Sawyer pulled Kate closer and dropped her wrist. He had a feral look in his eye that under any other circumstances she would have found incredibly sexy, hell it even registered somewhere in the back of her mind now.
She felt as though she would throw up, he knew about the baby. He was begging her to say it. She wanted to say it. Say three little words, three little words that had ruined her life once. But they couldn't be bad omens. She hadn't lost that baby out of love.
She wanted to tell him but every time she tried the words would stick in her throat and it was impossible to get them out. The only thing she could manage to choke out was "I can't." She wished he would believe her. Believe that she couldn't'.
She could feel his breath on her and feel his skin sticking her hers. The air seemed stale like when you pull the blanket over your head and it's too thick for air to get through.
It registered that she was shaking and she tried to control it but it didn't work. He asked her again. He was almost begging her.
"I need to hear you say it." He told her again.
Kate felt invisible strings pulling her forward; she was on her tiptoes falling into him. She could feel his hair against her face before it registered that she was nestled up against him. She tried to choke out those three simple words again, knowing full well that part of her didn't want to say it, but the raw intensity of the moment called for the words. The words she couldn't say. She died in her throat.
She could feel the air in her throat, all she needed to do was form the words and choke them out. It was that simple, it wasn't a hard task, it was something she did every day. Just form the words and make the noise.
She tried to focus on the words, on the mundane task in front of her but was continually distracted by the smell of clover in his hair. He had used the shampoo she left out for him. He smelled like her father. Again and again she focused and again and again the words died. She couldn't have been standing there for more than 2 seconds but it felt like an eternity. She had to say something. She was sure of that.
Kate focused; she'd do it this time. "Sawyer…I need you." She was so quietly that she wasn't even sure she said it. She was incredibly disappointed. She still hadn't done it.
The invisible strings let go of her suddenly and she stumbled back. She could feel her knees go weak beneath her and she sat down before she fell. Kate leaned her head back and closed her eyes; the last image she saw before her eyelids closed was Sawyer leaning up against the wall.
As she sat there she could feel her pulse slowing and her breathing was becoming more regular. She sat down replaying what had just happened in her head over and over again. When she opened her eyes again he was gone. It was a bit darker and the noise outside told her time had passed and people had come back to the area. She had a feeling she had fallen asleep. It was validated by the pain in her leg when she stood up. She had a horrible headache and went to find Sun, she didn't feel like dealing with Jack at the moment.
"Kate Scarlett." Trent cooed as Kate packed her bag earning him a look of disdain.
"Just because my mother is a nutcase and named me after a movie character doesn't mean I like it okay." She wasn't in the mood for him attempted lightening of the mood.
"Kate, Katherine, whatever you want me to call you, baby, let me go with you."
Kate stuffed a shirt into the suitcase. "No. For the hundredth time no. I don't even want to go but I have to tell my mom."
"Do it over the phone." Trent coaxed.
"I can't. I know it seems bizarre but I just have to tell her in person." Kate stopped packing and wrapped her arms around her husband. "It's something I can share with her, and I don't have much of that. She's my mom."
Trent kissed the top of her head and rested his chin there. "I know that. I just want to go, I can't stand the thought of that bastard even looking at you."
"He shouldn't be there." Kate smiled even though he couldn't see her. "I'll be fine. Don't worry."
"I love you."
"I love you too." Kate pulled away kissing him and then going back to packing. "I think I want a girl."
Trent came up behind her wrapping his arms around her and resting his hands on her barely formed bump. "Like I said before, it doesn't matter to me. As long as it has your smile Katie." He kissed her neck.
Kate giggled and pulled away. "You're going to make me late."
"There are always more flights." Trent reached for her and she ran to the other side of the bed, smacking his hand in the process.
"Stop that! We were supposed to be catching a flight to see your aunt when we conceived this little surprise."
Trent rolled his eyes, sighing unhappily. "Fine. I can't go, I can't touch you."
8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
"I can't believe you did this Kate!" Her mom yelled as she paced the house.
"Why not? You said he'd be gone and I wanted to come tell you." Kate was sitting down crying.
"He could come back."
"Don't you get it! Come with me mom, leave him."
Her mom stopped sitting on the edge of the couch. "I can't leave him Katherine, I love him."
"He beats you mom."
"Mind your business Katherine."
"It is my business! You're my mom. Come on!" Kate stood up pulling at her mom like a child. "We'll leave, me and Trent have a guest bedroom and you can stay with us. You'll find someone better than Wayne." She touched a piece of her mom's hair. "Look at this, gray hair. Come on, tonight we'll go to a hotel, an expensive one and live in luxury. You'll never see the bastard again."
"Bastard. I thought we raised you better." Wayne said. Kate turned suddenly, blanching to see him standing in the doorway. "That's not a nice word, maybe we should wash your mouth out."
He had been drinking Kate could tell immediately. "You didn't raise me." She regretted not bringing Trent along. Trent had been a star football player in high school, he would have done it in college but he broke his leg jumping off the roof of the barn with Kate. He was strong and not scared of Wayne. He wasn't scared of anything as far as Kate was concerned.
"So why are you here?" Wayne was heading towards her.
"I needed to talk to my mom."
"You're trying to steal her! You want to take her away you stupid bitch." Before Kate even had time to react he had slapped her in the face.
Her mom rushed forward grabbing Wayne. "Don't." She tried to put her arms around him to calm him.
"Don't Diana." He pushed her away and grabbed Kate. "I've had enough of you Katherine. I raised you, I put food on the table and this is my reward, you trying to take my wife away. I thought I told you never to come back." He was lifting her off the ground by her throat and she couldn't breath.
Her mom tried again. "Wayne! Stop it." Kate was choking audibly. "Wayne! Stop it! Stop it!" To her own surprise and Kate's she hit him. He turned suddenly throwing her against the coffee table and dropped Kate. She wasn't moving but seemed to be breathing. At lease she was alive Kate thought.
Kate tried to scramble for the door to go get help but he turned noticing her. "Kate, don't run. Please." His voice was calmer now as he made his way over to her, kneeling down as she back against the wall.
"I have too." Kate tried to stand up but he was over her, with his knees on her chest. "Please." Kate was ready to beg, it wasn't just her life she'd be begging for.
"I remember when you first starting bringing those boys into the house. Up to your room they would go. Your mom and me pretended not to notice; we did Kate. Trent must have been one special son of a b!tch."
"Wayne, just let me go. I won't come back."
"You always say that Kate." He moved his face closer to hers and she could smell the alcohol on his breath. "And you always come back. Again and again."
Kate had dealt with him like this before but it still scared her. "If you'd just let me go…"
His fist cut her off and he pushed more of his weight into her causing her to scream. Please don't hurt the baby she thought over and over. "But you always denied me Katie. Like that time I read you the three little pigs, do you remember that?"
"I was a little girl." Kate was crying now, tears running down her face.
"You're not a little girl anymore." She could feel his hand on her leg, slowly moving upwards it made her sick. "You're a woman now. A very beautiful woman."
"Get off me." She said between her teeth. She tried to throw him off but he was stronger than her and all it did was make him angry.
He slammed her back down roughly and she let out a yelp. "You won't deny me tonight Katherine." He hand was in her inner thigh.
She screamed, it was all she knew to do, scream. As he picked her up she fought like she'd heard on those talk shows, kicking and scratching and biting. It didn't seem to faze him much; he must have been drunker than she thought. Or just evil enough to not care. AS he dropped her on the bed he made sure to let her head hit the headboard.
Her eyes were stinging from the makeup running into them and her voice hurt from yelling. She knew it was no good; her neighbors weren't close enough to hear. But as he straddled her she continued to yell.
"Shut up!" He screamed at her, grabbing her by the hair. "Shut up!"
Kate continued to scream and tried again to push him off she almost knocked him off balance but he caught himself before she had time to get anywhere.
"I said shut up!" He slammed her head back. She continued to scream despite his protests until he started punching her stomach. She immediately fell silent. "Good girl." His hand snaked underneath her top. "Slamming your head didn't stop you. Why'd that?" He asked as he started removing her shirt. She looked at him unsure of how to react, she didn't want to make him more angry. She was trying to come up with a plan in her head. "Now you're quiet you little whore." He removed her bra leaving her exposed and embarrassed. "Well it doesn't matter to me." She could see his hand heading for his belt and suddenly felt as if she'd get sick. Her eyes followed his dirty fingers…
"What the fck are you doing?" A voice came that caused Kate to brighten even in these circumstances.
"Tom." She whispered.
Wayne had spun around almost causing Kate to fall to the floor. She grabbed for her clothes redressing quickly. "Get the hell out boy."
"You said…you told me he never touched you." Tom looked at Kate then back at Wayne, hatred growing in his eyes. "I was driving by, saw the rental, I was hoping it was you Katie."
Wayne stood up his belt hanging open grossly. At this movement Tom looked around suddenly his eyes landing on a vase of flowers. He grabbed it, looking almost frightening even to Kate, with the horrific look of hatred that he had.
"I swear to God if you don't get out I'll kill you." He told Wayne moving in on him like a lion stalking prey. "In fact I should kill you now." He lunged at him breaking the vase on Wayne. Before he had time to swing again Wayne had taken off out of the room sloppily, almost falling.
"I'll get you." He told Tom as he turned around at the doorway, holding his bleeding face.
"Fck you." Tom threw what was left of the vase at him as Wayne turned and left.
Kate was sitting back on the bed, her top back on. She was crying and as Tom sat down next to her she grabbed onto him.
"Oh Katie. I'm so sorry. You should have told me. I'm so sorry." Tom told her, holding her close and smoothing her hair. "If I had just known."
"I didn't want him to hurt you." Kate looked at him and pulled back placing a hand on her stomach. "It's dead Tom. My baby's dead."
He blanched and his eyes got wide. "Your baby?" He asked confused but at the look of despair on her face he regained himself. "You don't know that. Sometimes babies are fine after trauma. I've seen it happen."
Kate shook her head. "I just know it. I know it, he killed my baby and oh Tom I'm so sorry." She grabbed onto him again crying into his white doctors coat, it already had two black marks from her mascara. "I'm so sorry for what I did to you. I just had to go."
"Shhh. It's okay." He rocked her gently.
Kate let him hold her trying to calm herself, trying to get the image of Wayne out of her head. She knew she should go check on her mom but couldn't do it, her mom had let this happen. She had known for years. Instead Kate just sat there letting Tom rock her. When she had went silent he pulled back a bit to look at her.
Kate wiped her eyes. "Tom?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
Tom was silent for a few seconds looking down at his hand, which now housed a wedding band. Finally he looked back up. "I love you too."
Kate kissed him hungrily. It didn't matter that Trent was at home waiting for her, worrying. It didn't matter that she lost her baby. It didn't matter that Tom married one of the blond bimbos that had been trailing him all their life. No, none of it mattered. Those people, they were just people. Filler. They loved each other and everyone knew it. They had always loved each other. Kate let her hands roam all over him, feeling the still familiar curves of his body; it was like a path home. This man she would love forever. She lay back pulling him down with her.
One of his hands was wrapped in her hair tugging at it gently while the other explored her body, quickly moving over the bump. When his hands went under her shirt she felt relived to have the familiar fingers touching her again.
But suddenly he had pulled away, sitting up and rebuttoning the pants Kate had skillfully undone.
"Whats wrong" Kate asked.
"I'm married." Tom looked down at her sadly.
"But we're together Tommy." Kate pulled him towards her again.
He ducked out of her grasp. "I'm sorry Kate. Maybe, maybe if you had come back sooner." He was standing up and reaching into his wallet. He threw some money at her. "Go home Kate."
"What! I don't need your money Tom!" Kate was dismayed. This had to be some sort of sick joke. She felt sick again.
There was something moving in her camp. She couldn't tell what it was in the dark and groped around for something, she wasn't sure what.
Suddenly the thing had grabbed her and covered her mouth and the thing's freshly cut hair was tickling her face. "Shh." Sawyer whispered to her. "I hear something." He slowly moved his hand.
"We're on an island with 40 other people." Kate whispered back annoyed. ""And what the hell are you doing here?"
"I was walking when I heard something. I think it's them." Sawyer whispered squinting his eyes and looking into the darkness. "There's something there."
Kate sighed and squinted too, partially annoyed by the fact that he was still holding onto her like you would a screaming child trying to run into the road. There was something there.
Then it came, the rustling and noise accompanying the shaking. Suddenly the thing was lifted off the ground and in the moonlight it was more visible. The thing clearly was a man. Kate made to move, a sudden instinct making her want to help the man. She wouldn't have run out there but it was just a move forward wanting to help.
Sawyer tightened his grip on her and pulled her back into the shadowier part of the camp with him. They could no longer see what was going on around them. The noise quickly stopped but they sat huddled for minutes breathing deeply scared.
"Do you think it's gone?" Kate finally whispered.
"I don't know." Sawyer whispered back, yawning.
"Sawyer?" Kate whispered turning her head.
"Yeah?" He asked.
"Stay here okay? Until it's light."
"Okay."