Freaky Serena
I admit this was hard. I was trying to capture a weird Serena and at the same time focus on the overdramatic melodrama she and Stanton are forced to go through in many of our little creations. Hope its okay.
Vanessa climbed onto her purple, satin covers, barely able to keep her eyes open. It had been a long, long day and she had decided to turn in early. Falling against her pillows, she let a slow smile curve over her lips and pulled the sheets over her head.
Finally, she could get some sleep…
Nessaaaaaaaa…A gruff voice sent her bolting up from the covers.
Nessaaaaaaaaaaa…"Wh- who's there?" Vanessa called, rising from the bed. She took a baseball bat from her closet and walked in the direction it was coming from: the window.
Nessaaaaaaaaa…She opened the curtains.
OoooooOoooOOooooo…She flinched as a low moan evaporated from somewhere close by.
OoooooOoooOOooooo…"H- hello?"
"Down here", a small voice squeaked.
Vanessa obeyed and then quickly wished she hadn't. There in her mother's rose box, was the most ugly flower she'd ever seen. It was covered in mud and faded petals. Through the dirt, she could see Big Bird's head sticking out, a long pointy hat on its head.
"Help!" it squawked.
Vanessa swallowed hard and held the bat closer out of the window, just incase she had to attack. To her surprise, the bird grabbed it and heaved itself into her room. Vanessa shrieked as it tumbled across the carpet and into the leg of her dresser. "Owie."
Before it could recover itself, Vanessa grabbed the bat and began to beat the hell out of it.
"IIIIIIEEEEEEIIIEEE!" it screamed in pain.
Die. Die. Please die. She hit it harder.
"Vanessa, please!"
The bat lowered to the ground. She'd know that voice anywhere.
Big Bird stood and straightened out its black robes. It looked just like Harry Potter… if Harry Potter was a bright, yellow bird.
Which he's not.
It reached down again to take a long, wooden wand from the ground and straightened the pointy hat on his head. It finally looked up at Vanessa, and she gasped as it opened its tiny, orange beak to say, "Like my outfit?"
"Huh?" Vanessa blinked and watched as the bird took hold of its head and spun it around a few times. She bit back a scream. The Exorcist didn't have shit on this. It finally lifted its head off to reveal:
"Serena?"
"That's my name", she grinned, rubbing at her soft, dark curls. "You like? I thought I'd change my style a bit. Something a little bit bigger. And feathery".
Vanessa nodded slowly. "Right. Mind explaining why you were trying to sneak through my window?"
Serena's eyes grew solemn. "Yes. I have something to tell you", she whispered in a strange mystic voice, placing the pointy hat on her real head. "Something important".
"Couldn't it have waited until tomorrow?"
"No!" she grabbed her by the shoulders. "It must be tonight! While the moon is full!" A low, mysterious cackle escaped her throat.
"Serena", Vanessa frowned as she watched the girl decorate her room with pumpkins and black cat posters. "Have you been drinking?"
"Of course not", Serena hiccupped as she pulled another jack o' lantern from her robes. "Come. You must get ready".
"Are you on crack? Ecstasy?" Vanessa's eyes grew concerned.
"No" Serena scowled, tossing her a pair of jeans and a blue tank. "Get ready! The time has come!"
"For what?"
"I'll tell you when we get there". She smiled creepily.
Vanessa was about to retaliate when a gang of three men burst through the door and took Serena by the feathers.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Serena screamed as they dragged her down the stairs.
Vanessa chased after them. "Wait!"
"Save me!" Serena bellowed as she bounced over each step. "Save me!"
Vanessa grabbed a vase and beat the men over the head with it from behind. They dropped Serena and let her tumble down the rest of the way.
"I'm okay", she mumbled from the bottom of the stairs and pulled herself up. She suddenly looked up at Vanessa, her arms outstretched. "MY HERO!" She ran for her.
Vanessa winced and fought the urge to run away. She held out her arms, but Serena just ran straight pass her. She turned around to see a puzzled Stanton in her bedroom doorway, struggling to wrap his arms around the huge Big Bird costume.
"Serena, what are you doing here?"
"I came to warn Vanessa about something". She hugged him tighter. "I forgot now that you're here".
A frustrated Vanessa marched up the stairs. "You're welcome", she muttered, sarcastically. Her attentions switched to Stanton. "You're the one that's been sneaking in my room at night?"
He grinned mischievously. "Guilty as charged".
"Stantoooooon", Serena sang. "You like my outfit?" She spun around a few times before bumping him with the ass of her Big Bird outfit. He held on to the wall before he could sail away.
"It's a little bit early for Halloween, isn't it?"
"Well, I never!" She marched into Vanessa's room, bumping him roughly on the way in.
Stanton nearly toppled over the banister and Vanessa grabbed his arm before he could fall.
"Thanks", he muttered. "What's wrong with her?"
Vanessa shrugged and gave a nervous glance in her room as Serena had pulled a cauldron from her robes and began to brew a potion, all the while hissing viciously over the steam and laughing maniacally. "So why are you here?"
"Well", he smirked, trying to shake off the fact that his girl friend was losing her mind. "I come to cross you over, but I stay for the pie".
"The pie?"
He pointed to her mother's blueberry pie downstairs on a counter.
Vanessa sighed. Could this night get any weirder?
"Yessssss" She looked down to see Serena smiling secretively up at her, a green apple in her hand. "Apple?"
"N- no", Vanessa stuttered. How did she know what I was thinking?
"Telepathy" Serena said, blankly. "I do that".
"Really?" Vanessa's eyes widened. "All the time? Even if I don't want you to?"
Serena nodded. "Yup. So get used to it". She pulled out a bag of apples. "They're free".
"Nope". Vanessa and Stanton both shook their heads rapidly.
"I'll throw in another bag".
"Nuh uh".
"Baked apples?" she offered them a plate.
"I don't think so…"
She whipped a jug out of nowhere and dipped two of the apples in caramel and nuts. "Taffy Apples?"
Stanton started to reach for one, but Vanessa tapped his hand. "No, thank you".
This infuriated Serena more than anything.
"Is that any way to treat a pregnant woman?"
"Pregnant?" Vanessa gasped.
"By who?" Stanton snapped, suddenly angry.
Serena giggled and tapped his nose lovingly with her wand. "By you, silly".
For the first time in his life, Stanton was confused. Very confused. "Serena…"
"Isn't it wonderful?"
"We haven't had sex".
"I hope it's a boy".
"We aren't even official yet".
"I'll name him Cello".
"Plus you're a virgin…"
"I'M PREGNANT, DAMMIT! DON'T YOU BELIEVE ME?"
"No". He shook his head and gave her a half smile.
"WHY-" She stopped in mid- sentence and leaned over. "It's coming".
Vanessa immediately guided Serena to the bed and tugged at Big Bird's leg. "We have to get this thing off".
"You've got to be kidding me". Stanton felt an anime sweat drop coming on. He turned to leave. "I'll return when Vanessa's alone and you have your senses back".
"YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!" Serena wrestled him by the collar of his leather jacket. "YOU DID THIS TO ME, YOU BASTARD! YOU'RE GOING TO STAY HERE AND FIX IT!"
"Sere- mmmpppph!" He cried as his head was now twenty inches deep in the sheets.
"Just take the other foot", Vanessa pleaded with him. This was one battle he couldn't win. She heard him mutter something about Jerry Springer as he took hold of the Big Bird costume.
"Hurry!" Serena cried.
They gave it a sharp tug.
"FASTER, DAMMIT!"
Plop.
The costume fell onto the floor, leaving jeans, a white T, and an oversized stomach.
Vanessa stared, bewildered. "I don't believe it". She glanced up at Stanton.
"Don't look at me", he growled. "It sure as hell isn't mi… wait a minute…" He reached in his pocket to remove a blade. Flicking it open, he poked Serena's stomach.
POP!
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Both girls screamed.
Serena grabbed one of the pillows and commenced to beat the shit out of Stanton. "MY BABY! MY BABY!"
He snatched the pillow away. "Here's your baby". He held up a few broken pieces of yellow rubber and plastic.
Serena stared for a while before breaking out into a fit of foolish giggles. "Heh. Forgot I stuffed that in there. FLASE ALARM!" She beamed.
Vanessa started to give her a piece of her mind, when she realized what she was doing.
"Er… Serena?" She watched as the jeans and white T fell to the carpet, revealing a sexy black, scarlet nightie, complete with leather, chains, and the rest of the works. A pair of handcuffs dangled from her index finger.
Stanton's eyes widened. "Serena?"
"Yes, my love?"
"What are you doing?"
"What does it look like?" She tightened one of the cuffs around her wrist. "It didn't work the first time, so let's "accidentally" make a real one".
"I-"
"Stanton", she cut him off, her voice mysterious again. "Our child is the difference between world peace and the brink of destruction". She broke out a whip.
"And you know this how?"
"GAWD!" She rolled her eyes. "Don't you read fanfiction .net?"
Stanton and Vanessa exchanged glances. What was this fanfiction .net?
"Nevermind". Serena cracked her whip. "You have been a very bad boy".
Stanton raised an eyebrow and slowly backed away. "Serena…"
Vanessa grimaced. "You guys…"
"Come back here!"
"Wait…"
"Don't!"
"Hold on…"
"You can't fight it!"
"No…"
"OUCH!"
"Stop…"
"TAKE IT LIKE A MAN!"
"WAIT JUST A FUCKING MINUTE!"
They both turned around to gawk at Vanessa. Stanton rubbed at a few red marks on his back, the leather jacket forgotten on the floor.
"Take it outside! There will be no sex and bondage in this house!" She pointed to the door.
Serena glared daggers at her. "Fine. Come on, baby". She cuffed Stanton and led him out of the room.
"Wait!" He broke loose and ran back in the room, his arms still behind his back. "I came here to talk to you, Vanessa!"
"What about?" Vanessa scowled, watching the window just incase any more kinky freaks decided to invade her privacy.
"Your destiny".
Serena blinked. "Let me get this straight. I just had a baby-"
"A balloon", he corrected her.
"Whatever! And you came here to talk to her?" She blinked back tears. "I'M LEAVING!"
Finally…
"Bye!" Vanessa waved. Stanton did the same.
"Don't even try to stop me!" She climbed back into her suit and put the head on.
"We won't!" they rang in unison.
Serena huffed and pulled a broom from the wall.
Vanessa furrowed her eyebrows. "What are you…"
"I'll have to use yours. I left mine somewhere outside". She straddled the broom. "Have fun with my husband". She climbed up on the windowsill, her feathers billowing gently in the breeze.
Vanessa laughed nervously. "Why don't you use the front door?"
"No, thank you!" she snapped. "I've been flying these things for years. I think I know what I'm doing!"
"Serena!" Stanton called, realizing she was actually serious. "Don't-"
Too late.
"IIIIIIIIIIIIEEEE!"
They watched as she cascaded from the ledge.
Thump!
Another voice blended in with Serena's low, tortured moans.
"Chica!" the voice roared. "I told you about those drogas!"
Jimena's long, slender legs slipped through the window, an unconscious Serena not far behind. "Did she tell you?" she panted, addressing Vanessa.
"She was supposed to tell me something?"
Jimena scowled at Serena before recognizing Stanton. "You!"
Stanton ignored her and leaned down to take Serena's mask off. He patted her face gently. "Are you okay?"
Her eyes slowly opened. "Stanton".
"Yes?"
"I think I'm" She gave a small cough. "Dying".
His eyes widened.
"Don't cry. Don't cry"
"I'm er… not".
"Just"
More coughing.
"Just do me this one simple favor".
"Don't- ack! Ack!"
"What is it?"
"Don't- ack! Ackackackackackack!"
"Huh?"
She coughed one last time, groaned, and her head fell limp against the carpet.
They all stared in silence. Vanessa finally spoke up. "Is she-"
"No seas tonta. Don't be stupid". Jimena rolled her eyes and gave Serena a good kick in the side.
"OOooooOOOOooo!" Serena cried loudly and rolled around the bedroom floor. "OooooOOOOooo!"
Jimena shook her head. "I've seen death before, chica. You can't fool me". She took Serena by the shoulders and roughly pulled her to her feet. "What's gotten into you? You've been like this since I picked you up tonight".
"I'm possessed!" Serena cried. "Couldn't you tell?"
"By who?" Vanessa demanded.
"Lambert's evil girlfriend!" she cried, throwing her arms around Stanton.
"But I'm Lambert's evil girl friend".
They looked outside to see Aura strolling down the sidewalk and slowly turned back to Serena.
She gave them a nervous smile. "Okay. You want the truth?"
They all nodded gravely.
"I'll tell you the truth" she lowered her voice. "I'm from the past".
"Then how do you know our names?" Stanton inquired.
She stared at him blankly. "Why do you do that?"
"Huh?"
"Why do you ruin everything for me?"
"What-"
"CANT I HAVE A LITTLE FUN?"
"I-"
"CAN'T I?" She mumbled obscenities his way. "If I'd known this, I would have never let you cross me over".
"Stanton crossed you over?" Jimena exploded.
Serena nodded. "Yep. I can't remember if that was before or after he cheated on me with his ex- girlfriend that he thought had died centuries ago and we got in a fight and he broke my nose".
Stanton gaped. "I NEVER-"
"Yes you did!" Serena screamed. "I just don't understand why you treat me this way!"
He blinked, dumbfounded. "You know, I really liked you for a moment Serena, but now…"
"Go to hell!"
Vanessa shook her head. "If you two went through so much, then why do you stay together in the first place?"
They both stared fearfully at the writer. Thunder flashed across the sky.
"Because… we like it" Serena put on a fake grin.
"Yes" Stanton's grin matched hers. "We like it".
The sky was clear again.
"Well", Serena cleared her throat. "We have Atrox business to get back to so if you'll excuse us-"
"Wait!" Jimena took her by the shoulder. "If you're a follower, how can you still wear the moon amulet?"
"Fine". Serena crossed her arms. "I lied".
"That means, if the Atrox finds out-"
"It has", Serena informed them.
"How?" Stanton demanded.
"Duh! It has the series too, you know. It's coming. And it's mad. In fact, it should be here right abooooouuut". She looked at her watch. "Now".
They all gasped as a sheet of darkness loomed over them, a novel floating in it's midst. It slowly opened to reveal a white, luminescent page. Stanton stared at the black print.
""I appreciated the kindness Vanessa showed me, but I never felt the connection with her that I feel with you. I've liked you since the first time our minds met in combat. I've more than liked you, Serena." His hand touched her cheek."
"But this is the first book!" Jimena complained.
The Atrox laughed maliciously and held up the entire series.
"Can he do that?" Jimena winced.
"I guess so…"
"It isn't true!" Stanton begged. "I haven't betrayed you…… yet…"
The Atrox growled and scanned through book 5.
Stanton gulped as he was shown yet another page.
"Stanton grinned at the terrorist, then picked up the orange bag and stole a caramel apple. He bit into the crisp fruit. Sweet-"
The Atrox slammed the book. "Wrong page". It opened another one.
"He had always been careful. What they had done was forbidden. Only the Followers he most trusted had even seen them together."
Serena beamed with pride and started to sale The Sacrifice out of Vanessa's window.
The Atrox pointed to the words and glared at Stanton. "Says you".
"Says the narrator".
"You mean Ewing".
"Oh, c'mon!" Stanton yelled. "You're going to believe her?"
"Well, she's only the author, Stanton…" Vanessa admitted, sarcastically.
"You will both die a painful death!" The Atrox bellowed at Serena. "YOU FIRST!"
Serena let out a piercing scream, causing a few of her customers to be rushed to the hospital for intensive care. "SAVE ME!" she cried as the Atrox dragged her away. "SAVE MEEEEEE!"
Stanton did nothing but stare at her in contempt.
"YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LOVE ME!"
"Yeah", he frowned. "Well you pretty much ruined that, Serena".
The Atrox loaded its .44 Magnum 2000, the only gun designed to kill an immortal. "Heheheheh. It's a good day to die", it hissed in a Clint Eastwood type voice.
Serena shrieked. "It's going to shoot me!"
"No. Really?"
"Do something!"
"Okay". Stanton turned to make a run for it.
She kneed him in the balls and shoved the book in his face. "It's called THE FUCKING SACRIFICE DAMMIT! HELP ME!"
The Atrox held the gun up.
"No!"
An invisible smile slipped over its face.
"Stanton!" she pulled him forward.
It put its finger on the trigger. This was getting confusing. "Erm…"
"Don't!" he struggled to pull away.
"Hold still!" it growled.
Bang!
They all stared as Stanton fell dead.
ATTENTION! STANTON HAS JUST BEEN ANNIHILATED. THIS STORY WILL SELF- DESTRUCT IN APPROXIMATELY FIVE SECONDS. PLEASE BE COURTEOUS AND REMAIN CALM AS YOU SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST. GOOD LUCK AND HAVE A NICE DAY :-)
Vanessa blinked at the suffocating silence. "Er…"
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Serena screamed and ran around pulling at her hair before suddenly exploding. Not long after Jimena and the Atrox exploded as well. Vanessa was left alone with Stanton's dead body. She swallowed hard, waiting to spontaneously combust.
"Vanessa?"
She looked down, her eyes wide. "STANTON?"
He nodded and pulled a bullet- proof vest from under his shirt before looking outside to see what he had caused. "Eh… my bad".
She stared into space for a while. From now on this would be a lonely world. Serena-less, yes. But nevertheless, lonely. She turned back around. "Stanton?"
He wasn't there.
"Stanton! Where are yoooooou?" She walked down the stairs to see him in the kitchen stuffing his face with pie.
She groaned. "Half the population is gone and all you can do is think about pie?"
He nodded and handed her a piece. "Try some."
She reluctantly bit into it. "… hey! This is good!"
"I'm glad you think so!"
Vanessa turned around to see her mother in the doorway. "Mom!" She embraced her. "You're alive".
"Of course, I am, dear. Why wouldn't I be?"
"Nevermind". Vanessa shook her head and took another bite. "I didn't know you made this kind of pie".
She smiled. "I wasn't going to at first".
"Is reary gooo", Stanton stuffed another slice down his throat.
Vanessa nodded. "How'd you make it?"
"Well it all started when I found these apples in your room…"
Vanessa suddenly felt weak, her knees buckling. She and Stanton exchanged nervous glances.
Uh oh…
Well, I tried. Sorry if it sucked. Its actually kind of hard to make fun of Serena…
SERENA WILL BE THE NEXT SANE PERSON (AGAIN). THE QUESTION IS, WHO'S GOING TO BE THE NUTCASE?
Catty.
Darrel.
Jimena.
Tianna 1.
Tianna 2.
Derek.
Stanton 2.
Michael.
Collin.
Kyle.
Maggie.
Kendra.
Morgan.
Tymmie and Karyl.
Cassandra.
Lambert.
Aura.
VOTE NOW!
Thanx!