Control

by neurofeces

TxT Tsukasa's nursed his crush on Tomonori for long enough, but when he takes action it only seems to drive the human further away. But does Tomonori really not feel the same? Or is he just afraid of a lack of control?Rated for sensuality in later chapter

8. 8 Repentance: Tomonori

Edit: okay, I was looking this over (and frowning mightily to myself as I noticed that the computer changes all my little question mark plus exclamation mark thingies into exclamation marks…) and suddenly I'm blinking there going 'hey…half of this chapter isn't there…'

(blink blink blink)

Uh huh, so after I was done sitting there for a few minutes stupidly, and then after the NEXT few minutes that I spent stressing out, I went home and copied the whole file over again. Apparently I had TWO versions marked "C8" in my floppy. One in Rich text format (wordpad) where I'd begun it on my desktop and then another on Word format where I'd finished it on my laptop. Guess which one I picked?

Yep…the old version.

Gee that was stupid…

But I think I only got a few little reviews since I posted it, so it's basically okay—though I can't thank enough the kind souls who gave me reviews for the horrible cutoff on the old version, I'm SO sorry! (and if people want to re-review they can come in anonymous and rebuke me mightily for my stupidity… (bows head and cringes)) Notably, you might want to re-read the torture scene because a few small details were filled in between the old and new version, plus the new version takes this from just over sixteen pages long, to being about twenty five pages long before all the paragraph spacing kicks in. (Yep…I think this IS officially the longest story in the fandom, all due to the power of excessive descriptiveness. (sweatdrop))

Uh huh…I'm still working on my super duper review responses for chapter nine (which is roughly 50 percent complete, and C10 after that has a good 20 percent or so done on it too) so unfortunately I'll have to skip them again for this chapter just like in the old version. (sigh) I'm really sorry, but I'd feel really really bad if I replied to some people and not others. (plus I'm scared about getting lynched in the parking lot and the bishies being freed to do whatever they want upon my death. Something about Lafayel and muffins, and Mizunagi taking over the world with hospital forms and chicken spit or such)

However, I DID add some goofing around in a parody at the end of the chapter—the only reason that was left off before was because, as I said, I accidentally selected the old version of this chapter…also that isn't something that there's any great danger of doing later on, it's just that the torture scene was written this past summer for chapter eleven of this on the old storyline that I abandoned.(For curiosity's sake, the old storyline was abandoned because it was too similar to foolishmortal's "the angel" storyline. Tsukasa ends up running away and staying with Gabriel and co. while both sides lament being separated, big happy ending, lots of hearts and stars…nope. Not for me. My approach would have been far too simplistic.) Teaser hint:The new story line has battle scenes, and subplots, and eraser OCs based off research I did on the subject(The "Azrael" in this chapter will be one such OC others that I'm sure I will use will be Rayyu, and…well I want to keep at least one a secret…you'll see them in C10(wink))…all in all it's going to be a lot more interesting…ooh, and I think there's even a bit of a love triangle (wicked grin) I'm positively sadistic! (cackles) between who? I'm not saying!

Anyway…Stuff's been going a little slower because "Gracious Wings" has been plot-bunnying me. (I have like five chapters done for that…It's been plot bunnying me for a long time before I posted it…I have some things that are pre-Control era writing that I worked on but haven't posted yet…I never know what I'm going to polish up sometimes)I know, I'm not happy either, but since it's basically the intro for "Control" so I feel slightly less bad (I mean…I'd still be throwing you guys some bones…(sheepish smile)). I have such a kick-arse few chapters coming up…I get to do MY oh-so-canon take on the scene where T and T first meet (oh the rain, the amnesia…the NAKEDNESS of it all! (cackle)). Oh yes…another reason why I'm a bit delayed is that I need to write a whole freaking book for my dad. It's been stealing a good bit of my time too as can be expected. (supposedly I need to get published by the end of the school year, but I'll rant about that in more detail in the great time consuming intro to C9)

Old dedications and such are as follows.

Thanks for the trouble of re-reading…I hope it's worth it.

This chapter is dedicated to MOG because she doesn't even know the fandom or who the heck is who or what, and all she has to go on is some swiped scans so she can see what the characters even look like (reaction: ooh! Bishies! What's this called again? Tsukasa's pretty…Ooh and Tomonori looks cool! (ahem)), but she reads this because I stress out about it and ramble about it and ask her what she thinks about my horrible descent into the world of shounan-ai. And somehow in all of this, manages to corrupt me further and further down this dreaded path of perviness with her riotously funny sense of humor.

Here's to MOG! My first guiding prophet on the path to shounan-ai. For reading on out of sheer friendship and kindness and an attempt to…um…blow up my ego it seems--Metro! Stop her! (grin) I am eternally grateful.

If ever there's a person who deserves praise, it's MOG, because if it weren't for her running around on my LJ with her little Anonymous comments and entertaining me with a vast and complicated sort of weird demented self story roleplay thing where Yugi-oh, Demon Diary, and other such things are pushed to the limits of their sanity just so we can have a laugh, I probably would still be focused on trying to act depressed and serious all the time.

Here's to not only a great writer, and a wonderful person, but a rather demented and deluded and all around strange sort of friend that no person's life would be interesting without.

Thanks for everything MOG, and please don't feed the babies, Raenef…(cackle)

…By the way, when IS Eclipse due? It's a miracle he hasn't miscarried with us going on all the time and what with all the unstable plothole crossoverness. I would have expected him to make more of a fuss than Kaiba being a demon and all…(giggle)…um yes…like that…see why I like her?

MOG, you are an angel….and no that's not a typo for 'Alister'. Grr.

Also to Fyredra who has determined that she likes my writing even when she doesn't know it's me who's doing it. Lafayel's official first fangirl! Also…um…technically my most noble moderator on the forum (bows) Your review for AA will be legendary, and is also dedicated a place of honor on my wall of shame (it's my shame to be writing like this anyway…(blush)) Hooray for fringe pairings! And you get that fic up so I can read and drool and praise you relentlessly (cackle) And if you think TXT is sugary, have you seen what I've done to it?

Well…whatever you're doing, you are awesome….and the only one in the world who could probably teach me how to do a proper LJ cut without me exploding into a fit of epilepsy or something.

BOTH OF THESE TWO WONDERFUL GIRLS ARE PROUD MEMBERS OF THE MARQUEEING ONION SQUAD! POWER TO THE ONION!

Rest in peace sinners! (wink)

Warnings: (oh boy, here it comes), Shounan-ai--um yeah…you know that already, Christian themes (if you're offended, boo-freaking-hoo, you can deal with it, and if you can't, then by all means flame me and I'll roll my eyes and mutter stuff about you behind your back.(grin) I don't think it's exactly offensive or anything to whine about, so keep it to yourself…), Graphic PG-13 worthy torture scene (in the dream of course…it doesn't just randomly pop up y'know.), Tomonori being uber-angsty and too smart for his own good (just get a grip and a happy pill or something dude…), and oh-sweet-Jesus-have-mercy…is that FLUFF? OY, um… occasional swear words (hence the rating, lack-wit (good naturedly sarcastic)), The authoress PMS-ing…er…sorry…you get the point though. (ahem)

-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-

"It is much easier to repent of sins we have already committed than to repent of those we intend to commit"-Josh Billings

"Pride ruined the angels,

Their shame them restores;

And the joy that is sweetest

Lurks in stings of remorse.

Have I a lover

Who is noble and free?--

I would he were nobler

Than to love me."

-excerpt from The Sphinx, Ralph Waldo Emerson

-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-O-o-

'Forgive me...Forgive me for betraying your word my Lord.' Tomonori prayed feverishly, a droplet of sweat rolling down his forehead, trickling over his temple catching in the strands of dark hair that had fallen against his face. The droplet of sweat added more dampness to the already moist strands of hair, clumping them slightly, adding even more desperation to his appearance. His robe was still torn in some places from the rose bushes earlier in the day, his face was even paler than usual with guilt or perhaps even fear, and now with the cold sweat making his hair damp, he looked truly distressed. And indeed, he was.

But who wouldn't be in his position?

Temptation had come to him from the hands of an angel, and now, born at it's hands was this new sprouted crop of sin growing up in him…hardly a comforting occasion even if you DIDN'T happen to be a deeply religious man, and preist to boot.

The church was a place of protection, an arsenal of weaponry and shields to a member of Wiz-Dom…and yet… Even here he couldn't escape his actions, his thoughts, his feelings…

In here of all places, he was almost more of a sinner than he was when he was outside of it's heavy wooden doors. The angel was not sinning of course! He had probably been sent by God to test him!

Yes, yes…so easy to sweep away the guilt from the young boy and leave his soul clean and white and pure, while his own grew all the more caked with filthy sin.

He'd been tested by heaven and he had failed. His soul was in danger now, and it was all he could do to try to snatch it from the gates of Hell immediately, and beg for forgiveness…

So why did the flames of Hell feel so comforting and warm to him now? So…tempting?

His brow was furrowed into an expression of pain, his eyes lifted to the small figure hanging on the golden cross on the table above him. The expressively suffering face with it's crown of thorns, and sad eyes, looked down at him. As though to say He was disappointed. Well no wonder! Tomonori was disappointed with himself, God could be disappointed with him so much more… Tomonori bowed his head again, heart pounding all the louder. 'How could I…?'

This was a betrayal to him, an abomination—HE was an abomination.

He'd broken a line he wasn't supposed to cross—that NOBODY was supposed to cross, especially not one in his position!

And yet, it still didn't seem so much of a line to have crossed with God, but a line that he had crossed with Tsukasa….

He'd lied to him. He'd hurt him by doing so…He'd hurt…that beautiful, innocent boy, he'd LIED! He'd never had to lie to him before…he'd always been able to tell him everything, even when he had to go off to do something his faction thought secret, he would tell Tsukasa that was what he was doing. He'd never had to do this to him before…and…he didn't like it. He REALLY didn't like it. He hated lying to Tsukasa, he didn't' ever want to do it again, but at this rate, he probably would have to do it again and again and again, just to keep up this façade…just to hope all of this faded away…

Since when did he worship an angel more than the angel's maker…?

His knees were aching beneath him, but he still felt unworthy, unforgiven. Like he'd somehow been stained...but not by Tsukasa's actions of course! His heart softened, surprised at the thought

…He couldn't blame the angel for all this. He wasn't unworthy because Tsukasa had kissed him, or because the eraser loved him. He was worried about that—he wasn't good enough, not for anyone, and certainly not for Tsukasa! But even this didn't make him dirtied in any way—it wasn't like Tsukasa could help what he was…Tomonori's subconscious had been able to offer that much mercy from his rules and ordinances and guidelines for his life, to the boy at least.

No, rather he was unclean because he wanted the same thing. He was ashamed of himself, not of Tsukasa. Ashamed of his kissing Tsukasa rather than the other way around…he set this up in his mind once again as though to reassure and remind himself… he could never stay upset with Tsukasa…he certainly couldn't do it now, not even for something like this. It would be too trivial an end to their dear friendship.

Though it had certainly been shaken now at best…how could he expect Tsukasa to settle for being a friend when the angel so obviously wanted him to be more?

'But….I can't!'

If he would ever admit it…He didn't understand why he was wrong when the angel wasn't... scratch that, He knew that he could never accept Tsukasa doing anything wrong. It was a fond blindness. He knew it existed, but Tsukasa was a good person still…and so far he had never sought to take advantage of that blindness—and he HAD to know it existed…

He admitted it to himself hesitantly, allowing his thoughts to carry on, each into their own threads and conclusions.

Tomonori's heart softened at the thought 'It's so very kind of him not to take advantage of the way I treat him…Not to use my trust…Any parent should dream of that…even if I'm not really his parent…' Warm fondness filled the seemingly present hole in his chest. Something that had melted away and left him earlier that day…it seemed to melt again when he thought too long about Tsukasa. He stopped himself again, feeling that coldness with the absence of the thoughts for the angel of light. 'Dark…my thoughts are dark without his light on them…'. But he bared his teeth in a strangely expressive gesture, almost in disgust when his weakness longed to go back to this warmth that thinking about Tsukasa bestowed on him.

If this was a drug, and that was it's high, then he had to break this habit before he found himself further addicted, unable to stop…

'yes…this has to stop…whether I want it to or not…'

But perhaps he was already too far gone, too addicted to pull back without tearing something to pieces, even if it was only the threads of addiction, of hormonal attraction—the boy was very attractive after all…

Tomonori let go another heavy sigh, shifting slightly on his numbing but still painful knees.

This pain…he deserved it. It was a SMALL punishment compared to what his words had done to Tsukasa. Again the vision of the boy's bleeding back came to him, his little pale face streaked with tears in that strange unconsciousness…

And he had caused that…

It was unfortunate in a way that Tsukasa was so good, so pure, so honest even…Tsukasa certainly wouldn't let him see the innocence he now had, but instead called attention to his past…because he felt so…so guilty about it, that he had to tell Tomonori, otherwise he probably felt like he was lying… Tomonori smiled to himself, feeling warmth again at the fact that he was the person Tsukasa trusted, that he was the person Tsukasa confided in…that their friendship was special…

And his past…Tomonori didn't care about his past! and he'd told him so! Told him that he was no longer Israfel, that he was a simple and innocent human boy, and his family—his only family now. Those bleeding scars weren't something horrible to him aside from when they became a physical mark of how deeply Tomonori had wounded him by pushing him away… Tomonori had previously been shocked, but not repulsed by the marks…he hadn't thought Tsukasa to be ugly or deformed—quite the contrary in fact! He didn't mind the scars except that they pained Tsukasa so much…he seemed almost ashamed of them, even though he had begun to go to swimming and had become less self conscious—saying that they were a part of him too. But they weren't a part that he seemed to like…Not that Tomonori minded them. But Tsukasa didn't listen…He didn't listen to him at all! Refusing to believe…believe that Tomonori could see past these dark acts in his past.

Tomonori almost smiled to himself again, though it would have been a humorless, bitter smile at that. What could he possibly say to him about this? Was there any comment that wouldn't offend or horrify the boy? 'My dear Tsukasa…don't you know by now that this war gives everyone demons in their past that they never wish to see again?' He sighed again. Demons. Yes. 'sometimes literal ones…' he thought to himself moodily. His own mental word choice was ruthless and unforgiving to him. Why should he gain unbidden pity if he could not give it to others?

…He hadn't survived this long because he was hesitant to bring death to a demon should it attack him…Simply because Tsukasa had killed humans, ones that he now knew and befriended, didn't make it any different. All of those who were part of the Aquarian Age bore blood on their hands from the age their powers sprang into being. Tomonori was a Demon Hunter, that was his title, his task, his work, his mark of having survived. Those who did not kill could not survive…and yet…Tomonori hadn't killed anything since he'd been mindbroken…he somehow hadn't been able to give the final blow…not when his comrade was a Darklore…not when it would have so crushed his master should she have known—she so hated to even so much as HEAR about people being hurt…not when Tsukasa's past and the act of killing made him so anguished and horrified and terrified of himself…Tomonori had reasoned that he didn't want to provoke any reference in his own actions to the past sins that Tsukasa so despised himself for doing—Tsukasa of course mattered to him more than the others, even his master. Though she was certainly a large factor as well.

But still…what could he say?

'The past should not hinder us like this if we have made progress in the present to correct it's mistakes forever.' Could he ever possibly bring himself to say this to Tsukasa? When he could risk hurting him? Unprotected words could wound him so easily…

He could see the imagined face burst into tears of frustration and anger 'You wouldn't understand! How can you say something like that about the past! Yours is perfect compared to mine!' and then he would have to back down, apologize, try to calm the anguished boy…and…he didn't know if he could do that the right way, if he could risk it. The sad reminiscence that occasionally graced the angel's features was bad enough, but to be the cause of such anguish, to presume that he knew what was best to say to him when he still knew so little…that wasn't a risk he had the strength, or the longing to assume, even to try to reassure poor Tsukasa.

He forced himself to stop accusing the boy in his head—that was what he saw his own 'distantness' as after all. His protective blindness to the boy was—like all his strictness—even harder on himself then it was on others. Tsukasa's choice…no…he didn't even have a choice…all hormones, that's what it had to be! He was probably completely blameless for his actions, they probably couldn't be controlled… This couldn't be real…he was too young to love with that sort of 'commitment'. This had to be one of those common flash crushes…they hit lots of people Tsukasa's age…this was natural…right? And Tomonori was…well…he knew he was important to Tsukasa…that had to explain it somewhat…right?

Tomonori allowed himself to grimace now that nobody was watching 'is it right? I can't understand him at all sometimes, and he's not like other humans…he's…so different in how he looks at the world sometimes…what if I'm wrong about him again?'

When Tomonori was pessimistic, Tsukasa had shown him how to smile and be happy. And when the boy became depressed and upset, lost in his past, Tomonori tried to comfort and support him, cheer him up…They did all they could to help one another, and Tomonori hated the idea that he might stumble in his assumptions and make a choice that would make Tsukasa dreadfully upset with him…

That was what made this so hard an addiction to break, because he couldn't lose it's cause. This was a drug that would heal as well as break if used the wrong way…no…Tsukasa wasn't to be USED like some useless controlling chemical…he wasn't just some addiction Tomonori had to break…he was a person…a very dear person…and therefore he couldn't possibly turn him away…no…he couldn't…

Because he cared too much…and that was the problem.

But amidst all their caring, some things, the boy simply couldn't seem to understand…simple things: such as Reading and Writing, they had always been a little difficult for him. Tomonori had never quite understand why until he found out that Tsukasa was an Eraser—Because Erasers had no written language whatsoever. The language was purely verbal. Sounds transformed into marks on a paper had given Tsukasa much difficulty—he just couldn't seem to grasp the concept for innumerable weeks. It wasn't something that was possible from his perspective of thinking, how could this funny little mark, done just so…how can it become this word which I speak? It's only a mark on paper!

Tomonori sighed smiling to himself at the boy's remembered frustration. At the time Tomonori hadn't understand it at all as to why this could be so difficult, but if the boy could like him despite all of that, he had been quite prepared to be patient.

His schooling had been mostly tutored by Tomonori in that first year to help him learn the written language. Conveniently, it had had allowed Tsukasa's unusual closeness to the teacher to be a little less noticeable—people assumed they had become friends through the tutoring rather than asking questions as to how he had been discovered, and to why he might be living with him…Tomonori being a priest, with bad publicity to his kind when it came to living with a young boy all alone. Still, it had been easier this way to allow Tsukasa to fit in. The boy's stunning looks had instantly found him a place as far as girls went, but the male portion of the school had been a little more cautious, more skeptical…His uncommon politeness, his high voice, and his frail appearance had given him a little trouble at first, not to mention he was blond, which gave him many dirty or envious looks straight off. He certainly stood out. If anyone had found out that he could barely read or write, it would have only added kindling to the flames.

People knew he was not in normal classes, but the common notion was that he was a Missionary kid…an exchange student of sorts, possibly dropped off in Japan while his family was undercover in some place that wasn't so apt to accept their faith…China had been the common choice for this rumor with it's still harsh view towards Christianity (though that only made it more of a badge of credit to a missionary's name who went there and converted people). The rumor easily explained why he wouldn't know how to write Japanese yet—he could have been anywhere in the world!

And with this far more exciting bit of gossip, nobody had really thought to be interested in the truth until later on in the year when people began to notice that he said things like 'no…I really don't know where they are at all, I…don't really know much of anything'

Then when it had spread that he had amnesia, gossip had fanned even higher. Some poor braniac had let loose the specifics on the condition of disassociative amnesia—that it was brought on by a traumatic event. The rumors had spun long and fanciful about what possible traumatic event could have happened to him: Was he a boy who had watched his family killed? Was he kidnapped? Raped?(he was pretty after all, and delicate seeming, it wouldn't have been to hard to overpower him if you had such a malicious intent…) Did he commit some sort of crime?

It had blown completely out of proportion, until poor Tsukasa had simply burst into tears one day once they reached home--much to Tomonori's alarm.

"Can't they see I don't want to talk about all these things, that they're not true? Why can't they just leave me alone? Did I do something wrong!" Tomonori had shaken his head, still alarmed by the boy's outburst, shocked, even horrified at his sobs.

"Calm down…this isn't your fault. No. It's because you're different…Because you don't know the facts and so you can't correct them, no matter how hard you try…people can be cruel when they're curious." The small boy had bitten his lip tears welling in his eyes anew, turning them away from the older man. His body shook in a sob "Oh…I wish I could remember…It would put a stop to all of this…I wish I knew who my parents are…if they really are such wonderful heroes…even if they were killed by the erasers just trying to rescue me…I just wish I knew…"

The boy's shoulders shook as he put his head in his hands, long ponytail of hair frothing over his back, contrasting right against his black uniform. "People will gossip at anything." Tomonori had replied quietly, tentatively touching Tsukasa's shoulder. "You look different, you're polite, you're kind, you are a really very wonderful person. Some people just can't take that…like they would prefer that you were mean and nasty and horrible, and that this is all a façade just so they can feel better about themselves." Tsukasa's eyes had widened in shock, staring up at the older man "B-But, I would never…" Tomonori gripped his shoulder more firmly "I know…I know. But some people want you to be something you're not just because how wonderful you are makes them see how terrible they are in comparison. You have to be patient, it will fade away. And you mustn't become a horrible person just to get back at them…you shouldn't spoil who you are just for other people. Not when there's so much goodness in you." He put his hand to Tsukasa's head and tried to smile for his sake.

Tsukasa's cheeks had darkened in a charming blush, but it was ruined by fresh tears trickling down his cheeks, he fiddled embarrassedly with a long lock of his tied back hair. He paused staring at it. "Thank you." Tomonori nodded, the smile coming more easily now. Tsukasa's eyes became suddenly sadder as he stared at the blond hair in his palm. He sighed depressedly "…maybe I should be more normal then…" He'd murmured to himself. He quickly wiped his eyes and pulled his hair loose, letting it fall down his back freely, it was easily down to his waist. Hair that would make a girl envious for it's color and softness.

His large eyes lifted to look at Tomonori. "Nakaura-san…you've been so kind to me…could I ask you to…c-cut my hair?" Tomonori's eyes widened. He had been shocked at the request. The boy's hair was so beautiful it seemed almost a sin to want to cut it. "Why!" Tomonori had asked, unable to mask the shock from his voice. "Because it'll help me fit in…because people hate it!" Tsukasa had said miserably, his voice tight with unhappiness, his small hands curled into fists. He obviously didn't want to lose his hair either. More tears slipped down his face as he seemed to realize what he was doing… His hair was something he had from before, from the past he couldn't remember. Hair that shimmered in a streak of light blond—the exact color of malt…it was one thing he didn't have to struggle to remember…one thing that was HIM—the person he had lost…and now he was giving it up? "I don't. I don't hate you at all. You know that, right?" Tomonori had said, concern bordering on being stricken. This was a strangely dark attitude for his friend to take. His gloom was frightening considering how happy he had once been, back when he had first awakened without his memories…now he was becoming unhappy and depressed. It affected Tomonori as well, this new attitude of Tsukasa's…

Tsukasa had smiled sadly shaking his head. "I know…You're…different. I feel like you would like me no matter what I did, Nakaura-san…I wish everyone was as nice as you are."

Tomonori remembered the long moment of silence before he sighed, in which he had paled and attempted to hide it without success. He hadn't known what to say, and so, he had ignored it as well as he could.

"I-If you really want me to, I'll cut your hair. But I want you to be sure. I'm certain that if you decide you don't like how it looks it will take you years to grow it back…Do you understand what you're doing Amou? Are you absolutely sure that this is what you want?" Tsukasa had closed his eyes, tears snaking from under his eyelids, he gripped his hands into tighter fists. "I'm sure…I'm tired of all of this…I can't be invisible if people are always looking at my hair…and people sometimes think I'm a girl…Yeah…I want to cut it." Tomonori remembered his heavy sigh. "Alright Amou…if you're sure…Just let me get a towel and the scissors. You'll have to tell me how long or short you want it."

Tsukasa's voice had been shaky "Nakaura-san? uh…can you call me…'Tsukasa'?"

Tomonori had paused, then turned to look at him, blinking once. Tsukasa's cheeks suddenly reddened as though embarrassed again, asking if maybe this was too much with his eyes. Tomonori remembered his mild confusion and awkwardness. "O-Of course…Tsukasa." Tsukasa's blush had doubled in it's deepness and a dazzling smile had slipped over his face. "Thank you…for everything, Nakaura-san, you always help me feel better…I'm sorry to give you so much trouble and all."

Tomonori remembered how his embarrassed expression had grown more flustered by a fraction, and he'd fumbled with his glasses for a moment, suddenly alarmed by the boy's praise. "I-It's no problem at all. …We are…family…aren't we? That's what families do for each other…isn't it?" Tsukasa's face had glowed with affection that would have been enough to make anyone blush self consciously. He looked down at his small pale hands. "Thank you anyway." He'd looked back up at him, gratefully. Tomonori had slowly bowed his head in return, feeling almost bewildered. "D-don't worry about it. I always want to help you, Am-…Tsukasa." It had felt so strange at first…calling him by that name. Tsukasa nodded, still smiling. "I know…I'm glad I have you for my friend Nakaura-san." Tomonori had smiled to himself nervously, turning his back to hide his hesitation as he asked, busying himself with getting the scissors. He chewed on the inside of his cheek before finally saying in what he hoped was a nonchalant manner, "You don't have to call me that…You can call me Tomonori if you want…"

Nobody had called him that since his family had been killed. And only his family had called him by that name…one thing that he possessed and kept hold of zealously…this was what he would give to Tsukasa. Status as his family…

He tensed waiting for a response. He slowly turned around bracing himself for Tsukasa's look of shock, but instead he found the boy wide eyed, smiling brilliantly "Oh!…thank you so much Tomonori-san!" Something about hearing that name again no longer filled him with sadness when the boy said it. It just seemed right coming from his kind, polite, gentle mouth. Though he hadn't heard it in years. Though he still felt a pain in his chest at its use… This was his new family, this boy. And this was his name to use.

Tomonori sighed, lost in the memory, a nostalgic smile on his face, unbeknownst even to him.

He would always remember that first time Tsukasa had called him by name…

The doctors had assumed it was a side effect of his amnesia—Tsukasa's difficulty with written words, and Tomonori had been filled with his own troubles at the time, so he had welcomed the work of 're-teaching' Tsukasa how to read and write. It had been a distraction, a welcome one.

As isolated as his years in the orphanage had been, he was never completely alone. Even though he had never truly befriended or been befriended by any of the children his age—since he had been so consumed in making himself strong enough to defend himself—he had enjoyed watching them, and being surrounded by them. He had been small at first. Small and slender with a build much like Tsukasa's, but soon his mixed blood had begun to show itself…though he still looked Asian like his mother, he had soon gained his father's impressive height. And for the minor disadvantages—powers he never had fully mastered as a full blooded WIZ-DOM would have, he had found advantages with a more nimble mind.

His childhood had fashioned him into a reasonably able individual. He wasn't a powerful WIZ-DOM, but he was adequate. And he had good relations with independent mercenaries, like Tracer. He came up with unique battle tactics due to long hours poring over books memorizing battles—both human history and the secret history of the Aquarian Age. Armed with all these accomplishments, he had gone into the world on his own…and had gradually begun to fall apart.

He'd never noticed how much he enjoyed himself when he was young. His thoughts had been gloomy. And he was hesitant to reach out to bring others close for fear that they might be killed. A fear he had deadened over the years—though nonetheless, many of the children at the orphanage had been killed before adulthood. WIZ-DOM's war with the Darklore was brutal and merciless. Even children were targets…sometimes specifically. He had survived along with about sixty percent of his orphanage's 'graduation year'. The day he turned eighteen he became a demon hunter in his own right. He had entered under apprenticeship to one of the elder demon hunters—the man he still called 'father' not only because of his role as a preist, but because he had been a father to him, in a distant way…But though this had slowed his internal destruction, it had not been enough to stop his downward descent.

Being alone and on his own out in the world had torn at him. He'd immersed himself in the church just to sate his longing to be around others to know OF them, even if he didn't truly know them… It had helped…but not much.

There had been one incident before Tsukasa…one incident where he had been overtaken by despair…

He shuddered suddenly, awakening his mind back to the layer of thought he had been peeling at like a potato just before this musing on himself. The eraser. The glorious eraser that had rescued his life!

They had both taken to one another with relief. Tsukasa's past had swelled with the gossip of school rumors… But he had been relatively untouched. To plain to be worth attention. His air had been strict and intelligent, but beneath that had held an air of having been somewhat washed out. A shadow…Besides that, he himself was a relatively new addition to the school's staff. Nobody had even known that they really lived together until later on in the year, and by then it didn't matter as much.

Certainly once it got around that they lived together, there were a few rumors, but by then, Tsukasa had his defenders, and Tomonori had adapted his teaching style to the students he had control over quite effectively. Soon the babble died down. They had been very careful to keep their image free from misunderstanding, always calling one another by their last names when in front of others, and carefully making sure that they watched out for and defended each other when they weren't present to defend themselves.

'He's an amazing person, that's for sure…'

…The very fact that Tsukasa had in fact actually LEARNED to read and write Japanese well enough to be put in standard classes the next year was remarkable, once he had begun to associate the marks he was making with spoken sounds, it had suddenly gone much more quickly—he was hardly stupid… just naïve and innocent… Then after it had all died down, and people had begun to accept Tsukasa as a part of their school…in their second year at Seika High together as teacher and student…Mana Kirihara had transferred in…and everything had changed…oh how it had changed…

Tomonori forced himself to stop, angry at his own inner turmoil, at his own drifting in the past after he'd argued to himself about how it wasn't important. 'It isn't his fault!…He can't help it…He probably didn't WANT to feel this way for me, it's not something he could control…if there are no females in his race, then it would simply be something natural to him…and…anyway…it's not his fault that I…I…' He slammed his fists into the ground, almost prostrate on hands and knees, trembling with the force of the battle within him. He glared at the ground, giving a sound of frustration. 'No! I can stop this! I can control this! I don't HAVE to love him…This isn't right! If it wasn't something that could be controlled, it wouldn't be a sin for a male to feel for another male in this way!'

He glared at the hem of the alter cloth with an intensity that would have set fire to it. He realized with even more frustrated anger that he had stopped praying, more importantly, he had stopped praying so he could push blame someplace else! He was trying to say that his was all the boy's fault, that if Tsukasa hadn't kissed him, he would have never begun to feel this way… 'But I DID!' he shouted in his head. "I felt SOMETHING before all of this!" He whispered tightly.

He was suddenly still as he realized it. His breathing stopped, his eyes widening in horror. What he had just said…and that it was true…

His mask flickered from the sudden mass of emotions surging through him. Fear, guilt, but beneath it all…it was true…he'd felt a little strange around Tsukasa…protective…maybe….even like the others had said, he might have been a little overprotective of the boy…

What had he wanted to happen…?

A sudden memory flashed in his mind. Tsukasa in tears, huddled against him…he could remember everything of that long moment…the small cold spots left by those tears…the chill of the outside weather filling the room and turning the boy's breath to ghostly smoke…large eyes pink and filled to the brim with gushing hot liquid as the fire of his aura was burning equally hot on what little exposed skin Tomonori had….the slender stem that was his waist—it had felt so fragile and delicate and small in his arms that Tomonori had suddenly felt that someone could snap him in two, as though he were nothing more than a dried twig or a reed frozen in the winter until it snapped at the wrong angle of a harsh breeze…or perhaps even a harsh word.

But what wasn't there to protect? Anyone would protect him! …Wouldn't they! How could they ever do it from selfishness, from hoping to gain something out of it? He didn't.

Nobody had asked him to take care of Tsukasa, nobody had told him to pick up the bleeding figure in the rain those years ago. Nobody had told him to be compassionate towards the boy. He just wanted to help Tsukasa.

He hadn't wanted to be alone anymore, and he hadn't wanted someone else to die as such.

Funny. The angel was the one with the guardian.

Tomonori forced himself back to his prayers. That was why he had come there after all! To ask for guidance, to look for aid against this affliction of his soul and body and heart. Forgiveness as well…Because even he didn't know how long he had knelt there and felt this strange affection for the boy and hadn't known it to be the disease 'Love' .

'God, my Holy and Merciful Father, you know my sinful thoughts, you know all that is in my heart. You know my struggles, and my sins. You know I have betrayed you with this action…but if you are willing…you can make me clean…' He lifted his gaze, clasping his hands before him again, and staring at the suffering face. 'You can take this desire from me…'

Did he want it to be gone? To feel nothing for Tsukasa? The boy made him feel in ways that nothing else ever had…but…if it wasn't right—and it clearly wasn't—then it was his duty to try to make it go away.

But if his feelings went away, it would leave Tsukasa with nothing…and the poor boy…he deserved to have someone who could love him the way he begged to be loved…His prayer was all wrong. He was praying for the wrong things…something in his was praying 'please, give me Tsukasa…' While the rest of him shuddered in fear, revulsion at his own desires.

Would he be denied peace even by God?

'Please Lord…damn me if you must, but don't let my sin damn Tsukasa as well. he's suffered so much at my hands already, don't let him hurt because of this…he doesn't deserve any more pain…if it will save, him, then take him from me!' He gasped suddenly at what he had asked. His hands trembled. Had he really just asked God to take Tsukasa from him? No! He couldn't have! But what could he do? Ask to take it back. "but…I would like to keep him if possible…" he mumbled, tacking it on the end of his prayer hurriedly.

The longer he stared at that unchanging face, the more weary he felt. His guilt pressed heavily on him. He could feel it like a lead shroud covering and smothering him, dirtying him further in the presence of his God…

'Please have mercy on us and make us both clean again…I don't want the burden of this sin!'

But he did, didn't he? Otherwise he wouldn't have taken back his word and begged to keep Tsukasa close…

'But…" He cut himself off. He needed the boy's light to guide him. God had sent him down, a shining angel sent to be a beacon of light and hope to a despairing servant who had previously found life to be meaningless…if Tsukasa were taken away…He had nothing else. Not even his new master could keep him from being consumed by despair, despite all her cheerfulness and sunny disposition. He needed Tsukasa, and Tsukasa alone.

Yes…but that was the problem as well, wasn't it? ONLY Tsukasa. Tsukasa ALONE.

He felt himself drifting, nodding off, even on his knees as he prayed. Even with these frenzied thoughts filling his head with panic, and frustration, his body demanded rest. It turned every harsh and frenzied thought into a monster, into something unconnected and more horrible than it was…. There was no time as he prayed, hours, or minutes, or seconds were all the same, some long indescribable moments of time. Prayer took time naturally, but it also seemed to be strangely outside of it's limits if you truly did it properly. Tomonori was used to throwing himself without abandon into prayer. He really had no idea how much time he had spent there…growing every drowsier…He could see neither blue twilight nor gray dawn, the moon shone through the stained glass as the clouds veiling it parted like ripples on the water, dispersing in a wild sweep of wind, tearing them to scattered fragments and wisps of cloud.

Blue, green, red, gold, purple, white, the colors reflected onto his skin, but still he prayed blearily. 'My lord, please, I beg of you, have mercy on him. Please cleanse us and let him find someone else who will not soil him before you. Please have mercy on your lost angel, and please bring guidance to your equally lost child. Cleanse us!'

Each time he began to nod off, he caught himself. 'Lord…forgive me if I fall asleep, but you know I cannot return…not tonight. Please grant me the strength to stay awake…'

But each time he seemed to fall further, feeling his body crumpling drunkenly. His eyes gave a weary look to the face, but it seemed almost to smile as his eyelids drifted shut. "Lord…forgive…me…" he murmured as his mind faded off incoherently.

-o-O-o-

Sobs filled the room. They were all he could hear. Bitter, pained weeping, calling for him. "T-T-Tomonori-san….please…help me…!" His heart was pounding fast as he ran along the corridor. Tsukasa! Tsukasa was in trouble! Nameless, non elaborate black doors, a floor so dark it was amazing he could see anything. "Tsukasa! Where are you!" He shouted. But there was no reply but the anguished weeping, he could hear pants and whimpers of pain mingling with the pleas for help.

It was frightening how close those cries for help were to the ones he had called out in the rain those years ago…but there was greater fear in them, and he felt greater dread listening to them now.

The door at the end of the hall was wide open, blindingly white light spilled from it. "I'm coming Tsukasa!" He skidded to a halt, gaping.

The white light poured down on his fallen angel, illuminating only him, and concealing the rest of the room in thick shadow.

Tsukasa stood there, weeping, bound by chains. The glorious white feathers of his wings were streaked with blood: still-flowing blood, silently trickling from gashes at the joints of each wing. Marks from where the chains had bound him so tightly that his skin had chafed away leaving raw oozing flesh. It was disconcerting to see the bald, bleeding, chafed lines against his beautiful feathers.

But more shocking than this was the great dazzlingly white, and certainly more powerful looking wing jutting out from Tsukasa's slight shoulders, a left wing that hadn't been there before for all Tomonori knew… This new wing was harder chafed, and stained so red with blood, that it was difficult to discern that the feathers had once been white, though in places it still shone it's true and glorious white, a white so pure that it was almost translucent with the light.

Compared with this great wing of flight, the almost cute little white wings at the boy's temples seemed suddenly almost drab, their white was not nearly so pure or shining…

The blood flowed in slow melancholy oozes, it had clotted the feathers together in some places, clumps of feathers glued together by rusty scabbed putrid ichor. Tomonori wanted to gag looking at these horrible wounds--his stomach was hardly delicate by any standards of war, and yet, this threatened him with horrified nausea!

Still…Even with these horrible signs of torture, Tsukasa bore marks of his magnificent beauty. Even with this torment, Tomonori was sure that he cared for the boy.

His once rounded, cutely childish cheeks were thin and bruised, making his eyes look all the larger in his desperate, emaciated face. His long golden hair was unkept and tangled, but it still glittered like a hot stream of molten white-hot metal in a long waterfall down his back, covering him where his torn robes did not. And his eyes, though red with tears, were still the shining, deep, glass mirrors Tomonori remembered and knew far better than his own black ones. His white robes were tattered, and the skin beneath was bruised in places, but his shape was still heart-wrenchingly beautiful.

Tsukasa's hands were held above his head by the chains, great rusty iron shackles cutting into his delicate wrists, pinching his soft skin painfully, blood trickling in slow rivers from those still bound chains, but his hands were still the delicate white blossoms, even stained with rust and blood as they were. His wings were unbound—and from the looks of things, they had been bound for quite some time before this. They were drooping in exhaustion, weakly dangling, but they were still nearly as striking and lovely as ever even when they were so unkept and damaged. And ever with all the years of torture, if Tomonori were to touch the trembling wings, the feathers would be soft and silken where the blood hadn't caked them with gore.

The only movement from the poor creature, was the shuddering of his body as he sobbed. It was enough to send a pang of icy coldness straight through Tomonori's heart.

The hopelessness was tangible.

'I'm coming, Tsukasa! You're safe now! I'll get you out of here!' was what he tried to say, but it never left his voicebox. He could not speak.

Tomonori couldn't make his body move, couldn't shout to Tsukasa, call to him. He tried to desperately, but he couldn't! His desperation grew with every moment of paralysis.

He had heard of such spells…a silencing spell. Like a binding spell, but weaker, because it didn't send the nearby person to sleep, but paralyzed them, ensuring witnesses. It was mostly used by rogue groups, or guerrilla factions. Factions that wanted witnesses to bear tales of their cruelty… It took all of his iron will to keep from panicking at that thought. 'Oh God…something's going to happen to him…and I'm going to watch…oh…no…this can't be happening…'

He shielded himself in forced calm.

So… he was powerless, an unwilling witness…but to what?

There was a rustle of fabric from the shadowed portion of the room. "I will ask you again as I have many times before, archangel Israfel. Perhaps today is the day that you will tell me? Hmm? Ah, no matter…I grow tired of your squeamishness. Answer me: HOW did you break free from me? No soldier has yet broken free of my grasp. How have YOU done such a thing!" Tsukasa's eyes closed, wet lashes fanning dark gold against his skin. Tears snaked beneath them as he continued crying, sagging against the chains.

"I-I T-T-Told you. I-I D-D-Don't know!" He lifted his head ahead of him to the shadows. Facing forward as though only he could see who spoke to him, then he let his head drop again, panting through his sobs. The chains hung taut under his small weight, and trembled as he wept exhaustedly, his body shaking.

There was a noise of irritation from the shadows. Tsukasa lifted eyes haunted by guilt, tears streamed from them washing away the grime streaking his face. "Please…let me die!" Tsukasa begged to the unseen form in the impossibly black shadows. There was desperation in his voice. "I don't want to hurt anyone anymore! Please!" He was cut off by a flash of white, and the echo of a slap. Tsukasa's head jerked, sending his long blond hair flying. He collapsed as though boneless from the blow. The chains rattled as he reeled. He swung lazily back on the chains, like a drunken pendulum. He gasped air, His tears spilling without end even as a livid welt began to rise against one of his thin cheeks. His large eyes stared out with fright, trying to hide himself, to protect himself. His hands fought against the chains weakly. He seemed fragile as spun glass. So much more vulnerable than ever before.

Anger rose in the paralyzed observer as he stared powerlessly at the unseen creature harming the one he cared for more than anything else.

"How dare you accuse me!" Came the voice, low and dangerous, a hissed whisper. There was a rustle of cloth, like the bearer of the sinister voice was pacing.
Tomonori's chest gave another sharp stab of pain.

His mind screamed in anger, rage consumed him, but still, he could not move. Powerless!

A large, slender, elegant hand slipped from the shadows, stroking Tsukasa's tearstreaked face in mock tenderness with liquid motions. Tomonori felt a raging blast of anger and a hint of jealousy, but he forced it back down to make way for fear. Tsukasa was in danger and in pain and all he could do was sit there! All he could do…was watch. Watch and dread the fate of the fallen angel he cared for so much…

Tsukasa obviously didn't enjoy this touch, he shrank back from it. He whimpered, sobbing in fearful uncontrollable gasps of air. "Poor little wingless Israfel. Will you not tell me how you slipped past my control? How you continue to evade it even now?" The tone was almost sickeningly sweet, the politeness obviously concealing something far worse…

Tsukasa's face scrunched into such a look of pain, of distressed hopelessness, that Tomonori's hands fought all the harder to stretch forward an embrace him, to shield him with his own body .

He had to rescue him! He couldn't just stand here and watch him get hurt! He couldn't move still! This was torture! To watch Tsukasa be hurt, and then stand by, unable to do anything…it was unbearable! What was going to happen to him as he was trapped, watching?

"Perhaps I'm being too kind…" Murmured the voice darkly. It was lowered to a whisper again, and dripped with arrogance and contempt. "Rayyu. Give him an incentive, will you? No…not you…No…It will not serve to have you partake of his blood just yet…" There was the shuffle of footsteps. The voice sounded impatient, irritated…and yet distracted…

Tomonori's heart burned with horror, rage, and fear with every exhausted sob from Tsukasa. He had to do something but couldn't, he tried to reach the boy but couldn't.

"Lafayel. You would be better at this…will you show him what happens to those who disobey Azrael's commands?" There was cruel approval in the voice. At this word, into the light stepped the boy Tomonori remembered attacking Tsukasa last spring. But… he was dead, wasn't he? How could he be here?

He was shrouded by a plain white robe rather than bandages and a tattered cloak, but there was no mistaking the black wings, and the bobbed, pale hair just shy of the shade of white, his ghostly almost washed-out seeming gray eyes, too pale a shade to be human. Strange eraser eyes, cold as ice, and the same color—not blue, but cold clear gray, faceted and crackling in just the same fashion as ice would, with dark gray circling the edges like deep, dark, cold frozen lakes in winter. Deep water that would swallow you up when the thinnest layer of ice cracked and take your life in an instant. Those eyes had no room for pity, no shred of remorse…

They weren't the kind you would forget easily, either.

Tsukasa wept all the harder, pleading. "No…please…" He whispered, chains jingling as he tried to back away from Lafayel. Tomonori's heart leapt into his throat, his body tensing, and yet, not following even his desire to tense and coil his muscles like a spring to better strike when the time came. Where was his careful training? Where was his quick mind? He had nothing…he was weak…weak and powerless!

Lafayel's face was quite expressive as he stared at Tsukasa with disgust. "All you have to do is obey, you fool! How hard could this be!" Hissed the other eraser back to him with narrowed eyes, pitiless blades of razor ice. "Quit playing the saint!" He whispered hoarsely.

Tsukasa shook his head. His eyes darting frightenedly from Lafayel to the unseen eraser in the shadows.

"No, NO! You don't understand! I don't know what happened to me! Please! Just let me go! Let me die!" His desperate pleas went up in a thin wail, even as he sobbed them out. "You betrayed me!" came the voice from the shadows in a screech. "You've broken free, you'll never return to us! Lafayel!" The voice had become angry, sharp. Lafayel's face was contorted by a strange expression of fascinated, disgusted enjoyment. His lips curved up into a smirk that could have frozen hearts, that would have identified any character in a play as the villain, he smirked this wicked malicious expression as his hands reached back to Tsukasa's remaining wing. "No! NO! Please! don't…" Tsukasa whimpered, suddenly panting in terror.

There was a sharp crack, and Tsukasa screamed with every shred of oxygen in his lungs. "Oops, that's what you get, traitor. That's what you get for betraying Lord Azrael like that…" Lafayel's smirk curled his lips upward, he looked positively demonic, filled with sadistic pleasure at Tsukasa's pain.

Tomonori would have screamed too, in rage. He would have flown forward and killed the one who hurt Tsukasa… except that something was holding back his voice, holding back his limbs... He cursed wildly in his mind at the one who had cast the silencing spell, praying that Tsukasa would still be alive by this twisted game's end, praying desperately that he could still run forward and protect him, or better yet, kill the twisted creature who had trapped him and hurt Tsukasa so mercilessly!

'He's got amnesia you bastard! He can't remember anything! Let him go, Damn you! LET HIM GO!' Tomonori wanted to shout at him, but he couldn't…

Tsukasa's eyes rolled in terror, in pain, his whimpering gasps for breath making Tomonori's throat hurt just hearing it's raggedness. He struggled all the harder to break this spell.

"TELL ME!" Demanded the voice. "I-I-I C-Can't!" Tsukasa whimpered, gasping for breath, his wing hanging at an awkward angle, broken, snapped. He gasped in pain. "You have to believe me! I don't know anything! Oh please! Just let me die! Have mercy!" He sobbed. There was a suddenly almost insanely hysterical laugh from the shadows "You must be joking! If you want mercy, you should betray someone so weak as to give it…You should have betrayed my dear rainless buffoon of a brother, Michael, or his pet Gabriel, not myself. You fool…poor saintly, kindly fool…I don't tolerate your brainless acts of mercy. Up here in the world of WAR, we call that treason. Lafayel, continue!"

Tomonori struggled with all his might to move forward, to save him. This had to be a nightmare! He could feel tears in his eyes—though he knew they would never fall. His heart was tearing itself to pieces for Tsukasa. He had to run! Had to save him! 'Tsukasa!'. Lafayel's clawed hand moved to one of the wings on Tsukasa's head. His eyes alight with a sinister enjoyment and mingled revulsion—likely at the fact that he had to touch the object of his disdain.

Another snap, another terrible soul rending scream. Another wing, broken. Another mental shout from Tomonori that again would never break from his throat, this one filled with curses against the person who could do this to Tsukasa. "Master…I could tear away his other wing, that would break him, oh master, could I?" Lafayel's eagerness made Tomonori feel violently sick to his stomach. 'Oh God…Tsukasa…'

"No!" Said the voice harshly, making Lafayel recoil "Let him keep his pathetic wings, without them we could not hurt him so…after all they're far more sensitive even than yours, Lafayel due to the unique structure…they will be a fitting torment, a fitting curse. Calm your lust for pain, save it for the humans." Lafayel gave a nod that could have been a bow "Understood." The creature unseen in the shadows made a movement, sending fabric rustling.

"You heard that, Israfel. You can make all this pain stop right now…if you just tell me…For the last time, TELL ME YOUR SECRET ISRAFEL!" Tsukasa was flung back as though by an invisible hand. He gasped, then screamed "Oh! No! Get out!…Get out of my head!" He shouted, struggling against his chains, pressing his hands to his temples, his head. His eyes rolled back into his head making him look almost possessed.

His voice was desperate. "It's not there! I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED!" He screamed at his captors, tears gushing from his eyes. His wings, broken as they were, spread wide "GET OUT!" Tsukasa screamed. There was a hiss from the shadows, and a clattering noise as though the creature Azrael had been physically thrown back. Lafayel's head shot to the shadows. His eyes widened marginally before they narrowed to slits. "You worthless little bitch! How dare you!" He shouted "How dare you cast away Lord Azrael! I'LL KILL YOU!"

Tomonori tried to leap, to lunge as Lafayel's hands fastened around Tsukasa's throat. He wanted to give a shout of rage, of fear, of shock, but he was still captive to the spell that held him immobile and hostage.

Tsukasa's eyes went wide, bulging, he choked. His small hands fought the chains to free his throat, then suddenly a strange light filled his eyes, and he stopped struggling, his eyes filled with a frightening emotion as they stared into Lafayel's…and emotion of contentment….

"ENOUGH!" Azrael roared in the shadows. Lafayel was flung back without touch. His eyes widened, then he glared into the shadows. Tsukasa coughed weakly, sucking in air, sagging and pulling his chains taut above him. Lafayel glared at the shadows, his face filled with a rage that would have terrified anyone. "I've put up with his arrogant, saintly, prissy, stuck-up ways long enough! Let me kill him master! I beg you to let me kill him!" Tsukasa's face relaxed. A soft smile appeared on his face, relief. "Oh…please… Kill me…yes…please kill me…" He whispered, as though the words were delicious on his lips.

Tomonori trembled. This couldn't be Tsukasa…this couldn't be his friend so hopeless and so broken as to beg for death. 'what have I done? I must have let this happen somehow…Oh God…'

Azrael growled "Not NOW Lafayel. Remember your place you fool! This is high heaven! Behave like an angel, not a demon! No angel may ever spill the life's blood of another angel lest they be cast down under the burning sun, remember!" Lafayel stiffened, but lowered his head "Yes…as you say, master." He growled through bared teeth. "Good." Lafayel turned back to Tsukasa, hiding his face from the invisible angel in the shadows. "Because…" Azrael began slowly, allowing a hint of enjoyment to creep into his chilling voice, He lowered it to a silken, almost dangerously sweetened whisper, "The instant you let your bloodlust get the better of you…I'll cast you down to the blue planet and you will never rejoin my service ever…Your dust will mingle with the dust of humans, and you will be branded with the mark of the fallen, for all of our kind to see…do I make myself clear?" Lafayel's face paled, his wings gave the faintest trembling. "Yes, master." He mumbled. "Good." Azrael said silkily. "Continue our…interrogation, then." Tsukasa's face fell into fear and grief. "…N-no…please…!"

Tomonori struggled all the harder to get free, to tear Lafayel's cruel hands away from Tsukasa's delicate wings, but he was still bound by invisible strings, his voice sealed. He tried to close his eyes, and not look, but the vision of Tsukasa trembling in pain, exhaustion, weeping, seemed to emblazon itself through his very eyelids. He couldn't escape this! And he hated himself for wanting to. Tsukasa would still be in trouble even if he COULD escape! How could he ever even think of leaving! He had to save Tsukasa!

His powers were no aid, he couldn't even feel them. They had been sealed away. He felt so useless, so terrible for letting this happen…

He saw Lafayel's hand tighten at the base of the remaining unbroken wing. Tsukasa sobbed wretchedly, "no…NO! Please! Don't! Stop! Please! Master! Please don't let him-just let him kill me! MASTER!" He screamed, fighting to get away from Lafayel, his chains rattling. Lafayel tightened his hold until Tsukasa was whimpering in pain, gasping for breath, falling to his knees, blood seeping from underneath the shackles, where the iron had cut into his flesh.

"Shut up, or you'll have three times the normal number of bones in your body." Lafayel hissed, his eyes narrowed in absolute hatred.

The unseen voice echoed out again. "This is the last chance I will give you. Tell me how you broke my hold on you, tell me why you allowed yourself to LOSE YOUR WING! Tell me why you were bested by a mere HUMAN!" Tsukasa's tearstreaked face lifted, he babbled desperately, "I've told you! Everything I know! He…He was a demon! I-I've never seen such a strong evil aura! He was more powerful than anything and he was mindbreaked…and…I…I don't know! Please, kill me! Just let me die! I don't want to kill anything anymore! Oh…my chest…my chest is going to explode! I'm burning!…that girl…she's calling to me…she's crying…I can feel it…Master!" His eyes suddenly filled with even greater dread, He lifted his hands desperately to the creature in the shadows. "Master! Master have mercy, I beg you! Make her stop!…Oh…Oh! What did you do to me! No…I didn't want to kill them! No! Stop it! I can feel you crying! STOP! PLEASE!" He screamed, clutching the sides of his head. Lafayel took a step back "You're mad! There's nobody here Israfel! There is no girl! Israfel!" He slapped Tsukasa's face. Tsukasa stopped screaming and trembled, whimpering. His eyes were hollow as he lifted them to Lafayel "Why…why is she doing this to me? Why won't she let me follow Lord Azrael! Master! Help me! Please! Make her stop!" he cried out pitifully, staring beseechingly at the shadows

Tomonori's skin crawled Girl? Crying? Could this be…'Kirihara!' Why would she be doing this to Tsukasa? Had he been kidnapped? Were these people holding him captive and was Kirihara trying to get him back? Then why did Tsukasa have three wings now instead of two? Was this…the past? TSUKASA'S PAST?

"SILENCE" Tsukasa's voice faded, down to a thin whimper sobbing with choked pain. "My wings…" He said, his eyes glazed with pain. "They're covered…covered in blood…oh…what have I done?"

"I DEMAND YOUR SILENCE! OBEY ME!"

Tsukasa shook his head, weeping. "I…I can't! I can't! I want to, but I can't! I don't know what's happened to me!" He cried out so brokenly that Tomonori was sure that he had to be trying with all of his soul to do what had been demanded of him. Lafayel's teeth were exposed in a viscous snarl of contempt. Tomonori looked at him in that instant and utterly hated him, for hurting Tsukasa, for looking down at him like that…

There was a feral snarl that would have put Lafayel's to shame. echoing in the shadows and another slap echoed out. Tsukasa flew back, swinging back and forth again. Lafayel had pulled his hand away from the other's wings and was now observing the sickening pendulum swinging on the taut chains. Slumped against his chains, blood flowing and staining his sleeves, his entire body wracked with agonized sobs… "Lafayel, stand away! Come! Rayyu! Heal this traitorous scum. I want him to be ready to try to tell me again tomorrow."

Tsukasa went rigid as a corpse, his eyes wide with terror, with horror. "No…No, please! Just take them away from me!" His whole body shook from his tears. His chains rattled as his tiny hands gestured entreatingly into the shadows. His sobs were so violent that he could barely make out Tsukasa's pleas. "I-I-I d-don't w-w-want wings c-c-covered in blood! Pl-Please M-Master! Have mercy! M-Mercy!" He shouted into the shadows. "Don't leave me with her! I can't watch her cry again! Those eyes…!" He was trembling violently "I'll go mad if you leave me here! Please!"

"You know why you killed those humans Israfel." Whispered Lafayel, his face contorted in disgust. His face curved into a purely evil smile that was all but an excuse to display teeth.

"You killed them because you are a heartless, cruel, murderous angel! There's nothing left in you but evilness, it's only your sick twisted little mind that lets you think that you're doing something good by resisting Master's commands! You spilled their worthless human blood because you ENJOYED it! You're a monster…and you're insane!"

"NOOO!" Tsukasa screamed in a desolate wail. Hands grasped his broken wings. "NO! Let me go! I didn't want to kill them! I never wanted to hurt anyone! Let me die! Cast me down to earth! Cut away my wings and make me one of the fallen angels! Cast me down for any sin you'd like! Anything! You could even say that I've fallen due to one of the daughters of men! If you must, let me die with the humans I've made suffer! Cut off ALL my wings! ANYTHING, but please, have mercy! Let me go! Oh please let me go! Please! No! Let me go! Master! MASTER!" His chains rattled with his frenzied struggles as he wept hysterically, bloody wings staining his already torn robes. He tried to run forward to throw himself at the hidden figure's feet, but was cast back by the chains. His hands outstretched "Master! Oh please Master! Don't leave me here with her!"

"How DARE you call me that…! Worthless worm! …Rayyu, let him suffer, you can heal him tomorrow…for now let him ROT in his pain and self pity and DISGUSTING self praise…You fool, Israfel, you fool. None can resist and live. You'll die soon enough for your treason…you'll get your wish." There was a sudden harsh rasp of laughter, a brief cold chuckle that was entirely humorless "And with your dying breath, your corpse will be displayed before the regiment and we will kill humans under a banner of war for what they have dared to do to an archangel, daring to tear away his wings and torture him so severely…Ah, you think you've won by defying me now…you are so loved for your kindness you pathetic former servant of mine, you could have been my greatest, you could have ruled heaven at my side! Your followers will easily forget their own kindness once they see your body!…Even when you are dead and cast outside the ship to your grave, others will kill in your name! You dare ask me for mercy? I show you mercy now! You will be dead for the worst of your punishment! Be grateful that I allow you to take your death so sweetly!" The voice bore no trace of pity, a cold lethal enjoyment in the chilling words.

Maliciousness crept through Azrael's aura, through his words as Tsukasa begged all the louder and Lafayel moved back, staring with disgust at him. He suddenly grabbed Tsukasa's throat as though he could stand him no longer. The tortured, deformed angel's eyes widened, gasping pitifully for breath. Lafayel moved his sneering face close so he could whisper angrily to the choking boy.

"You could never be a saint, so stop trying to be one…wretch. At least die with some shred of your glory intact! Die in battle!" Tsukasa's hands, bloodied with struggle, reached out, grabbing a fistful of Lafayel's robes in each hand. Lafayel's eyes bulged as he let go of Tsukasa's throat in shock. Tsukasa gasped for breath, fresh tears coursing down his cheeks "Oh Lafayel…Lafayel, please…let me die! I can't live like this…I can feel her…as though her heart beats with mine! I can see their bodies! Please…end my suffering…have mercy on me, oh Lafayel…please! I beg you!" Tomonori stared, unbelieving all that he was seeing. This was such a strange dream…too real…too vivid!

Tsukasa went on in a frenzied desperate babble "Just let me stop suffering, let me repay those innocent children! Let me repay, please! If master won't have pity on me…will you?…please?…kill… me…? Just tighten this hand around my throat? Let me die?" His eyes were beseeching, filled with almost insane desperation. His hand suddenly took Lafayel's and placed it at his throat. The other angel was pale, his hand faintly trembled. Lafayel's eyelids closed, then his face contorted, and he shuddered. He took his hand away from Tsukasa's throat, it was shaking violently now, and his whole face had suddenly paled more starkly. He swallowed and spoke, his hand was still trembling as he seemed to try to wipe it clean on his robes, scrubbing at it jerkily. "You'll die…" His voice wavered, trembling with an emotion that could have been rage, or horror, or fear, "You'll die soon enough…" His voice was quieter, a flash of emotion crossed his face, was it… disgust? horror?…pity? It fled in a bare instant, too quickly to read accurately, replaced by rage " You'll DIE,TRAITOR. Your filthy hands defile with their sins and wickedness…release me!" He pulled his robes free, expression filled with haughty, disdainful disgust. "Unlike YOU I follow my master's orders. How dare you ask me for mercy! You'll die when he tells you to! At least follow his orders that once! Leave me alone! Don't pull me into this mad suicide of yours! Let me go!" He said, with a look of sudden terror and anger, he backed away fearfully "You're mad…You're insane! L-l-leave me out of this!" He managed to spit at Tsukasa's feet to show disdain, but instead he looked terrified. He quickly disappeared into the shadows, almost fleeing.

Tsukasa's chains held him back as he cried out wordlessly in anguish, fingers stretching to reach the door. "Forgive me master! Please!"

"Never." Came the hollow response—another voice, neither the twisted 'master' Azrael, or Lafayel. This voice was saddened, and shaken. "He'll never forgive…Oh Israfel!…You have fallen…I couldn't believe it, I wouldn't believe it…but now I see it…Dear Israfel you've gone mad!" Tsukasa's eyes filled with tears at this more than anything else "No…" he whispered. There was a worse more terrified pleading in him now. "N-No Rayyu! RAYYU! Rayyu please! Please! You can't leave me! Please! Don't leave me here!" There was only a sad sounding sigh, and the shutting of a door. "No…" Tsukasa whispered, clutching his wings. "No…" He whimpered.

"NOOOO!" he screamed.

The chains from the ceiling loosened. He ran from the pedestal, stumbling and tearing the hem of his robes. He ran to the door, and flung himself at it. It was locked, he hammered it with his fists "Let me go! Please! Master! Rayyu! Lafayel! ANYBODY! Dubbiel! Lord Michael! Hadarniel! Jophiel! Gabriel! Somebody please! Have mercy! Oh God, please let me die or let me go! Please don't leave me here! Don't leave me here!" He gradually stopped pounding, and collapsed. "No…No, please stop! Please! I'm sorry! I didn't want to hurt you so! Oh please…Please little girl….forgive me…oh God please forgive me!" He broke down into more hysteric sobs, his chains making dull clinking noises over the floor. "I WANT TO DIE!" He screamed, pulling his hands over his ears as though to shut out the voice.

Tomonori felt himself being pulled down the hall as though the floor was moving under him, the room streaming light. His legs felt encased in lead as he tried to take steps back in and save Tsukasa, the angel breaking down into wretched broken sobs once again, his broken wings twitching weakly to try to hide him. "Oh God of all Heaven, have mercy! Take this life from me!" He screamed the plea as he held his bleeding hands up to the ceiling. "Ts…" Tomonori whispered almost inaudibly, now no longer in the room. "Tsu…ka…sa…" He whispered with effort, straining to move forward and shield Tsukasa. To protect him. 'I won't leave you! I'll stay here with you! I can help you! Oh Tsukasa!' But he was moving back far too fast. The doors were slamming all around him in a deafening noise.

He could hear the screams of agony from each door as it did so, adding to the din. He lifted arms encased in cement to block out the sound, but it was just as hard as moving forward to get back to Tsukasa. It seemed to become easier to run with each step he made, but the floor was spinning backwards so hard now, that he was still moving backwards even as he ran with all his strength. His footsteps gained in speed, until he was running flat out in a sprint, top speed, trying to gain some distance with this moving floor.

"TSUKASA!" He shouted, hoping to somehow reassure him, even as he found it becoming impossible to reach him. Tsukasa's screams and wails echoed down the halls, mingling with the shouts and cries from the empty doorways… "Have mercy!" The angel cried "Oh please! Please have mercy!" he pleaded amidst the screams. The other cries and wails almost seemed to mock and mimic him "Mercy! Mercy!" they cried. "MURDERER!" Cried others. Tomonori ran faster, trying vainly to gain some forward motion to get to that ever fading door where Tsukasa was.

Doors screamed, drowning him out, blinding him with their own bright lights from within..

He tripped, fell, and the floor lurched backwards, spinning past doors so fast they were blurs of light and deafening horrifying sounds. "Help me!" Tsukasa's voice screamed

He was reaching the other end of the hall! There was fire, and the screams were all the worse over here…

…burning…the demons dancing in the fires…

He scrambled to escape, even as the floor ended and he found himself flying through the air, towards the burning house he had seen in so many nightmares before…

He pulled himself into a ball, squeezing his eyes shut tight, bracing himself.

Heat flashed even from that distance over his skin.

He heard a scream he recognized. TSUKASA!

He could feel Tsukasa trapped within that house, screaming as he had been in that room...chained within that burning place of terror and madness…dying…

And with that, he himself, cried out as the flames roared up to meet him body whipping around sickeningly in the air…

Falling…falling to earth a burning hopeless wreak…

Falling…

Suddenly there was no house, no fire, only an empty street and the thunder of rain…and it was coming closer and closer and closer AND…

-o-O-o-

He looked over the table and he wondered what on earth he had been thinking. The nightmare that had so driven away any hope of sleep he might have had, only made him edgy now. It had seemed so clear. That some of the things in Tsukasa's past, like the first of his scars actually made sense. But now the moment of lucidity had only brought forth more questions that he could not answer He was running on the edge of exhaustion, the only thing that was keeping him awake was caffeine and adrenaline born of fear. He KNEW he had heard of Azrael somewhere. He KNEW that he had never dreamt such a thing about Tsukasa before…him in battle, yes. Him losing in battle, yes. Him dying in battle, yes. Each exquisitely painful in its own right, with a million dying beautiful angel martyrs of their own… But the battles had all been more…earthly…not this ethereal torture scene…and those names…some seemed familiar…some seemed strange…but they certainly weren't his making, that much he was sure of.

Something strange was going on, something that Tomonori couldn't explain.

He moved his hands dreamily to try to put away the cluttered papers and books he had been using to research the name he had half recognized. Tsukasa's small hands stopped him though. He was too tired to fight back against the hands that clasped his wrists, only noticing through his disfocused haze that Tsukasa's hands were uncommonly smooth on the palms…like they had been burned that way…which was entirely likely knowing his powers…but had Tsukasa even used his powers recently? Had he battled? Was he alright? Tomonori's worry awoke even in his groggy, cramped, more impatient brain. It was enough to at least wake him up nominally.

"No." Tsukasa said firmly, pushing his hands away "You shouldn't do anything else…oh Tomonori-san, did you get ANY sleep last night?" His tone was incredulous. His eyes looked even bigger than normal. 'And no wonder…he probably thinks I've lost my mind.' Tomonori thought to himself with grim and tired amusement. His eyes ached from lack of sleep, his body felt as though his bones had turned to lead. But… any sleep last night…an answer…he needed to answer…

Tsukasa's screams over his broken wings, his pleas of 'have mercy master!' echoed in his mind. His body gave a shudder so strong he couldn't even try to hold it back. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so powerless and ill at the content of his dreams. He felt sick just remembering it. Remembering that exquisitely beautiful creature being hurt like that, and him being unable to stop and do anything but watch and silently rage…

"A little." He murmured, trying to remain honest and not worry Tsukasa. He HAD gotten a little sleep, restless and disturbing though it had been. Tsukasa's eyes were still wide, astonished, even shocked to find him here, all through the night he must have stayed awake without even knowing it…who knew when he had woken up from the dream—the gray of dawn hadn't even touched the sky when he had run home to see if Tsukasa was safe.

The sight of the young boy sleeping peacefully, mumbling softly into Tomonori's pillow had let him relax for a single exquisite moment…A strange moment of longing to curl up beside the boy…then his reason and curiosity and worry had awoken and called him to this place until now.…

He massaged his forehead, pinching the bridge of his nose where a slightly dizzy halfhearted headache was starting. 'Can I tell him what I dreamed? Will he be scared, shocked? What If I'm developing powers I didn't know about, and I accidentally reached out into something private in his mind? What will he think of me then?'

Each faction had it's own special areas of expertise…EGO for instance, was better at controlling things in the mind—many mindbreakers had once belonged to EGO. Tomonori's own faction, WIZ-DOM was known more for it's ability to sense minute inflections in a psychic's aura, though Tomonori himself had never seemed to develop much of this talent at all. It had depressed him at first. But there had been others in the orphanage who had been exceptionally gifted in those areas, and none of them had lived as long as he had…

Nonetheless, he was still past due for some of his adult powers to awaken. He had greater results for his little power, but he still had comparatively little power compared to more normal WIZ-DOM members. He'd thought that he was simply born of weaker stock, and therefore wouldn't reap the benefits of being full blooded WIZ-DOM…Technically only his father, the missionary, was WIZ-DOM. His mother had been a normal human from what he could remember…at least his reasoning was: if she had been a psychic, she wouldn't have…died…so quickly… But it was possible that perhaps he was tapping into some powers he did not know of before this…perhaps this was what it was like to read auras so deeply like most of his faction had been able to do all their lives? Maybe the reason why this was so shocking was because of the suddenness of the power's awakening? Perhaps Kirihara had awakened it unconsciously…or…He swallowed, controlling his expression.

Perhaps Tsukasa had awakened it…That strange bubbling heat in his chest…

He felt again that faint weight in his arms. The feeling of wanting to give something…but what? 'To give…what is it that I wanted to give?'

A voice snapped him back to his senses. "Tomonori-san, you can't go to school like this, you're barely awake." Tsukasa's voice was soft, his eyes huge and concerned, still shocked at why Tomonori might do this to himself. The man avoided looking into the hypnotic orbs. There was a sudden flash of memory, as scream. Tomonori fought the urge to shudder.

He sighed to himself. Maybe he was barely awake, but the residual caffeine alone wouldn't give him very good sleep…'I don't want to embarrass him' There was a sudden warmth at his shoulders as he completed this thought. His stomach clenched suddenly. He controlled his urge to stiffen, and his urge to blush. He looked with aching eyes at the boy beside him. His heart softened, at the look of concern on his gentle beautiful face. Such open goodwill and kindness… Tomonori was amazed at the calmness he felt as he spoke back. "No, I have a test today…I have to be there." He smiled sadly at that. He really DID need to be there. If he missed too much school, he could lose his job, and since he was the only income in their little 'family' he had to keep his job to care for Tsukasa. 'Dear Tsukasa…' He felt his hand shift to touch one of the two Tsukasa had on his shoulders. 'thank you…'

He was less surprised at his own boldness as he was at Tsukasa's reaction, blushing and pulling away. Tomonori blinked 'that was interesting…did I do something wrong? Hmm…maybe I was right, maybe he really doesn't feel as deeply as he thinks he does…' Strangely enough, something seemed to sink in him at that thought…but it should have been a good thing, right? He wouldn't have to worry about these inappropriate things happening any longer…

So why did this make him feel so upset? He hoped it was just the lack of sleep, his foggy brain, his aching eyes and limbs, the dreamy sort of incoherence his mind had turned into.

There was a frustrated sigh "But Tomonori-san-"

Tomonori interrupted him, feeling his own temper flash beneath the surface. 'Hmph. He really wants me to stay home…' He had a sudden very strange vision of Tsukasa in a nurse's costume. He swallowed hard, suddenly uncomfortably and fully awake. 'Where the HELL did that come from!' he thought to himself alarmedly. His mental word choice only alarmed him even more. 'I have to end this quickly, before these feelings start to affect what I let him do.' He was thinking not only of his desire to go to sleep, but also of the strange tingling he felt in the pit of his stomach at the boy's touch and concern…

"I'm going, Tsukasa." His eyes narrowed. 'I have to at least let him know that I'm serious…but…' His attempted glare softened. 'I can't let him misunderstand and think I'm angry…oh this has become so complicated…' He was nervous now. What if he hadn't softened the glare in time? What if he'd upset Tsukasa by his mask's groggy dulling of it's compliance to his needs?

Tsukasa's eyes were still wide, worried, concerned. Tomonori almost smiled. Tsukasa was trying to take care of him…it was touching. He didn't even know what had happened, and he was trying to help. 'He's very sweet…' he thought to himself fondly.

He realized the warm feelings these thoughts brought him, and he forced them back to sharpness and discipline '…but that doesn't give me the privilege to ignore everything I know is right and feel this way for him. I've got to keep better control over myself! Wanting to help him is one thing, worrying for him is another, but I MUST not let myself feel like this. It's wrong! I can't do this! I can't let him feel this way!'

He noticed that Tsukasa's cheeks were faintly flushed. He internally sighed. 'what am I doing to him right now?' He wondered. 'Maybe that's why he drew away, I've been telling him it's wrong, and then I suddenly seem to break down like that and show inappropriate affection? He must assume that I don't mean it…it must hurt him all the more when I do that to him…when I lie and say it means nothing, but do it anyway…'

"But…you're so tired…" Tsukasa whispered. He looked almost as though he himself were in pain. Tomonori's chest gave an ache. 'My dear Tsukasa, if only you weren't so empathetic to me…I don't deserve your care…and you certainly don't deserve to suffer because of my mistakes.' Tomonori thought to himself sadly. "I'll be fine Tsukasa."

Of course he would. He would MAKE himself alright if it would make Tsukasa stop worrying for him with such a painful expression…he didn't like it when Tsukasa worried

He saw the boy swallow, and suddenly look at his hands as though ashamed. He felt a bit of relief watching him. 'Thank you for not trying to argue with me…I don't want to hurt you by disagreeing…if it would make you happy, I would stay home, but I just can't. Even for your sake. Too much else depends on today for me to give it up to you. And it's your senior year…you mustn't miss school to care for me, you need that day of classes.'

Tomonori mentally thought all of this to Tsukasa as though he could somehow read it, as thought Tsukasa could somehow receive it—But he would never say it… To say it would be to admit that he loved him, and to admit that would be the end of them both. It would ruin Tsukasa to be put in such a socially unacceptable relationship, and it would ruin Tomonori, his title as a preist, as a member of wiz-dom…fraternizing—if that was the proper word he could use—with the enemy…an eraser. It might not only mean his disgrace, but Tsukasa's death. 'We can't.' he thought to himself, as though to remind him to distance himself.

Tsukasa's cheeks darkened once more. Tomonori wondered to himself in curiosity. 'What is he thinking about?' Could he dare presume to be the cause of that blush. His heart twisted as Tsukasa's face suddenly and silently became pained, hurt. It was this—as much as it hurt him to admit it—that convinced him that Tsukasa was indeed thinking about him.

…Something beautiful and awe-inspiring followed by a look of having been crushed, having his heart broken. It could only be what he had done. Tomonori felt upset just thinking about it. Guilty even…even though for all he knew he had done the right and the necessary thing… 'I wish I could apologize to you…but I can't…even I would break down and turn it into a confession. I'm sorry Tsukasa, but it has to be this way. If you can look at me with that hurt, it at least means that you are safe, protected from me…I'd spoil you…don't you understand that? This would ruin us both!' Why did he keep on justifying his hurting the boy…he had to wonder? He felt a stab of guilt, of remorse, but he didn't let it show.

Tsukasa's eyes lifted, too open and innocent to hide his unhappiness. "But Tomonori-san…" He murmured, trailing off, his gentle fingers touching a shoulder, then drawing back as though he realized he was treading over a line. Tomonori let out a long sigh. His shoulder tingled where Tsukasa had touched it, he forced his face to remain calm since otherwise he was sure he would have started to blush. 'how can I convince you that I'm not worth this? That I'm not worth you? I can't can I? Because you love me, I can't convince you not to do it…how could you be so blind, Tsukasa?' For a horrible sickening moment, Tsukasa's face filled with distress, and Tomonori panicked. Had he said that out loud! No…it must be unrelated. He hadn't said it…he was safe… He felt his lips tug into a bit of a smile. He was relieved once again. He could barely remember what he had said and what he hadn't said sometimes. 'don't let me make you upset…' He wasn't sure what that thought was. Just another unsaid request? A reminder to himself? A prayer? He didn't know.

"Tsukasa, I don't call in sick days just because I stayed up all night doing something…" He paused. How to say what he was doing? What he was looking for? Evidence that Azrael couldn't possibly have any relation to the perfect, beautiful, white winged creature he so adored…?

"…Something rather stupid now that I think about it." His lips curved into a wry smile. He could only hope that it was stupid, that it was meaningless that there was no chance at all that Tsukasa could know this 'Azrael' or…

He tensed behind the mask of amusement. Or dare to call that being who was willing to torment him so cruelly, the same word he had used on Kirihara. Master. 'I hope for your sake you haven't been mindbreaked so viscously…my precious angel…I hope you've never been hurt so badly…'

If he had though… He swallowed. If Tsukasa had been mindbreaked to that vile creature…his young charge could very well have lost his mind, or at least some of the sense to make good choices…and…maybe…that was why Tsukasa felt for him so…strongly…

But that would be a good thing right? If Tsukasa really was very normal, if he could be cured of this horrible happening in his past…if he could find someone who would truly make him happy…that would be good wouldn't it? He would be happy…

'But…I love him…'

That was why he hoped he was wrong…because he so selfishly wanted what he could not have. Because his mental explanation to Tsukasa of why they couldn't do something like this, was just as much a shout to himself to stop thinking about it, that it would be worse than suicide to tell Tsukasa the truth, that it might mean the boy's death! And some horrible part of him didn't care…just wanted and needed…and in his mind only lust could produce tears of frustration. Love wouldn't behave like this. He couldn't possibly love Tsukasa. He knew to his very bones that he wasn't good enough, and therefore it wouldn't work. He had to know better. 'I can't do this to him! I can see it so clearly now…it wouldn't be him who leads us to ruin, it would be me…because I would acknowledge what he's doing…because I would…want him to love me, and would love him in return…if I ever could at least. I would be the one who would ruin us…not him…'

"I'll deal with the consequences. Don't worry about me." He said out loud to Tsukasa.

'Yes…I'll have to deal with these consequences or we'll both suffer. And if you worry about me…it only makes me want to stop you from worrying about me. It makes me want to give in, if only because I don't want to see you so unhappy every time I have to reject you and lie, and say that you are only a son to me. Please stop worrying…please…make this easy for me…' But he knew it would never be easy…

"But…But, Tomonori-san…" Tsukasa whispered.

Tomonori's chest was filled with an aching warmth, touched by Tsukasa's care for him, grieved by how he would have to be sharp to him, how he would have to disagree with him. 'I'm arguing against him after all!' he snapped at himself. 'of course I need to disagree. If I don't, He'll make me stay home and…I just need to get away from him for now.' He looked up at Tsukasa, he felt a little less drowsy now, just more weary than anything else. "I have to go." He said firmly to the boy. 'I can't stay here now, if I'm in the house with you alone I…I don't know what I might do to hurt you…I don't want to hurt you anymore, not like this. That dream…it showed me this if nothing else, I can't see you in pain and not feel this way…and I can't feel this way for you…' He quickly thought to himself about what he had to do at school today.

If he had been anyone else his eyes might have widened 'oh, wonderful. I sure picked a good day to pull an all-nighter…' he thought to himself bitterly. "My fifth period class has test reviews going on, and my sixth and seventh have the test itself." He almost winced at how his voice had sharpened. He sounded almost annoyed…and that wasn't how he meant to sound at all! He lifted his eyes to Tsukasa's and felt them soften. His head ached with tiredness, his body was weary, but he almost smiled, looking at Tsukasa. "I have to be there today, Tsukasa." He said more softly. 'please understand me…I would love to stay home and have you care for me, but that's part of the reason why I have to go…I would like it for the wrong reasons, and I could never let you understand that.'

The boy sighed, his delicate eyebrows crinkling into an expression of concern and worry once again. Tomonori could see the gentle care that was the boy's intent just in how he sat, how his hand raised to touch him, but stopped. Tomonori's chest filled with warmth and sympathy. 'Oh, poor Tsukasa, he's trying not to show how he feels, but it's just so obvious now…I can't believe I never saw it before…' Once again, he felt guilty. He wished he didn't make Tsukasa hide what he felt like this…he felt so…connected to him now…like they had a sort of intimate bond of some kind, even though he had pushed away Tsukasa's feelings. It felt…right when they were together, but it…wasn't!

Tsukasa looked upset "But what if you fall asleep?" Tomonori sighed to himself, fighting the urge to laugh 'He just won't give up on me, I wonder what he has planned this time…' Tomonori grinned to himself behind his impassive mask. 'I wonder if I'll get another moment of accidental eagerness followed by a shocked 'ouch'…' Was his grimly amused thought to himself. He became serious almost at once. 'I don't actually want him to do that though! If I woke up and found him doing something, I would have to push him away again, and I can't hurt him like that! I won't do it!' He almost grimaced. 'But I'd have to…' He had an instant solution to Tsukasa's problem though he had none that would work for his own… "The teacher's lounge always has coffee, I can make it through the day" 'yes…the day will be easy compared to the night…' he thought to himself grimly. 'I can't let him catch me unaware. I can't tempt him to do something, because…he has the power to…' He stopped. He couldn't be a temptation to Tsukasa. Yes, HIM! A temptation! He nearly laughed out loud at the absurdity of it all. 'to think he'll push so hard to try to win such an unappealing prize…' He nearly blushed again. 'I can only hope he doesn't push so hard…I can't watch him all the time…' That wasn't all he had to worry about either…if he awoke in such a state, his grogginess could make it hard for him to control himself…and…while he was asleep…he might murmur…he might slip…he might say something…act a certain way…lead Tsukasa to the truth!

He couldn't even say it to himself that Tsukasa might slip behind the mask.

After all…that was what he'd been afraid, no, terrified of from the very beginning of all of this… That was the danger of all of this. Tsukasa certainly seemed to like him well enough now, but he didn't know how Tomonori was like behind this mask…did he? What if… Tomonori curled his toes under the table, unseen. It was less obvious than clenching his hands into fists, and it also managed to give him a way to keep in touch with emotional gestures and keep at least a bit of expression to himself—He just had figured out ways to do it that nobody would notice. The question remained in his mind.

'What if he doesn't like who I really am now?' It was captivating, horrifying, a revelation to him. That was another reason it was so tempting to keep hiding behind his carefully controlled facial expressions. Tsukasa felt so strongly now…maybe he preferred the mask to the person who hid behind it. The mask wouldn't protect him from Tsukasa's feelings…and even if he decided to come out from behind the mask and respond in kind, he had the nagging fear that Tsukasa would be gone suddenly, and he would be left alone with his inappropriate feelings. That the eraser would flutter away as suddenly as a sparrow once he swallowed those crumbs of adoration from Tomonori, leaving him empty as Tsukasa flew away to devour more people's affections...

He couldn't help thinking of the horrible idea that Tsukasa might be doing this as a joke or something…and if he were to respond…that he might be frightened, alarmed…

The boy suddenly shook his head, sending his malt colored hair flying. "But Tomonori-san—!" He had such an earnest look of caring to his face. His large eyes wide with worry and anguished affection so deep that it was just on the brink of distress. You couldn't find a single selfish thought in the whole of Tsukasa's open and unguarded face. Though there was guilt... Tomonori felt himself smile. He felt himself relaxing.

Tsukasa couldn't possibly hate him, Tsukasa couldn't even hate his enemies properly. No…even if Tomonori were to treat him unfairly Tsukasa would remain loyally caring. Tsukasa would stay with him…forever it seemed… It was one of his many wonderful personality traits…

He would stay forever…no…he wouldn't…he would leave! He would have to leave once school was over for him…So what would this love ever bring forth besides hardship? If he would just have to leave anyway…

But that sweet boy…Tsukasa…

"Tsukasa…do you really think you're going to get me to stay home?" He asked the boy gently. He was unexpectedly amused now. 'Oh dear…I'm mood-swinging…I must really be tired…I hope this day gets through with fast enough…'

The boy's pale face suddenly was stained with crimson, he bit his lower lip, blinking. His bangs fell over one of his eyes, he blinked his golden eyelashes free, glanced up at Tomonori, and blushed even deeper, looking at the table again. Tomonori's heart softened 'oh dear, he's taking that so literally too…I didn't mean to fluster him…' Tsukasa's huge quicksilver eyes closed. He looked almost ashamed and penitent. "No…not really…" He said quietly. He sounded so humbled and embarrassed… Tomonori looked at him with a look he hoped would ask him why he looked so sad, but Tsukasa took one glance at him, then blushed even deeper and looked all the more ashamed. He hesitantly met his eyes again. He bit his small lower lip. "But really…Tomonori-san…You shouldn't push yourself so hard…" He looked up at him "You're only human…"

Tomonori felt all the blood drain from his face and his belly suddenly twist painfully. He barely heard Tsukasa ask "Is that the saying?" with such innocence, the rush of blood in his ears was deafening him with horrible numbness…

Only human…

Tsukasa couldn't possibly know what hearing those words coming from his mouth did to Tomonori inside. He'd been telling himself all along that he wouldn't be good enough, but hearing it from Tsukasa's lips…It was numbingly painful. 'Yes…only human…of course…' There was a faint echo of anguish, of unhappiness in his chest, a sudden moment of hopelessness. Only human. ONLY. Not enough. Never enough! INFERIOR! WEAK!

How could he ever think to protect this creature?

'If I could change what I was born as, I would do it! But…I can't…I know I'm inferior and could never compare to you…but I never would have thought…you would tell me so….' Pain filled his chest, a numbing cold void like he had been doused in ice, shock.

He had always believed that Tsukasa could look over his flaws the way nobody else seemed to be able to…for some reason, he had…hoped? Hoped for what! He WAS only human, nothing could change that!

So why did this hurt so much? Because he'd blinded himself into believing that Tsukasa would never say it?

'I guess I'm just too much to look over…' He thought to himself gloomily.

Tsukasa's face suddenly slid into a mask of shock, he paled a dreadful white, his eyes almost consuming the rest of his face with how big they became, suddenly horrified. Tomonori's face had barely managed to register this, and fill with concern…he was about to ask if something was wrong, and try not to be so gloomy when he said it. But Tsukasa spoke first, in a strangely high voice, stammering. "I-I mean! Uh…You have limitations and…" Tomonori felt his face stiffen into the mask that wouldn't let Tsukasa know what these words were doing to him…Human. Limitations….'Stop! Stop this Tsukasa! Please!' He was begging for mercy so he could hold onto the tatters of a dream, a dream that had never been reality from the beginning.

Limitations…differences…inferiority…

But he could still feel that trembling form in his arms the night before, crying over atrophied wings that would never carry him again, and he had felt such compassion for him! He KNEW he could never understand it, but he hadn't thought he would need to, that somehow, he could still offer some sort of comfort when the boy hurt like this…

But he was only human. He reflected with bitterness. He wasn't enough even to try to protect him…

"And…oh NO!" Tsukasa made a distressed sound that made Tomonori's eyes jerk back to him, concerned, even surprised. It was a wavering cry of horror, of unhappiness "That's not what I mean Tomonori-san!" He exclaimed, looking stricken. His hand clasping his temples, looking more distressed than ever. Tomonori felt something slosh into his stomach, his chest warmed again. 'he…doesn't think I'm not good enough…that I'm inferior?' He pulled his face back into the mask again before he began to blush, or gave a look that might give away what he was feeling. 'He doesn't mind?' then suddenly 'wait…he could tell that that was what I was thinking?' "No…it's alright." He said quietly, trying not to become bewildered as his initial relief wore off. Had Tsukasa…seen what he was thinking, had his mask slipped even for only a moment? 'No! This cannot happen! I mustn't let this happen to us! But…Oh Tsukasa…thank you for this mercy…thank you for your blessed kindness…thank you…' His heart was filled with warmth.

A rose, a white rose… They were symbolic flowers, roses. Different colors for different types of love, and a white rose was pure. Pure unblemished, perfect, like the young angel was… It would never be his place to pick such a rose…he knew if he picked it, it would only be all the harder to protect that precious rose, to keep it safe from corruption, to keep it hidden away in his arms, and never drop it on the ground and let it bruise or become trampled by others. He would be so…inadequate… 'the corruption…of such a rose…' He fought the urge to shiver. 'it is a sin…a sin, I MUSTN'T pull him with me into sin…'

Mustn't taint the rose a dreadful crimson…mustn't taint the purity with a staining love…

The fate he had resigned himself to was worse than taking the rose. He had resigned himself to caring for the gentle blossom more than anything else, and so his heart would break when it was taken away and picked and given to someone else to protect, to cherish, to care for…

Giving away the rose to someone else who would cause the petals to flush red…

Realizing that his thoughts were becoming what he considered to be dangerously sensuous, Tomonori pulled his mind from them and focused more on what had just happened.

Though the scent of rose petals and the image of a blush spreading over Tsukasa's cheeks as a rose flushed red in his hands…those lingered….

He ordered his thoughts.

He couldn't explain the elation he felt at knowing that Tsukasa didn't consider him to be inferior after that single scare…that Tsukasa still cared for him, even if he was 'only human'

Poor Tsukasa's face was a picture of absolute wretched apology. Tomonori's insides twisted and gave a sharp pang at seeing the unhappiness and tension in his form at what he knew had upset Tomonori. His heart instantly went out to the boy. "You mustn't worry about it Tsukasa…" He said in what he hoped was a reassuring voice. It upset him to see the boy so worked up over a simple misunderstanding like this. 'does he truly not know me so well that he thinks I might become angry about something like this?'

Tsukasa's skin was still white, and his eyes were still large, he bit his trembling lips and asked shakily "A-Are you sure? I really didn't mean to—" Tomonori gave a genuine smile. 'oh poor boy…' "Yes, it's fine…don't worry about it" He meant it too. He understood that Tsukasa hadn't meant to imply that he was inferior…which was kind of him, even if the first remark had been completely honest and true anyway… He understood the boy's blessed mercy on him…he couldn't help but thank him for it…

Tsukasa relaxed, color returning to his face gradually/ He looked utterly relieved for whatever reason. "Ohhh…thank you…because I really didn't…um…you know!" He finished, looking flustered. Tomonori felt his smile growing, but he pulled it back down again. "I know." He said back reassuringly. 'poor sweet Tsukasa, I didn't mean to upset you that much, I really hope you believe me. Please don't worry…' He thought in a strange burst of affection for the eraser.

'Please…don't worry anymore…'

He could see the faint motion in Tsukasa's mostly concealed white throat as he gulped. He felt a sudden curious desire to press his fingertips to the boy's throat and feel the vibrations of his voice, to feel the motion as he spoke or shifted nervously. It was followed by a longing to kiss the pale throat, and hear Tsukasa's breathing quicken beneath his lips... The moment passed as he pulled his emotions back under control, embarrassed. "Tomonori-san…What was so important that you didn't go to sleep...?" Tsukasa asked softly. Tomonori forced himself not to look at the boy.. He couldn't bear to see the gentle face before him warp into the nightmare's tortured doppelganger. Tsukasa was silent. Tomonori could feel the slight jerk of the table as Tsukasa waved his feet back and forth underneath it. His dazed, sleep deprived mind was wandering. How could he explain this? How could he explain that he might have accidentally opened something private in Tsukasa's mind? What could DO that anyway in the first place? He had been thinking about Tsukasa a great deal before he had fallen asleep in the church, but that should have never been enough to pull him back to snoop through Tsukasa's mind, especially considering how far away he had been from the boy at the time of their coincidental slumber…something strange was going on.

'stop it! Think, Tomonori! What was so important that you pulled an all nighter? Answer him!"

"I…had a very strange nightmare…that's all" He nearly shuddered. How could that EVER be all with what his nightmare had been about? His eyes focused on the chipped mug that held half a cub of cold coffee. How many times would he have to fill that today because of this? 'Oh God let me not fall asleep in the middle of my classes…' He prayed in a mental groan.

There was a sudden warmth on his shoulder again. A flash of heat spread down his shoulder into his chest and blossomed there. It was as though the warmth spread through his veins. His vision cleared after a moment. Tsukasa's hand suddenly dropped away, and his face was suddenly spread with a blush.

Tomonori pretended not to look at the shy boy. 'Did he…just heal something in me?' some of his tension had gone away, and he felt suddenly a bit more peaceful, a bit more ready for the day… 'did I just tap into his healing powers?' He curled his toes under the table, going rigid. 'What's going on! Does he know I just accidentally stole some of his power?' Apparently not as the boy was still chewing on his lip in a most distracting fashion. "I-I should make you something to eat." He mumbled, blushing. Tomonori shook his head softly as he began to pick up the clutter on the table "Don't, I'm not hungry…but thank you." No he wasn't hungry at all…if he was hungry he wouldn't be able to stop thinking about Tsukasa chewing on his lip like that…damn, that was hard to ignore!

Tomonori frowned distractedly at the table as he quickly cleared away some of the books and scraps of paper, hastily stacking them on the stool he usually kept for papers. 'What could have happened that would do this? What's going on here? There has to be some kind of explanation! No person has ever been able to access energies of one outside of their own faction except in extremely rare cases! …what could possibly be doing this!' He carefully stacked a dictionary of angels on the floor—it wouldn't do for Tsukasa to see that now. "Tomonori-san…" Tomonori paused looking up and meeting Tsukasa's eyes. Tsukasa flushed suddenly, He pulled his hands up to his temples and shyly met Tomonori's gaze square in the eyes. 'forgive me for accidentally stealing your energy, I just wish I knew how I did it!' He projected to the boy "Are…Are you sure you're going to be alright?" He asked softly. Tomonori blinked. His eyes flickered to the mess on the table. 'If I can find out who this creature is that haunts the one I care for, then yes. Sleep will return.' He didn't say that of course. "Yes Tsukasa, I'll be alright." He sighed softly, lifting his eyes again. The boy looked suddenly pale. His smile trembled on his lips "Oh...o-okay. " He gulped nervously "E-Excuse me" He seemed to suddenly flee from the room.

Tomonori blinked, surprised. 'what was that? Did he just remember something? Maybe some homework?' He couldn't think for the life of him what might have caused such a reaction in the boy…

'it's probably nothing…' he reassured himself, sweeping things off the table. 'nothing to worry about…nothing at all…'

He wasn't very convinced.

-o-O-o-End of part eight-o-O-o-

(really this time…)

And now, Time for yet another mind warping end of chapter parody, full of all things suggestive and rather innapropriate…all the good things that fangirls endure my angst to see!

Where we last left our hapless bishies: after being forced to write review replies, and being sent numerous time to check for ants in a closet where none existed, our questionably dressed, favorite lovable featherduster villain, Lafayel, found himself with some issues to sort out. (other than the usual ones of how he was going to kill Israfel of course—those he was all the more certain of after being sent to break up several stomach turning make out sessions involving the other eraser he so detested) But these unexpected questions were mainly about his own feelings. …What did he really want in life? Why was he cast down to Earth in the first place? Was there destiny or fate? Would he ever make the perfect batch of muffins? (and all those other angst-trap meaning-of-life type questions) Perhaps this was his destiny…perhaps he was here for a reason…and it was time for him to seize control of his life!

And so it would be no surprise that we find the majority of our group of favorite enslaved angst slaves rather nervously cringing in the other room, as Lafayel decided to make his move.

NF: (peeks out from behind a chair looking distinctly disturbed) Are they done yet?

Kuro: (pokes his head out the door, then cringes and pulls it back in, shuddering) Er…no…

NF: (sighs) I guess given that it's Lafayel, I should have expected him to be a little more…violent about this sort of thing…

Tomonori: He's ruining half your kitchen from the sound of it…

NF: (shrugs) oh well. Some people will probably be happier now anyway…

Tsukasa: (sighs) if you say so…I can't believe he's not hurting Mizunagi-san…

NF: Er…well, if he's psychotic enough to…er…engage in such things with Lafayel, I'd suppose he knows what he's getting into…

Tomonori: (sternly) Not that your sending him to "check for ants" every few minutes would stifle him…

Kuro: (smirk) Oh? You sure that's the reason?

NF: (grin) Nah, you're just cranky because he kept stopping you and Amou from-

Tsukasa: (furiously red) Ah! Neurofeces-san!

Tomonori: Enough of that! (flustered)

NF: (smirk)

Kuro: (looking around worriedly) Say…has anyone seen Gabriel?

(sudden silence)

Tsukasa: Y-You mean that he's stuck out there?

Tomonori: Oh my…

NF: (wide eyed) with Lafayel and Mizunagi…er…you know?

(all stare at Kuro)

Kuro: (scratches his neck) Er…well…maybe he's passed out by now?

(a very shrill scream from the kitchen)

NF: Maybe he's not?

Tsukasa: (hastily looking around the corner)

Tomonori: (pulls him back quickly) Tsukasa…you really don't want to see this….

Tsukasa: But Gabriel's trapped out there!

Tomonori: (takes a more firm grip on Tsukasa's shoulders) Such sights would certainly taint your purity.

Tsukasa: But I can't just let him…stay in trouble like that!

NF: um…yes you could? I'm doing it, easy. (puts up feet on the desk)

Kuro: Uh huh…and the idea of what could be going on in that room doesn't…er…inspire you?

NF: (eyes narrow) Um…I do believe you are implying something.

Kuro: (meaningful look)

NF: I'm not addicted! I can stop anytime I want! Just because you're all hot bishounan and all…

Kuro: Uh huh…sure

NF: I mean…who say's I'm a fan of THAT!

Kuro: Oh no, no, certainly not me.

NF: I mean, I'll prove it to you! (picks up noodle) I'm totally not interested by this sort of thing at all!

Kuro: (grinning) oh no, of course not…Coming, depraved priest?

Tomonori: Depraved? I am a servant of the Lord!

Tsukasa: Wait! Tomonori-san! What if you get hurt? I have to come too!

Tomonori: Tsukasa, you won't want to see this.

Tsukasa: (hugs him around the middle) But you said that whatever we'd do, we'd do together…(fixes Tomonori with "the look")

Tomonori: …

Tsukasa:…please? Just let me make sure you're okay?

Kuro&NF: (roll eyes in unison)

(Another shrill scream)

NF: Okay! I'm going to prove once and for all that I am NOT a fangirl! Let's go! Quickly! Before they finish up…you know…(evil grin)

Tsukasa: (blinks) What are they 'finishing up' Tomonori-san?

Kuro: (snorts and fights down his laughter)

Tomonori: (blushes) erm…

NF: (snickers and holds the noodle a little higher) alright, the screaming's coming from the dining room…on three! One…two….(pauses)

(JO bishies blink)

Kuro: er…yes?

NF: hmm? Oh sorry, just thinking about—uh…it doesn't matter! THREE!

(calmly opens the door and walks in)

Gabriel: (screams and points at the table)

Tsukasa: oh…!

Kuro: (stares)

Tomonori:…it's…a gallon of milk?

Kuro: (sighs and hides the milk under the table) There there Gabriel…it's going to be just fine. (hugs him and pats his back while rolling his eyes and giving the rest of the group a look like "if he wasn't so pretty, I wouldn't be doing this…")

Gabriel: (whimpering and clutching Kuro) It's Milk, Master! I thought it was gone but…but…but it… (breaks down into sobs)

Tsukasa: Oh dear…it's going to be okay Gabriel!

Tomonori: …

NF: (dissappointed) Huh…okay?

Tomonori: At least he's relatively safe…(cleans glasses, frowning)

NF: yeah, bummer. Hmm…well, since the three of them are all immobilized by the sight of a gallon of milk, and there's relatively little chance of a threesome in the meantime… (evil snicker)

Tomonori: (eye twitches and he looks rather disturbed) (coughs delicately)

NF: I guess we'd better go…er…stop Lafayel from wrecking my kitchen, right? (evil grin) heheheh…

Tomonori: (frowns) er…yes…

NF: (practically skips to the kitchen door and listens eagerly against the door) (puts a finger to her lips to motion for Tomonori to be quiet)

(through the door)

Lafayel: Ugh! You're so useless!

Mizunagi: hey, it's not like you did a better job, it's not my fault you're inexperienced!

Lafayel: (groans) just get this over with already! Hurry up!

(other side of the door)

NF: (raises eyebrows at Tomonori, smirking)

Tomonori: (looks uncomfortable)

(back to listening)

(sound of movement)

Lafayel: (grunts) I think I'm stuck.

Mizunagi: Oh, that's brilliant of you. You're really superior all right. Leave it you to get stuck.

(opposite side of the door)

NF: (mouthes the word "stuck?" to Tomonori)

Tomonori: (growing gradually more and more pale)

(In the kitchen)

(clunk)

Lafayel: OUCH! Watch what you're doing there!

Mizunagi: (snickering) You're such a girl…

Lafayel: What did you call me?

Mizunagi: Heh, well you squeal like one…You should be grateful, I could have left you stuck, you know..

Lafayel: ugh, you're an imbecile. Just give me a screw.

(Outside the door)

Tomonori: (eyes get huge)

NF: (looks both delighted and vengeful at the same time)

(from the kitchen)

Mizunagi: Fine, I'll do it quick.

Lafayel: hurry up, it's starting to drip all over me…(sounds disgusted)

(outside)

Tomonori: (faints)

NF: (kicks open the door and brandishes the noodle) NO SCREWING IN MY KITCHEN!

Lafayel & Mizunagi: (stare) Eh? (in unison)

NF: (blink)

(long moment of silence)

NF: er…what?

Lafayel: (bangs his head on a pipe and swears)

Mizunagi: (smirks) screw?

Lafayel: Your damned sink pipe burst! (red in the face)

NF: (lowers the noodle) Oh…(sounds disappointed)

Lafayel: Filthy human! EUGH! (shoves away at Mizunagi) Don't you touch me! Ugh…EUGH!

NF: (snickers)

Mizunagi: (gives her a bland smile) Hmm. You think I'd like this big of an ego? (points at Lafayel and raises his eyebrows)

Lafayel: (still disgusted) Don't you even dare to look at me! UGH! Filthy!

Mizunagi: (notices Tomonori passed out near the door) I see you aren't the only one. Heh, now there's a dirty mind, can't believe he's really a priest.

NF: hmmph…(leans on the noodle looking bored) Yeah.

Lafayel: (still screeching) VILE!
NF: Care to shut him up?

Mizunagi: (smirks around his fresh cigarette) I could. But he wouldn't like it.

NF: (grins) all the better.

Lafayel: VIIILE!

Mizunagi: (grabs him by the head and kisses him)

Lafayel: (stiffens)

NF: (smirk) Osser.

Tomonori: (comes to, groaning)

NF: (looks at him)

Tomonori: (takes one look at Mizunagi and Lafayel, still stuck together and promptly faints away again)

NF: (laughs all the harder) Oy Vey, so very very very nasty! Osser, osser, osser! (cackles and runs off again)

Lafayel: (pushes Mizunagi away) I am going to KILL you…(whispers as he wipes his mouth, eye twitching erratically)

Mizunagi: (laughing riotously to himself as he teleports away)

Lafayel: (swearing vilely as he runs through the dining room past a startled Kuro and Tsukasa—Gabriel has completely passed out from emotional stress)

Kuro: (sweatdrop)

And for all of you pervy little green beans who were thinking there was LafayelXMizunagi sex…or worse, LafayelXMizunagiXGabriel…shame on you! (cackles)

I'm so bad…

Uh huh, Lafayel's version of the meaning of life apparently has to do with causing the most destruction possible. And fixing my sink fits in rather well with all of that apparently (those of you who disagree have never tried to clean out my sink…).

But at least he feels better…right?

(Hee, what a horrible thing for me to do to all the LafayelXMizunagi fans…I was dissappointed with myself too, but I thought it would be better if I insinuated and did other such evil things and allowed perverted minds like my own to run wild. (giggle))

Anyway, the plot of this story's really going to get moving soon…

Oh, don't worry, T and T will still be sappy and such, but this DOES take place in the middle of a war…(grin) oh yes, and I happen to be obsessed with angels…have been for quite a while now, so…well…there have to more than just three fallen angels, right? (grin)

Watch out world, you've unleashed the wave of feces!

Ps. "Osser" is yiddish for "forbidden" from what I can tell. I'm not jewish, I just picked it up off my friend (giggle)