Sorry it's taken so long. A version of this was sent to my beta but has yet to be sent back but I've added a few pages more and with my psychology exam Friday and the fact that I haven't revised for it at all. I need distressing and what other way to distress than to read you lovely reviews. And remember I respond by email! I'm sorry if I haven't replied yet, I shall do it first thing in the morning. Enjoy the chapter.

Disclaimer: don't own it.

Warning: sadness ahead folks.and its unbeted

Chapter 6

Sitting on the bed in the guest room, Hermione flexed her bare feet in the soft cream carpet that covered the floor. Her hands smoothed out the plain white crisp sheets that covered the single bed. The room was boring to say the least, her bag sat against the side table next to the bed waiting for her to unpack them in the wardrobe which was against the far side wall. The room was different shades of white, an innocent colour. It didn't seem right for such colours be used in his home. A tear trickled down her cheek as thoughts of him entered her mind.

She hasn't spoke to him since it happened, as soon as they returned to Hogwarts some four hours ago she had retired to her room and sat on the bed lost in a word she had created for herself. It was all a big mistake. Hermione poked her flat stomach once again; she had been doing so every few minutes, to check that it was still real, and that there was still his baby inside her. Another tear fell, she was trapped. Stuck in this situation until the child was born. Poking her stomach again resent flashed through her. Not for the child but for herself. How could she be so stupid as to sign the contract? It was his entire fault. She hated him, she didn't want to fall in love with him no more, didn't want to be part of the child's life. How could she now? It was ruined and all because he was an impatient arsehole.

Hermione lifted her hand away as she heard him enter the room, he had not knocked. She promised herself she wouldn't look at him. Promised herself to not be weak. He had promised it would happen in her time, when she was ready. She had told him she wasn't ready, didn't want it to happen so soon. Fathers a name he hasn't earned yet, he was just a child with a temper.

"I've brought you some soup; I thought it will help settle your stomach abit. How are you feeling? You're not in any pain are you?" His voice was low and his feet made a soft padding noise as he walked up to her bed and placed the tray on the bedside table.

"I'm fine. Thank you for the soup." Hermione stared at his feet, they wasn't that far away from her. She would just look at his feet until he left. She closed her eyes and waited for the tears to leave her eyes, willed them not to fall.

"It's the least I can do. The Healer gave me some vitamins potions for you to take at every meal time. You should take one after you've eaten." Hermione heard him ruffle within his robes; she guessed he was getting the potion. All movement stopped for a short while until Snape moved to put the object he got from he's robe on the table next to the soup. "I guess you're feeling tired from your journey and the trip earlier. I shall leave you to your supper and return for the bowl later, you should rest."

"Ok." Hermione answered. Silence followed for a brief moment until Snape sighed and left the room. Hermione looked at the door after she heard it close; he hadn't said anything about her not looking at him, maybe he believed her to be tired. She looked over to the table and there next to the lamp was a bowl of soup and a vial. She was too worn out to eat at the moment. Moving to lie down on the bed, she rested her head on the pillow and stroked her stomach once more. She didn't feel hungry at all, how could she eat with his child inside her. Closing her eyes, she ignored the inviting smell of the hot soup and fell to sleep.

He had waked her up after an hour wanting to know why she hadn't touched her soup. He sounded worried and annoyed. Placing a warming spell on the soup for her he stayed until she had finished it. "You've got to eat three meals a day Hermione. Otherwise the baby won't have the nutrients to develop fully. From now on you will have all meals in my present; I won't have your stupidity damaging my child."

Hermione stayed quiet as she finished the meal and drank the most horrible tasting potion without pulling a face at its aftertaste. Then she waited for him to leave, she hadn't fought back when he called her stupid for not eating, hadn't even lifted her chin. She wanted to be left alone so she could woe in the fact that all this is the biggest mistake of her life. As if hearing her silent plea Snape gathered the remnants of the meal and potion and left the room after a spoken wish that she had a goodnight which was not returned by Hermione.

The following three weeks had Hermione seated in the kitchen with Snape at all meals, marking the first years essays and reading about the Wolfsbane potion as that was the first potion she was going to learn. Hermione only spoke when spoken too and didn't question why she was making the hardest potion for a potions master to brew in her first month. Once allowed to go to her room after finishing the third meal of the day and having the third vial of the day, Hermione would seethe at the Potions master and the child in her stomach. Sorrow, anger and hate were all what she felt. A child was a gift so why didn't she feel happy? Why didn't she have the glow of a mother to be?

It was three weeks and five days after the fertilization of the child she had come to loath that Hermione was faced with a rather angry and annoyed Potions Master. Thoughts of what she could have done wrong flew through her head, he hadn't looked this mad at her since she had dropped the dragon's blood on the floor when she was helping him with Remus' next batch. Even then he had left the room and not faced her with his anger. Hoping that he would do the same tonight she tried to walk past him in the middle of the living room in anticipate of going to her room until supper.

"I don't think so Miss Granger, you're staying here and we're going to talk." Snape pointed at the couch for her to sit down. Which she did quietly. "Why are you acting as if you're forced to be here? I've seen the resentment in your eyes. Why?"

"It's nothing, just hormones." Hermione spoke sweetly. She really wanted to go to her room; she had been having cramps all day. She was too stressed out; a nice hot bath would soothe her muscles. "I've been all over the place these past weeks."

"Hormones?" Snape quirked an eyebrow and moved to rest against the mantel surrounding the fire. Turning to face her again, resting his elbow on the edge of the side he spoke "Bullshit."

"It's nothing."

"Stop lying! I have tired to make you comfortable, tried to make you at least care about something. I have been met with a zombie since you have arrived; tell me so I can fix it." Snape stretched out his arms towards Hermione. "I don't want you to be unhappy while you stay here. Merlin knows I would soon kill myself."

"Really, I'm fine. There's nothing a matter." Hermione answered through gritted teeth, she was beginning to lose her calm as he carried on. If he truly wanted her to be happy then he wouldn't have forced this on her. He should have kept his word. Then it would have been all happy and fine. She wouldn't hate the thing growing inside her, wouldn't hate the man before her. She could have fallen in love with him. It was her plan after all. There he stood blaming her for why the situation was the one that it is. Blaming her for hating them so. It was not her fault. It was his, all his. Not her. His voice carried on speaking about how he only wanted to do what best for her and the child, how he has sacrificed so much for them. Why the cheeky fucking bastard—"Shut the fuck up! I hate you! I hate what you've made me into it! It's your entire fault! I hate your child! I wish it wasn't there. You are to blame! I've tried not to say anything, to keep quiet so I could get through this as quickly as possible; I've done what you've asked me. Why cant you just leave me be!"

Snape stood still, no emotion showed on his face. Hermione sat and let her breathing return to normal. She had to admit she did feel a lot better now she's shouted at him.

"What have I done?" The question left his lips with out any emotion behind it.

"You've broken my trust." It was spoken quietly.

"Broken your trust?"

"Yes, you promised I wouldn't have to do it straight away, promised that I could choose when it happen. You took my trust and spat in it!" Her anger was rising again and it wasn't helping the fact that the small of her back was starting to hurt more; it must be the way she was sitting. "It was the only thing that I counted on to do this. I thought I could trust you. Why do you want a child so much to cast away my own feelings?"

"I don't know if you've noticed Miss Granger but I'm not a very caring person! Your feelings mean nothing to me."

"Nothing?" Hermione asked the pain was becoming more intense and she felt it move to the front of her stomach as well. She needed to get to her room and lie down.

"Nothing." Snape noticed how her hands griped onto the cushions of the couch more, it was obvious he was making her angry, good; it would help snap some sense in the silly chit. Maybe it was the hormones that were helping to send her crazy. He's fault, honestly, she's going quite mad.

"Then why are we having this conversation in the first place? If you didn't care you wouldn't want to know why I hate you so much. You wouldn't care that I was unhappy." She spoke through gritted teeth, the pain was increasing at a rate that would have her crippled in moments, something was wrong.

"It is in the interest for the child to make sure you are comfortable and happy, nothing else." Snape straightened the front of his robe while standing taller. He was above this petty tit-for-tat.

"In that case I'm going to my room." Standing up she gritted her teeth at the pain, her legs left week and she could feel the white spots creep in to her sight. Beads of sweat were forming as she made the journey to her door. Once inside she could go to sleep, she told her self.

"Hermione!" Snape's voice sounded worried. Turning around slowly Hermione faced him to speak.

"What?"

Snape didn't say anything but he was pointing to the couch she was sitting on moments before. Looking towards it Hermione heard Snape speak. "Its blood."

"Shit." Hermione saw the dark red patch and began to panic, what was happening? She was bleeding? What about the baby? Was it ok?

"We need to get you to Poppy at once, your losing the child." Snape rushed to her side and Hermione allowed him to support her. "Are you in pain?"

"Lots." She spoke through gritted teeth.

"Why didn't you tell me? When did it start?" Snape spoke as he moved them to the hearth; she was in no state to walk the thousands of stairs.

"Because we were fighting." Hermione replied. "I have had cramps all day, its just got worse."

"Don't worry, it will be ok. Our baby will be ok." Snape threw the floo powder into the newly lit fire and carried Hermione through.

0000

Hermione was laid on the starched sheets of a Hogwarts medical bed dressed in a hospital gown. Madame Pomfrey was using her wand to scan her stomach. Severus was sat in the chair next to the bed. He felt out of place. He didn't know how to act or what to do, was he meant to take her hand and offer sweet words of comfort? His heart ached at the prospect of losing his child. Hermione was still in a lot of pain, she couldn't be given pain killers. It was too risky. He was worried about her. During their working together in the Order he had felt he knew her better–or so he flattered himself- than most other's.

He had realized that he was partially if not fully- for Hermione's condition at the moment. He had wanted to make it up to her for forcing her to be fertilized so soon. He needed to explain to her. He needed to tell her every thing. Including why it was believed that Albus Dumbledore was killed in the finial battle.

"I'm sorry Hermione, the child is lost." Poppy voice broke into Severus heart as sharp as a silver stake would. "It gets worse. The sack is imbedded firmly into the bottom of your womb. It would be put passed me if it wasn't because of those potions they gave you at 'Mares-for-hire'. There is two ways of removing the sack. Magic or manually. The decision is yours."

"The manually way." Severus spoke up.

"Manually? Why?" Poppy looked surprised to hear Severus speak for Hermione as well as choosing the muggle way.

"Magic will affect her hormones, prolonging the period for when she can be impregnated again." Severus state. He looked at Hermione to find she was staring daggers at him. "No painkiller either. The affects her chemical balance. She must be perfect."

"Do you have any idea how painful this is going to be?" Hermione cried. "I can not believe you are doing this to me!"

"As much as I wish you no pain, the child must be born as soon as possible." Severus tried to reason but he could see it had little effect as Hermione was shaking her head.

"No fucking way. I have suffered enough for you!"

"You have no choice again Miss Granger. Please agree to this so we won't have to suffer the last three week or the same outcome again." Severus squeezed the bridge of his nose as he heard Hermione rant about the last thing he had said. Ok, maybe it was the wrong thing to say being as the miscarriage had only just happened but she didn't understand.

"You can fuck your stupid contract up your pale boney arse! If you ever, and I mean ever, think I will have your fucking child inside of me you've got another thing coming!" Hermione had started to sit up on the bed reading to push her self of it onto her feet so she could go and pack her things at once. Getting a degree in potions was the last thing he wanted.

"Severus!" Poppy shouted while turning to comfort Hermione. "Hermione! What do you think you're doing! You can't leave here!"

"Oh yes I bloody can!" Hermione left intense pain as she stood from the bed. It shot up her spine as she grabbed her cloak from the unoccupied chair and then was nearly knocked her off her feet as it speed down her legs as she pulled her cloak on top of the gown. She was not going to waste time getting dress. She looked at Severus and noticed he just sat there with no expression on his face, god she hated it when he looked at her like that, anyone would think he was a chimp. Slipping into her shoes Hermione left the infirmary as quickly as she could do being as she was in so much pain. Her adrenaline was helping her keep on her feet but hot tears blurred her vision. Once outside in the corridor she took off at a slow jog to get to the dungeon.

Severus still remanded in the chair as Poppy was ranting at him to go after her. Figuring he wasn't going to go Poppy went to go after her herself. "Stop! Don't bother."

"What? She's in need of medical attention Severus! We can not let her leave!"

"She wont, she will get to her room and then realize how much having an apprentice with me really means to her."

"You really are an unfeeling bastard!" Poppy snapped as she ran from the room and after Hermione.

Severus still remanded in the chair and was weighing the options of going to work on some potions when he heard Poppy scream for him. The silly woman would soon regret calling him a bastard; he knew she would need his help in catching the Gryffindor twit.

Severus lazily exited the infirmary and walked down the corridor at a pace that suited him. He could hear Poppy shouting for him. It was only when he turned the corner and saw Poppy crouched over Hermione's unmoving body did he decide to walk abit faster.

"She's lost more blood Severus!"

00000

Hermione eyes burned as she opened them. She was back on an infirmary bed, she noticed. Had she not made it back to the dungeons? The pain was only a slight ache now. Something had changed. Looking from the titled ceiling she went to seeing what was surrounding her. Madam Pomfrey was standing next to her; at least Snape wasn't in the room. "What happened?"

"You collapsed; the pressure was too much for you. You lost a lot of blood and the sac." Her voice was soft and somewhat comforting.

"I'm still leaving. I don't deserve this."

"I know dear but this is something you've got to talk about with Severus." Poppy seated her self on the side of the bed and began brushing Hermione's hair back wither hand. During the war Poppy had witness many deaths of her friends, most of them while in her hands. "He's sitting outside the room. I've moved you into a private room, I'm afraid you've got a short stay here."

"Don't send him in. I can't bear to talk to him now." A tear slipped down her cheek.

"Then speak to me dear. Tell me." Poppy smiled as she wiped away the stray tear.

"It's just so hard. I mean I hated him. I wasn't ready. I felt like an alien with the child growing in me but as soon as it was there, it was apart of me. I connected with the child; they gave me that link to him."

"All miscarriages are hard to deal with. Lets just hope yours will be less suffering as you wasn't the biological mother. I'm here for you Hermione." Poppy bent down to kiss Hermione on the forehead but was stopped as the sound of a hurt student entered the infirmary. "I had hoped it would be a quite day today. Well no rest for the wicked. Call for me if you need too."

"Thank you."

"It's my job." Poppy left the room and shut the door behind her. Once alone Hermione attempted to sit up. Finding she could, she noticed she could see Snape's form outside the window, thank Merlin he was facing away. Moving the cover away from her stomach Hermione rubbed her still flat stomach. "I didn't hate you. It wasn't your fault."

Hermione felt guilty, she had wished the child away and it had happened. She felt empty dnow she knew they weren't inside her. For the past three weeks she had spent most of her time cursing the child. Now they were gone. She was alone. She regretted not loving the child; she had had something of Severus inside her, growing. She had loved Severus. She should have loved the piece of him that she had had. But now it was too late. "I'm sorry."

"Me too." Hermione looked up to see Severus standing in the door way. She had been too wrapped up in her thoughts; she didn't even notice him enter. "We have to talk!"

"There's no need. I'm leaving."

"You can't."

"That's not up to you to decide. You need to stop making my decisions for me."

"It is important that you stay."

"Why is it Severus? Why? After the way you have treated me today, why should I even bother to listen to you."

"Because Albus will die if you don't bare me a child soon."

"He is already dead!" Hermione screamed. Was he going to lie to her just so he could shove his child inside her?

"He is not! He was hit with a curse in the final battle. It's eating away at him, he is hidden with Hogwarts. I have spent the last year trying to find a cure. His only chance is a designer baby. I owe him this much to save him!" Severus had walked into the room fully. He was at her side, sitting on the edge of the bed so he was eye level wither. "Hermione. I need you to help me."

"How can he be alive? What is the curse?" Hermione felt uncomfortable with him sitting so close.

"It is one Voldemort created when he was in his prime. I admit I don't understand it completely, but from what I can gather it is draining him of everything, from his power to stopping his hair from growing."

"How will a designed baby help?"

"He needs a life force to share from. One that is from his bloodline."

"Bloodline?"

"Yes, I am related to Albus. He is a very decedent relative and our blood link is not strong enough. I have found a way to alter my semen so that the DNA would be solely of the kind I have similar to him." Severus spoke with such passion and determinism that Hermione was reminded of the Severus she had once worked with.

"How is Albus now?" How could she not believe what he was saying, they had knew from Severus' days as a Deatheater that Voldemort was working on improving some DIY creations. Her mind had caught on him saying semen; does that mean that he…in to a cup? Now was not the time to think about those things, Albus was still alive, she could help bring him back.

"He had to be frozen, the curse was working at such a rate I could not think of anything else to do. I don't even know the name of the curse." Severus knew Hermione would understand why this was such an important matter for him, hell it was important for most people.

"I will do it. As long as you change the contract to suit me better."

"This is not a time to negotiate."

"All I want is for you to treat me as an equal. As a part of this child, well, the child-to-be. I want to be part of the picture. Let me make my own decisions, I will do what is best for the child and myself." Hermione took a deep breath. "I want to save Albus."

"Then we shall work as a team. As equals." Severus sighed with relief. It felt good to final tell her why the child was important. He felt he was on a ground with her that he had never been on before.

"Yes." Hermione said smiling. She took Severus hand with her own. "We will be Severus and Hermione."

A death of a love one, even if you realize this love or not, always opens your eyes to how you often take things for granted. But new bridge's can be built, new loved ones can be found and together you will learn to be that little bit more thankful for what you have.

I've just got 3 exams left and then i may be starting a job fingers crossed so updates should be more frequent.