Broken Glass
By Lady Ebony
Warning: Yaoi fic, mentions of suicide
Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Trigun.
Characters: Nicholas x Vash
Promises are so easily broken, aren't they?
He promised he'd never leave. He promised to protect me, just as I promised to protect him. We me each other promises and then we broke them…
I remember the first day we met. He was so kind and sweet… and strangely alluring or maybe just strange. I looked at him and saw a strong man whose shoulders carried burdens that he had chosen to bear… but that is what priests do, right? You confess to them and they suddenly know all your secrets and then carry your burdens as their own to the lord and ask for his forgiveness. He tried to get me to confess that day, all because he saw me smile. How strange... I smile and he frowns and then I have to confess. I think I fell in love with him that very day… No, wait. That's not when I fell in love with the man I came to know as Nicholas D. Wolfwood.
The day I fell in love with Nick was the day we entered a shooting contest together to help a friend. We beat all the other contestants one by one until it was down to the two of us. Somehow I knew it would end up like that. In the end neither of us wanted to pull the trigger because that might end probably the best friendship either of us had ever had.
I remember that that day was when we first realized that we had feelings for each other and that those feelings were reciprocated. We went out to drink that night and got drunk as shit. We ended up in our hotel room through no fault of our own. We got kicked out of the bar and the insurance girls took pity on us and dragged us to our room where we got a straight hour of lecturing. When they finally left, Nick pulled out a couple of bottles of sake seemingly out of nowhere. We were already tipsy so the sake just sent us over. We went from talking about normal guy stuff (women, alcohol, guns and such), to talking about our hopes and dreams for the future and our reasons why we want to forget our pasts.
That's when things changed. We both realized that we had laid ourselves out for the other to see. Each and every hope, dream, fear placed in the others lap. The keys to our very souls handed over to eachother.
It was then that he said he loved me. It was then that I told him that I felt the same. We were both in shock at eachother's revelations but as the shock began to wear off, we leaned in for our fist kiss. That kiss was the most wonderful thing that I have experienced in my very long life and to know that I shall feel those kisses no more is a terrible feeling.
After that night we became inseparable. I couldn't get enough of him. The first night we made love has forever paled any other sexual experience that I have had, except maybe of course the many other times we made love.
The times we spent together were the best times of my life, just as the two years we spent were the longest years to have ever occurred within my existence. I wish I had never lost him.
The day he died was the worst day of my life and I wish that it had never happened. We had so many years to be together.
Why, Nicholas? Why did you have to go? Why did you leave me? These were the questions I asked the suns, the moons and the unforgiving stars, but there was no answer to my questions except silence.
I wonder what I could've done had I been there. Could I have saved him? Would he still be here with me if I had tried? There are no two words more accursed than 'What if.'
I wrote a poem the day he died. It probably won't mean anything to you so I didn't write it here.
I wish that I could say that I could live for him even though he's gone, but I can't take the pain of living anymore.
I hope that you find happiness in your lives, both of you and I hope you know that you were two of my best and only friends. I love you both but I have to go. Goodbye insurance girls.
Sincerely yours,
Vash the Stampede
Tears now fall from blue-green eyes as they look out upon the small town.
The wind whistled past Vash's ears as he took one last look at the stars. "My god, they're beautiful." Then he jumped of the cliff, to be with his beloved Nicholas at last.
Millie and Meryl entered the room that once belonged to their charge Vash the Stampede and found the letter. Meryl read the letter as tears filled hear eyes and knew that they were too late.
Months after Vash's suicide and burial next too his lover, the insurance girls found Vash's poem while going through his things. Here is how it read:
The flame of your love has been vanquished
In my heart lies an empty void
My life has lost all meaning
My soul has been destroyed
Your death has left me dead inside
I wish now for death's sweet kiss
Though it is your kisses
That I'll always miss
My love for you is gone
All I feel is numb
I wait for my absolution
I wait for death to come
Your love is gone
Like days gone past
Such as promises you made are like broken glass.
Fin
Author's Note – Kinda depressin' ain't it. This is of course my version of what happened after Wolfwood died. I hope you liked it. Please review, pretty please. If you don't well I hope you know that you will have destroyed a young girl's dream.