Chapter 4

Before I Knew

By Poet

XXXXX

Most of Hermione's strength had returned by the time she and Severus had reached the path leading to the school gates. Teeth clenched in anger, she had not spoken a word to the quiet Potions Master since their departure from Number 12 Grimauld Place. She could sense his annoyance as he strode beside her. 'Well, bollocks to him. All I'm going to hear is more about how grateful I should be. Well, I am. But it isn't like he'd accept it graciously. No! He'll drag me through the dirt for his own bloody pleasure.' She snorted in disgust and he turned to look at her. Meeting his darkened gaze with her own impertinent glare Hermione saw anger flash in the man's eyes. Suddenly guilt tried to press forward, shaming her for being angry at the man who had saved her twice. But the fact that she had indeed needed saving, and that it had come from this man frustrated her. It was wonder if he couldn't sense it. Her hopes were dashed when he turned, and snarling at her halted her with a firm grip on her arm.

"Ever hear of a little thing called gratitude Ms. Granger? Or has your brain been so addled by all the attentions of young Mr. Weasely that you simply haven't the time for common courtesy?" Wrenching her arm from his grasp Hermione turned on him.

"Excuse me? Attentions from Mr. Weasely? What the hell are you implying!" His icy tone cut her off.

"Mind your tongue. You forget your place."

"Perhaps I do, Professor," she bit out sarcastically. "But how do you warrant any courtesy when you treat me like filth with your implications that I would ever invite any sort of behavior from Ronald Weasely?" Incensed, her anger overrode her normal sense of self preservation. She was tired and she was sore and in no mood for the Potion Master's 'bastard' act. Ready to fully launch into a tirade fueled by years of torment at his hands she stopped abruptly when the look on his face changed. No longer angry, he looked rather appalled.

"I have never regarded you with anything other than the highest opinion Ms. Granger. You would do well to realize that at times it was not prudent to shower praise upon you as all of your peers and teachers did in their disgusting displays of flattery, but I have never for one minute, acted with the belief that you were worth anything but the highest regard!" He was shouting now. As angry as she and glad for the opportunity to finally express his frustrations. Continuing he sneered, "You and Potter and Weasely bemoaned my treatment of you to anyone who would listen. And beyond that, I daresay there wasn't a year that one part of your group didn't accuse me of being a bloody traitor! I gave up everything I had to keep you and your precious friends alive! I would have given my life, if only to spare the one possibility that the Dark Lord could be defeated. It never came to that but, I don't recall being thanked for any of my services when the dust settled. No, I was merely exonerated quietly of all charges brought by the Wizengamot and then pushed back into the shadows. Pushed here, to once again deal with insolent students and treatment from the likes of you. And now, I find myself thankless again for saving your life."His breath came in sharp pants as he finished. As the anger left him, fatigue settled and he waited for Hermione to send some biting retort back at him. What came surprised him.

"I...I'm sorry Professor." It was hard to tell in the moonlight but it looked as if tears were threatening. Exhaling sharply Severus did not wait for the opportunity. Dropping his hand from her arm he turned and stalked up the path towards the school in the distance. Hermione followed wordlessly after a moments hesitation. Cursing the distance between them and the safety of the stone halls, Severus's pace was brutally fast. They entered the castle some minutes later and without a word he parted from her in search of the solitude his dungeons would guarantee. Hermione watched the back of the retreating man, clad always in sweeping black fabric. Sighing, she turned down the nearest corridor in search of her own rooms.

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Hurling a glass vial at the nearest wall, Severus paced an angry path across his dungeons. Once again he was disgusted that the girl had gotten to him so severely. 'Damn her!' Grimacing fiercely he stepped to his desk and in one motion swept it's content clear. Notes painstakingly organized, fluttered in disarray to the cold floor. Samples of potions brewed after many hours spread when their vials broke. Some of them smoked and scorched the stone. The destruction irritated him all the more, knowing full well he'd just have to clean it up in the morning. Stalking to a nearby cabinet, the door was practically torn from the hinges as he opened it. His eyes raked the shelves but to no avail. Searching the next one, he realized that his last batch of calming draught had expired, unused in the infirmary at the end of term. Cursing softly, Severus went into his storeroom, gathering various ingredients and carrying them into his private lab. In minutes he had the base of the potion simmering and took the time to dice several ingredients that would be added. Once everything was mixed properly he still had over twenty minutes to wait for the potion to be complete.

Snorting in disgust the man wandered away, and into his bedchambers. Much like his home, books lined every available space on the walls. Volumes upon volumes on potions and antidotes. Some on theory, ideas about future uses. His own notations took an entire shelf full of parchments with his own creations carefully written in each one. Hours had been spent in his research before everything had been thrown into chaos. The Dark Lord had risen, calling back all of his faithful servants. And Severus indeed, had been one of the most faithful. A deception carried so well that several members of the Order had tried to kill him in the final confrontation. Only Dumbledore had spoken to clear his name. 'And the old fool even tried to convince me there were others. Where were they when I was attacked by the people who I was supposed to be able to trust?'

The sound of the outer door opening slowly drew his attention quite suddenly. With so few people inhabiting the castle, Severus was suspicious as to the identity of the trespasser. Dumbledore, if not mistake, was away on some errand. His was usually the only willing presence in the cold dungeons. Withdrawing his wand from his robes, Severus crept through his chamber door and slipped into the shadows of dimly lit lab. A figure took several shuffled step, treading over broken glass and several pieces of paper. He saw the head of whomever it was turn away from his hiding spot and took the moment to round on the intruder. With three silent steps he had his wand leveled squarely at the back of the unknown person.

"Take another step and I will curse you."The person jumped, frightened by the unseen approach. Severus nearly let loose a spell when the person identified themselves by speaking.

"Professor?"

"Ms. Granger! If you are here to engage me in one of you idiotic verbal battles then forget it. I have neither the energy nor the inclination to listen while you attempt to set some pointless plea for guilt before me. Get out."

"No."

"No?" He sounded incredulous."You have pushed me to the very edge and yet you flout some notion of Gryffindor insolence? To me?"

"What are you going to do Professor? Curse me? Hex me into oblivion? Or perhaps poison me with one of your potions?" Now Hermione turned, glaring angrily up at Severus. Barely six inches apart the tension flared. Neither was willing to back down from the contest they had engaged in.

"Why you..." he didn't finish before she held her hand up.

"Severus." She spoke softly, hoping to calm the rage that practically emanated from the man. "I didn't come here to fight with you again. I wanted to apologize. Sincerely apologize. I acted horribly to you, both tonight and this morning. I know you probably don't believe it and I cannot blame you. But I am well and truly sorry. And very grateful that you saved me from Ron." Averting her gaze for a moment, Hermione took in the damage spread about the room. Looking quickly back up at Snape she offered him a pained expression. "I never meant what I said. And maybe you were right. Perhaps somehow I made Ron think...well. Maybe you were right. I'm sorry to have angered you after everything you did." If she expected any reaction from him, she didn't receive one. Instead his gaze softened somewhat and the anger left his features.

Hermione turned from him and bent before his desk to start collecting together some of the clutter left on the floor from Severus's fury. He gazed at her a moment before scowling.

"What are you doing?"

"Cleaning up this mess. Or were you just going to leave it?" She still couldn't help the slight sarcasm present in her voice. Then, she felt the soft tug of his hand upon her shoulder trying to draw her up.

"It wont do to be foolish. Several potions have spilt and I wont waste the effort to make an antidote for your carelessness." Try as he might, Severus couldn't quite affect haughtiness as he flicked his wand towards the scorched stone. "Scourgify." The sickly black marks on the floor disappeared, leaving gray and shards of glass.

"Will you be able to repair the vials?" Hermione's voice was startlingly close behind him. Turning, he found the woman leaning around him to see. She straightened when he scowled at her. Letting loose a shallow breath, Snape shook his head.

"No. The damage is too much. Better just to destroy the remains and start anew I think. Unfortunately, this is going to have to be done without magic. Those vials were protected from tampering but a side effect of the spells makes them impervious the weaker cleaning types." He pointed his hand to the door of his storeroom and whispered "Accio."Two brooms and a dustpan flew to his outstretched hand and with a smirk he turned to Hermione. "You wish to be helpful, then I suggest you start over there." Unceremoniously he thrust the broom into her hands and motioned to the far corner of the room. Without protest Hermione moved off and began to sweep.

It had taken ten minutes for all the glass and other odd pieces of debris to be swept into the center of the room. A pile, deceptively large for the size of the many vials broken, lay as evidence of their combined efforts. Now Severus stooped to gather the garbage into his dustpan while Hermione put away her broom. Reaching, he picked up a larger shard of glass only to be rewarded by a deep slice down his thumb and partway across the palm of his hand. Hissing in surprise he threw the pan down and stood. Blood had already pooled and fallen out from the palm of his hand while he searched for something to staunch the flow.

"Damn." He cursed angrily as a bit of the cloth he was using for a bandage snagged on part of the torn skin, sending a jolt of pain through his arm.

"What's the matter?" The voice he wished to hear the very least had sounded once again uncomfortably close behind him.

"Nothing. Leave me be." Hermione paid no attention and stepped around him to see red staining the cloth covering his hand.

"And you call me foolish?" He scowled at her but the sarcasm was absent from her voice. Without reservation she took his wounded hand in her own and lifted the bandage. When she grimaced Severus pulled himself from her grasp.

"I believe I can tend to my own injuries Ms. Granger." He reached for his wand and muttered several quiet spells. When the bleeding didn't halt he practically gaped at the idea that his own body wouldn't listen to his orders. Hermione's soft laugh made his anger rise again and he turned his glare on her again. "I'm so glad you find this amusing Ms. Granger. But if you are quite done I believe you've done enough for the night. Good Evening." She didn't move.

"Professor. Severus." He glared when she dared use his name. "You said it yourself. Perhaps the imperviousness to spells has passed to your wound from the glass. If the vials can't be affected by weak cleaning spells then maybe your wound isn't going to be as greatly helped by cleaning spells. I think you're going to have to do this the old fashioned way. And, I think it's going to require a pair of good hands. Not one halfway severed and one good hand." Now she was smirking and he rolled his eyes. Despite the fact that she irritated him to no end, he had to admit that maybe she did indeed have a point. On both counts.

"If you are finished taking such joy in my pain then please, Hermione would you be so gracious as to help me?" His teeth were gritted and he practically spit his request. The laughter in her features made his stomach flop in frustration. He was surprised when she turned and walked away, stepping into his storeroom and disappearing from sight. She emerged a second later with several blank pieces of parchment and a bottle of something hazy blue in color. The last he recognized to be an antiseptic, he remained puzzled as to the reason for the parchment though. His unasked questions were answered when she transfigured one into a bandage, one into a small tray with grey flakes upon it and the last into a clear, empty dish. She turned to him and led him to sit on a stool near to her equipment. Relentlessly he let loose an impatient sigh and nearly wrenched himself free of her. 'Why on earth should I need her help when she is so ungrateful for mine?'

"Now Severus. If you move it's going to hurt. A lot." She gazed steadily at him, daring him to speak. For once, he remained silent and swallowed every urge to verbally thrash her in his impatience. She set to work. Removing to blood bandage from his hand, Hermione used a clean corner to gently wipe away some of the blood. The wound was an angry red, as if infected already, and deeper then either had thought. Reaching for the bottle of antiseptic and the tray of gray material, Hermione set them before her. Severus was surprised when she poured a fair amount of the potion into what he now recognized to be ash. Quirking an eyebrow, he looked coolly at her. "I've been researching potions. I've also come up with some of my own ideas. This for instance. After some experimenting, I've found that ash can be used as a sort of cleansing agent. Most types contain something called lye," she looked at him briefly but he only nodded for her to continue. "There is a type of wood that burns clean of this chemical. In my research, I was trying to find a way to make the application a bit more practical. Mixing the ash with antiseptic both thickens the mix and makes the antiseptic more potent. More so then if the potion is merely ingested. I'm hoping it serves well enough to clean your hand of any infection."

He watched her in silence. Amazed that she possessed such knowledge about potions. She was right. Ash was something well combined with medicinal potions but the Potions Master had never heard of anyone else doing it. For a moment he realized he should be affronted that she had uncovered one, of what he considered, 'his' secrets. But he couldn't be. Instead he felt something dangerously akin to pride glowing in his belly. She had only learned potions from him. He had instructed her. And while he had not led her in her research, he had been a factor of it. Smiling smugly he relaxed as she worked on him.

Hermione noticed the smirk on the Potion's Masters face but said nothing. Wrapping the last bit of bandage and securing it gently she placed his hand on the table.

"I'm finished." Severus snapped his gaze to hers and for a moment they regarded each other.

"Thank you." No sarcasm, no bite. He almost sounded genuine. Suddenly the guilt she had felt earlier resurfaced and she dropped her gaze, flushing red. "What is the matter now?"

"Nothing. I..well, I really am sorry for earlier." He waved his hand dissmisivly, rising from his perch on the stool.

"It seems to be a habit we are unable to avoid. Perhaps the next time we meet, some semblance of civility can reign for a few moments before you latch upon my throat." He fixed her with his best attempt at what he hoped to be a withering look. It was her turn to roll her eyes. She stood as well.

"Yes,. Me and my horrid temper." Hermione laughed again, and the sound made him smirk again.

"Kindly control it or else I will deduct house points. Whether you are a student or not." She was taken aback at his humor, or rather his attitude. He had a sense of humor, but she hadn't witnessed much of it aside from the pleasure he had taken in terrorizing his students. Her expression made him laugh softly. "It was unkind of me to treat you the way I did. Especially after what that idiot Weasely had done. And I too am sorry." He sobered and spoke very softly to her. The tension had returned to the room but this time it was a different kind. They stared at each of for long minutes, neither knowing what to say the replace the awkwardness that had settled. Severus swallowed and shuffled. His motion seemed to startle the girl before him.

"It's late."

"Indeed it is." A breath.

"I better go. I know I am keeping you from work." Suddenly the potion he had forgotten sprang to mind. It would be ruined now, but strangely he couldn't bring himself to care. Instead Severus stepped towards Hermione as she finally turned towards the door. He reached past her and pulled it open gently.

"Thank you for tending to my hand. Even though I most assuredly could have done so myself." Now his voice held a kind of teasing sarcasm. Pleased when she smiled and not knowing why, he smiled back.

"Well,. We both know how much I love imposing myself upon the unsuspecting. Goodnight Professor Snape."

"Ah. Good night Professor Granger. And a belated congratulations on your position. Now I am to be hounded by you month after month and I can't even strip away house points. How insufferable must you be?"

"Mind yourself Professor. Or I'll take it out on your students." With a grin she turned and slipped from the room. With the door shut securely, Severus turned and leaned against it for a moment. 'What the hell is wrong with me?' Not bothering to think on it he turned and walked to his bedchambers. The calming draught forgotten and now laying in a lumpy mass in the hot cauldron was unneeded now. Severus was tired and ready to sleep. He didn't puzzle over this either. Collapsing back onto his four-poster, he was asleep in minutes.

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A/NGah...wow. That was...so out of character and bad. Still...too lazy to change it. Unless of course you scream at me for it.

I might as well mention right now, that as I said before I got the idea from Pride and Prejudice. Now however, it's clear to many of you I'm not following the format. I didn't plan on it exactly. I just wanted to use bits and pieces.

Hermione is my Elizabeth

Snape is my Darcy

Ron is my Whickam

Dumbeldore will be my Bingley. etc etc...as more characters are introdced. But I'm not following the book, I dont think I can write anything that complex when im new at this paticular category. I would hate to ruin either the book or my story for anyone that way.

Quite obviously there have been some errors as well. I am sorry for them, but even after rereading I can't find all of them easily. Forgive me.

Thanks for the wonderful reviews everyone. More to come soon.

Poet