Buffy, Willow, Lotion and Lexa stood with Buffy's locker. "So, you really dusted him?" Willow wondered.
Buffy nodded and said, "Yeah, I did right after he came above ground. Didn't let him even see me, or me him. Didn't want to find out how that would be. I can't imagine what you guys went through with Jesse."
Both of them looked down, although Willow hadn't really faced the vamped Jesse, Xander, or Lexa at the moment, though only more. "Yeah," Lexa spoke sadly, "Dusting a vamp wearing your friend's body is tough."
"Let's stop the gloom," Lotion spoke quickly. "This is getting too depressing."
They nodded and started walking off. Lexa spoke up, "My class is that way, see you in the library later." Lexa walked off to the left, and a rather hot guy past her by in the opposite direction. Her head turned back, angled down for a moment, and smirked, before returning straight walking on.
Buffy's and Willow's eyes widened in shock at that, as the guy reached them, and Lotion gave him a quick look over. "That . . . can't be, I s-s-saw it this time, I know it," Buffy muttered in shock and then turned to a stunned Willow. "Please tell me I'm going crazy."
Willow shook her head, and muttered, "I saw it too."
"Saw what?" Lotion wondered out loud.
"Lexa - Xander - just checked out that guy's ass," Buffy muttered softly, and in shock.
"That's not possible," Lotion answered coolly. "You must have seen it wrong, she probably had a neck cramp."
"She's right, right?" Buffy asked Willow desperately. "I mean, this is Xander. He chases after girls, he's got the hots for me, he was still interested in girls as Lexa, it's still Xander right? Lexa gay? No guys, Xander not interested?"
Willow blinked as she took in the desperate Buffy, and she said, "So /that's/ what I sound like when I babble. Kinda cute."
Buffy took a step forward and grabbed her friend by the collar, "Don't do this to me! Give me an answer! It's not possible for Lexa to be interested in guys, right? Cause it's still Xander, right? Please tell me it was just a neck strain."
"Well, that depends," Willow said.
"Depends on what, and that is /so/ not what I want to hear," Buffy desperately told Willow.
"On whether his body just turned into that of a girl, or . . ." Willow frowned a moment considering her words, and she said, "/he/ turned /into/ a girl, meaning his Y-chromosome turned into an X-chromosome."
"What do you mean?" Lotion asked softly, and Buffy nodded quickly.
Willow shrugged, and said, "Well, if his Y-chromosome turned into an X-chromosome, he's 100 girl, all the way, meaning even the wiring in her brain. Which mean that if he was heterosexually wired as a guy, he'd be heterosexually wired as a girl."
"But, but, can't be, why wasn't he checking out guys much sooner?" Buffy pouted hopefully.
Willow shrugged, and said, "Wiring isn't all that makes a person do things, cultural pressure, peer pressure, his own sense of identity; and there's his consciousness, the non-chemical that was probably still male; but the longer it's routed through heterosexual girl thoughts . . . the more bi-sexual he'll become no doubt."
Lotion looked with wide open mouth, while Buffy went softly, "Ah, ah, no, that can't . . . this just can't . . . oh, no."
Lotion was still looking straight ahead, when Willow asked, "What's wrong with Xander being bisexual." It was obvious a 'me' was in there somewhere, but that was completely lost on Buffy.
The Slayer answered though, "Think about it! Guys would be actual rivals! It's hell enough with three other girls, my best friend included chasing him. What are we going to do once guys get a shot?"
Willow blinked - she hadn't thought of that - and then she said, "Oh, no!" Lotion then fell over unconscious.
-----
Later after school Willow, Lotion and Buffy entered the library. Xander was already present in workout clothes, ready for a training. Giles was obviously present in his library, and Jenny Calendar was present to teach Willow more about magic. "Great, let's get started right away," Xander enthused with a grin, finishing his warmup.
"Uhm, Xan, before we do that . . ." Buffy turned her head to look at the other two girls.
"Uh, yeah," Willow said with not much more confidence. "We'd like to talk to you . . ."
"Tell them it's not true, tell them it isn't! You just had a neck cramp, right!?" Lotion burst out with desperation, charging forward and clinging to a chair for support.
The Librarian, his girlfriend, and Xander looked at the Amazon with wide confused eyes. "What's she talking about?" Xander asked pointing his thumb at the crazy woman.
"Maybe you should sit down, Xander," Willow said, and Xander looked suspiciously at her. "Please, for our sake at least?" Xander shrugged and sat down, while Lotion finally let go of the chair and started pacing the library.
Buffy and Willow sat down themselves, and Willow asked, "Do you remember this afternoon as Lexa?"
"What about it?" Xander asked getting a little testy.
"You kinda checked out a guy's ass, we think," Willow said.
"WHAT!?" Xander exclaimed in shock.
Buffy babbled out, "Please, Xander, tell us you had just neck cramp, right? You just turned your head to get kink out of your neck. That's right, it has to be, it can't be anything else. Right, Xander? Please tell us that."
Everyone looked at her, and then Willow smiled saying, "That really is so cute. Am I that cute when /I/ babble?"
"Cuter," Xander answered with a smirk.
Willow turned back to Buffy, and told her, "You are /so/ cute." Buffy glared at Willow and let out an involuntary growl. Willow blanched, tried to move a bit further away from the angry super powered girl, but since she was sitting on a chair, she succeeded in tipping it over. With a yelp Willow and the chair went down, only to be caught by Xander just in time - one had at Willow, one had at the chair. He then put her back straight. Willow swallowed heavily, glad the frightening moment was over, only not quite: Buffy was still glaring. "Sorry, Buffy, you're not cute at all, nope, not- . . ."
"GET ON WITH IT!!" Buffy yelled bordering on hysterics, making Willow turn back to Xander in an instant.
"Okay, okay, right, where was I, ah, yes, checking out a guy's ass," Willow said as Giles and Miss Calendar joined to the two girls, and Lotion stepped around the table, stopping her pacing to take in Xander's answer.
"And I repeat: what!? And what makes you think that anyway?" Xander said in annoyance now.
"Uh . . . close your eyes," Willow requested, and after a moment of looking strangely at her, and she looking back - it seemed entire volumes were spoken in those brief moments - Xander complied. "All right, remember back this afternoon, after lunch, we're together and you're about to live, bring it back, imagine being back then there, got it?"
"Yep."
Willow continued, "Okay, so you walk off into the corridor after saying goodbye to us." Xander nodded. "Now a guy comes at you, you notice him just a bit, and he passes you. Then you . . ."
Xander's eyes snapped open, and then he turned white. "Oh, no, nononononono," Xander said in shock. "This can't be, no way, I- . . . AAAAAAHHHH!!!!" Xander jumped up, dumping the chair back, and it clanged to the floor. "Oh, my god, oh godohgodohgodohgod!"
"You had a neck cramp and it hurt?" Lotion asked hopefully. "And now really, really badly?" Everyone looked at her as if she were stupid. "What?" she whimpered.
"No," Xander said and slowly trudged back to the table, absentmindedly picking up the stair. Wide-eyes and jaw dropped he leaned on the table, and muttered. "I can't believe this . . . I really . . . no way . . . how can this be? I really . . . I really . . ."
"Checked out a guy's ass?" Jenny provided with an amused smirk, while Giles was heavily cleaning his glasses.
Xander nodded and let himself defeated fall into his chair. The girls all looked somber, just as defeated, except for Willow, who albeit would have preferred Xander just being into girls wasn't feeling as bad as the other two. "How can this be? I'm a straight guy!" Xander called out loud, feeling horrible, remembering the thoughts that had gone through his female self.
"Actually, you were a girl when you did that," Willow told him.
"But, but, but I'm a guy. A straight guy! Won't change with body, I still liked girls even when a girl, how!?" Xander called out hysterically, hands in the air.
Buffy repeated Willow's explanation with a defeated pout, "If turning into a girl means your Y-chromosome turns into an X-chromosome, which it seems it does, then if you're wired straight as a guy, you're wired straight as a girl."
"And you might always have been bi-sexual, you just didn't know it," Willow added, and everyone looked at her, some with glares. "Yeah, well, you see, it seems that everyone is bi-sexual to an extent, even straight people - if you can't understand at all what is sexy in your own gender, you can't make yourself attractive to the opposite one, you know? And, and . . . well, peer and culture expectations would simply make you focus on your heterosexuality, never really exploring your other side; but now that you're a girl, wired like you more straight than bi . . ."
"How do you know that?" Jenny asked the redhead.
Willow shrugged self-consciously, "I researched it after my bi-sexual awakening."
Xander looked at her with an open mouth, and then let his head fall onto the table. He lifted it up, and dropped it back down, over and over, saying one word with every slight bang, "I. Can. Not. Believe. This." Xander sat up straight, and yelled, "AAAARGGGHH!!!!"
"What's so bad about it?" Willow wondered self-consciously, while Buffy and Lotion just looked forward. Giles turned away, having had enough shocks for a day, while Jenny followed the proceedings amused. "I'm not bad?" Willow added with a pout.
"No, no, but look at me," Xander said indicating Willow, Buffy and Lotion. "And Cordy isn't even here. It's bad enough with me interesting in just girls, what's going to happen if I start showing interest in . . . in . . . I can't say it." Xander then let his head fall to the table, and defeated he muttered, "I'll be dead before I hit eighteen; interested in four girls fighting over me and add guys to it . . . I'll be lucky if I reach the end of the school year."
"Now exaggerating," Lotion called out in concern, worked up enough to fall back to her speech patterns before her Wonder Woman possession. Xander looked up with an adorable sad pout that send the girls' heart rates and mothering instinct soaring through the roof. "We your friends first, we protect, right?" Buffy and Willow nodded with determination.
Xander sighed, and said, "I can't deal with this right now. Crank up the music so hard we can't hear ourselves think, okay? Then we train, and I'll take things one day at a fucking time. Pardon my French."
-----
Outside a man with a goatee, wearing a suit, and holding a silver suitcase. He looked left and right as if expecting someone to jump at him from the bushes at any moment now. He came across a janitor, and he asked with a British accent, "Sir, if I may have a moment, I'm looking for Rupert Giles."
"He's our librarian. In the back, first building on the left," the janitor answered calmly. The man hurried along. "You're welcome," the janitor bit sarcastically.
The Brit walked onward fast, nervously continuing to look around. He recognized 'library' on a sign next to a door when he was about fifteen meters away from it, at which time he also heard a sound. He stopped, and looked around. Finally having turned around fully he could make out a silhouette. "Who are you?" he asked backing up fearfully. The figure let out a grumble, and for a moment its face came into the light, revealing a deformed half decayed female face. "Deirdre?" he asked shocked. The woman laughed and managed to growl at the same time; a heavy unnatural sound. "Oh, my god," the man said, turned around and ran. He reached the library door and jiggled the handle, but it was looked. He looked behind him at the advancing demonic figure, and slammed against the door. Then he pounded on it with his hands, yelling, "HELP! OPEN THE DOOR! SOMEBODY IN THERE! HELP ME!"
"Phillip," the heavy voice of the monster said, and he fearfully turned around. A clawed hand grasped him by the neck, and while pulling him off the floor squeezed.
-----
Inside a very loud techno beat sounded; much too loud to let the man's scream be heard. Xander, Buffy and Lotion were trading blows, while Willow and Jenny sat on the library's counter in a lotus position, deeply focusing on the pen lying in between them.
Giles sat at a table - the stereo producing the music on it - and he was rubbing his head in horror and annoyance. "/MUST/ YOU HAVE THIS NOISE ON!" he yelled, trying to come out over the music.
"IT'S NOT NOISE! IT'S MUSIC!" Buffy called out, narrowly avoiding a right cross from Xander.
"I KNOW MUSIC - IT'S GOT NOTES; /THIS/ IS NOISE!" Giles called out once more.
"YOU HEARD ME GILES, I DON'T WANT TO BE ABLE TO THINK!!" Xander called back - the answer cost him, since a double coordinated attack from Buffy and Lotion could breach his defenses. He staggered back under the effective assault.
"Wonderful," Giles told himself. "You stay in denial while my brain dribbles out of my ears."
"AND IT'S REALLY GOOD MAGIC TRAINING TOO!" Jenny called out from her position on the counter. "IF WILLOW CAN CONSISTENTLY LIFT THE PEN WITH THIS NOISE: ADRENALINE AND FEAR DURING A BATTLE SHOULDN'T KEEP HER FROM UTILIZING HER MAGIC!"
"WHAT!?" Giles yelled out barely having made out a tiny bit.
"I SAID- LOOK!" Jenny said with pride in her student. Willow too looked with wide proud eyes at her accomplishment: the pen was floating. "YOU REALLY NEED TO- . . ."
Xander turned off the radio and suddenly everything was quiet.
-----
Outside Phillip made a final choke sound as he died. The demon let him drop silently to the ground. The demon than choked and gurgled herself, and dropped right along the Brit. Out of nowhere the demon started dissolving: disintegrating bit by bit into a green-blue see-through goo. The goo then slid over to the dead Phillip and disappeared into the corpse.
-----
"Ah!" Giles sighed out with relief. "And all was silence."
"Yep, training about finished, just a cool down now," Xander said with a smile.
Jenny restarted her cut short sentence, "You still need to be able to do it faster during such hectic times, Willow, and make it consistent, but you're on the right track."
Willow smiled and practically bounced around enthusiastically - making the pen drop back down. Willow payed it no mind, looking back and saying, "Xander, Buffy, you hear that? I'm on the right track."
"We heard will," Buffy answered with a smile.
-----
The next morning
"I'm at the beach, and not an American beach, but those postcard ones where the water is too blue," Buffy said, sitting on a stone bench of Sunnydale High, wearing a skirt and a shirt that was tied around her neck. Her hair was done up in a loose bun, and two strands of hair hung down around her face. The finishing touch was "I'm lying on my back, and then a guy steps in my sun and asks me if I could lotion up his back with sunburn oil. I say okay and then realized it's . . . Brad Pitt."
"Oh, very good, now me," Willow answered with a bright face as she sat across from Buffy. She too was wearing a skirt. It was a loose one, reaching halfway her knees, and her hair was hanging loose and wavy around her face. One strand hung over the right side of her face; not really obscuring her beautiful face, but giving it an extra layer of allure. A dark red wraparound clinging to her body finished her outfit. "I'm sitting in a restaurant, all alone, at a table for two, eating ziti. Then a waiter comes and asks if it's okay to sit two people with me; since one table was double reserved and all the other tables are completely full. I think for a moment and say okay. It turns out to be John Cusack and Catherine Zeta-Jones on a break from filming a new movie!"
"You really have an eye for detail," Buffy said with a smile.
"Yeah, 'cozz, with the ziti," Willow said with wide eyes.
Lexa in tight jeans and tight, low closed blouse, and black sunglasses arrived. As she lowered her sunglasses with a single finger, looking over them, she asked with a smile, "Hey, guys, what'ya doing? And, whoa . . . Will, you look . . ."
Willow blushed just a bit, smiling, and Buffy said, "I told you it was a good hair cut, and wipe away the drool."
Willow blushed bright red and composed herself. "You did," she answered then with a quick grin. After that she answered Xander's first question, "We're playing 'anywhere but here'."
"Oh, cool, let's see," Lexa said thinking for just a moment, and then answered, "Right. In a sauna with Tom Cruise . . . and ew, I can't believe I tried to imagine that? Why did I come up with him!? Tom Cruise is too much a pretty boy."
"Hey, I like Tom Cruise, he's pretty, uh . . ." Buffy shut up realizing Lexa, aka Xander, had mentioned the whole thing.
"Yeah, what happened to your usual," Willow asked Lexa with a smile.
"Ah, well, no matter how much I hate this new bi-sexual nature of mine; I figured I just had to accept it, and try to give it a fair chance, an- . . ."
"YES!!" someone yelled out triumphantly, freezing Lexa in place. "I knew it!" the voice said, and Deke Fisher - yes, him, Sunnydale High's Red Streak Quarter Back - came out from behind a tree behind Lexa. "I knew it!" he yelled more as he came over behind Lexa. "It was only a matter of time before my good looks would sway you, my beautiful Lexa. Deke Fisher, Sunnydale High's Red Streak Quarter Back strikes a- . . ."
That's as far as he came, as Lexa twisted around, and landed a solid punch on the guy's jaw. He instantly shot up, and wobbled already unconscious around. With a blow of air from her mouth, Lexa sent him toppling over backward and then he crumbled to the ground. Lexa then grinned, and turned around looking at her shocked friends. "Perhaps this bi thing ain't so bad after all," she said with a grin.
Buffy and Willow looked up, and the first asked, "Why?"
"Well, this just proves I may have gained a taste for guys, but I haven't lost my good taste," Lexa nodded with satisfaction. "I was afraid I was going to turn into some ditz going all bubbly and large eyed at every popular guy around like most girls."
"We're not," Willow protested feebly.
"You're right, I should never have though that, but . . . eh, nightmares; actually that brings me back to the old trusty: Amy Yipp at the water slide park," Lexa said with a wide grin.
Willow noticed Giles off to the side, and wondered, "Do you think Giles ever played 'anywhere but here' in school?"
"Giles?" Lexa asked in disbelief. "Nah, Giles lived for school. The guy's still bitter there are only twelve grades."
"Yeah," Buffy added with a smiled. She looked up at Lexa, squinting at the sun even with her sunglasses, and then looking from one friend to another she said, "when Giles was sitting in math class, he probably thought, -There could be more math, this could be mathier.-"
"But, don't you guys think he might have gotten restless sometimes?" Willow wondered out loud.
"Are you kidding, his diapers were tweed," Buffy said with a grin, and just then Giles arrived, looking with some concern at the still unconscious quarterback. "Say, is that tweed?"
"Huh?" Giles said looking down at his jacked, and then said, "Ah, yes, it is. How did he go unconscious."
"He slipped on a banana peel, and landed on his chin," Lexa spoke sweetly, smiling at Giles. "Don't worry, I already picked it up and tossed it in the waist bin before someone else tripped over it."
"Ah, good, well done, now come along we have something to discuss," Giles said, and Lexa smiled at Buffy and Willow both of whom grinned back.
Once walking behind Giles ready to enter the school, Lexa took a slower step, pulled Buffy and Willow on either side of her closer together, bent forward a bit, and whispered near their ears, "If I had been a guy, he wouldn't even have believed me, let alone complimented me, and they say this is a man's world." Buffy and Willow gave her a grin, before focusing back on Giles.
"Tonight is an important night," Giles said as they entered the school. They turned left towards the Scoobies' lockers.
"What is it this time, Giles? Apocalypse? Vampire holy day? Preordained death?" Buffy asked, half-joking, half-serious.
"Ah, the old standards," Lexa commented, and Buffy and Willow gave him a smile.
"No, blood delivery at the hospital," Giles answered calmly as they reached the lockers.
"A free all you can eat for vampires," Buffy rephrased with a small scowl.
Giles turned around looking at the Scoobs, and replied, "I hope not. Be there at eight thirty, I'll bring the weapons, don't be late."
"When have I ever disappointed you," Buffy asked sweetly.
Giles angled his head to look intently at Buffy over his glasses, and told her, "Do you want me to answer that? Or should I just glare?" Buffy straightened her back a bit.
"Want some back up, Buff?" Lexa asked coolly.
"It shouldn't be necessary," Giles answered for her. "No hordes of vampires come to it, or people would have goten suspicious a long time ago."
"I can handle a couple, Xa- Lexa, don't worry, training has been good," Buffy told her friend with a grin. The on and off again girl nodded with satisfaction.
"G'Morning, England," Jenny Calendar greeted friendly as she arrived from behind Giles.
"Ah, Jenny," Giles returned suddenly more nervous.
Willow leaned over to Buffy and Giles and said lowly, "Feel the passion."
"Willow?" Jenny asked forcefully.
Willow lightly banged her fist on her present chest, faked coughing - badly - and said, "Coughing, not speaking."
"Are we still on for tomorrow?" Jenny asked Willow.
"What's tomorrow?" Lexa asked, as Buffy was busy with her bag and locker.
"I'm reviewing some computer basic to a couple of students who have fallen behind," Jenny explained. "Willow is helping out for extra credit."
Willow smiled back and up and Lexa, who answered with a laugh, "Those pore slobs, school on Saturday."
"How is nine AM for you, Lexa?" Jenny asked with a smug look. Lexa choked on the juice she was sucking through a straw from a small carton.
"Hey, Lexa, I see some slob on your shoe there," Buffy commented with a teasing grin. Lexa gave her a dark look and a so-not-funny sound.
"Cordelia is going to meet us there," Jenny told him.
"Ooh, here that, extra school plus Cordelia - mix in some rectal surgery and it's my best day /ever/," Lexa remarked sarcastically.
Jenny smiled and then turned her head to Giles. "Walk me to class?"
"Pleasure," Giles said and they walked off.
"Look at them," Buffy said with a smile at the retreating backs of Jenny and Giles.
"A twosome of cuteness," Lexa commented with a romantic smile.
Willow smiled too, and commented, "Could you just imagine if they got together?"
The three smiled nodding, then suddenly their faces went sour and quickly walked away, as Lexa said, "Ugh, I'd rather imagine the sauna and Tom Cruise again. One good luck though, Lotion won't be there tomorrow, that would be the death of me - all those- . . ."
"Nihau!"