Return to Middle Earth

Kayo

Chapter VII: Interlude in a Bed or Two

Vilarion had told Auberlin how the Prince wanted the clumsy human in the same room as Thaniel. Auberlin had let out an annoyed groan, seeing as he had just delivered Shawn to his previous healing room where the human had received the stitches for the wounds from the spider. Vilarion commented how Legolas always wanted his friends under his own watchful eye. Auberlin agreed with a smile (so rare these days) and had some servants bring Shawn to Thaniel's room.

Legolas was still out in the hallway. Silmaril had come by only a few minutes before to check on Thaniel. Her diagnosis: rest and to take some medicine to completely remove the spider's venom every two hours. Silmaril had to leave though. Their father wanted to have a word with her. Not only that, but he was to have a conference today with the many leaders of all the Mirkwood outposts. It seemed the darkness of Mirkwood was creeping closer and closer to where the Elves inhabited. Some locations had daily attacks from spiders. The Crown Princess would be needed to witness how to make decisions to ensure that as many Elves would live as possible. And of course, this left Legolas to his own entertainment.

Auberlin transferred Shawn to Thaniel's room and left him on a bed perhaps ten feet apart from Thaniel's bed. When all the Elves were gone from the room, Legolas smirked and set to his plan. He wouldn't be able to move Thaniel for sure, since his shoulder was all bandaged. There would be too much risk of opening his stitches. Shawn, however, only had a bandage around his head. So he still had stitches in his stomach, no problem! From all the pressure the human had put on himself by trying to escape Silmaril and then battling spiders, Legolas was sure they could handle be jittered about once more.

With that in mind, Legolas went to the side of Shawn's bed. His hair was sticking out at some point from the bandages; the black contrasting with the white, making it very noticeable. At least Shawn had a shirt on this time (unlike Thaniel). Legolas spread his arms as far as they could go and started to push Shawn's bed in the direction of Thaniel's. The bed creaked on the floor, and Legolas had to stop several times to make sure that neither Elf nor human had woken up. And to his luck, all through the pushing and shoving, Legolas managed to set the two beds across from each other.

Just as Legolas was going to slightly roll Shawn closer to Thaniel, he heard a scratching noise. Legolas looked around the room. It was coming from the other side of the door. He must've not heard it because of the bed. Legolas had the passing thought that maybe another Elf had heard him moving the bed around…but someone would've come in and seen what the Prince was doing with two invalids. Thanking the Valar that that hadn't happened yet, Legolas went to inspect the door and figure out what was making that sound.

Right as he opened the door, a flash of black darted between his legs and jumped onto Shawn's bed. Legolas recognized it as a squirrel right away. He was about to go retrieve the vermin and set it loose outside when Vilarion's words came back to his mind. A squirrel was found with the human which refused to leave him. The squirrel must have lost Shawn when the rooms were switched. Legolas peered onto Shawn's bed and saw the squirrel curled up next to Shawn's pillow. The Prince smirked. Not only would Shawn and Thaniel wake up next to each other, but they would both see a squirrel in between them. This was going to be interesting.

::

Shawn was dreaming. Well, he would have to be dreaming, seeing as how he was floating. But he still had to tell himself he was dreaming. He was flying over a forest, Mirkwood he presumed, and he saw thousands of little black squirrels running beneath him, as if following him. Which was kind of cool; especially when they started to fly. Shawn felt totally like the Wicked Witch of the West with her flying monkeys, except he wouldn't call himself that. He'd be like: Evil Filipino of Edison with his flying squirrels. Wait, couldn't some squirrels fly anyway? Oh well, HIS squirrels weren't jumping tree limb from tree limb. They were floating just like him.

Floating floating floating and FIRE! Whoa! Where the hell did the fire come from?! Shawn looked below him and saw all of Mirkwood covered in flames. I swear, all I was doing was flying! As if the fire were Shawn's fault. But he did see something that could've started it. His little squirrel army was diving in and out of the fire, coming out burnt alive, and then falling into a part of the woods not yet lit up. The fire spread faster and faster this way, and Shawn realized it must have been the squirrels who started it. Then he noticed something: they had those red eyes like that stupid squirrel had that followed him. That was not good. Not good at all.

Suddenly he heard his name being called, and he was floating away from the ground and higher and higher into the clouds. "Shawn, melathron, kwivra…" (Shawn, lover, wake up…)

His eyes snapped open when he heard the enchanting Elvish language. At first, what he saw was an Elf with long blonde hair, which he figured was Silmaril. He remembered the first time waking up to the angel of Middle Earth (now the demon of Middle Earth since she was mean to him), and how he had tried to tell her he loved her, and the words being mumbled out of his mouth. He figured this would be just like before. He could just stare dreamily into her eyes, those luscious field green eyes. Wait…weren't Silmaril's eyes blue? Just like Legolas's eyes were blue…so then…Oh shit.

Shawn took a double take of who was lying right beside him, arm draped onto his arm…and bare-chested. If the eyes weren't enough to convince Shawn the person next to him wasn't Silmaril, the lack of boobs were. Before he could throw himself over the edge of the bed and onto the floor, away from the pervy Elf, Thaniel had wrapped his arm around Shawn's back and had pressed their bodies right next to each other.

"Uuma dela. Valina." (Don't worry. Just enjoy yourself.) Said Thaniel huskily. And before Shawn knew it, his lips were once again meeting Thaniel's. Which was not cool. At all. Shawn started thrashing about on the bed, kicking anyone and anywhere. He thought he must've hit Thaniel a couple times, but no. That didn't stop the over rambunctious Elf. In fact, Shawn nearly had a heart attack (in a bad way) when he felt Thaniel's tongue on his lips.

I am not kissing an Elf. I am not kissing an Elf. I am not kissing an Elf, Shawn chanted in his head. But amidst all the chaos that was Elf on human action, Shawn could hear cackling laughter. And peering over Thaniel's shoulder he saw Legolas, doubled over with tears in his eyes. This, of course, caused Shawn to lose it. LEGOLAS DID THIS?!?! THAT MOFO!!

Thaniel found himself all of the sudden on his back, and Shawn's knee crushing into his stomach. The wind knocked out of Thaniel, Shawn took the opportunity to jump from the bed and onto Legolas, successfully knocking them both to the ground. Legolas was still laughing, and Shawn had a burning hatred in his eye. Legolas wasn't worried that much though. All that the human could possibly do was give him a black eye…which he had done before, but hey! He was all healed now from BOTH the poison ivy and black eye. Hooray for no blemishes!

They rolled across the floor until finally Legolas stood up quickly and backed away from the insane human. Shawn was huffing on the ground. (He was a little dizzy – he HAD after all, just woken up from being unconscious.) Legolas took this moment to try and calm down Shawn.

"Shawn! Please stop for a moment. It was only a joke! It was just…what is the word…payback! Yes, payback! For all those times Nina and Chloe were after me in your world. And besides, I have to keep my word to Thaniel." He turned to Thaniel, who was looking quite pleased with himself, with a smile plastered about his face. Apparently, he really liked Shawn.

"So?? I never made Nina and Chloe go after you! They did that on their free will!" He pointed at Thaniel. "You made him do that!!!"

"No I did not! I merely told him that he could touch you again. I removed the order I placed on him if he lived."

"That doesn't matter! So first you tell him he can't touch me, then before he dies, you say he can, and he just HAPPENS to live so he can rape me?!!? What the hell, Legolas?!?"

Thaniel cut in with a sharp, "Legolas? Tula Sinome…" (Come here…) Legolas gave a glance to Shawn, starting to feel sorry for what he did. Apparently, kissing another male was not part of the social order in Shawn's world, even though it wasn't that predominant in Middle Earth either. Legolas remembered when Shawn had hugged him so that a guard person wouldn't suspect that they were doing anything bad. But that had been after they first met, and Legolas hadn't known Shawn that well then. Besides, it wasn't that big of a deal, was it?

Thaniel opted not to whisper, since Shawn wouldn't be able to understand him anyway. Legolas, thanks for letting me have some fun with him, but I think he's really…REALLY angry. Maybe you should offer him some kind of compensation? Hmm?

Legolas gave Thaniel a skeptic look. What kind of compensation?

I'm thinking maybe…a date with your sister? Or hook him up with any maiden! Or perhaps you should offer him a free kick to anywhere on your body? He said the last part with a smirk. Legolas just glared at him, but turned to Shawn.

"Thaniel suggests for compensation to my horrible behavior as a host," (okay so Thaniel hadn't said all of that, but Legolas knew what he meant and he needed it to have more substance), "that I should introduce you to a maiden of your choice in the kingdom…or give you a free kick anywhere…"

Shawn finally decided to pick himself up off the floor and pondered for only a moment. "I think I'll take the girl action, seeing as how I'm such a nice guy who would never want to hurt anyone, even if they do set me up in their best friend's bed. You are a horrible Prince and male to the Elven species, Legolas."

"I have worked very hard to become so," said Legolas with a chuckle.

Just you wait, Legolas, you're not off the hook yet! Thought Shawn.

The next half hour was spent with Legolas and Shawn tidying up the room, seeing as how Thaniel wasn't allowed to move his shoulder. They kept the two beds pushed together and all three sat together…almost like how girls sit and gossip. Except for the fact that only two of them looked like girls but were all male, which Shawn made a point of expressing. Legolas gave Thaniel his prescribed medicine from Silmaril, and it tasted foul, as usual.

It was in this moment when the three were talking about how Silmaril always made her medicine taste so bad that Shawn remembered something. Chloe's bag! The whole reason that they had gone off into the woods in the first place. Shawn asked Legolas to take it out, and Legolas did so, with only one problem.

"Shawn…a squirrel followed you here…and now it has latched itself to Chloe's bag," said Legolas as he held the bright pink bag over the bed with the black and red-eyed squirrel dangling from the latch. It was apparently trying to open up the back…and doing a horrible job at it.

"Why did a squirrel follow me?" Pondered Shawn, and a quick vision to the dream he had previous to his near rape by Elf came to mind. "Are black squirrels evil in Mirkwood, Legolas?"

"No, just clever little creatures." He said, easily pulling the squirrel off the bag. "Strange it would follow you though. They usually run from humans." Legolas got up and rummaged around through a drawer. He took out a small piece of rope and carefully tied it around the squirrel's neck. It didn't like having it on, and ran around in little circles trying to paw it off. If the three had been girls, which they weren't, but if they had been, they would've gone "awwww."

"Its name will be Norbert, and Norbert shall be its name. Because Hagrid had a dragon named Norbert. And so I too, will have a drag-err…squirrel named Norbert." Legolas gave Shawn a blank face. "You obviously haven't read Harry Potter."

"Harry who?" asked Legolas.

"Just don't talk anymore Legolas," Shawn sighed as he grabbed the bright pink bag from Legolas, who was holding the squirming squirrel in his lap. Thaniel was attempting to feed it some of his medicine; wasn't working too well.

Shawn poured out the entire contents of the bag. Let's see a brush with blonde strands of hair in it…Legolas must've used it…no doubt! The Lord of the Rings trilogy all in one book with the Frodo bookmark and fake ring tassel, excellent. He put that aside for a moment. Shawn just wanted to see what they had to work with. Pads…tampons…painkillers – nice! DIGITAL CAMERA! Oh the fun I will have with that. Some batteries…for the camera I guess. Pens…some paper. Notes from Nina. Chapstick – won't be needing that! Some lotion, smelling kinda good too. I should give it to Legolas. He'll appreciate that. Some make up crap…I don't know what have this shit is. Nothing really useful. Shawn gave up going through the individual pockets as he realized it was nothing but wrappers. No food. No gum. No water. Shawn was going to die.

Despite the fact that there was no food for Shawn in Chloe's magic bag of everything, he decided he had to carry on with his ultimate plan from before. He picked up the Lord of the Rings book and took out the bookmark with the dangly tassel and ring. He showed the picture of Frodo to Legolas. Right in front of his eyes. He might've been too close…but hey, he was getting desperate. Legolas really needed to start remembering the fellowship and Sauron…not to mention Merry and Pippin still needed to be saved.

"Do you know this hobbit's face?" asked Shawn.

Legolas studied the bookmark for a moment. Thaniel was entranced by all the pretty objects laying on the bed, which was good for Shawn because Thaniel got bored not being able to talk to Shawn and opted for attempting to hold his hand.

"I do not know who this is. But why is his face so dirty and grimy? And why is it so…squarish? It is like, he has no chin!"

"Legolas, would you agree to let me beat you with this bookmark until you remember who this is?" Legolas looked a tad frightened and backed away from Shawn.

"No…I am sorry, Shawn…But for some reason I cannot recall this person…or anything else you have tried to explain to me."

Now, Shawn was pretty mad that Legolas didn't recognize Frodo. Actually, he was ripshit because he thought that since hitting Legolas with a chair had only partially jogged his memory, he believed that if he showed him something he would remember even more. But no. Shawn never gets a break. So he just sighed and said, "Don't worry Legolas. It's not your fault.

"Something weird is going on here. Both of us couldn't remember who each other were until we saw something from my world, and well…you got hit in the head with a chair, so I think that helped. But I mean, this is just really annoying. I wish we had an Istari or someone magical and smart to like read our minds or something…"

Insert metaphorical light bulb over Legolas's head. "We could send for Mithrandir!"

Insert Shawn blank look. "Who?"

"Gandalf! He will know what is going on, or he will be able to figure it out!"

"Yea! Er…wait…" Shit, okay, Legolas disappeared during his run for Merry and Pip. Okay, so that means everyone thought Gandalf was dead. So that means that Gandalf has beaten the Balrog, and he is either dead and getting the life restored to him, or he's chillaxing in Fangorn Forest. I'm really starting to know this movie too well. Another thought occurred to Shawn. Gandalf was a part of the fellowship; why did Legolas remember him? "How do you know Gandalf if you don't know Frodo?"

"Everyone knows Gandalf!" said Legolas all-knowingly. "Shawn, I have been alive for almost three thousand years."

"True dat homes."

"So we will send for Gandalf!"

Shawn couldn't tell Legolas that Gandalf was probably dead at this moment. "Yea, sure…"

tbc…

Responses to Reviews:

Lily of the Shadow: I love Thaniel. I love him a lot. I will write a story with just Legolas and Thaniel and how they met after I'm done with this. Including Lanfeir. Woo!

AAAclub: I'm so happy that you devoted a couple of hours to reading my fics! So I thank you for reviewing! Legolas's partial amnesia will be revealed in due time. As for the rest of the story, just sit back, eat some sugar, and enjoy!

Das Blume: Heehee, the squirrel. You guys will love the squirrel…eventually. Okay, so this chapter wasn't that bad for pervy things…was it? Maybe…just a lil? Lol, Yea I didn't do Thaniel's dream only cos I've been writing in Legolas/Shawn perspective throughout my fics, so it be out of sync to write a Thaniel dream. Plus Shawn's dream is a omen for the future, and it's just funny when he wakes up with a guy next to him!

Nina: Yea, I had to show how Legolas is a little prankster. I love prankster Legolas. You've chased a squirrel? For a scholarship? What kind of scholarship program is that?? (And where can I apply??!) lol, just kidding!

Froggy: Leave the coffee, but I'll take the cake! ::munches:: Did you like the Thaniel x Shawn action? It was good, wasn't it? YOU LIKED IT. Haha, as I try to subliminally make people like it.

asp: The evil squirrel DOES rock. He has this bass and he jams down in my room while Thaniel and Shawn make out…I mean…while they play video games!

Bob: HI BOB! The squirrel is not creepy…and bloody? What kind of language is that?!? lol, just kidding. But no seriously, you have to be either from the UK or Australia to say bloody. It just doesn't sound right when an American says it. I wish I were Australian…

Kitten =-=: heehee, I put your face with your name! The squirrel will come in hand, no worries. (Wow, everyone wants to know about this squirrel!) And like I've told everyone else, the Thaniel Shawn action is fun. And good. I love Thaniel. And now, my Norbert, ATTACK!!!!1111oneoneoneone

lolly pop3: I'm happy! You reviewed! Reviews make me happy! Let's do that some more! Lol. This is a long update, ya know? Maybe…that means…people should leave long reviews? Hahaha

So there ya have it, folks! A nice long chapter! And more to come! I promise!!!!! Only two more weeks of school left!