Since so many people enjoyed my vision, as stated in A Day at the Spa, I thought it would be cool to write it out, in a different setting and situation. I might write another version of my vision, but I wrote this one first. Anyways, enjoy!

Laundry

Riza Hawkeye sighed. She had a problem: she needed someone to pick up her laundry from the cleaners. Normally, she would do it herself, but today she had to bring Black Hayate to the vet for an appointment at 0430 hours. And the cleaners closed at 0500 hours. She wouldn't be able to make it in time, which now leads to the current situation: she needed to ask someone to pick up her laundry.

She would usually ask Fuery to pick it up for her, but he was sick today. Falman was her next choice, but he had left early. Breda and Havoc… she trusted them, but not enough to convince her that they wouldn't go through her things. Who knows what kinds of bets or jokes they would make up? All that remains is… the Colonel. She sighed. The Colonel was just as likely to go through her laundry as Havoc and Breda were, but at least he would keep quiet about it, and only joke about it around her.

But… she didn't have to pick it up today. She could wait until tomorrow. But then, she wouldn't have any uniforms to wear tomorrow; except for that prototype miniskirt Roy had somehow snuck into her suitcase while packing up for their move to Central. And no way in hell was she going to wear that. Riza looked at the clock: 0420 hours. She sighed again and got up from her desk. It was now or never.

"Permission to speak freely, sir."

Roy looked up from doodling on his paper. "Permission granted, Lieutenant."

"I know that you have already let me leave early for Hayate's appointment, but I have one more favor to ask, sir."

"What is it?"

Riza took a deep breath before continuing. "I need you to pick up my laundry from the cleaners on Main Street by 0500 hours."

Roy smirked and Riza's eye twitched. "Why, Lieutenant, I'll be happy to."

"Thank you, sir." She lowered her voice so that only he could hear and said, "You look through my clothes, and I promise that you won't be able to have kids anymore." Riza took a step back and saluted. "I'll be leaving now, sir."

Roy waved off her salute and gulped as she turned around and left. Damn! That woman is scary. As soon as the door closed behind her, Roy cleaned up his desk and ordered Havoc to watch the office when he was gone. After a few protests from Havoc and a threat to burn his balls, Roy grabbed his trench coat and headed out the door.

Walking along Main Street, Roy found the cleaners Riza was talking about. It was a small, quaint building, but apparently successful. He went inside it and headed toward the counter where a boy about 15 years old was sitting behind it. The look on his face showed that he did not want to be there.

"Excuse me, but I'm here to pick up Riza Hawkeye's laundry." He flashed the boy a winning smile, hoping it would loosen him up. It didn't. It actually made him a little angry and he glared at Roy upon hearing Riza's name.

"And who are you? You're not Miss Hawkeye."

"True. I am not Miss Hawkeye. I am Miss Hawkeye's boss. She asked me to pick up her laundry today."

"How do I know you're not a perverted bastard who just wants to sniff her panties (even though they're already clean)?"

"Because, kid, I really am her boss. And if you," Roy held up his gloved fingers in snapping position, "don't want to be torched by the Flame Alchemist, I suggest you give me her laundry now."

The boy didn't look the least bit frightened by the threat. Actually, he looked bored. "Whatever." He turned around and got up to retrieve what Roy had wanted so much. He returned with a laundry basket filled with neatly folded clothes. Her military uniforms were placed on the bottom and to Roy's surprise and delight… lacy underwear on top.

"Thank you."

"That would be 500 cenz."

"What?" Roy patted his pockets, checking if he had some change. Damn it! I don't have any money on me. "Uh… Just put it on Hawkeye's tab, and I'll be sure to tell her to pay you tomorrow."

"Whatever." After saying thanks, again, Roy took the basket and headed out.

Once out the door, he started walking to Riza's house. People gave him strange looks as he passed them. What a sight he must've been with a basket of clothes topped with women's undergarments. As soon as he reached her house, he took out the key he knew Riza had hidden under the flowerpot by the door. He unlocked the door and stepped inside, inhaling the sweet lilac fragrance of her house. Roy set the laundry basket on her couch and glanced at the clock: 0502. A sly grin came unto his face.

"I've got time. She wouldn't know anyways."

Roy took out a black, lacy bra out of the basket and smirked. "Who knew Hawkeye wore these kinds of things?" he mumbled to himself. He put it on his chest and tried to hook on the clasp, which he found very hard to do. How do women do these things? After a while, he gave up and interested himself in her panties. Taking one out of the basket, he put it on his head, tufts of his black hair coming out of the leg holes and grinned goofily. He grabbed another one, he held it out in front of him and stretched the garter of waistband. Using it like a rubber band, he flung it across the room. He seemed very entertained with this act. As Roy turned back to the basket, the lock on the door slowly clicked. The garment on his head must have muffled his hearing, because, apparently, he did not hear it. Roy turned around and the underwear flew from his hands and hit Riza squarely in the face.

If Riza wasn't pissed, she would've been laughing at the sight before her. Roy was standing in the middle of her living room, her bra on his chest, and her panty on his head. The dumb look on his face was priceless. It was filled with utter shock and embarrassment. Just realizing the position he was in, Roy gave a weak smile. "Um… I was just checking if they were clean?"

"I'll give you five seconds. One… two…"

"Shit." Roy, realizing she wasn't joking earlier, gulped and ran out the door.

The whole neighborhood wondered what on earth they were up to when they saw the famed Flame Alchemist, with a bra on his chest and underwear on his head, running away from the guns and wrath of Riza Hawkeye.

Yeah... this one's kind of long, but I enjoyed writing this. Please read and review or else you will be the one who will be facing Riza's guns.