AN—I wish the last chapter didn't have to end so sadly. So that's two chapters now where people die? Should I have some happy?… uhhh no? hehehe
PLUS! I would like to announce my excuse for lack of updates! For Christmas, the Fates saw it fit to give me a bit of romance… so I'm a little giddy… haha. And majorly preoccupied. Blame Kevin! Haha.. Is it obvious that I want to gush? A little. What can I say? I'm very happy… :smile:
And this chapter? If you were to order ALL of the chapters in the My immortal folder on my laptop by size? This would be in the top half. Hehe. ENJOY!
My Immortal
By BluWine
Chapter 20:: These Wounds Won't Seem To Heal
Through her unshed tears, Andromache watched as Achilles took a rope and wrapped it around Hector's bloodstained feet. The other end was made tied to the back of his chariot. Achilles jumped onto his chariot and rode a brief circle in front of the gates, leering at the royal family standing above. Then he rode off. No words were needed. It was simple as that. With the death of the prince, everything seemed to be so desperately hopeless.
She didn't know what to do. Andromache was a loss… She knew in a deep hidden niche of her mind that this death wouldn't leave her as abandoned as others who have lost husbands, fathers or brothers. She married the prince, the heir of Troy, had she not? She had Katriana and Acacius and her parents-in-law. And her precious son… Astyanax…
That was when the first sob escaped her throat and sank down to her knees, Katriana still beside her already in the trenches of her grief. Her son… The spitting image of his father in dignity and face… How will he live when he realizes that his father wouldn't return and that he was being dragged across the Anatolia like a rabbit by the ears?
"How will I tell Astyanax?" Andromache murmured looking at her friend. Katriana looked up, shaking her head furiously. Her cheeks were red as were her eyes and her face kept sniffing fitfully.
"I… I don't… know," Katriana replied. She took Andromache's hands in hers in an effort to calm both their shakes. "But I'll be there if you need me to be. I… I promise…"
Andromache nodded and just silently stood up. She put a hand on Katriana's shoulder and smiled sadly at her friend. "I need to be with my son alone…" She turned away but Katriana caught her hand.
"Don't do anything rash… please, Andromache…" Katriana begged. "Just don't do anything rash with yourself or Astyanax… If the drink, poison, cliffs or blade starts to become inviting, you run to me, understand?"
"I understand…"
Two had moved on to the consequences of Hector's death and the realizations they had of the life before them.
Five more remained.
Katri stared at the dark stains on the sand, wanting to run down and gather what she could to burn and honor the blood of the greatest warrior of Troy. On the other hand, she was frozen. She couldn't move. The man she'd slept next to for the last month threatened to kill her and then killed off Hector in her stead. Guilt wracked her brain and her knuckles turned white as Katri gripped the stonewalls.
Then, a hand closed over hers. Rough but warm, it eased the muscles that were painfully tense. Katriana turned her palm up and gripped the hand tightly. She looked down at the enclosed hands as she murmured, "It should have been me…"
"No… Never say that," Acacius shook his head. "Ever… This is how the gods intended it…" His lips reached her temple kissing it softly.
"The gods intend many things. It's the choices of those that actually concern those fates that make any real difference…" She stepped away from him taking her hand to her chest but Acacius was persistent in his comfort. He just countered her retreat and put his arms around her.
"Come on…" Acacius murmured. "We'll go to your chambers…" He felt her tense muscles soften and fall against him and he sighed in relief.
"I don't want to… Not yet… I want to stay here for awhile," Katri replied. "I don't want to leave yet…"
"It's cold… and it's getting dark."
"I'll come inside in a bit then… Please, Acacius. I just want to be alone…"
"Then make me the same promise Andromache made you." Katriana looked up at Acacius and saw his blue-green eyes pleading with her.
"I promise," Katri smiled softly, placing a kiss on his cheek before letting him go. "I just want some time to myself."
"Don't stay here too late… I have some things to attend to now that…" His eyes were cast down for a moment before he looked at her sadly yet again. "Come inside soon, love."
Katri nodded.
Now Acacius left Katri, Paris, Priam and Hecuba to their own devices.
Hecuba couldn't speak. She was just sobbing into her other son's shoulder and wailing hysterically. Katriana watched as Paris made futile attempts to calm his mother.
"Mother… please… Get a hold of yourself…"
Hecuba furiously shook her head, and clutched on to Paris' arm.
"Mother… Please!" Paris begged. "I know you are suffering but this hysteria will do nothing to change what is done…"
"We… We have to get him back," Hecuba cried out. "Get him…. Here… Please… Priam, go get him."
Priam sat, stonily watching the sunset on the day of son's death. No tear escaped the king's eyes but the pain was apparent.
"Get him!" Hecuba shrieked.
Paris shook his head in exasperation.
"I'm going to take her inside," Paris murmured to his father. Priam nodded stiffly and Paris and Hecuba moved up. Paris was pushing Hecuba to the stairs, making sure she kept moving and didn't fall into a heap but as he passed Katriana, looking at the both of them sympathetically, he froze.
"Don't…" Katri started knowing what was almost past Paris' lips.
"Please…" His hand made out to reach for her but she stepped back.
"No!" she shouted.
He didn't know why but something pushed him. Paris made a step toward Katri, his head leaning in to kiss her but he was halted by a resounding slap. This was now the second time that Katri struck him.
"I lost you too?" Paris asked, his eyes sadly staring up at her but she was just stared back angrily.
"You lost me a long time ago…" she said bitterly. She turned away and left him to it. She didn't catch the heartbroken face that he couldn't hide from anyone else. She didn't read the mind of a thoroughly confused young man who didn't understand why his heart felt like it was under the wheels of Achilles' chariot. He didn't love her… He knew that he didn't… At least, his mind knew that he didn't. His heart, on the other hand, begged to differ.
"I can't apologize enough for what my son's done to you," Priam said from his seat. Katri turned around from her stance by the walls. Everyone else was gone but Priam and Katri remained.
"I beg your pardon, your highness. I didn't understand you just then…" Katri replied stepping out of the shadows and into the king's sight.
"Come. Sit…" Priam gestured to the throne beside him.
"I don't think it would be very appropriate…"
"Nonsense… For the moment, I am a heartbroken father. For the last few years, and I'm sorry to say, for years to come, you are a heartbroken lover. We are merely two stones worn away by the same merciless tide. In that respect, we are equals," Priam said. "Come and sit by an old man."
Katri nodded and took the seat of the queen. It didn't bother her as much as she thought it would.
"You have no need to hide, Katriana. Everyone knows the story of you and Paris. My subjects constantly whisper of it in the shadows of the hall."
"I don't mean to be fodder for gossip, your highness."
"It's only gossip when it is a stretch from the truth… But I know the truth… The gossip does not know half of it, does it?"
"Your highness… please…"
"I just want to apologize for Paris. I don't know why he made such mistakes when it came to you but they were mistakes."
"You believe this was mistake?"
"I just lost a son… my heir, Katriana. I don't know a bigger mistake in the past years than letting Helen stay."
"Your highness!" Katriana gasped. "She's the princess… Your son's beloved…"
"Bollocks… It's only sex and lust and you, me and the rest of this city knows it," Priam scoffed.
Katriana turned red at Priam's bluntness and wanted to laugh off the uncomfortable weight in her gut but instead she stuttered, "Then why did you let her stay?"
"Hecuba knew that Paris had fallen for you. Coming home with the most beautiful woman in Greece was a prize to Troy and an omen that the two of you weren't meant to be," Priam shrugged. Then he sighed. "And I've done such a wrong in the respect of your Alexander. I couldn't make the same decision twice… Hecuba was so heartbroken… She had almost faded from me completely. I couldn't do it again."
Silence befell them. Katri had no idea what to say. She couldn't imagine the position of having to make such decisions. She understood that power though. When she remembered…
"I need to bring him back…" Priam said, interrupting her thoughts.
"Pardon?"
"Hector… I need to bring him back…" The old man struggled to his feet and Katriana was at his side helping him immediately.
"You can't… You'll be killed within sight of the camp!" Katri protested.
"I rule this land… I would like to think that I know every inch of it as if it was my own face," Priam replied.
"Please… It's too dangerous. I can't let you go out there alone. With no intention to offend your highness, but you are not as young as you used to be…" Katri reasoned. "You will not last within the Greeks encampment…"
"I will risk it to get my son back for a proper burial," Priam snapped. He shook away Katri's hands and stomped away. His strength was given to him by the adrenaline and determination in his blood. He didn't care for the possibilities… the fatal possibilities of going. He just needed to do something right by his family. He didn't even care that Katri hadn't followed him back to the castle. It was better that way. That way no one would see him slip out of the castle dressed in a simple black cloak and hunching away to the scaean gate to escape to the Greeks.
Priam was near the gate when another figure fell into stride beside him. This one was smaller than his stance, dressed in the darkness of another cloak.
"I will not let you go alone," the voice murmured from under the hood. Katri didn't need to see Priam nod to know that the king knew there was no use with arguing. "Either way, I can be of service. I know where Achilles' hut is exactly. You don't have to risk searching through random tents in hopes that it's the correct one."
The two emerged from the walls and made their way silently through the desert. Each step they took was taking them nearer to the danger that just defeated their most powerful warrior. To say the least, it was making their blood pound at their ears in fear but each step was taken firmly.
"Mommy!" Astyanax cried out from his bed. His nap had gone longer than it should have and now, as the night deepened, the little boy was wide-awake. "Mommy, I had this dream and there was horses and this really bright light…"
Andromache smiled down at her child as she sat beside him on his bed. She had wiped away her tears on the way to his chambers and was calm in Astyanax's presence… a bit… aloof… but calm nonetheless. She listened to Astyanax's dream about a great horse race with his father in the lead. There was a beam of light and suddenly it was Astyanax at the helm of the chariot and he was winning! Hector was right beside his son too, smiling proudly as Astyanax steered the chariot to victory.
"And… and… they gave me the wreath, Mommy! The wreath! And it was sooooo heavy, Mommy, but I was strong, right, Mommy?" Astyanax rambled on. Then… his words ceased abruptly. His eyes went to doorway and. "Papa?"
Andromache's eyes snapped up and she looked at the doorway, her breath catching. There was nothing there.
"Mommy… Papa was bleeding… I saw him… he was right there…" Astyanax murmured, his energy level somber. His brown eyes looked up at his mother, questioningly.
"Your Papa wasn't at the door, my love…" Andromache whispered.
"Yeeeees… He was! He was hurt! Mommy!! Where's Papa?" Astyanax was beginning to feel the sadness in his mother and it was affecting his own demeanor. The proud dream was erased from his memory. All he saw was the tears in his mother's eyes and the fear he didn't understand in his chest. "Where's Papa?"
"Somewhere very very far away," Andromache replied. She held out her arms and Astyanax, unable to comprehend what was happening, crawled into them to find some comfort.
"Where, Mommy? Is he in Sparta again?" Astyanax knew about Sparta… about how he had gone away for a long time but in the end he came back.
"No, my darling… Much farther than that."
"But he's coming home right? He'll be gone a long time but he'll come back, right?"
"I'm afraid not, Astyanax," Andromache whispered.
"But I want Papa! I want him now!" Astyanax whined. He struggled against his mother's arms and he could feel them tightening gently around him. They were trying to calm him but the concept of his father not returning was just so… unfathomable. It wasn't possible. He was… Hector always came back. ALWAYS. "I just saw him! At the door…"
"It was but an illusion, love… The gods were playing tricks on both of our minds."
"No! It was real! I saw him! He was hurt but he was smiling…. Then he went…. Gone…" Astyanax hushed yet again. Was it possible? Could Papa have really left him? "Why did he go so far?"
"He didn't have a choice… The Greeks made him leave…" Another piece fell into place in the little boy's head. He had seen his friends in years past. He noticed the way they would be the best playmates one day then the next… They would be really sad.
"Did he go where Phoebe's papa went?" Phoebe was a girl that he had played with a long time ago. For a girl, she was actually fun but one day she said that her papa wasn't coming back anymore and it was his Uncle Paris' entire fault. After that, Astyanax never got to play with Phoebe anymore… and her father never came to the castle again.
"Yes… that's exactly where YOUR papa went…" Andromache answered.
Astyanax shook his head. It was still too hard to understand. If he was with Phoebe's father, then couldn't they find a way home? Phoebe's father was one of the best warriors of Troy. HIS father was the best warrior of Troy. Couldn't they find a way home?
"I want Papa!" Astyanax yelled. He broke away from his mother's embrace. "I want Papa! PAPA!!!" He didn't understand why but he was now crying. Crying so hard it was making him shake and he was hitting his mother and screaming for his papa but all she did was take his little fisted hands' strikes and sit as she cried. "Where is he?!!?! PAPA! PAPA! PAPA! PAPA!!!"
Throughout the whole awkward conversation, Andromache's own head was calling for Hector to return when she knew in her heart that he wouldn't. She put a hand to her mouth to silence her sobs while she tried to seek comfort in the fact that, at least, her son wouldn't find out any other way. Well, what little comfort she could gather from that anyways…
"Is your mother all right?" Helen asked, as Paris entered their chambers. It was the first time he had in more than a month.
"She cried herself to sleep…" Paris replied, slipping off his old armor and decorations. He just threw them to the corner of the room and then laid himself down on the couch.
"And you?"
"I'm all right…"
"What happened to your face?" Helen looked at Paris by way of the mirror and saw the mark of a strike against Paris' tear-stained cheeks.
"She… hit me," Paris murmured. Helen nodded.
"You look horrible…"
"I know." Helen went to bed without even as much as a good night… much less a good night kiss but Paris was stuck in his own mind, his hand at his cheek, feeling the cold burn under his fingers. He remembered the defeated anger in Katri's eyes and he shut his own trying to keep the memories that, for some reason, kept slipping out of his mind. He knew he should be grieving for Hector… But he also knew there was business he needed to finish.
Something else was tugging at Paris' mind too. For the last month, he was remembering every moment of every day he spent with Katriana. Each second was clear and he could fill every day for the last twelve years with Katri's face alone… But he knew something was missing. He didn't know what. He knew there couldn't possibly be anything missing though. There was no gap in his memories…
Paris remembered his childhood… His visit with Katri helping her with every chore… He remembered the docks, when Katri was teasing him about failing in diplomacy miserably… But something was just simply missing.
Another was that… he remembered the last night he spent with her. But gradually, it faded… As if it was a painting on the palace walls long ago made, the memory of Katri from that night was turning into darkness. He noticed that he couldn't recall bits of pieces of the night. Paris would think that he was actually asleep but he would smell her sheets, or notice the glare from his wife and he would remember it all over again.
A snore brought Paris out of his thoughts and he looked to the bed. Helen was asleep on her side, her blond hair in a state of ordered and beautiful disarray. Paris' head tilted as he studied her noticing something he never noticed before, strangely enough.
"She snores," he murmured. He closed his eyes and remembered Katri again and how she slept, her eyes moving beneath her skin in a dream. Then he remembered the same eyes that were so… betrayed and angry and hurt. Paris wondered if she knew how pained he was that day to realize that he hurt her so badly but he shook his head. He realized he was being selfish… Katri hurt worse for his stupidity and actions. He stood up from the couch and ran a hand through his hair, sighing. It was time to return to his place of vigil.
"This is it…" Katri said to Priam. They had gone over the desert quietly and unseen though it took longer than Katri was comfortable with. She had to leave room for patience however. Her companion was an elderly, grieving man. The fact that he made it through the trip was remarkable. His knowledge of the land was unfathomable as well. "This is Achilles' tent."
Katri and Priam now stood behind the shelter, in its shadows. They could only hear the silence from the temporary home and the ruckus at the fires towards the center of the camp. There was a party of a sort, no doubt to celebrate the victory of Achilles. Briefly, Katri wondered about Briseis and wondered about her whereabouts in the camp. They only had so much time before they were discovered and she was determined to get all of them out of there alive and with Hector's body in tow.
"Thank you… You should leave now…" Priam said going to the door.
"I'm not leaving without you," Katri said simply. The determined look in her eyes was enough to keep arguments at bay.
"I had a feeling you would say that," Priam chuckled ruefully. Katri returned the smile and looked around for Odysseus.
"Your highness, I'll be staying out here. Go inside and do what you must…" Priam nodded and went inside the door. Katri kept watch for a moment and then started for the fires, her cloak secure around her head.
Katri moved through the drunken crowds unnoticed, mostly Myrmidons and Thessalians. She was just another figure in their alcohol-hazed mind. From the corner of her eye, she saw a funeral pyre and knew that Patroclus' ashes were burned in that pile. Her eyes moved across the faces and saw the telltale lonely figure in the outskirts of the drunks, leaning amusedly on a pole.
"Odysseus," she called softly as she came up beside him. The king's eyes immediately bulged the moment he realized the identity of the person beside him.
"Katriana! What are you doing here?!" Odysseus took a hasty look about and pulled Katri to the shadows. "You will get yourself killed!"
"Oh, don't worry. As long as fire's not involved, I'll be fine…" she blurted out without thinking. "Where's Achilles?"
"In his hut… And don't be so cocky! These men will RAPE you the moment they realize you're here!" Odysseus snapped.
"They can't touch me!" she rolled her eyes. "And Briseis?"
Odysseus paused.
"Well? Where is she?"
"She's hiding in my shelter… She's a mess… When Achilles brought back Hector, she looked like her heart was torn out," Odysseus replied.
"Take me to her…"
Odysseus nodded and took Katri's hand, leading her to a larger tent on the other side of camp.
"Where's Hector's body?" Katri asked, almost afraid of the answer.
"It was horribly desecrated…"
"Where is it, Odysseus?"
"It's near Patroclus' pyre. They were planning on throwing it to the ocean but they got drunk with glory before anything could happen."
"At least, we have a chance then," Katri sighed.
"What do you mean?"
"The king is here."
"What?!"
"Priam… is here… He wants Hector back. He's in Achilles' tent right now."
"He's probably dead now, if you speak the truth…"
Katriana halted their walk and looked up at Odysseus.
"You know Achilles as well as I do and you know that he wouldn't do that."
"I'd like to think I know him better, thank you."
"Please… I was there when he was born…" Katri muttered, entering the tent that Odysseus had marked with an emblem from Ithaca. Odysseus stood back with his brows furrowed.
"Wha…" He followed Katri inside and saw that she was already embracing Briseis who hadn't stopped crying since Achilles had returned with Hector.
"… Shhh… It'll be okay…"
"He killed him! He didn't even give back Hector to be buried and mourned properly. He just threw him to the dogs and let those bastards defile his body as if he had no honor, no respect for the dead!" Briseis sobbed.
"Did he hurt you?" Katri asked putting a hand to Briseis cheek but Briseis shook her head.
"He said he wouldn't hurt me… Even after all that, I think he still keeps to that promise…"
"He better," Katri murmured helping Briseis up. "Otherwise, I'd have Apollo on his arse on a moment's notice…" Odysseus heard the comment however and put a hand on her shoulder.
"What are you talking about?"
"What do you mean?" Katri blinked then she realized that her mouth had escaped its leash.
"You keep making these comments… And…"
"It's nothing… just my exhaustion running my mind, I think," Katri replied nonchalantly. Katri kept her hold on Briseis hand and turned to her again. "We need to get back to Achilles' tent."
"No!" Briseis cried out. "I won't! I don't want to see him ever again. I'll never forgive him for what he's done!"
"Don't be stupid! You'll forgive him!" Briseis narrowed her eyes and snapped her hand back.
"How dare you make that assumption! He killed Hector! He claimed to love me and he spilled my blood through my cousin! If I were never to see Achilles again, it'd be too soon!"
"But you love him… His one act of passion, abominable as it was, will never change the fact that you love him and the fact that you love him means that you'll never forget him, never stop thinking about him and never stop forgiving him for every wrong he does you and your own blood," Katri snapped, angrily. "Your futile obstinacy will just lead you to more heartache so if you don't mind, there are men here who don't feel the same way that Achilles feels about you (which, by the way, is love) and will most likely hurt us the moment they realize what we're doing… We need to get to Achilles now."
"Have you no remorse for the man that's protected you all these years?" Briseis asked bitterly.
"Yes! I loved Hector! With all my being! He was like a father to me!" Suddenly, Katri's tone softened. "But I can't grieve for him now for the same reason that he couldn't grieve for the soldiers that died before his eyes during battle. We're still in danger… More people can die and, if I don't swallow my emotions until I'm safely in my chambers, then those people could be me, you or your uncle."
"Uncle Priam is here?" Briseis looked up at Katri in wonder.
"Yes… In Achilles' tent begging for Hector's body back…" A sudden fell on the crowd outside and Katri tilted her head to the door. "And by the sound of that, I think the talk is over."
Odysseus put his head out of the door and motioned them forward.
"Is it all right to come out?" Katri asked.
"I think so," Odysseus answered.
"It's your choice… They all think you dead… You come out of this tent and your uncle sees you, you'd be obligated to return…" Katri said to Briseis. "You wouldn't be able to stay with Achilles." Katri could see the decision in Briseis' eyes long before it was made. Katri thought that the girl was being foolish… acting on the anger that she felt when she knew in her heart she would forgive and forget anyway… Katri thought she should have stayed but Briseis was the first to even step out into the open, Katriana at her heels.
They walked up to the chariot and it wasn't until Priam had called Briseis' name did Achilles realize that she was behind him.
"Uncle…" Briseis cried out when the man pulled her into a relieved embrace. Achilles turned to Katriana, his eyes downcast.
"You wouldn't have been able to kill me if you tried," Katri murmured.
"I know," Achilles said, looking up. "I'm sorry…"
"Forget it. You only acted exactly as your mother said…"
"Then why did you scream?"
"That didn't mean it didn't hurt…"
Achilles took a step back and shook his head, almost laughing.
"Most people wouldn't be as forgiving…"
"I'm not most people… You know that…"
"No… you're not…"
Katri turned and started for the chariot where Briseis and Priam stood hugging and talking.
"Tell her I love her…"
"Who?"
"My mother… Please…"
"I will…"
"And tell Briseis I'm coming back for her…"
"She knows…"
Katri went aboard the chariot and Priam started off. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Briseis look back towards the Greek warrior she had so hopelessly fallen for and Katri smiled sadly. Yes… she knew.
They returned to the city quietly. Briseis had gone to her chambers, which were left untouched out of hope and desperation. Priam went to his wife to announce the result of his adventure and Katri went to her own chambers hoping for a bath. Entering her bedroom, Katri lit only two candles of the bedroom she hadn't seen in quite awhile. One stayed by the door and another lit near the tub that she was filling quickly with hot water heated every night by the servants regardless of the occupant's presence. Katri always thought it was stupid but now she understood what they meant when they said they wanted to be ready for unexpected arrivals.
Katri undressed quickly and slipped into the tub, a fragrance from the soaps and flowers filling the air. Sighing, she sank into the water up to her neck and closed her eyes reveling in the silence and solitude only to be broken by a touch at the back of her neck. She shrieked for a moment and looked and saw that Paris was sitting at the edge of the tub, looking down at her.
"What in Hades name are you doing in here?" Katri snapped sinking lower, hoping that the petals and bubbles were protecting her modesty.
"Waiting for you…"
"What?"
"After you left, I couldn't leave the room… I needed to settle things between us…"
"But… I've been gone… a month…" That's when Katri realized that Paris' eyes looked tired and swollen. He was skinnier than when she'd left him. His scrawniness, for lack of a better word, was apparent in the simple tunic and skirt he wore. His hair was a mess and his whole demeanor was slumped. "Gods… damn you…" She rolled her eyes to the heavens in exasperation. She couldn't believe what she was about to do but so help her, she was going to do it. Time to care of the little sick boy again…
"I… I know I shouldn't be here…" Paris started.
"Shut up," she groaned, getting up. Katri didn't even bother to blush at her nudity while Paris turned a bright red in the darkness. She slipped on a robe and pointed to the tub. "Undress."
"What?" Paris froze and frowned.
"You're disgusting. You haven't bathed in awhile, have you? So undress and get in the tub…"
Paris just stood there and Katri made her way out. Paris, unsure, took off his clothing and slipped into the water Katri was just in herself. He felt a secret thrill in being in the water Katri was just naked in but he quickly put those thoughts away when he remembered what he was there for. It took awhile. In fact, the water was beginning to cool when Katriana returned, this time with food.
"You haven't eaten much either…" She put the food beside and took a jar of hair soap. "Eat," she ordered and began to wash away the old dirt, grime and oil.
"How come…"
"Shut up… You eat. I talk. That's how this will go while you're in this tub…" Katri said. Her hands were kneading at his scalp and Paris had to admit it was very relaxing and refreshing. "Yes… I am in love with you… I have been for a very long time actually. Long before you were a prince, I'd have you know… and staying with you all these years… Regardless of your marital status, and evidently through last month's little incident, my feelings never changed." Katri closed her eyes, and gritted her teeth. She had been preparing this lie for a while now. She never realized she'd have to do it while both were naked but the Fates were cruel. "But my love for you as a companion, brother and best friend far outweighs that… And to tell you the truth, I owe you a lot for letting me stay with you in the palace and for sharing your family with me when I had none left…"
"It's only in return after you shared your mother and home with me when I had none to begin with…"
"Mine wasn't exactly royalty and palaces though…"
"But yours was worth more than royalty and palaces… Mama was everything to me… So are you and I'm sorry that I don't…" His words halted when his heart twisted horribly in his chest and he suddenly heard the voice in his head.
Return your feelings… Say it, my prince.
"… Return your feelings…" He felt his mouth move without his control and the female voice vanished. Paris frowned, but put away the voice as a figment of his imagination.
"I know…" Katri sighed. Her hand took a little empty jar and rinsed the soap away from Paris' hair. She realized that his hair was much longer than she ever remembered it to be and smiled sadly. "I know…"
"I'm sorry that I hurt you…"
"I know…" Without warning, her arms wrapped around Paris from behind him. Paris pushed away the bread and put his hands on the arms clutching him. "It's just that… it's been so long… but these wounds won't seem to heal… and I think I need to leave before I go crazy…"
"Please don't…" Paris pleaded. "Don't leave… As selfish as it is… I need you here. Please…"
"Alexander…" she sighed. "It won't be the same…"
"It could only be half of what we used to have and anyone in this world would be satisfied with that friendship," he whispered into her ear as he leaned back.
"It won't be the same," Katri repeated. "I'd miss it too much with you around, Alex…"
"If it's any consolation, I'd miss it more knowing I'm probably the primary cause of our fallout…" Paris reasoned.
"Alexander…"
"Stay," he whispered again.
Katri hated herself for it. She wished that she was powerful enough to resist it. But she nodded. She stayed.
AN—Here it is! Done! Hope you enjoyed! Please review!
Review responses
Gayle Carling. Thank you for your compliments and they're very much appreciated. One of my fears is that my characters would change in a way I don't want them to change because I do want them to evolve. So you're comment made my day. Thank you!
Amanda. Tell me if you find that beautiful men book, okay? Haha. BUT I must say that now that the grief is coming, I don't want to dwell on it too much. I love Hector though. It's just that it's something I'm not very sure I can write. Write well, anyways. Otherwise, I hope you had a wonderful holiday season… mine's was quite nice. No beautiful men on my bed however. Darn it… but it's all right. My boyfriend (omg, I have one!) wouldn't have liked that. Hahehaheha
Dae. Too true about Helen… But she had to learn that not everything is about her. She used to think so. Now a little does of reality, thanks. When I wrote it, I didn't have hatred in mind. Just… indifference. Helen is human just not really treated as such.
ScreamMyLungsOut. Haven't heard 'nifty' before but nifty is good. Hehe.
Yuki. Yes! You did exactly what I wanted you to do! You made my Christmas! I wanted a view change in Helen and, bless your heart, you said you had one! THANK YOU!
Nevasaiel. The stupid git is still a stupid git… but I think it's safe to say that there is no more ParisHelen. At least not romantically. And I'm sorry it took so long. This chapter was suppose to be even longer but I had to cut something out because it didn't flow right. Maybe the next chapter… And thank you for the compliments on the chapter. I never tire of hearing them. TRUST me. And when will you be updating? Haha I'm kidding. Take your time.
Maren L P. I'm sorry that it took so long!!! SORRY SORRY SORRY! I hope you enjoyed this good sized chapter though. :grin:
Onelostdream. Frying pans are so… damaging though! Hahah. And Paris is learning… slowly but he's getting there.
Lady Vendea. You too! Bless your heart, you had a change of heart with Helen. No matter how small that was what I wanted and THANK you for it!
Dessdiana. As much as I would have loved to see Hector survive, I wanted to stay canon to that. You have any idea how horrible it was for me to have the power to let him live, and not save him?!!? Dead horrible. And I wish that it would have been that way but it can't. It wasn't meant to be. And I'm actually starting to think that I'm actually good at this writing thing because you felt sympathy or pity for Helen as well… Thank you!
NovemberWind. Yes… poor Hector. I was quite sad myself when it happened. But… life goes on… does it not? :sniff: Sad. I'm sad. I didn't want Hector to die but die he must. Things happened during the war that I couldn't ignore. Hector's death, the horse, Helen coming to Troy… those would be the things I couldn't ignore.
pierced-belly-button. I wouldn't have him not hung by his balls myself. But :shrug: Paris just holds so much power of Katri. The same way that Achilles has a hold on Briseis. It's ridiculous and absurd and so frigging stupid but love makes you do and say things that you wish you wouldn't but do so anyways. I'm not saying that Paris and Achilles are forgiven… more like… their sins are overlooked.
Trojan Nag. Me and my good writing… hahaha. Riiiiight. I still have doubts about that. Hector had to die… It was a significant point… and it was a good way to show Helen as something other than the high and mighty bitch that I sometimes make her. Hope you enjoyed though!
Larrikin. Best believe it. Hector is gone. :sniff: I wish he wasn't but he is! :sob: It's okay! It's okay! We'll get through somehow. Hahaha.
Bloomy Angel. Good things in the horizon!?!? Ha! Wait till you read the whole story! THEN you tell me about good things in the horizon! Hahah.
Shells. The day I'm offended by one of my precious reviewers will be the day the world froze over. If it snows in Key West… MAYBE I'll be offended by you guys so NO I wasn't offended by the last comment. Anyway, before I get overzealous again, I would like to point out that my intent from the last chapter was just accomplished. Quite well actually. You and some others were proof of that and I bow down because you felt something for Helen which was what I wanted. I bow down and adore you do it. Hahaha.
Anyways, hope you enjoyed. And see you next chapter.