Disclaimer: I do not own any of the rights to the characters of The Rocky Horror Picture Show & Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. They belong to their respective owners.
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1
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"Read that over once more to me... yes... ahuh... okay that's perfect. Run it just like it is. No. I don't care if it's too long, I'm paying for this ad and it will say what I want it to say, no buts about it. What? No. Just... no. Now I'm very busy man, I must go. You're sure it will appear, though? Alright, I'll take your word for it. Thanks. Bye."
The phone was replaced in its cradle. The morning newspaper sat down on the table, rolled up next to the phone. A hand extended and lifted the paper slowly from its resting spot. The paper was unrolled and smoothed out, lifted up to meet its holder's vision. As it raised, the light flickered in front of the paper and illuminated the slick metal pin in the shape of a 'W' upon the holder's neck.
He inspected the contents of the newspaper, turning to the section where his ad would be placed the next morning. Taking a glance around the factory, he let out a long sigh and lowered his head behind the newspaper. Suddenly he heard a set of small footsteps come up from behind his chair. He raised his head to see one of his trusted factory workers standing in front of him. Turning his frown into a smile, he listened as the small man made several gestures and noises.
His eyes brightened. "Really? Tea!" He exclaimed, making several gestures of his own. He rolled his tongue and clicked his teeth in reply. The small man nodded and began away.
He carelessly threw the newspaper back on the table and raised from his seat, stooping over to pick up his cane from where it leaned against the chair. In a happy daze, he marched out in the direction the small man had went, and disappeared.
The newspaper hung halfway over the table's edge in disarray. It slowly began to sag, moving closer and closer to falling down. At once, it slipped off of its holding and sailed to the floor, the pages crumpling. Had anyone been present to see it, they would have noticed the strange headline which the paper had opened to:
WEIRD TRANSVESTITE ALIENS LAND!
COULD THIS BE THE END OF OUR PLANET AS WE KNOW IT?
"Master, I have the paper you asked for," Riffraff said in a monotonous tone, stepping towards Dr. Frank N. Furter's chair.
Frank clapped his hands together twice in an impatient manner. "Well, bring it here then. What are you waiting for?"
"I'm sorry, Master," he replied, coming up to the chair's arm and holding the rolled up newspaper to Frank who snatched it away rudely and began to rummage through it quickly. "See anything?" He asked curiously, staring down at the paper over Frank's shoulder.
Frank shook his head to himself, turning the pages under his fingers. "No... nothing yet. Oh, this is just disappointing. It's already been three weeks that I've been looking for somewhere to move my laboratory-- but why am I telling you this? You already know," he said dishearteningly. He thumbed through the sections and came to the page where property ads were placed. He shut his eyes tightly and turned his head up to the ceiling, praying that there would be something. In several moments, he turned his head back down to the newspaper and opened his eyes.
A pained smile formed over his face, scanning his eyes over the ads for various trailer homes and shacks. He bit his lip and closed his eyes once more, about to close the newspaper. "Oh, I'll never find anything!" He moaned. He turned the page and opened his eyes and was faced with a bright, colorful ad displaying a picture of a large factory-like building.
Riffraff extended his hand to the paper, placing his fingers around its edge. "I'm sorry you didn't find anything, Master. Maybe there will be luck tomorrow," he said, pulling the paper away from Frank.
"Hey!" Frank shouted, grabbing at the paper and returning it to his lap. "I'm not finished with that... I think I saw something."
"You saw something?"
Magenta had appeared on his other side. "You saw something?"
As well, Columbia had appeared behind his chair. "You saw something?"
Frank offered a curt nod. "I saw something." He quickly brushed past the pages, returning to the one where he had seen the brightly colored ad. He looked the ad over in concentration, reading it in his head. A smile spread over his lips. "Yes... yes... this is good..." He pointed a finger at the small wording. "Says here it's got over one hundred different rooms. That's just what I'm looking for!" He continued to look the descriptions over and nodded. "I think I'll give this factory a visit. Who's selling it?" He asked, squinting to look at the bottom of the box. He spotted contact information and smiled. "A Mr. Wonka..."
With the snap of Frank's fingers, Riffraff quickly took the paper from his lap and held it at his side. Frank crossed a leg over the other and placed his hands on his knees. "I'll be visiting you soon, Mr. Wonka. Very soon," Frank said in a sly tone. He threw his head back and a long fit of maniacal laughter emitted from his mouth. Riffraff, Magenta and Columbia joined in and they all laughed together.
Frank abruptly stopped laughing and threw a cold stare toward his helpers. "Why are you laughing? I didn't say anything funny." With glum expressions, they all lowered their heads to stare at their feet in shame. After several moments, Frank threw his head back and continued to laugh once again. The three helpers looked at eachother unsurely, shrugged, then continued their laughter for a second time.