Xander walked out of the library muttering to himself, "Stupid women. Stupid librarians. Girl comes in demands to be married, insults my friends, beats up one of them, I tell her the damn truth, and the fake macho wimp goes all teary-eyed and suddenly I'm the bad guy. 'You could have brought that a little less harsh'. Henh. The girl wouldn't understand anything /but/ harsh, clinging to me like I'm some kind of favorite toy. She should be lucky I chalked it up to cultural difference, and I didn't consider her insane and put her out her and our misery."
Thus Xander stepped into the men's bathroom, before the other insane women could charge him again. He stepped in front of the mirror and looked at himself. Ever since he smashed his hand through a rock for the first time, and Genma and Ranma actually encouraged him, and not talked him down like his father did, his confidence in himself had been boosted. He remembered being Lexa in the Bronze, Buffy's assessment of Jonathan's lack of confidence, and Willow's reaction. Like he had been; he had decided then and there he'd do for Willow what Ranma and Genma had done for him, even if it meant she'd focus on him, and his chances with Buffy diminished. Of course that was before he had a whole horde of other women after him; one Amazon, one rich bitch. Three of them now, except the one he was interested in. Part of him regretted that decision, but only for a short while; it was fantastic seeing his childhood friend having some confidence in himself. He splashed some water in his face and looked at his female self. "Damn it," she said out loud. "Greatest damn blessing I could ever have hoped for, and now this crap as part of it. 'Multiple orgasms' why the /hell/ did I say that out loud?"
She looked at himself for a few moments, and sighed. She let the warm water flow, waiting, and said, "No sense hiding, they all know how to turn me back and are willing to burn me to a crisp to do so. Aargh!" She used the warm water, closed the faucet and then he left again!
Outside casually leaning against the outside wall was a thirty-plus-year-old Amazon woman. "Jusenkyo. Not only is he strong, but he cherishes his female side too, without becoming a gibbering emotional fool. What a man. Hmm, greatest blessing, eh?"
-----
Buffy slowly got to her knees, grabbed the back of her head and shook it to get rid of the drowsiness. "Did someone catch the number on that truck that ran me over?" Buffy muttered as she slowly stood up.
Cordelia came back to life from the shocked fear she had at watching that girl beat Buffy with one move. She was determined suddenly, and went over to the counter. Right in front of Giles she smashed her fists, and said, "You will train me!"
"I beg your pardon?" Giles answered, still a little perturbed at watching a normal girl beat a Slayer with such impetuous ease. He could understand the whole 'use Buffy's strength against her' routine that Xander had displayed earlier, but this girl had beat Buffy with superior skill, superior speed, and superior strength. It was unnatural.
"You will train me, old man!" Cordelia threatened with a pointed finger. "It's obvious if I want Xander, I'm going to have to be able to beat that skank, and that means training!"
"But I know nothing of that chi business that allows them to develop such strength," Giles answered her with a confused face. Jenny, Buffy, and Willow looked at the exchange with some interest. "I'm afraid I'm not of much help."
Cordelia narrowed her eyes and added, "Don't worry about that; I'll get books on chi and tai chi subjects. You just be there to teach me the basics and guide me through it. Or is a trainer of Slayers not good enough to train an ordinary beauty queen?"
"Well . . ."
"Hell no!" Buffy exclaimed enraged. "He'll be busy training me six time as much as before! He'll have no time for a rich bitch like you!"
"Shut up, Summers! I'll pay for the lessons, Giles, if that's necessary!" Cordelia stated with a growl. "How does a hundred bucks per lesson sound?"
Giles eyebrows raised, that was quite some money. "Uh," Willow piped up, and said, "Wouldn't it be cheaper to go to a dojo?"
Cordelia looked behind her at the redhead, and then said, "You're right, thanks Willow." Then she was off. Giles got angry at Willow, but took a deep breath to calm himself. A kiss from his girlfriend on his right cheek calmed him down completely.
"After school, Giles, we're training like we've never trained before!" Buffy stated and then she pulled Willow along to their class.
-----
Somewhere else in Sunnydale
"I failed, mother. I could not seduce future husband, I disgraced," Lotion stated with infinite sadness, a few last tears slowly rolling down her cheeks.
"Ah, do not worry so much, Lotion," her mother told her with a smile. "You heard him, he did not outright deny you. American men are different, they take their time searching for their mate. Perhaps a wise course of action. If push comes to shove, you should simply do as he asks. Date him, and show him you're the best woman for him."
"Yes, you be right as usual," Lotion said taking a bow.
"To do that, the first thing you need to do is learn English better. An accent and some occasional error isn't a problem, but you seem to be unable to pronounce a single sentence correctly," her mother stated, looking at her. Lotion took a bow. "Best place to do that, /and/ to be closer to your future husband, would be to go to the same high school as he goes to."
"High school?" Lotion asked a little shocked.
"Yes, it seems the husband you've chosen won't be moving to live in our village easily either, so we'll undoubtedly be here quite a while, we require a source of income," her mother stated with a calm voice then smiled. Lotion swallowed, she'd seen that smile. "It seems they have not yet tasted Ramen in this place, or any foods with 3,000-year-old secret Amazon recipes, or any other authentic Asian foods, with the exception of a few mass market well-known dishes. They could use a restaurant."
"I see," Lotion said, slumping a bit. "Quick retrieval of husband and return home impossible."
"And that would only mean your husband isn't as strong as he appeared to be, but first, that might happen yet after all, at the very least, it will be a good test of his meddle," her mother said.
"Hiya! Mother! No test meddle!" Lotion exclaimed in fright. "Last guy test meddle, in hospital with broken legs, and broken ribs, gibbering ununderstandble things for two months before leaving village broken man! No test meddle Xander!" Her mother just grinned. Lotion jerked back and then ran, saying, "Must warn precious husband!"
"That will do him no good, Lotion," her mother said with a smile.
-----
Xander was in between classes and walked alongside Buffy and Willow. "So, Xander . . . uhm . . ." Willow said twisting her fingers, trying to muster up the courage to ask him out on a date, ". . . nice weather we're having, right?"
Xander looked at her, and answered, "I guess . . ."
"Well," Buffy said with a smile and asked. "How about we three go out to the bronze tonight? Just us three, and the real you Xander, having some fun." Xander give a non-committal sound as he clasped his hands behind his back. "You know, without super luscious girls, queen bitches of high schools, and those unfeminist . . ."
"Nihau, Xander!"
Buffy's face crunched up in annoyance. "That," she mumbled.
"Came to warn precious husband!" Lotion said with great haste, making Willow and Buffy's face crunch up with anger and hate. "Great danger coming! You must hurry!"
"Great danger?" Xander asked her, and then shrugged. "What else is new?"
"No, hurry, run, hide! This is really, really bad! Fearful dragon coming!" Lotion said, and suddenly her eyes went wide and took a step back.
"Huh?" Xander and Willow said.
"She means me."
The three of them turned around and looked at an older version of Lotion. She had her arms folded across her chest . . . actually she had them folded under her chest, pushing up her breasts making them look even more impressive then they were normally. "Whoa," Xander said, taking her in slowly. Willow gave him an annoyed nudge. "Oh, right, who are you, again? She said something about you being a dragon?"
The woman smiled. "She Deo!" Lotion exclaimed in fear for her love. "She my mother! She wish to test your meddle."
Willow's, Xander's and Buffy's eyes widened in shock. Now that they looked better they could see some resemblance. Same color hair, her face had a few similar curves, but like most people Lotion resembled her unknown father more. For one thing their eye-colors were different. Where Lotion's were green, Deo's were a striking deep blue, and had a less rounded face. She was just as attractive as Lotion though.
"Indeed," Deo stated with a smile. "I was forced to choose a husband from the dim-witted, weaklings amongst our tribe. I will make sure my daughter will not share the same fate! She will marry a /real/ man!"
Willow and Buffy looked dumbfounded at the proclamation, and so did many students who looked at the shocking events. "And how are you going to do that?" Xander asked casually, Lotion shook her head.
"By defeating you and making you acknowledge Amazon martial arts is superior," Deo lied casually.
"What!?" Xander said in shock.
"What is going on here!? Why aren't you kids getting to class!?" the voice of the troll-like principal Snyder screeched and appeared next to Deo.
"Shut up, fool," Deo commented and smacked her fist on the upside of his head, and he slumped into unconsciousness. Everyone cheered in happiness. "Now let us, fight."
"I can't," Xander said with a big smile.
"What?" Deo asked shocked, and Lotion looked equally at Xander.
Xander shook his head and said, "I will not hit a woman unless I absolutely have too, besides you just bashed Snyder unconscious. You're my personal her now! I can't fight my hero!"
"Oh," Deo said looking at the unconsciousness man. "Well, then I'll have to make you." Deo jumped forward and Xander went to defend himself. One punch hit his gut, and a follow up smashed across his face and he launched back along the corridor. He managed a somersault in the air, but still didn't allow him to land properly. He landed with his feet but his momentum backward was too great, he simply dropped to the ground and tumbled painfully a few times.
Xander shook his head, and then looked at a serene Deo, standing just before the shocked three girls. "That's it, now you've done it," Xander said and ran at her with a roar. He brought his fist back, threw it, and stopped right before he hit Deo. He looked at Deo, Deo looked at him, Willow, Buffy and Lotion looked at the two with a lot of apprehension. Xander blinked and then straightened up, saying, "Nope, sorry, not good enough."
Deo grinned, and then snaked out a hand to Xander's crotch. Xander watched shocked as she patted his balls, and said, "What's the matter? Don't have the balls to fight me?"
Xander's face went slack for a moment, and then grimaced up with rage, saying, "That does it, /BITCH/!! Now you made me /have/ to!" With an enraged roar Xander threw a right punch at the woman's face that was only a centimeter below his own; Amazons! With casual ease Deo twisted sideways and made Xander miss. Before she could use his arm to pull him along he pulled it back while he twisted himself. Instead though, Deo lashed out a foot, hit him in the gut and he flew back a meter where he crashed against the wall cracking it.
"Xander!" Willow, Buffy and Lotion exclaimed with shock and concern. Buffy remembered how she was knocked out almost the same way an hour and a half earlier. Xander though grimaced and got up.
"You're going down," he said and attacked with a kick to Deo's gut. She twisted aside and immediately turned the kick in a roundhouse kick toward where Deo had gone and she pulled her head back, making Xander miss. "I /will/ defeat you, devil woman!" Xander proclaimed and continued with a rapid combo of his muscular arms and legs, which Deo easily avoided or parried with her hands. She backed up and beckoned him mockingly on. Xander tightened his teeth together as he followed her out of the school, running. A moment later the three girls ran after them as well.
Xander followed the woman out on the grass and everyone looked at the spectacle. Deo stopped, and Xander grinned. He jumped forward high, made a somersault, and as he kicked out towards the woman he said, "I have you now." Just in time, Deo split in two as she laughed.
"What!?" Xander exclaimed, his eyes widening in shock as he passed in between the women. He landed and turned around and watched as Deo started laughing truly evilly. Chills ran down a lot of people's spines as they heard it and watched as both Deos split apart again, the laugh now coming four times overlapping. The four Deos now split up three ways, two coming our of the middle, and stopping the laugh, Deo said, "Ancient Amazon secret technique Cat Curiosity!"
"Oh, no!" Lotion exclaimed in horror as Xander was surrounded by a circle of Deos, who then started running around him more and more rapidly, eventually simply floating. "This technique no beaten even by great warrior king Yung Sang! Xander doesn't stand a chance!"
Now the Deos were nothing but a blur, and Xander looked around with gritted teeth. He could barely see one whole Deo, just blurs, how could he figure out which was the real one? Or were they all real? "Okay," he said and simply charged forward. He threw a punch which went straight through the blurred Deos. A fist hit him hard across his cheek and he staggered back to the middle of the circle. A kick hit him in the back, and before he could even stagger forward another fist hit him on his right side. "Aah!" he yelled out in pain, as Deo's evil laughter once again sounded across the school grounds, eliciting chills.
"We have to help, Xander!" Willow said in fear and Xander seemingly completely out clashed. "If some legendary warrior couldn't beat this." Buffy nodded and was ready to step forward; saving her friends was in her element.
"No!" Lotion said, putting a hand in front of Buffy to stop her. "This Xander's fight. Besides, you'll only get hurt, and make mother angry, and punishment for Xander greater."
Xander had gotten several more kicks and punches to him. Damn how could he beat this, seeing the Deos twisting around him in his mind's eye. So fast, so . . . "Right!" Xander said, and roared as he charged to his right straight for the twisting Deos.
"Ha, ha, ha! That won't work, haven't you learned!" Deos' voices sounded ready to hit Xander again.
All Deos' eyes widened in shock as Xander suddenly jumped backward screwing around his axis. He kicked down, just in case, and landed on the ground directly in the path of the illusionary Deos who went straight through him. He straightened and threw his fist straight into the opposite direction of the moving Deos. An instant later a Deo jumped in the air, just in front of Xander. "There," Xander said jumping up after her. Deo looked in shock as Xander's left leg hit her straight in the gut, doubling her over. ". . . moving to fast to do anything else," Xander said, and then turned around, ramming his right foot across Deo's right cheek and making her twist away from him. He finished, ". . . the one avoiding the fist, is the real one."
Xander landed, and so did Deo, the fake Deos fading away. Deo touched her sore cheek, which was sporting a graze wound. Willow, Buffy and Lotion looked astonished at the outcome. Lotion then swooned, and squealed, "What a warrior! What a husband he'll be!" Willow's and Buffy's eyes darkened at that.
Deo looked at her hand carrying a few slivers of skin, and thought, -I should have made the fakes jump as well.- Deo then grinned brightly, and laughed jovially, "Incredible, you're the first man to be have managed to hit me in thirty-nine years; that's when I was born." Xander wanted to speak, but Deos smiling face continued, "But this is not enough, Harris. If you wish to avoid the fate of marrying my daughter . . ."
"I will /not/ marry your daughter, get that through your thick head! Even if you beat me up and tie me up, and drag me in front of a priest, I /still/ will not marry her!" Xander told the woman in anger.
"Ah, if only I weren't married myself," Deo said batting her eyelashes at Xander.
"You'd end up in jail, you demon witch!" Xander hissed at her in anger. "I'm not and adult yet. Older than eighteen with someone younger than eighteen equals prison for the one older!"
"Really? Americans need glasses then, because you are most definitely a man," Deo said licking her lips against as she took in Xander's form.
"Mother!" Lotion exclaimed both in shock, anger, and mortification, as Buffy and Willow watched with dropped jaws as the older Amazon was casually flirting with their best friend - and romantic interest.
Deo grinned, and said, "No matter, you have by no means beat me, Xander Harris! And the fate I have in mind, is far worse then being beaten or tied up." Suddenly she shot forward, and poked her right index and middle finger hard into Xander's left pelvic bone just above where his leg fit. At the same time she hit the same point on his right pelvic bone with her left fingers.
"AAH!" Xander exclaimed, unable to defend himself against the suddenly fast movement.
"NO!" Lotion, Willow, and Buffy exclaimed in horror. Xander staggered back two steps and then steadied, checking things out.
"Within three days, Xander, you'll be begging me to marry, Lotion! Bye, bye!" Deo told him and then jumped high and far away.
Xander whipped around, and looked at Lotion, asking, "What did she do?"
"I don't know," Lotion said, whimpering. "I've never seen that technique." Xander groaned in frustration.
-----
"Eat up, girls! Fresh pork, with potatoes, and red cabbage with apple sauce! Straight from my very own kitchen," Xander proclaimed with pride, putting the plates with food in front of his friends sitting at the table. Buffy and Willow looked at the food skeptically as Xander put his own plate at his own place, and watched as his girl friends took careful sniffs of the food. It smelled pretty good; would it taste good to? "Why aren't you eating?" Xander asked perturbed, and then his eyes widened. "WHY IN BLAZES DO YOU THINK I CAN'T COOK!?!"
Buffy and Willow shrank back a little, and then Buffy said with a small voice, "Well, you're a guy, and . . ."
"FOR EVERY THOUSAND MALE CHEF COOKS THERE'S ONLY ONE FEMALE!!" Xander screamed in anger. Nobody messed with his cooking! "I HAD TO COOK REGULARLY SINCE I WAS EIGHT BECAUSE MY MOTHER WAS TOO DRUNK TO DO IT! NOW/ EAT/!!
"Okay, okay, okay!" Willow and Buffy both said scarily. Quickly they grabbed knife and fork and took a bit of the red cabbage. They both looked at each other, and then chewed tastefully before swallowing it down. They took some potatoes and gravy. Willow ate that, while Buffy put a piece of meat to it. They ate and looked with enjoyment again.
"Mmh," Buffy said.
"Oh, yeah, this is delicious," Willow commented with a grin and continued.
"You know that, Willow, you were close enough to know I cooked, so how come?" Xander asked deeply betrayed.
"I knew you cooked, I just never thought you managed anything good," Willow said with a smile, and watched Xander's expression darken. "Sorry," she said sheepishly.
"Xander, can I have a coke?" Buffy asked a little afraid he might think she was getting it because she thought his cooking was bad.
"Sure, Buff," Xander said, and got up. He went over to the fridge and opened it. He reached in and just as hand reached the threshold of air and refrigerated air he went stiff. His teeth started clattering, and his entire body turned blue, then he keeled over sideways. He stayed twitching on the ground.
"XANDER!" both of his friends screamed out in horror and ran over.
"Xander, Xander, are you alright?" Willow asked him concerned checking him out all over, also using her hands to feel for obvious injuries.
With clattering teeth, Xander managed to push out, "No, c-c-c-coold."
"Huh?" Buffy wondered looking around. "But it's warm."
Indeed it was warm and Xander's blue color was already clearing up. A minute later he sat up, flexing his body; nothing was the matter. "That was weird, Xan," Willow said as he got up.
Xander nodded, and then Deo appeared on his balcony. "You!" Xander hissed as Lotion's mother stepped through the door with an evil smile.
"Indeed me," Deo said with an evil smile, and pointed at a flask hanging by a necklace around her neck. "This is the antidote, and I'll only give it to you, after you've married my daughter."
"What!? Antidote to what!?" Xander yelled in anger, stalking toward her.
"The Reverse Polar Bear technique," Deo stated with a huge grin.
"The what!?" all three teens said in confusion.
Deo grinned and said, "The polar bear is extremely resilient to pain. Hitting you're two special point on your pelvic bone as I did today, I disrupted you're chi flows. Now, the reverse from the polar bear holds for you: you can't even handle a tiny bit of cold without happening to you what just happened. Long term exposure to temperatures even as high as four degrees centigrade will kill you even."
Xander growled and said, "I'm not marrying Lotion, demon woman. California stays pretty warm all year through."
"Indeed," Deo said smiling serenely. "But think about it, no more refreshing drinks . . ." Xander shrugged. ". . . no more refreshing dives into a swimming pool . . ." Xander shrugged. ". . . no more going out on a rainy day without three-layers of water proof clothing . . ." Xander shrugged. ". . . and Jusenkyo victim: no more turning into a girl."
Xander's eyes widened. "You, you, horrible, devilish, evil, bitch! You can't do that to me! I /love/ being able to turn into a girl! You took away my greatest blessing!" Xander screamed out in shock, making Buffy and Willow look at each other with raised eyebrows.
"I know, that was the point," Deo stated with a smile.
Xander grumbled inside, and then lifted his arm. "I can take it!" Xander yelled and opened the cold water faucet in the kitchen. He moved his hand too it, and the moment his nail touched the outer edge of the stream he jerked back and went blue, teeth clattering. Then he keeled over again.
"Well, tata," Deo said and jumped from the balcony, yelling, "I'll expect you're 'I do' very soon!"
"Xander!" Willow and Buffy once again exclaimed concerned and went over to him.
A few minutes later he was back to normal again. "I will take that bitch apart and get that antidote!" Xander said with determination and stalked to the exit. He stopped after three steps and turned around to his friends. "Oh, shit, I don't know where she is!"
"We don't either," Willow told him.
"AARGH!!"
-----
Xander stalked across school grounds, grumbling profanities at Lotion and more so her mother. He didn't really look where he was going and he accidentally bumped Jack O'Tool, an bully upper classman. "Harris," O'Tool demanded.
"Hmm?" Xander said turned around, watching O'Tool fling around a butterfly knife.
"You will apologize, or I will cut you up," Jack demanded.
Xander raised his eyebrows, and then narrowed his gaze. "Give me that, you fool!" Xander said, grabbing the knife out of O'Tool's hands with ease. Jack looked shocked, and then more so when Xander's body started twitching and shuddering as if being on the north pole, dropping the metal knife, and then turning blue before keeling over.
"Shit man, what's wrong with you?" Jack O'Tool said fearfully. He quickly grabbed his knife and ran away.
Cordelia arrived with him a moment later, and she asked concerned as his color slowly cleared up, "Are you alright? What happened to you?"
Xander sat up, and said, "That devil bitch Deo."
"Huh?"
"Lotion's mother, she's worse than Lotion. When I get my hands on her . . ." Xander muttered.
"You'll do what?" that annoyingly, deceptively sweet voice asked.
Xander whipped around looked directly at the woman, the flask still around her neck. "Mine!" he hissed and made a grasp for the flask, and seemingly missed by a mile. "Huh?"
"Too slow, boy," she told him.
With a roar he made another pass, but Deo easily jumped backward out of the way. "You're three decades too young to beat me, Harris, you better marry my daughter," Deo told him with a huge smile. Xander growled. "Oh!" Deo said with a smile, lifting his finger. "Last night, I did not yet have an address where you can contact me to agree to marry Lotion, now I do." She handed a flyer over to Xander and one to Cordelia.
Xander read, Cordelia read out loud, "Authentic Chinese Amazon and other Asian food at the brand new Amazon Dragon Chinese restaurant. Taste Asian foods very little people in the western world have had the privilege of tasting. Multiple flavors of ramen. We deliver. Come enjoy the Amazon way!" Then there was an address. Cordelia folded open the flyer and found the menu wrapped inside, and she checked that out as well.
"If you excuse me, I have more flyers to pass out," Deo said and then jumped high to the school roof, throwing flyers left and right from the basket she was holding, yelling, "New authentic Amazon food! Come try it! Address on flyer! Menu included! We deliver!" She jumped onward further into Sunnydale.
"Restaurant!?" Xander exclaimed in frustration. The women were apparently planning on staying. "Aaargh!" He calmed down a bit, and said, "I need to get that antidote! Also number 59 seems quite tasty." Then he ran forward, intending to jump to the roof as well.
Snyder blocked the path, and said, "You will do no such thing Mr. Harris, you will stay in . . ." Xander's foot crashed into Snyder's face and he used the troll as a launching board. Snyder keeled over and fell to the floor. "I will call your parents!" he threatened from the ground.
"I'm emancipated!" he called back from the air.
Snyder's eyes widened, and then groaned, "NOOOOooo!"
"Where's Xander going!?" Buffy asked, as she and Willow arrived and watched Xander go.
Cordelia handed them the flyer, and he said, "He said something about an antidote and number 59 sounding tasty."
Buffy and Willow gave each other a look, and then ran away. "Summers! Rosenberg! Oh, I give up," Snyder said from the ground in irritation.
-----
Xander ran into the restaurant and found Deo cooking, and Lotion waiting tables. "Why hello customer, what can I help you with?" she asked Xander.
"I'll take one antidote, and one number 59," Xander told the sexy woman.
She smiled and said, "It won't go that easy. You'll have to pay for 59, but the antidote you'll have to get yourself."
"No problem," Xander said and reached over to the flask hanging by her neck. Deo seemed having no room to maneuver. Just as he was about to reach it though, Deo twisted her body and the flask was on the back of her neck. Xander grumbled. "Give!" he said reaching for the necklace around Deo's neck. "OW!" Xander yelled as a spatula hit his hands, a moment later he found himself flying out the door, crashing to the ground and tumbling onward in the busy shopping street of Sunnydale center. He growled as he got up, and charged back inside. A moment later he came flying back out with a groan of pain.
Buffy and Willow arrived and watched Xander go back inside, only to come flying out again with another painful groan. It happened again, and then another time. "Xander, this is useless," Willow said sadly. "She's too good."
"NO!" Xander said, and ran back inside, only to come flying back out.
Deo came walking out calmly, and told him, "You should listen to your friend, future son in law. There's no way you can even stay inside the restaurant, let alone get the antidote."
Xander grumbled and his eyes fell on a piece of paper mounted next to the door: 'Waiter/waitress wanted.' He pointed at the sign, and said, "I'll apply for the job."
Deo's eyes widened for a moment, and then turned to look at the sign. She smiled, and thought, -Smart too!- She nodded and said, "Ah, you're hired, Xander Harris, come on in and check out your waiter uniform."
-----
Cordelia, Willow, and Buffy sat at the table during lunch time watching. "I cannot believe he decided to wear /that/ just so he can turn into a girl again," Buffy muttered when she watched Xander, twinkles in her eyes. "I feel for him."
A woman gave Xander a slap on his ass. He halted for a moment, and then smiled at the woman as he placed their order rapidly on the their table.
"Uhhuh, I hope he gets to benefit from the friendship I'm displaying by watching him go through this debasement," Willow said, taking a bite from her 'ramen', and said, "Mmh."
"No you're not, you hypocrite," Cordelia answered her. "You're here to ogle Xander's naked chest, just like Buffy, just like me, and just like every other woman in this restaurant."
Indeed, all Xander was wearing was pants, socks, shoes, an apron in front of his crotch, and a butterfly tie. His chest and arms were naked. Buffy blushed and tried to sputter an explanation. Willow looked at Cordelia, growing red and sputtered, "I-I'm not . . . best f-f-friends do . . ." She slumped in defeat at Cordelia's intense gaze and nodded. "I'm evil," Willow muttered.
"Table six and eight, Harris!" Deo called and placed a finished big order.
"Yes, ma'am!" Xander called enthusiastically balancing five bowls of ramen. Three he brought to table six, and the other two he placed rapidly in front of a couple. "Bon appetite, ma'am, sir." And Xander went away the girl looking after him.
"Could you stare a little less? I'm right here," the guy asked gently.
The girl twisted her head violently, and with narrowed eyes she asked, "Did I complain when you dragged me to that topless restaurant last week? With /onlyfemale/ waitresses?" The guy swallowed nervously. "Stop complaining, and eat your food," she told him and he went to do that. She nodded with satisfaction.
Xander watched as Deo turned to her cooking, and had left the flask seemingly unattended. He reached for it rapidly, and just as he was about to grab it, a hot spatula crashed against his hand - the flask gone. "Order for table ten!" Deo called it.
-God damn it!- Xander thought nursing his hurt hand. "Table ten!" he cried out enthusiastically and took the order.
Lotion who was at the door let in a new set of customers from the long line as a different set left. "New customers at table twenty!" Deo called out as the customers sat down.
"Table twenty!" Xander called and practically danced over. "Can I take you're order, ma'ams?"
A few moments later he returned to counter, placed the dirty dishes down, and named the order, Deo casually nodded. She placed a new order on the counter, and said, "Table twenty-five!"
"Right," Xander said, as another employee took the dirty dishes to be washed, and watched with fascination how Xander kept the whole thing running like a giant show. Xander reached for the flask back around Deo's neck, and it suddenly flung up, wrapped around Xander's head and banged him on the counter.
"Table twenty-five," Deo calmly repeated.
"Twenty-five!" Xander said perkily, but with a grumble. He picked up the order on a larger plate, and smoothly went over to the table.
Buffy watched Xander, feeling his fate, and said, "This is so horrible. I can't watch this anymore." She casually kept her eyes glued to his muscular torso, along with Willow and Cordelia. Willow nodded in agreement but didn't stop watching either.
-----
At six, when Xander got off his shift a new male waiter came out to do the night shift, and he casually wore a blouse. Breathing heavily at the counter he said, "Hey! He doesn't have to!"
"He doesn't look as good as you do," Deo said with a smile, the flask still firmly around her neck.
"RAAAAAR!" Xander screamed in frustration. "You demon bitch, I'll find a way to get that flask, I promise."
Buffy and Willow came back into the restaurant at that time, and Deo answered, "You won't, not ever." Deo smiled and thought, -I might as well show him.- "Come, I'll show you why you will never beat me, you're just several decades too young," Deo said and beckoned him with her. Buffy and Willow looked at each other and followed.
They came out in the garden, and Deo made a quick campfire, then took some chestnuts from a bucked and dumped them in. "This is one of the most ancient Amazon techniques, future son in law, watch closely," Deo said, and so did Xander, and Buffy and Willow as well. Her hands moved like a blur and a few moments later she held up three chestnuts with unblemished hands.
The three Scooby Gang members looked with slack jaws at that, before Buffy said, "That can't be possible."
"It is," Deo stated with a smile, and said, "The Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire technique. I move my hands so fast, the flames cannot touch my hands. Do you understand now why you can never take this flask from me, Xander? You want to take this flask, you'll have to be able to do that at a minimum."
Deo watched him. Any random man would crack now, of course most would have cracked already. Xander still watched transfixed at the fire, three more chestnuts still inside. "I quit," Xander said, and Deo nodded half-sad, half-happy, "I will come back once I've mastered that move!" Deo's eyes widened and took in Xander.
"Xander!?" Buffy and Willow both exclaimed when they watched Xander take a step closer to the fire. "You can't learn that! You can't be doing what I . . ." Buffy was interrupted. Xander's hands shot out, grabbed the two chestnuts and pulled back out. His teeth were gritted together, and he finally let out a yell of pain after he pulled his hands free. He dropped the chestnuts and rapidly reached in the fire for the final chestnut, once again screaming in pain. Buffy and Willow watched in shock as they looked at Xander's blistered hand.
"No time like the present to start training," Xander then hissed at Deo and left, two concerned girls after him.
"My, what a guy," Deo muttered after he left. "He will never master it though."
"What happen if he not?" Lotion asked her mother as she came from the side of the house/restaurant.
Deo looked over and shook her head, "Eventually he will end up with useless hands if he trains like that." Lotion looked stricken. "Don't worry, I'll give up before that happens," she told her daughter.
Then Lotion asked, "What happen if he does?"
Deo looked over to Lotion, eyes wide, never really considering that possibility. Then she said, "If he does, I've never seen a guy with so much meddle ever before. He's already more than passed, if he does, you /must/ make him your husband for whole new reasons." Lotion nodded, and then sighed like a girl in love.
-----
Back on the beach in front of Xander's apartment, he had built a fire, and dumped some stuff in there to grab out of. He'd buy chestnuts tomorrow, the store was closed now. "Xander, you cannot do this!" Willow called concerned.
"AAH!" he screamed as he went to grab the things out of the fire. Buffy and Willow both bit their lips as they watched Xander go at it, screaming in pain.
An hour later Buffy tried again to stop Xander, watching in concern at the blisters on the blisters on the blisters and several popped-open, bleeding ones on Xander's hand. "Xander, if you keep this up, you'll have no hands left," Buffy said with concern.
"Shut up, Buffy!" Xander said angrily. "I /will/ master this!" Once again he went, and once again he screamed in pain. Then again. Willow tried to stop again, but he denied her. Finally, another five minutes of trying later, he sat back in exhaustion, and yelled in pain as the beach sand made contact with his burned hands.
Buffy and Willow went over and pulled him up. "No buts anymore, Xander, resolve face!" Willow told him, having doubted about using it in order not to crush Xander's dream. But it was obvious he couldn't go on. Willow covered the fire with sand, and then the two girls took Xander inside as behind them the sun slowly started to set. Xander let them take him inside and they took him to the kitchen corner. Willow opened the cold water and held up Xander's burned hands by his arms where they weren't hurt, and suddenly realized the insidiousness of Deo's actions. Xander couldn't tolerate cold water! "Buffy, hold him tight," Willow said. Buffy looked aside and made a confused sound, then understood.
"Huh, what?" Xander drowsily asked. "YAAA!!" he yelled out, and then his body started convulsing and shuddering at the seeming freezing cold. He tried to pull back, but Buffy held him tightly as Willow kept his hands under the cold water to clean out the sand and smooth over as many of the wounds as possible. Finally she pulled the hands out and looked at a completely out of it blue Lexa, her whole body still convulsing.
"Okay, now what?" Buffy asked deep concern in her voice.
Willow said, "Put her on the couch, and start looking for something to dress hi hands with." Willow pulled a book from her school bag, and held it up. "Jenny gave me this, she'll be training me in magic. This is a recipe book for all kinds of potions. Not magical ones yet, she said, but all kinds of old herbal remedies, proven to work. There's got to be something for burn wounds. If Xander has the ingredients in the house or growing around it . . ."
Buffy nodded as she finished putting Lexa still shuddering and convulsing and clattering teeth down on the couch. "Oh, god, Willow, she's turning purple, you kept her under the water too long," Buffy said in shock.
"Go grab warm blankets as well," Willow told her friend and stopped leafing through book for now. "I'll go make warm water to cover him with." Buffy nodded and went to do her tasks.
Fifteen minutes later Xander opened his eyes and found his arms wrapped in bandages, painful, but cooling without being too cool. He looked up at two angry girls. Buffy asked, "Is that worth it, Xander? All this to turn into a girl."
"Oh, this has gone far beyond that. This is personal," Xander told her.
"Xander, you can't beat her on this, you can't master that, not without a responsible teacher to help you at least. I doubt they actually train this with an actual fire," Willow told him sternly, but with concern. "Why don't just accept this, and give up?"
"And marry Lotion?" Xander asked her.
"Can't be that bad a fate," Willow said before she could catch herself. Making the others looked at her shocked. Willow meant it, she rather lose Xander and watch him marry that round-breasted bitch than watch him hurt himself like that this. Her heart ached, and slowly, reluctantly Buffy nodded. Xander snorted. "Besides, you can just give up, admit she's better. I doubt she's going to let you die next time there's rain. I doubt she's that cold-blooded a killer, I think she'll give you the cure if only you - I don't know - grovel?"
"Oh, no, this devil woman is going down," Xander said angrily.
"Men," Buffy muttered. "Get some sleep Xander, okay? No more training with the fire. We can't be around treating more wounds, we have to go home before our parents call the cops."
"Yeah, Xander," Willow said sadly. Xander nodded, feeling the pain. "I'll come by in the morning, redressing your hands, okay?"
"Okay."
-----
Willow entered Xander's apartment in the morning as agreed, having been given a key, as had Buffy. "Xander?" she asked, looking around. Was he still in bed? Then there was a muffled scream of determination. Willow noticed smoke through the glass doors leading to the balcony and the beach. "Oh, my god," she said and quickly ran out. True enough, there was Xander training with the fire again.
"Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!" he screamed when he failed again, then tried once more.
"XANDER! DAMN YOU!" Willow screamed in horror and concern as she saw the bandages having been burned off to the wrist, where there was a blackened edge. Xander looked up, and Willow grabbing him by his underarms and started dragging him back inside. "Couldn't you at least have waited until the wounds were healed!" Willow said with deep concern. She forced him down upon the couch and she examined his horribly burned hands, and then looked up in Xander's teary eyes. "I know it hurts, but I've got more ointment, that worked last night, right?" Willow asked him in concern.
"Hurt? . . . Oh, the pain," Xander said. Yes, now that she reminded him of it he felt the burning raging pain in his hands and grimaced. He cried onward lightly, and asked Willow, "Why can't I do it, Willow? What am I doing wrong?"
"Damn it, Xander," Willow said as she got out the cooling ointment and gently administrated it to Xander's hands. He winced with the pain of touch. "This is some ancient secret Amazon technique, probably takes years and years and years of training to get fast enough, and you expect to do it in a day?"
Xander shook his head, and said, "There's some trick to it, or she wouldn't have showed it to me as possible. She expected me to crumble and beg, but she also kept open the possibility that I could do it too. I know it, that devil bitch is too evil. If I gave up, couldn't or can't do it, she'll show how it's done and hold that over my head for the rest of my live."
Willow finished with the ointment and cut away the remaining bandages, and pulled fresh ones from her bag. "You're such a stupid, stupid, guy," Willow muttered and then looked in his eyes. "And I love you for it." Xander looked at Willow and blinked. Suddenly Willow had grabbed a hold of all her courage and leaned over, giving him a gentle kiss on the lips, then backed away.
Xander looked at her, shocked. Willow was beautiful, always had been, and now having the guts to put on just a little make-up, and working at her attire a bit, she could even be sexy. "Willow . . ." Xander said, looking at the lips that had just touched his.
"I know, Xander," Willow told him with a shy smile. "You don't think of me that way, just a friend." She started bandaging him, and continued, "But I'm going to make you think of me that way, and don't worry, I'm not going all psycho on you like Cordelia and that bitch Lotion."
Xander nodded, grateful at least for that.
-----
Xander sat in class, not paying attention to the teacher. He mulled it over and over in his mind, while he looked at the chestnuts he was painfully holding in his right hand and letting them roll with his fingers. How in blazes could you move you're arms so fast? He sighed in frustration; he just didn't know. He turned his head and looked out the window of the classroom, at the tree just outside of it. Thinking and thinking, and coming up with nothing. He watched as a leaf let go and was pulled along by the wind. The leaf went down, and then up again, it curled around a loop several times, made several twists and turns. Xander just couldn't think of how it could be done. He watched the leaf go down rapidly to the ground, more rapidly then he expected the leaf to go . . . Suddenly his eyes widened in understanding. He sat up straight, and raising his painful right hand in the air, he yelled out, "THAT'S IT! I UNDERSTAND!"
"Mr. Harris . . ." the teacher started admonishing him, but to everyone's surprise Xander jumped up from his desk and jumped over to the door. Xander opened the door and disappeared out the classroom.
"Oh, no," Willow muttered, and she jumped up to follow him, Buffy right behind her.
"Ms. Ros- Summers, what!?" the teacher tried.
Xander ran out on the lawn, to the tree and found several sticks. He put them together, and lit the fire. He threw his chestnuts in. He grinned deeply. Pure muscles would never allow him to move so fast, but if he channeled his chi around and through them and his arms, his chi should push his arms forward. That would make him move so fast. "Xander don't!" Willow called in concern, Buffy's concerned call following right behind. Xander grinned and concentrated, then moved his arms with enormous speed, blurring.
Willow and Buffy's eyes widened in shock at the sight of blurring hands and how the chestnuts were launched from the fire. "Damn it!" Xander yelled in anger. He didn't have the precision, hand-eye, as well as speed of closing his hands. He pulled some more chestnuts out of his right pocket and dumped them in the crackling fire.
Xander did again, now missing the chestnuts all together. Then again, and this time he had them. He began to smile and then screamed out in pain. "Damn it! Damn it!" he cursed, more people joined, watching in astonishment at Xander's display. "But almost had it!" Xander said with a grin. "Just a bit more practice." He did it again and once again screamed in pain. Then again, and again. "Damn it!" he yelled. Why didn't it work? It should work, and he tried again, screamed again.
"Xander!" Willow called out in urgency.
"Don't interrupt me, I almost got it," Xander said with determination.
"Your bandages!" Willow called and Xander decided to take a look. There was nothing wrong wit his bandages, what was Willow's deal? Willow came over, grabbed his wrists and turn his palms up, looking in shock, at dark spots on his palms. "They're not burning, Xander," she told him, and then looked up. "You kept the hot chestnuts in your hand."
Xander's eyes widened in revelation. He picked up the chestnuts he had dropped to the ground, and dumped them all in. With a yell he pulled them from the fire, and this time dropped them immediately once they were out. Nothing! Xander laughed! He'd done it, he'd mastered it! "That witch is going down!" Xander screamed eagerly, and then ran and jumped on the roof and disappeared. Buffy and Willow looked at each other in surprise for a few moments, and then ran as well, Buffy holding Willow tightly as she used her raw Slayer strength to jump them both up on the roof as well.
-----
Xander slammed the door of the restaurant open, and looked at Deo with blazing eyes. The Amazon had turned her head and taken Xander in with some surprise. "You're going down, demon bitch," he told her with a growl. The customers looked astonished.
Xander jumped forward, and snatched at the flask around Deo's neck. The woman just laughed as he missed. Xander looked at his hands and at the missing Deo. "Aargh!" he roared and jumped over the counter, finding a hole where Deo had just stood. "That . . .!" Xander jumped down the hole and found himself in the pitch darkness of the Sunnydale catacombs. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" Xander called, bristling.
There was some light, and Xander blinked. With a roar a dragon came at him from the darkness, framed by a giant monkey, and a giant spider with red eyes and scarily big fangs. Xander froze for a moment, and then grunted, charging right at, and then through them. "I knew it, just a special effect," Xander hissed and looked around. He found a small side-corridor and quickly went inside, finding Deo at a kettle from which smoke rose, images of monsters in the smoke.
Deo looked at him, and said in surprise, "Wow, even the great emperor Kuan Yin was scared to death of that one."
With a roar Xander went forward and crashed the pot to the ground. Now that no more black and light smoke was added to the mass of smoke, it slowly cleared, revealing torches and light returned to the room. Xander said angrily, "I'm American! I'm a Science Fiction fan and proud of it! We've got Hollywood and FUCKING DAVID COPPERFIELD! Did you think a few special effects were going to fool me!!"
"Eh, well," Deo said and then bolted down another corridor. "I'm not beaten yet, son in law."
"Aargh! Get back here!" Xander yelled and ran after her, soon losing her. "Damn it!" Xander chose one corridor of three he could choose from and ran down it.
-----
A catacomb room. Three ways in and out, two of them opposite the other. Air imploded into itself, shimmering with heat, a meter above the ground. An electric spark came from the small whole the implosion had created and sizzled against the ground. A bigger spark, easily a good sized bolt followed. The implosion point started to glow bright white and then grew and grew. One side of the sphere encountered the rock at the right corner of the one entrance way, and it melted right there. Orange lava flowed around the sphere as it grew and completely disintegrated the rock and lava that couldn't get away. Sand on the ground melted and then solidified into glass. More bolts of energy arched from the center of the sphere, striking a few random parts, one destroyed a rock.
Finally the sphere reached a diameter of two meters and then disappeared just like that, leaving a muscular, kneeling man, fists next to his body. On of his legs was knelt down, the other was on the sole of his feet. His hair was in spikes. He stood up; smoothly, like water, like a well-oiled machine. His face was a little elongated, and completely expressionless, dead, yet intelligent eyes. The man took a look around, stepped out of the indentation of glass, and stood still in the middle of the corridor entrance, knowing it was a well-defensible position.
Through his eyes, everything is red, and letters, numbers, signs and schematics zip across the image. 'Initial self-diagnostic.' Different messages kept rolling across it, but they didn't mean much to the male machine. They were really only there so whoever designed it could see if everything worked okay, if he, she or it chose to do so. A picture settled in the right, high corner. 'Primary target confirmed: John Connor,' appeared on the screen for a moment. Then 'Terminate.'
'Appropriate suitable clothing,' was the next sentence when a young man appeared from the right corridor across from it. Its audible sense heard, "Get out of my way!"
A moment later the young man stopped in front of him, taking him in. "What the . . .? Naked?" the young man spoke as schematic lines overlaid the young man's lower legs, then upper legs, and so up until all of its body and clothing were scanned.
'Match,' appeared on the screen. "Give me your clothes," the naked man or machine stated with a dispassionate tone.
"What!? Give . . .!?" the young man stated, and then added, "What kind of pervert are you!?"
"Give me your clothes," the naked machine stated, getting ready to do something drastic.
The young man than muttered words it didn't understand, "No chi?" The young man then roared and brought his fist back, yelling, "I said, 'GET OUT OF MY WAY!'" To the machine's surprise the man's fist crashed right into, and then through his chest. He pulled his fist back, pulling some wiring along. With a roar the young man then jumped up and kicked out twisting around his own axis. Unable to grasp how it happened, the machine still immediately knew it was decapitated. Connections with power sources in the body were severed, the chip inside the head switching to an emergency battery that wouldn't last much more than a few seconds. The machine could see its own body as both it, and the body dropped down. The head crashed on the glass, and that was very visible to the machine. It rolled onto the sand bottom of the corridor, turned the opposite direction to where it was facing earlier. It could see the back of the young man as he ran onward, and heard him growl out loud, "STUPID PERVERTED SEXBOT!!" Than its power fully failed and all went dark.
-----
A minute later Xander arrived in a large cavern, and he looked around, shocked. It was filled with water, cold water judging from the cool air coming at him. Luckily not yet cool enough to trigger his reaction. In the middle of the cool lake sat Deo on a small rock. Several more small rocks just peeked over the water.
"Well, that took you long enough, got the wrong path I see," Deo mocked him with a grin. "So what are you going to do? Just stand there, or will you come get it?" She grabbed the flask and wiggled it around.
Xander growled, and said, "Get ready to go down, devil woman! Here I come!" Xander then ran with all his speed, perfectly stepping onto the rocks, roaring out.
Deo grinned, and readied herself, then moved forward. She met Xander's Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire with her own, blocking each of his hits. Xander jumped back, looking at a smiling Deo. "You don't think it was going to be easy, did you?" Deo asked, both of them standing on a rock.
"Hmm, I expected it to be more difficult," Xander said, and then ran forward, and jumped high up and over Deo to her other side. Deo's eyes widened and grinned as she twisted around. With a roar and a well-aimed kick, she sent one rock spinning away, crashing into another rock and it too was shot away. Xander would never make it to any other rock with the strength he put in that jump; he'd fall into the water. Xander roared as he fell down right at Deo, who grinned at him. "Chestnuts roasting on an Open fire!" Xander roared and his hands turned to blurs.
Deo's eyes widened in mild surprise, part of her hadn't wanted to believe he had the stamina and chi to pull it off multiple times in a row. She once again blocked his hits and watched him crash into the water. That would be the end of it, except suddenly he jumped at her with a roar, left foot first and he crashed in her stomach taken by surprise. Her eyes went down in disbelief as Xander continued his motions. There she saw cracked rock ground with indentations of fists in it in a circle of water that closed back over it. Still shocked and dazed over what Xander had done and his kick to her stomach, she couldn't block his next kick. Xander twisted on his axis while flying up, way up as his right kick to her chin connected and pulled Deo along. Both were high up in the cavern as both turned further to face each other. "And another Chestnuts!" Xander yelled and attacked. Once again Deo matched him blow for blow and let the pressure of the blows fly her backward. She landed smoothly on a rock as did Xander.
"Incredible from such a young one, you used the air pressure of the force your blows to push aside the cold water," Deo said with a wide grin of admiration. "Too bad you still don't have the antidote."
"You think?" Xander said and jumped one rock forward. He held out his right hand, and the flask and necklace fell into it and he caught it, grinning widely.
Deo's eyes widened in shock an felt around her neck. Her eyes widened in revelation, saying, "That second Chestnuts was just to put distract me and get me to put distance between us. You already removed the flask from my neck with that second kick." Xander nodded as he flashed teeth with an even great triumphant grin. He then screwed open the flask and gulped the liquid inside it down; it tasted like warm water.
"Ah!" Xander said with a grin. "There, I win!" He reached down into the water, splashing it around to show his victory. "COLD!" he yelled, turning blue, teeth starting to shudder and clatter teeth. "Cold!" he screamed again and then ran forward with all his willpower. It would not do to fall over in the water. He jumped and just barely made to the solid ground, where he lay shuddering. "How? I won? Antidote?"
"Warm water," Deo told him with a big grin that made her look sexy. "I left the real antidote in the kitchen, just in case."
"You bitch!" Xander said through chattering teeth. "You cheating, demon witch!" Deo laughed.
"God! Xander really just won, did you see that! What a move!" Buffy's voice sounded from one of the entrance ways to the larger cave room. A shivering Xander and a surprised Deo watched as Willow, Buffy, and Lotion stood there, and had apparently been watching.
"Yeah," Willow answered and then the three girls rushed over to Xander, kneeling down by him.
"Brought real antidote," Lotion said triumphantly, at a slowly regaining color Xander. Deo sighed theatrically in defeat, as Buffy pulled out another flask and handed it over to Xander.
"Huh? It's empty," Xander said feeling the flask and shaking it, feeling something inside.
"Antidote inside," Lotion assured him, looking with twinkling eyes.
Xander got up and unscrewed the flask, pulling out a small piece of paper. "It's in CHINESE!" Xander roared out in anger. He had been learning some Japanese with Genma and Ranma, but not Chinese.
Deo nodded evilly, and said, "Yep, that contains the way you need to mold your chi to get rid of the condition. Even if you could read it, it would take you at least a decade to learn it! Now, I can teach you, or use my own chi to cure you, but for that, you'd have to marry Lotion first."
Everyone glared at the shrewd witch. "Hmm," Lotion said angrily. "Mom not play fair. Xander better than any man already, husband earned it. I not gone through similar ordeal. I translate." Lotion then did exactly that, translating the text out loud, and Deo gave an annoyed snort.
When Lotion was done, Deo said, "You still can't learn it." Her eyes then widened as Xander sank through his legs a bit, and then brought his right hand up. His thumb was pointing to himself, his middle and index finger up, his last two fingers curled down. He closed his eyes and concentrated, bringing his left fist against the palm of his right. Buffy, and Willow held their breath, watching. Slowly Xander's chi started glowing blue around him. Then his chi at his pelvic bone flared, making a twist around his body and then it died down to a dull glow again before Xander let himself completely go. Xander then walked over to the water and put his right hand in, grinning, then letting himself fall in. He laughed as she got back up. Lexa stood, wet clothes clinging to every curve of her body.
"Jusenkyo spring great curse," Lotion muttered as Buffy and Willow watched. Willow let her eyes glide over the near naked form of Lexa. The green, tight shirt with buttons that left Lexa's arms bare, hadn't gone quite see-through, but it might as well have been. Every detail of her bare cleavage, and her breasts and even nipples could be seen in the wet shirt that clung everywhere, as if it had sucked itself against Lexa's body. Willow swallowed and felt a stirring she hadn't expected inside of her, shocked at the full realization: Lexa was hot! Xander hot!
"I win!" Lexa screamed in anger, and then walked over to his friends. He turned back and finished, "Get it yet!? You and you're stupid daughter can take the next flight to China and start tying up your men again for all I care! We're done! Let's go guys."
"All right, Xander," Buffy said, still somewhat impressed with the battle she had witnessed. The speed and precision that Xander and Deo had showed was beyond her at this point. But soon . . . soon she would spar with Xander at his level she vowed. Her chances of survival would be boosted enormously; she hadn't ever thought stuff like that was possible, even for a Slayer.
Deo put an arm around her down daughter's shoulders, watching Lexa and her friends go, and said, "What a man. If I weren't already married . . ."
"Mother!" Lotion admonished sadly.
Deo hugged Lotion closer and said, "Don't worry, you may appear less then smart to him with your speech, but we're sending you to school for that aren't we? That will soon be rectified, sweety, and he's going to be mightily surprised when he thinks we're done. Time to play it his way, my daughter." Lotion nodded.
Further into corridor on their way back, Willow said with a huge grin, "You were great, you were incredible, Xander."
Lexa grinned and then her face fell, and whimpered, "Can you exchange the bandages, Willow!? The wet ones burn! Ouch! You got more ointment right! Please?" Willow and Buffy shook their heads, then Willow nodded reassuringly.