Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

A/N: Wow, 114 reviews. I'm so proud and grateful. So firstly I would like to thank all of you who reviewed, you're so very kind and I really appreciate it. :D

Secondly, I would like to apologize for this being so late…again. School started last week and I've been busy with all my homework. I go to a college prep school, so it's hard to get free time. This chapter goes out to all my reviewers. I love you all.

I spent my last day of freedom at Bumbershoot, which is a music festival in Seattle. It was wonderful. School, the next day was kind of depressing but it was nice to see all my friends. I'm in 10th grade now…it's hard to believe. There are only 46 kids in my grade and only 300 kids in the entire school. I know them all really well; I think this year will be a good one.

Anyways, I wrote this chapter while stuffing my face with Taco Bell and listened to Jimmy Eat World. So now I feel really unhealthy. Jimmy Eat World isn't unhealthy though. "It takes my pain away…" okay, okay, I'm sorry I'll get to the story. guilty look

Cigarettes and Lavender

Chapter 13-Big Brother (no relation to 1984)

Bi Polar

Mrs. Higurashi had long retired upstairs, but Inuyasha and Kagome remained in the kitchen. He took small tentative sips from his tea and she watched him with curiosity. Neither made an effort to say anything. Kagome still was digesting everything that he had told her. She could hardly comprehend that the teenager sitting besides her had gone through what he had just revealed. His golden eyes were dull and somber.

Kagome didn't know what compelled her to abruptly reach out and hold his hand, but she did. His head shot up but his lips turned upward slightly when he saw her staring down at their interlocked hands.

"I haven't thought about him in a long time…" He spoke in a hushed voice, his voice hoarse from crying and talking.

She squeezed his hand. "Your brother?"

He nodded and gave a tragic smile at the thought. "I miss him. I can't believe it's been four years."

"I'm so sorry." She meant it sincerely and he knew, so he scooted close to her. Partially because he wanted her to know that he was okay and partially because he just wanted to be near her. Her sweet scent filled his nose and he sighed deeply, relaxing for the first time that day.

"It's fine…it's about time I gave him some thought…it's going to take some time to get over all of this…"

She nodded in understanding. "I…I really don't know what to say to you, it's hard to believe, you know."

"Yea, I wouldn't expect you to fully get it right away. You'd creep me out if you did." He gave a small chuckle; she smiled at his light attitude. It was quiet again, both fine with the silence. Inuyasha removed his hand from her's and got up to wash out his cup.

He leaned over the sink as thoughts Sesshomaru crowded his mind. Kagome stared at Inuyasha's back, she didn't get up or ask if he was okay; she just watched. Somehow it seemed like the right thing to do.

"I remember…" He spoke slowly. "When we use to spend days sleeping in the woods outside of park, I felt safer inside those dark woods than I ever did in my own home. Sesshomaru would always sneak different things from the house whenever we went back. Soon we had our own little utopia in the middle of some residential forest." He smiled.

"His funeral was pathetic…" The grin vanished from his face and he squeezed his eyes shut. "Dad didn't even show up. He had passed out the night before after hitting me. I came…bruised and bloody. Mom came with liquor. A flask in each one of her socks, one in her bra, and one in her hand. No one had hired a priest, dad only had enough money for a wooden cross and to hire a couple guys to dig and lower Sess into the grave. None of the kids from Sesshomaru's school came…they didn't know that he had even…died. It was just me and mom and two random guys standing there, in front of some puny cross." Inuyasha still stared at the sink breathing deeply feeling Kagome's eyes on his back. "I need to go visit him…"

"Do…Do you think that I can come?" Kagome switched her gaze to the floor, guilty for her question. She felt like she was intruding.

"…Yes. I think that would be grand." Inuyasha turned to look at her, his eyes softening. "He would've loved you."

She gave him a thankful smile. "I would've loved to have met him."

Inuyasha slid down the kitchen cabinets and sat on the linoleum floor. Kagome watched him sit there with that same dazed look that he had when she first saw him sitting in the sacred tree outside the kitchen window. They sat there for awhile, just in the quiet of the night.

Kagome got up slowly and moved across the kitchen to sit besides him. She laid her head on his shoulder, kissing his cheek in the process. He slid his arm around her waist pulling her closer, needing her warmth and gentleness.

"Inuyasha?"

"Hmm?"

"I…" She paused and Inuyasha didn't make an effort to fill it. "I think I'm falling in love with you."

He sat there, tense and soundless. Kagome began to pull back, feeling self conscious after his prolonged silence, but he pulled her back where she fell into his chest, sniffing in his musky scent. "No…don't go." There was another pause, but this one not quite as long. "I think I'm falling for you too."

She looked up into his handsome face that was covered by his unruly hair and smiled; Inuyasha smiled back before placing his lips over hers. It was a chaste kiss, slow and steady but over fast enough so that you missed it.

Kagome pulled away giving him a small peck on his lips and a grin, she fell back into his chest, listening to his soft steady heart beat. He laid his head atop her's, kissing her raven locks.

Inuyasha woke with the sun heating up his face. His eyes opened slowly, almost reluctantly. The kitchen was basked in the sunlight making him shut his eyes in surprise. He looked down to see Kagome still lying on his chest, her long black hair hanging over her pale face. He smiled at her, the scent of lavender consuming the area around them. He leaned back against the cabinets, taking in the scent of early morning and Kagome.

But a movement from the kitchen entrance made him catch his breath and sit straight up. Inuyasha turned his head and sighed in relief when he realized who it was.

"Morning Inuyasha." Mrs. Higurashi stood in the archway leading to the living room.

Inuyasha only nodded in return, not wanting to wake the blue eyed beauty that was currently drooling all over his shirt. Mrs. Higurashi gave him a knowing glance and a wink before moving to the refrigerator to start on breakfast. Inuyasha felt all the blood move to his face instantly turning him bright red with humiliation.

The small movement against his chest caused him to forget Mrs. Higurashi's awkward actions. Kagome's long eye lashes fluttered open, her charming blue eyes glistening with morning sleepiness.

She beamed up at Inuyasha, wiping the drool from her face and then moving to give him a quick kiss on the lips. Inuyasha, in turn, turned even redder with discomfort knowing that her mother was watching their every move. She pulled back giving him another grin.

"Morning!" She said brightly.

"Umm…" Inuyasha nodded his head towards the kitchen table. Kagome turned to look where he was nodding and stiffened when she saw her mother looking at them with her eyebrows raised. Mrs. Higurashi giggled and went upstairs to wake Souta for school.

Kagome slowly turned to look at Inuyasha, both blushing madly. Kagome scooted away from Inuyasha and got to her feet. He missed her warmth and frowned at her as she looked down at him. She smiled knowing the reason for his sadness and held out her hand. "I have to go to school, you know that."

"Yea…but I still wish you could stay here with me." He pouted.

"Don't worry; school will be over before you know it."

"I hope you're right."

He grabbed her hand and she helped him up. He went to sit down at the kitchen table and she ran upstairs to get changed.

It was only a matter of minutes before Souta came rushing down the stairs only to halt at the kitchen table. He stared at Inuyasha with only the type of innocent curiosity that a child could offer. Inuyasha stared right back at the small blue eyed boy. Then in a flash Inuyasha found him in his arms, Souta burrowing his head in Inuyasha's sweatshirt. "I'm so glad you're back." He stepped back and gave him a toothy smile and watery eyes.

Inuyasha stared down at Souta before grinning and pulling him into another hug. Surprisingly the young boy had grown on him. "I afraid I was never going to see you again…big brother…" Souta said the last part hesitantly, not wanting to insult the older boy.

But Inuyasha smiled gently before answering. "I don't think I'll be going anywhere anytime soon, little brother." Souta beamed and went to sit in the chair next to him to begin his morning routine of jabbering nonsense.

Kagome was back downstairs in minutes, pushing her brother out of his chair so she could sit next to the silver haired teenager. Souta pouted and the two started arguing like siblings so often do. Inuyasha ignored it, thinking about all that had happened over the past few hours.

He had let go. It was time to leave it behind. It was time to start over anew.

He was no longer a prisoner of his own fear and addictions. Better yet, he was no longer a prisoner to his parents. He was free.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome's impatient voice thundered above his loud thoughts. He turned to her startled.

"Huh?"

"I said that I have to go." She looked miserable to leave him, the feeling was mutual but he hid it well not wanting her to get distracted from her school work.

"Then I'll see you in a little while." He stood up from his chair and walked to the back door where she now stood. He leaned down smirking at her red cheeks before he quickly moving in for the kill. She closed her eyes and smiled, bringing her arms up around his neck. Inuyasha held her close savoring the taste of the strawberry gloss on her soft lips. They pulled apart when Souta started to make smooching sounds then replacing it with 'eww's' and 'that's so gross'.

They grinned at each other their cheeks red with embarrassment. Kagome gave him a small hug before she pulled away and walked out the door waving to him on the way out. Souta followed her, but not before whispering. "Now you really can be my big brother, I won't have to pretend."

A/N: Thanks again to you reviewers. I'm really grateful.

HayLin4: haha. Hyper, maybe? Thanks for the review.

GIRL IN STORY: I'm glad you liked the retelling, I was afraid it wouldn't work out. I really wish it wasn't based on my friend either. But he's doing a lot better now and I'm so relieved. Thanks for you review and your concern. :)

Whitewolf33: hehe. Cookies are always good rewards. :D Thank you.

Luv,angel-muzik,baby: Thank you so much for your kindness. I'll tell him, I'm sure he'll appreciate more than anything. He's doing better, so hopefully everything will work out. Hmm…any type you want. I'm a pretty good cook, but chocolate chip cookies are my favorite. Yours?

Inuyashasgirl1517: Thanks and no problem, I'll try and get some long chapters in here and there. But this is once again a little calm before the storm.

DarkWolves Faith: Aww, you're so sweet, thank you so much. :D I'm pleased you liked it.

Jakenliker: haha, everyone has been saying that it was really sad. I hope it isn't too horribly depressing. :)

Mikomi the youkai: Yes ma'am! salutes hehe.

Bubblez4ya: Aw! I didn't mean to make you cry! hands tissue box I'm so sorry, I'm pleased you liked it though. :D

Ya1ya: I'm making everyone cry and I feel guilty. What was I getting myself into when I decided to write and angst fic? Haha. Thank you so much for the review though.

One-Mean-Rabbit: I hope I didn't hurt you in anyway. Hitting that sore spot, that is. You're a lovely person and your review has made me so proud. Reviews like yours keep me writing. I'm so appreciative. (By the way, I love your name. :D)

Peoplekityo: Thank you so much. I tried really hard to define the characters personalities, even if Inuyasha and Sesshomaru are out of character. I wanted them to become their own person and not just…normal, I guess. Anyways, I'm glad I achieved that and thank you so much for your support. :D I hope you like this fluff. 3

InuKagluver91: haha. Is that a good Jesus Christ or a bad Jesus Christ? I was thinking the same thing when I was writing the last chapter chapter. Hehe.

TheyCallMeTaterSalad: Thank you. :) I love Inuyasha's-past-sucks-balls stories. Haha.

AnimeAngelz: Oh! Please don't cry! Here's some fluff to make you happy!

Inashosetai: I'm so sorry you cried! Well, I wasn't actually going to put in the whole sexually molested thing, but as I thought about it more and more; Sesshomaru wouldn't commit suicide unless something really horrible happened. He wouldn't leave Inuyasha alone if it weren't for something traumatizing. Thanks for all the support. I hope we can talk sometime soon, it's been awhile.

Hanako Horigome: Thanks for the review…I'm sorry for making it so sad; but I wanted to make it memorable, haha, guess it worked.

Kasandra: Don't worry, I think it's almost impossible for a romance story not to have a good ending.

Akina315: I hope I see another review from you, if you're still reading. :D I also hope that you didn't cry too hard. Thanks.

Zfreak: I'm delighted you like it so much, even though it is an angsty fic.

Amber: Amazing. Hehe…you're making me blush. Thanks. :D

Angel61991: All 12? Wow, I'd have to take a break. My attention span is tiny. Thanks for the support. :)

King-shippo: Thank you for reviewing. I love getting them. :D

Carol J: hehe I'm so lucky you found it. Thanks. :D

Please review! Hopefully the next chapter will be a little longer.