday... I relived the pain, but I'm alright now," Sam said, nodding. "Jess told me to think about all the good times we had together... And it helped. A lot. Anyway, I just remember what happened after the flames last night. So, thanks."

"Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Enough Chick Flick moments. We had enough of those last night," Dean said, groaning as he fell back on his pillow.

Sam smiled and laid back down. "Sure."

"Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"I wasn't gonna let you die. You're my only brother. And I love you. No matter what anyone says. Even myself."

Sam smiled slightly, nodding. "I love you too. No matter what I shoot at you."

"Oh, yeah, real funny," Dean said, mocking a laugh. He grabbed a pillow and threw it at Sam, who laughed, throwing it back, hitting Dean in the head.

Dean sat up quickly, looking over at Sam. "Oh, no you didn't." He grabbed a pillow just as Sam laughed and jumped out of bed. Dean then chased Sam out of the room and down the hall, hitting him a few times with the pillow as he did.

Dean: I'm gonna hurt you.

Haley: Why?

Dean: Do you even know how many Chick Flick moments I can count in that?

Haley: Eh... Well, uh... You were scared! Your brother is dying! I think even you are entitled to a few 'Chick Flick moments.' You just won't admit it.

Dean: Yeah, whatever. Women...