Secretary Interview #1
The brunette sat in the chair uncomfortably, fidgeting constantly. She was nervous. Her first interview and it was with a full colonel in the military. Just her luck.

"I'm just going to ask you a few questions," Roy said, sitting across from her, clipboard in hand. Hawkeye stood behind him. "Nothing to worry about," And he flashed a smile. She blushed and looked away. Roy wasn't surprised; he had that kind of an effect on women.

Hawkeye felt an odd anger boiling up inside watching the colonel flirt with the girl. She didn't know why. Was she jealous? No! Of course not! No! Definitely not! Roy can flirt with who ever he wants, he's just her superior. That's it. That's it! A voice in the back of her head shouted. Or is it? Another asked in defiance. She shut both voices out and returned to the interview.

"Your name is Megumi Kana?"

"Yes, sir." She replied shyly.

"Any experience?"

"A little," She said quietly, "I worked as a part time clerk in my father's store." Roy nodded and made a note of it on his clipboard.

"Are you prepared to tackle excessive amounts of paperwork," He paused, looking up from his clipboard and stared at her, "Every single day?"

She didn't know how to respond. She didn't want to be murdered by paperwork, but she wanted a job, but the paperwork. He's making it sound so horribly painful. Hawkeye who had always been a patient person found herself unable to stand the slowness of the girl's response, pulled her pistol from the holster and aimed it point blank in between the frightened girl's eyes.

"Answer the question." She said slowly.

"Hawkeye," Roy tried to interject, "This isn't the Spanish Inquisition. No need for hostilities."

Suddenly realizing that the girl was quivering with fear and on the verge of tears Riza retracted her pistol. "Sorry, sir."

Before Roy had a chance to say anything else, the girl grabbed her things and raced out of the door, leaving Roy slightly confused and dumbfounded and Riza in a better mood.

Secretary Interviews #2
"So, Miss, uh," Roy checked the name written on the form, Antoinette Baumgartner. Antoinette….Baumgartner? How the hell do you pronounce that? He looked to Hawkeye standing next to him who shook her head and gave him a you're-on-your-own look. "Uh, miss…uh…"

"Antoinette Baumgartner." The pretty blonde sitting across from his said with a smile. This was perhaps the most exciting day of her life. She was sitting across the Flame Alchemist, Roy Mustang, in an interview to be his secretary. She was going to faint.

"Miss Antonio Bamgardner." He repeated with an apologetic smile unaware of the fact that he had mispronounced her name. Hawkeye shook her head with a sigh and decided it was best if she didn't tell him. Some things are left better unsaid.

"Do you have any previous experience as a secretary?"

"No," The blonde shook her head, sending his gorgeous locks flying. Roy decided that he liked this Antonio Bamgardner, she was blonde, good body, nice smile, miniskirt, seems to like him a lot too, so who cares if she doesn't have any experience? He looked at Hawkeye for approval and received an angry glare.

Feeling as if his life was at stake, Roy calmly told the blonde that she would need experience and that it was a pleasure meeting her. She sat there for a while, unsure of what had just happened. Her dreams were crushed, rejected, by Roy Mustang. And unashamed she began weeping. This sent Roy into panic.

"Uh, Miss Bamgardner, don't cry, please, don't take it personally." He said in effort to comfort her. There was a weeping woman in his office and he wasn't sure what he should. And then an idea popped into his mind. If she can't be his secretary, how about being his girlfriend? Like he said before, blonde, nice smile, miniskirt, perfect. "If it makes you feel any better, how would you like to have dinner with me tonight?"

The girl forgot all about crying and with uncontained excitement and enthusiasm replied, "Yes! I would love to! Why that would be just delightful!"

And Riza swore, if she didn't know any better, she would have shot both of them on the spot.